My lovely Girlfriend...
Three years back, and I remember when we were first dating rather clearly. We were such an innocent couple, just going out to get coffee, see a movie, arcade, school shindigs, whatever we could do to be together. I remember when she had first told me that she might move to San Diego with her grandmother, I was pretty bummed seeing as how we hadnt really entered the extremely serious stage of our relationship yet. We asked eachother whether or not we should give it a chance. We had discussed really deeply about what we really wanted out of it and whether or not it would be worth it to continue to see eachother with the potential distance thing. We agreed that we should give it a shot.
We were both in some dark stages of our lives for different reasons. She was having family issues, especially because of her mom, who was nothing more than a negative presence in her life at the time. I was just in a bunch of financial holes that I had dug myself into since the moment I had moved back to LA. The only rays of light that we could possibly see were coming from the auras that we saw from eachother. She literally kept me sane through my worse times (homeless, no job, sleeping in car). She was ALWAYS there for me, as I was there for her. As bad as things were, they only got worse when she actually had to move to San Diego (El Cajon, more specifically) because things had became THAT bad between her and her mother. These were the toughest times. I was living with a friend in Pico Rivera and working at Knotts Berry Farm. I was constantly taking trips back and forth to see her. One morning, I decided it was a good idea to drive back home from seeing her while being extremely sleepy. At about 4am, I drove my Mom's car, (she had let me use her car to take the trip that one time), into a 40ft embankment right off of the 15 fwy. I remember the moment I lost control, I heard tires screaching, I saw myself spinning closer to the edge of the road, and then I heard nothing... I thought I was about to die. The 'nothingness' that I was hearing was me in the car flying through the air at about 80mph. In that moment, I immediately thought about... well... everything and everyone. It was really weird. That was my moment of clarity. I didnt care that I was about to die, I cared that I wasnt going to be able to see anyone that I loved... namely Tatiana. I remember the extreme sadness I felt within those few seconds... as I type this I tear up just from the memory of that moment. It was intense. Then... the crashes and noises of glass shattering had taken over. I was petrified. It probably didnt last longer than a few more seconds but it felt like forever. The car settled, and I realized that I was still alive and that I could still move. I momentarily examined my body for whatever damage might have occured from the accident, and then I searched ferociously for my phone. Did I call 911? No. I called Tatiana to tell her that I love her. I broke down crying because I was so happy to have that chance once again. Through all of the turmoil that followed the accident, she was there for me more than she had ever been. One would think that that sort of accident would keep someone away from the wheel for a bit of time... but my dumbass drove back to see her the same day through the same freeway... lol. I just had to. I didnt give a fuck that I could have driven off that road again... I just didnt. I had to see her and nothing was going to stop me (I used my car the second time around).
Ever since then she has always shown me why I fell in love with her. Why it is that we stick around and get through all of the tough fights, and believe me, there have been tough fights. She is my best friend. She is my angel. I cant imagine being with anyone else. She has become a part of me that will never die, even if we were to break up. My heart has permanently been burned with the fire that is our love. Ever since the day that I first met her I just couldnt find my way around those unbelievably gorgeous eyes of hers. When I look at her I instantly feel better than I did the moment before when I wasnt looking. When we look at eachother... I feel so... complete. When I hold her hand I feel like nothing could hurt me and that nothing will hurt her. When I hold her in my arms, I feel her in my heart, pumping life into my body and breathing love into my soul. When we hold eachother... I feel like nothing else exists. When we hold eachother I dont need anything else. When we hold eachother the feeling that I get can only be true love... true friendship.
Im so thankful to her for giving me a chance to be with her, to give her life as she has given me. I love you, Tatiana... more than I can ever say.
~~~
Omid recently posted something along the lines of "Dont pass up the chance to tell someone that you love them". You said it, bro. Its the best thing to know that someone loves you as much as you love them. I think that whoever reads this should practice that... telling everyone who they love dearly that they love them.
~~~
To all of SoCal: I love you guys... a lot :) Even if the tournament scene dies lets not let the potluck scene go down with it.
We were both in some dark stages of our lives for different reasons. She was having family issues, especially because of her mom, who was nothing more than a negative presence in her life at the time. I was just in a bunch of financial holes that I had dug myself into since the moment I had moved back to LA. The only rays of light that we could possibly see were coming from the auras that we saw from eachother. She literally kept me sane through my worse times (homeless, no job, sleeping in car). She was ALWAYS there for me, as I was there for her. As bad as things were, they only got worse when she actually had to move to San Diego (El Cajon, more specifically) because things had became THAT bad between her and her mother. These were the toughest times. I was living with a friend in Pico Rivera and working at Knotts Berry Farm. I was constantly taking trips back and forth to see her. One morning, I decided it was a good idea to drive back home from seeing her while being extremely sleepy. At about 4am, I drove my Mom's car, (she had let me use her car to take the trip that one time), into a 40ft embankment right off of the 15 fwy. I remember the moment I lost control, I heard tires screaching, I saw myself spinning closer to the edge of the road, and then I heard nothing... I thought I was about to die. The 'nothingness' that I was hearing was me in the car flying through the air at about 80mph. In that moment, I immediately thought about... well... everything and everyone. It was really weird. That was my moment of clarity. I didnt care that I was about to die, I cared that I wasnt going to be able to see anyone that I loved... namely Tatiana. I remember the extreme sadness I felt within those few seconds... as I type this I tear up just from the memory of that moment. It was intense. Then... the crashes and noises of glass shattering had taken over. I was petrified. It probably didnt last longer than a few more seconds but it felt like forever. The car settled, and I realized that I was still alive and that I could still move. I momentarily examined my body for whatever damage might have occured from the accident, and then I searched ferociously for my phone. Did I call 911? No. I called Tatiana to tell her that I love her. I broke down crying because I was so happy to have that chance once again. Through all of the turmoil that followed the accident, she was there for me more than she had ever been. One would think that that sort of accident would keep someone away from the wheel for a bit of time... but my dumbass drove back to see her the same day through the same freeway... lol. I just had to. I didnt give a fuck that I could have driven off that road again... I just didnt. I had to see her and nothing was going to stop me (I used my car the second time around).
Ever since then she has always shown me why I fell in love with her. Why it is that we stick around and get through all of the tough fights, and believe me, there have been tough fights. She is my best friend. She is my angel. I cant imagine being with anyone else. She has become a part of me that will never die, even if we were to break up. My heart has permanently been burned with the fire that is our love. Ever since the day that I first met her I just couldnt find my way around those unbelievably gorgeous eyes of hers. When I look at her I instantly feel better than I did the moment before when I wasnt looking. When we look at eachother... I feel so... complete. When I hold her hand I feel like nothing could hurt me and that nothing will hurt her. When I hold her in my arms, I feel her in my heart, pumping life into my body and breathing love into my soul. When we hold eachother... I feel like nothing else exists. When we hold eachother I dont need anything else. When we hold eachother the feeling that I get can only be true love... true friendship.
Im so thankful to her for giving me a chance to be with her, to give her life as she has given me. I love you, Tatiana... more than I can ever say.
~~~
Omid recently posted something along the lines of "Dont pass up the chance to tell someone that you love them". You said it, bro. Its the best thing to know that someone loves you as much as you love them. I think that whoever reads this should practice that... telling everyone who they love dearly that they love them.
~~~
To all of SoCal: I love you guys... a lot :) Even if the tournament scene dies lets not let the potluck scene go down with it.