[Addicted 006] A Start in a New Direction
Who: John & Sherlock
When: Sherlock begins his experiment in trying to see how he can keep John near and misses how John appreciates the simple things the most.
It had been nearly four days since the "examining" incident and John had been keeping his interaction with Sherlock to a minimum (even having to refrain from asking about the other man's feet). He had been keeping regular hours at the clinic (and even volunteering for a few hours) and also spent two more nights on Sarah's sofa.
Sherlock had plenty of cases to work on to keep him busy and - as a bit of a personal favor - got Mycroft's word that he would be watching his younger brother very carefully. [Even in a text it had sounded creepy to John. But then, the fact that Mycroft was basically the living, breathing personification of 'Big Brother' in the 21st century was enough to disturb him where the older Holmes brother was concerned...]
In truth, it wasn't even as if John were still upset with Sherlock about the whole thing. He had stopped feeling that about two days ago. Now, however, he was struggling with something else... He wasn't sure what the feeling was but it certainly included frustration. Frustration at Sherlock and his behavior - and John's inability to understand it.
It wasn't something that occurred to him until now. His whole meeting of and coming to live with Sherlock had happened in such a short amount of time ('whirlwind' might be an apt word in describing it), how much had he actually considered about the other man just hadn't registered. He just... trusted him. Believed everything he said and took it at face value. How or why could he do such a thing? Didn't he have "trust issues"? Could John truly have been so gullible? Or so stupid?
Sherlock had said as much at one point. However, while John may not have been a genius, he was not an idiot (no matter what the other man said). He felt he should be able to work out some basic understanding of how Sherlock reacts to the world around him (and the people in it).
It wasn't that he hated Sherlock - he didn't. The other man could baffle him, yes. Exhaust him, most definitely. But John also loved the rush, the thrill some of the cases provided - how could he honestly deny that?
And - he didn't know how but - Sherlock seemed to understand him on some level. Or maybe they understood each other in their own way. At least that was what John's therapist had been getting at.
John had basically surmised it as being like this: John is "diagnosed" with PTSD - a mental disorder. Sherlock is a "high functioning sociopath" which is also classified as a mental/personality disorder.
"So, we are, basically, drawn to each other because we're both cracked?" He had said, cutting through all the technical terms she had used.
She had blinked at him, flinching a little, slightly taken aback, "Well, I wouldn't put it that way..."
"Damaged? Unstable? Mentally defective? Are any of those a better way of phrasing it?" His temper starting to flare.
The session had ended shortly after that because she felt John was getting too defensive.
And now, at his desk at the clinic, with no more patients to see for the day, John was left with nothing but his thoughts - which never seemed to make much sense when he tried to dissect them - and an internet connection.
So, he did what any person would do in his situation: consulted the internet.
John knew automatically not to trust every thing he saw on there but right now, it was the most convenient place to start looking. [He also felt more comfortable about looking up this kind of stuff here on his work computer than on his laptop at home, were he was sure Sherlock - using his laptop for whatever reason - would find it in the browser history. John didn't always remember to clear it... didn't think he always should have to.]
He brought up a search engine and typed in "high functioning sociopath". It was a start.
When: Sherlock begins his experiment in trying to see how he can keep John near and misses how John appreciates the simple things the most.
It had been nearly four days since the "examining" incident and John had been keeping his interaction with Sherlock to a minimum (even having to refrain from asking about the other man's feet). He had been keeping regular hours at the clinic (and even volunteering for a few hours) and also spent two more nights on Sarah's sofa.
Sherlock had plenty of cases to work on to keep him busy and - as a bit of a personal favor - got Mycroft's word that he would be watching his younger brother very carefully. [Even in a text it had sounded creepy to John. But then, the fact that Mycroft was basically the living, breathing personification of 'Big Brother' in the 21st century was enough to disturb him where the older Holmes brother was concerned...]
In truth, it wasn't even as if John were still upset with Sherlock about the whole thing. He had stopped feeling that about two days ago. Now, however, he was struggling with something else... He wasn't sure what the feeling was but it certainly included frustration. Frustration at Sherlock and his behavior - and John's inability to understand it.
It wasn't something that occurred to him until now. His whole meeting of and coming to live with Sherlock had happened in such a short amount of time ('whirlwind' might be an apt word in describing it), how much had he actually considered about the other man just hadn't registered. He just... trusted him. Believed everything he said and took it at face value. How or why could he do such a thing? Didn't he have "trust issues"? Could John truly have been so gullible? Or so stupid?
Sherlock had said as much at one point. However, while John may not have been a genius, he was not an idiot (no matter what the other man said). He felt he should be able to work out some basic understanding of how Sherlock reacts to the world around him (and the people in it).
It wasn't that he hated Sherlock - he didn't. The other man could baffle him, yes. Exhaust him, most definitely. But John also loved the rush, the thrill some of the cases provided - how could he honestly deny that?
And - he didn't know how but - Sherlock seemed to understand him on some level. Or maybe they understood each other in their own way. At least that was what John's therapist had been getting at.
John had basically surmised it as being like this: John is "diagnosed" with PTSD - a mental disorder. Sherlock is a "high functioning sociopath" which is also classified as a mental/personality disorder.
"So, we are, basically, drawn to each other because we're both cracked?" He had said, cutting through all the technical terms she had used.
She had blinked at him, flinching a little, slightly taken aback, "Well, I wouldn't put it that way..."
"Damaged? Unstable? Mentally defective? Are any of those a better way of phrasing it?" His temper starting to flare.
The session had ended shortly after that because she felt John was getting too defensive.
And now, at his desk at the clinic, with no more patients to see for the day, John was left with nothing but his thoughts - which never seemed to make much sense when he tried to dissect them - and an internet connection.
So, he did what any person would do in his situation: consulted the internet.
John knew automatically not to trust every thing he saw on there but right now, it was the most convenient place to start looking. [He also felt more comfortable about looking up this kind of stuff here on his work computer than on his laptop at home, were he was sure Sherlock - using his laptop for whatever reason - would find it in the browser history. John didn't always remember to clear it... didn't think he always should have to.]
He brought up a search engine and typed in "high functioning sociopath". It was a start.