[Pornfest Contest at MeinBruder] Klage und Anfang

[hime_chan17]

Title: Klage und Anfang

Rating: R18

Characters/Pairing: PrussiaXGermany

Warning: This story contains strong langue, non-consentual/dubious-consentual rape, and use of both human and country names.

Summary: Prussia is fed up with how Germany has left him alone in order to spend time with Italy. Then one night, enough is enough. Prussia was going to make sure Germany knows what it means to leave him all alone.

My choices:
Genre: Angst
Kink: Bondage
Pairing: top!Prussia/bottom!Germany

-------------------


Prussia was awesome. Nobody could deny that. He used to be the most bad-assed country in the whole world. He had awesome friends, an awesome bird, and an awesome life. Yup, he had the life.

Well, except for his occasional loneliness when his brother left him all alone to go to a stupid meeting, or to babysit that stupid Italian...or when his brother would forget that they had dinner plans, or when he promised to finally spend the day with him...or when his brother would just plain forget about him. That part of his life was not awesome. The awesome Gilbert wouldn't have cared that his little brother wasn't always there for him like he used to be if he had the normal brotherly feelings that should have been there; but as the years passed...well, the feelings of wanting to protect his precious little brother from all the bad in the world turned into feelings of wanting to keep him from the world completely. Wanting to keep him all for himself; to play with, to touch, to kiss, to mark him as his own and ravage him all night long. Prussia knew the feelings weren't right, but as time wore on, the stronger they got. He could barely hold himself back from punching the lights out of that annoying Italian whenever he clung to his West; damn it he was jealous. That lazy bastard didn't deserve his brother...not that he did either, but if anybody was going to be with Ludwig, it sure as hell wasn't going to be that brat! Prussia kept his feelings in check however; he knew it wouldn't go over well if Germany found out his true feelings. Ludwig was too thick headed to figure out those kind of things though...

One day though, enough was enough. Gilbert was on the couch of his and West's house, watching TV and minding his own business when he came in...and snuggling the arm of his brother no less! Prussia growled softly but kept his eyes on the TV, pretending Italy wasn't there at all. It wasn't easy with Italy's annoying-as-hell voice constantly asking Germany if they could have pasta or take a nap or some stupid shit like that. But Prussia's will was strong, and he was so close to blocking the noise out when something came out of nowhere and landed in his lap, causing him to let out a string of curses.

"Prussia! Prussia come and have pasta with us!" Italy whined with that stupid grin on his face.

"No thanks..."

"Veee...come on Prussia! Don't you want dinner?"

Gilbert ignored him, instead calling over his shoulder to his brother.

"West! What are we doing for dinner?"

Ludwig came into the room drying his hands on a kitchen towel. "We're having pasta, bruder. Since Italy's our guest I let him choose what he wanted to eat."

Prussia groaned, "Guest? You mean he's staying for dinner?"
Italy wrapped his arms around Prussia in a hug as he looked up at him with a smile, "I am! Isn't this great? Now we can eat pasta together!"

Gilbert all but pushed Italy off the couch as he got up with a growl. "Is there anything else to eat West?"

"You can heat up some leftovers, bruder, but I'm not making you a meal when Italy already made one for us."

"Fine!" Prussia angrily stomped off to the kitchen. This event was testing him, and he was barely passing. Lucky for him, Italy was too stupid to realize what was really going on, and West was as clueless as always. He reheated some wurst and potatoes while Italy happily set the table and put the food out. He had some nerve, serving his brother and starting to eat before he was there to join them; even if the idea of eating at the same table as the Italian made almost want to skip dinner entirely.

"Prussia come and join us! Your pasta's getting cold!" Italy called out, oblivious to the fact Gilbert was heating up the food for himself.

"I don't want your pasta!" he snapped back, earning a glare from Germany that he better behave. Prussia sighed and threw his leftovers on a plate before sitting down at the table, a good distance from Italy.

The dinner was filled with the Italian blabbing on and on about pasta this and sleeping that, and Prussia was glad he didn't have to talk. That didn't make up for the fact he was annoyed as hell, though. Besides that down-side, the meal was going fine, Prussia was enjoying his leftovers, trying hard to not imagine the wurst as something of his brother's (though he was sure Germany's was much bigger), when Germany spoke up.

