Thinking about Death and Other Things
I was talking to someone about Death and Other Things and about fears about dying. She said that most people feared dying alone. I asked what she meant by "dying alone." Unloved, unmourned, no one to care that you shuffled off this mortal coil.
That's when I made her mad. I said I'd rather die alone, without leaving a hole in anyone's life, emotionally or financially, without hurting anyone. To just disappear without leaving a noticeable ripple is probably the best way to go; your effects will actually be felt long after you're gone anyway. "Ripples in still waters" and all of that.
She could only hear a whinging "I'm pathetic, nobody loves me, I want to crawl off and die alone." That's not what I mean. What would be best, of course, would be to die in a situation where your financial contribution wasn't essential to the well-being of the family, and where they were basically a loving family of Buddhist monks who could accept your death as the inevitable result of your birth.
There are few families like that.
I need to stop talking to people.