Supernatural FIC: "Mockingbird" 10a/10; R, het (Sam/OFC), angst

[hiyacynth]

Title: Mockingbird (Chapter 10a/10)
Author: hiyacynth
Fandom: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, near-future fic, het; AU after "What Is and What Should Never Be"
Characters/Pairings: Dean, Sam, various OCs. Sam/OFC
Rating and Warnings: Story overall rated NC-17 for sex and thematic reasons. This chapter gets an R for dark themes and cursing. Spoilers: Everything

Comments

[iamstealthyone]

Congrats on posting the final chapter!

Great first half here. I love the long conversations between Dean and Curtis, and Dean and Jem. So much lovely angst and nice soul baring and good comfort, too. And Dean's talk with Sam works really well, too. I love Dean reassuring Sam, and I adore Sam giving Dean a little credit.

*hugs all the characters*

Favorite lines:

bells and lights were going off in Dean's skull like it was a pinball machine that'd just had a hundred shiny new balls dropped into play.

Awesome analogy.

And he was sick to death of Sam and the fucking Get-Out-of-Reality-Free card he played every time things got rough. Maybe it wasn't fair, after all Sam had been through, but fuck that. Fuck fair.

I really like this, because feelings can get messy and complicated and aren’t always rational. *hugs Dean*

"You got him on a leash?" Curtis asked.

Ouch. But I don’t blame Curtis for saying it.

She squinted at Dean, who'd just sunk onto the bed, and pitched lazily toward him, arms out.

Aww. I love this image.

Said it was like having someone drive her from the inside. She could look out the windows but didn't have any control over what she was doing."

Great analogy.

"Why Birdie? Why Sam?"

"I don't know," Dean admitted.

I like that they don’t have all the answers.

Dean watched as Curtis looked down at his hands again, picking dead skin from the center of a callous on the outside of his index finger, that spot where the wrench pressed when you tightened a lug.

Good detail.

My own wife. I've known her since I was nineteen. How could I not know?"

Poor Curtis! *hugs him*

And he really hadn't expected Jem to go monkey-shit-slapping furiously with her free hand, wrenching her other loose and adding it to the mix, shoving and gouging at Sam, pushing him off, screaming at him to get out, get away from her, how could he do this, how could he bring this into her house, onto her child, get away, get away you freak, both of you, get out get out get out.

Ouch, ouch, ouch. Such a painful image. Poor Sam, but I can’t blame Jem for reacting this way.

Dean took a last deep breath of cool, smoke- and pine-tinged air,

Good details. And this makes me want to be in a cooler climate. (It’s still way too hot out here.)

"Dad was right. You know what you have to do. About Birdie and me."

Ouch. It hurts that Sam thinks that, and I feel bad for Dean, because of course he doesn’t want to hear it.

"I tried. I tried so hard to be good."

Oh, Sam. *hugs him*

"I wanted to go," Sam repeated without looking up. "With Meg. I wanted to just give over to it, let everything be simple again. It was so much easier."

Eek!

"Look at what you're putting yourself through. If you were evil, you wouldn't give a shit about any of this."

I love this moment. Great dialogue.

"If I'm not," Sam said, "it's only because you saved me."

I love, love, love this moment. It’s so good to see Sam say something this lovely to Dean. *hugs Sam*

"My baby..." She dropped her hand, following it with her eyes.

Oh, Jem. Yeah, the little revelation about Birdie would hit her hard.

I can save Sam, no matter what.' Because he's Sam, and how could someone as good as him not be saved?"

*hugs Dean* (I’m doing a lot of hugging in this chapter, aren’t I? You just angst them all so well.)

"You did save him, Dean,"

Yay for Jem saying this to Dean. He needed to hear it.

"You did that. You gave him something to care about. Something to come out for, to save."

And yay for Dean saying this to Jem.

"I thought I could fix him. Never occurred to me that he might need something else-someone else. I thought I could be enough."

Such wonderfully angsty dialogue.

"You can't be everything," Jem said quietly. "Nobody can, not even to the people we love most."

So, so true.

"He loves you," he announced. "He's fucked up, I know, but he does."

Aww. :)

"He loves you, too, you know," she told him, and Dean tensed briefly and then relaxed, moving his arm to carefully fold around her shoulders as she finished. "He's fucked up, but he does."

I love her repeating his dialogue back to him.

[hiyacynth]

Congrats on posting the final chapter!

*deep breath* omgosh thanks. I'm so weird about it right now!

I love Dean reassuring Sam, and I adore Sam giving Dean a little credit.

I couldn't NOT, you know? After all the abuse and neglect poor Dean has taken, specifically from Sam, I couldn't NOT have Sam get it at least a little and let Dean know he gets it. My heart would have broken.

I like that they don’t have all the answers.

Lol. Lucky for me!

Have I grovelled at your feet today? *grovels*

[iamstealthyone]

Have I grovelled at your feet today? *grovels*

*hugs you*