"So are you planning to stay the night Italy?" That stopped Prussia's heart for a second.

"Can I?! Veee! Can I sleep with you Germany?!"

Gilbert clenched his fists on his legs, heart starting to pound this time. No way in hell was he going to let Italy sleep in the same bed as West, even if they didn't do anything.

"Sure Italy, but this time please be sure to wear some pants," Germany said with, to Prussia's great disliking, a slight blush.

Well that did it. Prussia couldn't hold it in any longer. "I never heard of a whore who wore clothes to bed..." he said as calmly and with as much loathing as he could.

"Bruder!" Germany hissed, while Italy only looked confused.
"Veee...what do you mean Prussia?"

Standing up, Prussia added, "Come on West...let the little slut do his job! Pants would only be in the way!" before slamming his fist down on the table.

At those words Italy started to tear up, "Germany...do you think I'm a slut?! What did I ever do to Prussia?!"

"Bruder! Apologize to Italy!" Germany scowled at Prussia.

'Great...' Prussia thought to himself. 'Now I got West mad...well now there's nothing to lose...'
With that thought in mind, Prussia turned to Italy who was now hiding in Germany's arms.
"I'm sorry Italy."

Italy peered out over Germany's arm, smile starting to come back.
"Really?"

"Oh yeah...I'm sorry you're a good for nothing slut! And a crybaby!" followed by a long verbal abuse rant that he ended up slipping into German for. Nevertheless, he made Italy cry even more.

"Gilbert!" Germany yelled, using Prussia's human name. Something he only did when he was really mad. "What's wrong with you?!"

"You're so stupid West! If you can't figure it out on your own you'll never know!" That said, Prussia ran out of the kitchen, grabbed his coat from the hook in the hallway and stormed outside, slamming the door closed hard enough that it put a small crack in the window. Gott, he needed to cool off somehow. He thought about going to his favorite bar. It would be dark and loud and nobody would be able to see the tears that were forming in the corners of his eyes. Plus there would be beer. And Prussia loved beer. He decided against that idea in the end, knowing things would just be worse if he came home drunk and pissed off. With a sigh, Prussia walked to the nearby park that he used to take his little West to practically everyday. He soon found himself in the playground and sat down on a swing, gripping the chains tight.

"Stupid...it's not fair...he loves that stupid Italian more then me..." Prussia whispered, the tears that were forming starting to leak out. "He doesn't give a crap how I feel...it's always about Italy! He used to never leave my side and now I hardly get to see him! And we live in the same freakin' house! Gott, why is he so stupid?!"

As his voice got louder, the more his tears flowed. Gilbert was thankful nobody came to the park at night and could see how un-awesome he looked right now; his face bright and his eyes even redder than they normally were due to the salty drops coming from his eyes. Yet a part of him wanted someone to see him like this...maybe someone would walk by and ask what was wrong. That would be something new. Everybody who knew him thought that he was so awesome that there was nothing that could ever bother him or nothing that could ever possibly be wrong in his life.

He was also quite skilled in the art of faking his expression and emotions by now, so that didn't help what people thought of him either. As much as he wanted anybody to come and find him like this, it was really only Germany he wanted to come. Have him run up to him saying that he realized what was wrong and that he would make it all better...take Gilbert into his arms and hold him close; so close that if Gilbert put his hand up between them he'd be able to feel Germany's heart beating through that surprisingly soft skin of his...

'No no no!' Prussia shook his head causing a few tears to fly off his face. He couldn't allow himself to think like that. As much as he wished for that, pretending would only make it worse as time wore on...he knew that from the beginning but he still couldn't stop himself from imagining what could never be true.

