(no subject)
so basically i dont see a reason in being in this place anymore.
my life is pointless as of this morning when i woke up
im tottaly empty.
i have nothing absolutely nothing.
i don't have anything to give to anyone, encouragement wise.
i'm sorry to the very many of you who i haven't been able to help or encourage because of my own selfish problems, i really dont have any but i like to think i do. i decieve myself.
the demons in this place are unreal. they are taking over of my heart, soul, thoughts, love, and pride.
{Oh God hold me now. Oh God touch right now. There's no other man who could save the day. There's no other God who could raise the Dead(I am so dead)}
i can't express to each single one of you how much my heart grows faint when i think about hurting even one of you.i'm sorry because i know i have let you down. i love each of you more than yall can imagine.
i probably won't update again until after thanksgiving..
im gone to the beach wednesday, at this point i want to stay there and not come back.
i love you. i love you i love you.
im sorry because ive hurt you.
my desire to love God is useless it feels.
i want Him so bad. more than i think my tiny mind could put to words.
I love God with all i am.
But I'm not even sure how much that is...as of now its very little.
{oh GOD where are you now? Oh Lord hold me now. there's no other man who could raise the dead. so do what you can to annoint my head. oh God, where are you now? Oh Lord save me SOMEHOW.}
my life is pointless as of this morning when i woke up
im tottaly empty.
i have nothing absolutely nothing.
i don't have anything to give to anyone, encouragement wise.
i'm sorry to the very many of you who i haven't been able to help or encourage because of my own selfish problems, i really dont have any but i like to think i do. i decieve myself.
the demons in this place are unreal. they are taking over of my heart, soul, thoughts, love, and pride.
{Oh God hold me now. Oh God touch right now. There's no other man who could save the day. There's no other God who could raise the Dead(I am so dead)}
i can't express to each single one of you how much my heart grows faint when i think about hurting even one of you.i'm sorry because i know i have let you down. i love each of you more than yall can imagine.
i probably won't update again until after thanksgiving..
im gone to the beach wednesday, at this point i want to stay there and not come back.
i love you. i love you i love you.
im sorry because ive hurt you.
my desire to love God is useless it feels.
i want Him so bad. more than i think my tiny mind could put to words.
I love God with all i am.
But I'm not even sure how much that is...as of now its very little.
{oh GOD where are you now? Oh Lord hold me now. there's no other man who could raise the dead. so do what you can to annoint my head. oh God, where are you now? Oh Lord save me SOMEHOW.}