wooow.
haha wow i was reading some of my old posts. man i was a messed up 14 year old. i forgot what writting in a diary is. havnt written in so long. feel like im due with all the shit going on in my life and with no one to talk to. hmm lets see, in september of 2009, during my ott u frosh week, i find texts in my dads phone from another women, i caught him in his second affair, war world 2. me and my mom kicked him out and took all his stuff. it was really gross and sad. urgh, words cant even explain. well he ended up staying with her till probably a few weeks ago. we told him if he stays with her then he can forget about me and my sisters because we dont want a realtionship with him if hes with her. also during that exact week, we found out my sister steph, 25 years old, has cancer. cervical cancer. super heart breaking, i didnt even know how to react. you hear about older people getting cancer, but not a 25 year old ? wtf. its also agressive. so she had the operation, removed everything, so she cant have kids, periods, etc. devastating. but that didnt work out so well. the cancer was still there. move on to treatments, chemo and radiation. she was in the hospital for a very long time, super sick. the treatments had sort of worked, shrunk the tumors, so we went on vacation to celebrate. well when we got back the cancer had spread, lympnotes, bladder. and theyre out of treatments, so we will be going to toronto each week for clinical trials. brutal, disgusting, she should not be going through this. her friends and boyfriend have been an amazing support to her. we are walking the walk to end womens cancer june 6th with steph. meanwhile all this iwas attending ott u. well with all this stress, i couldnt go to class, or concentrate on homework so i had to drop out. lost 2000$. i also got H1N1 in october, to make matters worse. super sick for 2 weeks. i alsooo met my boyfriend mike at work in septemberrr, hes been amazing, good support, super nice guy. im really happy with him. as for my friends, i would like to say they have been there but unfortunately they havnt. they barely ask how my family is, how i am, etc. i was going to counselling at the hospital to talk, but i stopped going. no one truly understands what im going through, unless they have been through the same. i have a realllly hard time handling the divorce, and my sister. and no one is there for me except for mike, hes a boy, so cant do much. i guess ive been supppperr emotional. and when my friends didnt invite me to hang out i got supper bummmmed and tried to talk to them about it, they didnt care and it just ended up into a big feud. so basically i have like 4 friends teamed up on me, hating me, and not wanting to talk to me. because of what? i dont know. they were really harsh saying i dont need to always be invited and this and that. i guess ive been a mess lately.