After sitting on the swing for awhile, trying to clear his mind, Prussia wondered what he should do about going home. He didn't think of that when he ran out of the house. He sure as hell didn't want to go back if Italy was there, but he couldn't stay in the park the whole night. At this point, he almost seriously considered going to Austria's to ask for lodgings for the night, but his pride wasn't that far gone. Getting up with a sigh, Gilbert headed back in the direction that he came. If he did go home he could always sneak in through a window, or at least sleep in one of the igloo dog houses out back. If they were as fun to sleep in as they were to play in, things might not be so bad. Before he knew it, Prussia was at the end of the pathway that lead to the door. He stared at the pale off-white door a few yards in front of him for what seemed like forever. Prussia took a step forward, but then quickly drew his foot back. There was no way he could go through the front door at this point; Germany would probably be up and waiting for him to get back just so he could scold him angrily for what he said to Italy. Though he may have gotten lucky and Germany would already be asleep...with Italy...in the same bed...naked... Biting his lip and flexing his fists, he decided he wasn't going to take any chances and headed around back. The only bad thing about wanting the room with the walk in closet, that would make the perfect "cave of awesome", was that it was on the second floor. But nature was on his side in the form of a large sturdy tree right outside his window. Prussia took a deep breath before attempting to scale the tree.

He tried to be quiet, but when your eyes are still blurry and the branch the leads right to your window isn't as strong as the others, things can get a bit difficult. Reaching out, he managed to grab hold of the edge of the window and sneak along the branch til he got close enough to fiddle with the lock he himself put on the outside in case of situations like this. After a minute or so, Prussia got the window open wide enough for him to slip into the pitch black bedroom, though not as quietly as he had intended to be. He quickly found the light switch, his eyes used to the blackest of night from various experiences in his life. What he did next, though, surprised even him.

Taking his shoes off and carefully closing the door behind him so the light wouldn't shine through, Gilbert made his way down the hall to Germany's room. Perhaps he wanted to just see if his brother and the Italian were doing more than just sleeping in the same bed just to see, or possibly to find out if he really had no chance in the world with his brother, either one of those thoughts made his heart pound as a wave of sadness washed over him, but he carried on and soon came face to face with Germany's door. It sounded quiet enough from where Prussia stood, but then again Germany was never much one to be vocal about anything. Taking a deep breath and holding it, the albino took the handle and turned it, ever so slowly opening the door and slipping inside quickly and just as quietly. Well if they were doing anything they were damn subtle about it. Bracing himself for the pain, and possibly harshly said words of surprise from Germany, Gilbert walked over to the bed. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw the German fast asleep with no trace of the Italian in sight. Hell, the room didn't even smell like pasta. Prussia stared at his little brother's sleeping form, unable to make himself look away. Dammit he looked sexy. Sure he'd seen Germany asleep plenty of times, but the way the sliver of moonlight drifting in through Germany's window as a cloud freed it from behind it's dark form caught in his golden hair was just too much. 'Gott, he doesn't have his shirt on tonight...' Prussia swallowed hard as he forced himself to look away from those strong muscles clearly visible in what little light there was. Those good thoughts didn't last long though. Gilbert wasn't one to forget the pain and hurt that someone caused him. With that in mind, he quickly left the room and headed back to his own to grab a few...necessary items. He was going to teach West a lesson; a lesson in what happens when you cause the great former empire suffering like the kind he'd felt for so long. Going into his closet, Gilbert gathered everything he'd need for the job, stuffing it into a bag, and making an appropriate wardrobe change before making his way back to where his darling little brother waited unknowing for his punishment.
-----------
Germany was still half asleep and hazy when he tried to turn onto his side but found that he was unable to. So he tried again, and when that still didn't work he panicked a bit thinking something was wrong. That's when he realized he couldn't move his hands. Or his feet. In fact, he couldn't move any part of his body. Eyes snapping open, he jerked upward to the faint sound of metal jingling against more metal. Germany's vision quickly adjusted to the darkness of his room, allowing him to see that each foot was tired to a corner of the foot-board of his bed, causing his legs to be spread open quite nicely. After trying to move his arms, he realized his wrists were bound together and then tied to the headboard. Germany bit his lip. He had no idea how he got like this, but he wasn't going to let being tied up stop him from trying to get free. While he attempted to undo the knots at his wrists, he heard light movement from near the window.

"Kesese...having fun there West?"

Well that startled Germany.

"Bru-bruder! When...did you get back?"

"I've been here for awhile now West..."

As Prussia slowly stepped closer to Germany, he saw that his brother was wearing a tight leather jacket that hugged his thin frame perfectly, the zipper half way down to show just enough of his chest to tease. Eyes glancing downward, he also noticed his brother's incredibly tight leather pants that were riding dangerously low on his hips, in fact if they were any lower the German would easily be able to see the Prussian's-

"Kesese, like what you see little bruder?"

