Feb 14, 2009 03:28
I didn't remember it was this awful when I started applying for jobs when I got my first degree. Maybe it was, but it was such a long time ago, and maybe now in frustration I remembered it as particularly easy when maybe that wasn't the case.
I am just so fecking depressed now. All this job hunting and rejection letters and the feeling like you are running out of time - it really does my head in. In hindsight, maybe I should've followed my dad's suggestion, to take my master degree straight after the first degree (or maybe just a year work). Maybe then the economy would still be fine and it wouldn't be too hard to get a job.
But in 2007 it had all seemed so rosy still, and I totally didn't expect - well, maybe I should've expected it. I mean, even in good times finding a job in a foreign country would be a challenge.
It's just - I feel like I'm in a dark age/period or something, and I'm so tired of bitching, of feeling defeated, of feeling so ... old and utterly useless like this. And even more suckier is that I feel so goddamn alone.
Maybe it's just one of those moods. Maybe I'm looking at all the wrong places. Maybe my mum is right and I should just go home - eventhough home doesn't mean easier and bigger number of vacancies.
I don't know. I don't fucking know.
life