Gilbert smirked as he noticed Ludwig's eyes were lingering on him for longer than the German probably realized.

"Bruder! What is going on? Let me go now!" the blond practically demanded as he tried to squirm his way out of the restraints.

Those words made Prussia's expression go dark, however.

"No. But you might not want to make too much noise...might wake up your precious little pasta whore..."

"He's not a whore bruder! And I had him go home after dinner..."

Gilbert raised an eyebrow.

"Oh? Well it doesn't change the fact he's a a little slut, and that I won't let you go."

Prussia stepped even closer, a ray of light from the moon falling on his face and catching in his eyes, making them glow a brilliant red.

"Wha...What's going on?" Germany tugged at his restraints again, to no avail.

"You wanna know what's going on little Luddy?" Prussia came to the side of the bed, leaning over so his face was inches from his younger brother's. "Don't worry, you'll find out soon enough..."

With that, Prussia picked up something from the floor before leaning even closer over Germany.
"Hope you don't mind not being able to talk for awhile West...as fun as it would be to hear you scream..."

The next thing Germany knew he had a gag in his mouth, and Prussia made sure to tie it as tight as he could without causing Germany serious pain. He didn't want to do that just yet; after all he had plenty of ways to do that as the night wore on.

Germany could only stare at his brother and wonder what was going on. What did he do to deserve this? Was Prussia really that upset about Italy coming over? Nothing made sense to Germany as his older brother crawled on top of him, ran his hands over his chest, touched him lovingly until he got a shocking slap in the face. Ludwig could only make a muffled squeak with the gag now in his mouth, but his eyes showed his confusion and pain. Not the physical pain, no Germany could withstand quite a beating, but rather the pain of betrayal from Prussia. All his life Gilbert had taken care of him and protected him, even after the war and the Wall was between them, Prussia always managed to somehow make sure Germany was safe and taken care of; and when the Wall came down, and his dangerously thin and sickly brother was reunited with him, he still devoted his time to taking care of his little brother. But now...now he was the complete opposite of the man he knew as his guardian...his friend...the one he l-

"Nnnnn!" Germany's thoughts were quickly cut off by a sharp sting across his stomach.

"Did that hurt West?" Prussia's red eyes glared down at his restrained brother, the hard leather strap of a crop lightly flicking his own palm. "Cause that's what I was going for."

Gilbert didn't want to hurt his little West...really he didn't, but it was too late for that now. He had to punish his brother for what he'd done, and teach him his place. Show him what the consequences were for all but abandoning him. He'd been holding his feelings in for far too long. Raising his hand, Prussia brought the crop down on Ludwig's stomach again, only this time much harder.

"Answer me when I ask you a question West!"

Germany squeezed his eyes shut, trying desperately to get free as the hard flap was brought down on his flesh again and again and again, welts quickly appearing on the once clear skin. He tried to cry out how much it hurt, but the gag easily prevented that, only resulting in more lashes.

"Mmmm! Mmmm!"

"Is that supposed to be a yes West?" Prussia stopped his hand briefly.

"Nnnn!" Germany nodded his head as quickly as he could. He'd give anything for the torture to stop, and some answers to be given.

"Not good enough!"

The crop came back down on Germany's lower stomach, burning skin turning bright red. Gilbert snarled as he looked down at his brother. Whipping him wasn't going to be enough...he would have to take things further. Much further.

Tossing the crop aside, Prussia got on the bed, kneeling between his brother's widely spread legs. He stared at his face for a moment, seeing the fear and confusion in Germany's eyes. Normally a look like that would have him freeing Ludwig from his bonds, or at least loosening them a bit, but Prussia was here for one thing only, and no amount of begging from Germany would stop him; not that Germany would be able to cry out. Ludwig stared into his brother's eyes, wanting to look away from brilliant red orbs that were filled with anger and pain, but somehow found himself unable to.

The sound of a zipper quickly drew his attention away from his brother's eyes though, and down to where the albino's hand was quickly making work of freeing his cock, quickly bringing it to life with a few well placed strokes. Germany's eyes grew wide; sure he had seen his brother naked before, but never really looked at the elder one's member. Now it was red and pulsing in Prussia's hand, and suddenly being tied up to his bed with the other man over him seemed much more terrifying then it did moments ago.

"Heh...are you enjoying this brother? Better make it last while you can West..."

Prussia's eyes narrowed as he let go of his member, hard enough now that he could accomplish what he came to do. He reached out to grab the top of Germany's boxers, roughly tugging them down as far as the younger German's spread legs would let them. He could hear the sound of the chains shaking, the feel of Ludwig trembling underneath him, he could practically hear his little brother's heart beat faster and faster with fear as soon as he realized what Prussia was going to do. Gilbert closed his eyes, grit his teeth, and after letting Ludwig try desperately once more to escape, thrust inside his little brother.

"NNNNN!!!" Germany thrashed around as much as the restraints allowed him, the pain being too much even for him. He had never told anyone, but he was still a virgin. There had been many times when Germany fantasized about being taken for the first time by his older brother, though none of those dreams involved him being raped and praying that it would end. He wasn't even hard.

"Tch! Dammit West!" Prussia thrust a few times to get used to the feel of how incredibly tight his little brother was. If he didn't know better he would have thought Germany to be a virgin. But knowing how much of a little whore Italy was and how much time Germany spent with him, he never considered that as a possibility. Italy...that name brought Prussia back to why he was here in the first place.

"Haaa...well West?" Gilbert glared down at his brother as he started to find a rhythm. "You wanna know what's going on?"

Germany nodded, closing his eyes, tears that were forming in the corners being squeezed out and rolling down his cheeks. He got a harsh slap in return.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!" Prussia snarled, hitting him again. "This is your punishment! You're not allowed to look away from me!"

Ludwig's eyes snapped open at that. Punishment? What could he have possibly done to deserve this torture? What did he do that would make his brother want to hurt and break him like this? Germany let more tears flow as he tried to understand why the man he loved so much had forced himself on him in the roughest way he possibly could. He couldn't begin to fathom why Prussia would be doing this, what reasons he had for his actions.

"You look confused West...I'm not surprised though...if you weren't this stupid you would have figured it out by now!" Prussia bucked up, hitting a spot inside Germany that made his breath catch in his throat.

"Do you have any idea how I felt West?! You fucking left me alone! You left me for that fucking Italian! After all I've ever done for you...and all that I did to try to show you how I felt...it fucking meant nothing to you!"

Gilbert was screaming at this point, hot tears of his own falling down onto Germany below with each new movement he gave. He wanted to ram himself into Germany. Tear him, make him bleed. Make him feel physical pain equal to that of his emotional pain. He would make Germany know his anger through his actions. In all the years that Prussia had dreamed about Germany maybe, just maybe, loving him back in the way that he loved him, it never once crossed his mind that he'd be forcing his little brother like this. But if he was going to get his revenge then this is what he had to do. Even if it would hurt him more than it would Germany.

"You could never guess what you've put me through West! You're so fucking stupid! You don't know how bad I've been hurting! Loving someone who never pays attention to you anymore...loving someone who you wished would just take your hand and say that they really cared about you...loving someone who could never love you back...well it hurts West! It fucking hurts!"

Ludwig's heart stopped at his brother's words. Love...Prussia said he loved him. Germany looked straight into his brother's eyes. He couldn’t see the love Gilbert was talking about. All he could see was anger and hate towards him. How could that possibly be love?  His big brother had to be lying to him...but...Prussia would never lie to Germany...he never had before, and always told him never to lie. Germany didn't know what to think anymore, or what to believe.

"You're always off with that damn Italian! That only makes it worse! Heh...not that you're smart enough to figure things like this out on your own...as if loving someone who could never return my feelings didn't hurt enough, you had to be screwing around with another man!"

Prussia began to thrust into Germany wildly, giving up trying to create some sort of rhythm. That didn't matter anymore. Nothing mattered. Germany didn't care. He never would care, would never understand how he felt. All he wanted was for Germany to spend more time with him. To realize how much he wanted Germany to care about him in the same way he cared about Italy. Was it so wrong that he just wanted to be loved by his little brother? Prussia looked down into Germany's eyes. The light blue was blurred from the tears he let himself cry.Those blue eyes no longer showed emotion. Prussia's words barely reached his ears at this point.

Germany heard the pain in his brother's voice, and something about Italy...Italy? He knew that Prussia didn't like the Italian, but he never knew why. What did the brunette have to do with it? Italy never did anything except maybe come over a lot and always spent a good deal of time with Ludwig. That still didn't make sense! Prussia...his own brother was raping him all because of Italy coming over? There had to be more to it...there just had to be...

Germany's thoughts were suddenly broken as Prussia hit that spot again, causing his already blurred vision to become worse. He could only give a weak and muffled gasp, and spread his legs just a little further. His body hurt so much, yet when Gilbert found that one place inside him he could only feel pleasure. But he was being raped, he shouldn't  feel good...maybe...if he just closed his eyes, he could imagine that this was just a dream, and that the world in his mind was what was real. In there Prussia was still on top of him, but was so much more gentle. His arms were wrapped around protectively, his long fingers were running softly through his hair, and he would plant kisses down Germany's neck as he slowly thrust in and out of him. That's how it should be...that's the brother that he remembered growing up. The brother in his nightmare wasn't real...could never be real. Yet another harsh slap to the face only served to remind him of reality.

"I told you not to fucking look away from me! All you ever do now is look away from me! You only have eyes for fucking Italy! I bet you’re thinking of the little whore now! Tell me West, when was the last time you looked at me like you do every time with that slut?! It's been fucking years! You're always off looking at him! And it's not just normal days...you left me all alone on holidays too! Like Christmas! How could you have left me alone on fucking Christmas?! While you were off doing God-knows-what at Italy's place, I was wandering the markets all alone! Just like we used to do, only you weren't there! I had to pass by families sitting down with their kids drinking the warm spiced cider together, or some mom buying her kids pfefferkuchen...hell there was even some guy with his little brother walking through just looking at all the ornaments just like we fucking used to do! That's not all...on the way home I had to pass by all the houses with their open windows...everyone eating dinner together or opening gifts...things families are supposed to do! Even the states spent Christmas together dammit!" Tears began to fall freely onto the man below him. All alone during the time he would have normally spent with Germany... it was the first year he had truly been left alone. Germany had no idea what it felt like to come home expecting to be greeted with a smile and a hug, just like how it had always been, but instead being welcomed by an empty house, no family in sight. The festive decorations only mocking his inner feelings.

Prussia sped up his movements, getting rougher the faster he went. Germany struggled against the bondage, loosening the gag just a bit from tossing his head. He still didn't really know how Italy fit into all of this. If Prussia asked, he would have been more than welcome to join them... though he was beginning to understand why Prussia felt so lonely. He really hadn't been paying as much attention to him as he should have... but it couldn't have been his fault! Gilbert never said anything! Was he expecting Germany to just know what he was feeling every time something was bothering him? That wasn't fair... and now Germany was paying for it. Then again, they were brothers. He grew up with the albino, he really should have seen the signs, noticed the distance, and tried to fill that in. It was partly his fault, at least.

"Heh...you...you still don't understand do you little brother? You really are stupid..." Prussia was oddly quiet now, as if he realized yelling was doing absolutely nothing, or that he just didn't see any reason in trying to tell everything to Germany. At this point Prussia had pretty much given up. He was emotionally tired and his heart was hurting so much he thought it would simply break. That constant pain that was always in his chest; all he had to go was just think of Germany being together with Italy, and he found himself unable to breathe. Even now his breathing was labored with the knowledge that he could never win against the Italian. He wanted to cry, but found himself unable to.  "If you really can't figure it out...I'll try to make it so you understand... I fucking love you West... I fucking love you so much that it hurts, and you can't see that. I'm..." Gilbert hated to admit it... he didn't want to admit it, but steeled his resolve; it was now or never, West probably wouldn’t talk to him at all after this. "I'm jealous that you left me for Italy."

Jealous! So that was it... Germany's eyes widened a bit as the pieces started to fit together for him. It really did start to make sense now. All the times Prussia had gotten upset when Italy came over, or when he seemed so distant and unwilling to talk when Germany got back from going out with Italy, or any other nations for that matter. Gilbert was that lonely...so lonely that all he could do was fake a smile and act like he felt nothing for his brother. Ludwig's tears started to turn from pain of his body to pain for his brother. He loved Prussia so much, but never thought that he actually loved him back, never thought that he could possibly feel so strongly about not getting to spend time with just them together...but this...no matter how he felt, how could he get over this? His heart was torn in two. One half still loved his brother with his whole being, and still believe him to be the kind and caring man who raised him, but the other half hated whoever it was thrusting into him, scraping his insides and making him bleed. Whoever that was, it wasn't Prussia. And he could never love anybody but Prussia. So which was real now? Which one was his nightmare?

Germany tried to twist away again, but got nowhere far. He tried tugging at the bindings on his wrists, but nothing happened. After much, somewhat painful, tossing around of his head, he did manage to make the gag even looser, not that it helped. Prussia only continued to thrust. He was getting no pleasure out of this, and the satisfaction that he had hoped he would feel from finally getting out what he wanted to say wasn't all like he imagined it would be. After confessing to Germany, things just didn't feel right. He said it himself that he loved his little brother. So why did he tie him up and force himself on him like he did? He took him dry...that alone must have killed Germany. He...how could he have done this? He was so caught up in his own emotions that he never even bothered to consider what would happen to West. His precious West...There was no way he could turn back at this point though. Germany had finally gotten hard and was looking so close to coming. He didn’t even pause to consider how that was possible.

"...dammit..." Prussia mumbled. He practically wasn't hard anymore, making things even more difficult and painful for Germany. Ludwig looked so broken and destroyed...even after the war and the Wall he never looked like this. Gilbert scrunched his eyes shut as tight as he could.
"Gott fucking dammit!"

Germany remained still as the man above him continued his movements. Did he still love him, even after all of this? Was there any possible was he could he still love him? The once bright blue eyes looked straight into the red eyes looming above him. They looked different than they did moments before...they now looked softer, still filled with pain, but a that of a different kind. Maybe...maybe this really was his brother. Maybe the Prussia he knew was still in those brilliant fire colored eyes. He really wasn't able to concentrate anymore to figure it out. His head was still clouded with all the previous things he tried to sort out, and now there was a new feeling...he suddenly felt close. So so close...so close to what? It...felt like it was going to be something big. Gilbert gave a few more thrusts, the last one hitting right against Germany's prostate, sending him over the edge, and cum splattering between their stomachs. Prussia could see this new feeling of pleasure wash over his brother's face, see his body tremble in the after glow...but once that was gone he didn't want to see his face. Prussia wasn't strong enough to look him in the eyes after this.

Prussia pulled out, his cock already on it's way back to it's normal state. He didn't even come. He got up from the bed, taking care to move carefully around Germany. The blood was finally visible to him as he moved, the bright red stain almost the color of his eyes. Bloody eyes... it was only fitting for someone like him.

He zipped up his pants, headed towards the door, and decided he'd call Austria in the morning to come and untie his brother. Right now he had to leave - he didn't know where he would go, but he couldn't stay here any longer, not after this. As he reached for the handle of the door he heard the soft and distant sound of fabric moving.

"B...bru...der..."

Gilbert's movements froze. Somehow during their rough encounter Germany had managed to get the gag loose enough that it would slip down. It was all that he hoped for, but all that he feared. He didn’t want to hear what Germany was bound to say. The questions, the confusion, the.... hate. He had to hate him now.

"Bruder..." Ludwig mumbled again.

"I'm leaving West...it'll be better for both of us..." Gilbert managed to turn the handle and open the door. All he had to do was take those few steps forward and he would be out of Germany's life for good. "I'm sorry..." he said in barely more than a whisper as one foot went beyond the door frame.

"Wait...bruder...please." He was expecting it. He knew it was coming. All he had to do was run forward and he wouldn’t have to hear it. That was all he had to do, so why couldn’t he move?

"...what is it West?"

Germany swallowed hard. Did...did he dare say it? Was it really going to matter at this point in time? If Gilbert was already going to leave then he had nothing to lose. Taking a calming breath, Germany spoke.

"I love you."

"Wh...what West?" No, that couldn’t be right, he must have imagined it... yes, that was it.

"I...I love you. Bruder..." Ludwig could hardly believe the words that came out of his mouth. Moments ago the man he just told he loved was breaking his body, yet here he was proclaiming his feelings. He wasn't sure why he did it, only sure that his feelings were true, he knew that better than anything now. He wasn’t sure if he could trust his own brother for a while. How could he? Yet... something told him that things wouldn't get better if he let him leave. "Please stay... with me."

Prussia couldn't believe what he was hearing. It had to be some sort of sick joke. Who in the right mind would tell their rapist they loved them right after the act was done? "I have to go West. Austria will be here in the morning."

"No! Bruder...bruder please!" Tears once again began to streak Germany's face. "Please don't leave me!" He couldn’t leave... he wouldn’t do that.

"I just raped you! Why in the hell would you want me to fucking stay?!" Despite his words, Prussia found himself unable to move forward. No matter which direction he went he'd be hurting Germany, and he couldn’t hurt West anymore. He just couldn’t.

"Please...please come here..." Germany didn't want Gilbert to go. He knew he was just raped, and he knew that he was crazy for wanting Prussia to stay. He knew he was crazy for still loving him, but something in his heart couldn’t let go.

Gilbert quietly sighed and turned around. After what seemed like minutes he was back next to the bed and looking down at his little brother's broken form, berating himself for doing something so disgusting to his little brother, the one he so fervently loved.

"Can you...untie me?"

Gilbert did as he was asked. He started with Germany's legs, wanting to get looking at the stained sheets over with first, then came back up to untie his hands. He watched sadly as Germany threw the gag to the side, sat up with a wince and rubbed at his sore wrists, the leather having made deep marks into his skin. Prussia couldn't say what it was that made him stand there that whole time when he could have been out the door, but there he stood, about to drown in his own guilt.

Germany slowly looked up at Prussia. It sure looked and sounded like his brother...but was it really Gil? He sat up more and painfully moved closer to the edge of the bed.

Prussia himself winced as he saw the look of pain flash across his brother's face. He was surprised that Germany moved on his own free will despite the pain that was surely wracking his torn and broken body. What happened next surprised him even more. Arms were wrapped around his body and Germany's face was

pressed tightly against his chest. He could even feel the tears soaking into his skin. "West...what are you doing?"

"Bruder...do you really love me?"

How could Prussia answer that? He loved Germany with all his heart, but how could he ever hope to explain his actions that were nowhere close to matching his words? But West deserved the truth now, and nothing else. "I...yeah...I really do love you West..."

Ludwig thought for a moment, still clinging to his brother. Brother...yes. This man had to be his brother. There was no one else who had this scent and comforting feel. The one that he remembered from when he was young. The nights when he couldn't sleep and Prussia would let him into his bed, the hugs after he came back from fights, the times carrying him back after drinking way too much during Oktoberfest... this is what the brother he loved was like.

"Good..." Germany tugged Prussia to lay down next to him.

Prussia still couldn't figure out why he was doing the things he did, but when Ludwig pulled at him to lay down beside him he didn’t fight it. "West, I...I'm sorry..." It was only now he realized all that he did. All that he shouldn’t have done, all that he could have done better. “I... I shouldn’t have...”

“It was a misunderstanding, wasn’t it? All with Italy...”

A tear fell down Prussia’s cheek. “Ja... ja it was...”

Germany didn't say anything, and instead wiped away the tear, only to have more fall. He held on tighter to his brother... his love. There was still a lot that needed to be explained, and a lot of things that needed to be said and worked out between them, but now wasn't the time. Germany knew it would take awhile for things to go back to normal, but right now he knew this was what felt right. This... was where he belonged. This was home.

"It's... it’ll be okay, just... next time don't forget the lube, okay?"

Prussia gave up on trying to fight the tears, still manage to smile through them. “Sure West.” Next time. He liked the sound of that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Long fanfiction is long ;A; Thank you very much for taking the time to read it though~ I appologize again, if they seem out of character, but I really wanted to write about Prussia having all these feelings of being lonely and jealous, though I really didn't know exactly how Germany would act and feel during this. I'd also just like to thank my awesome friend for reading over this and telling me what needed to be fixed and giving suggestions. You know who you are. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading this~ And once again, thank you~

Notes:
*Pfefferkuchen is German for "pepper cake", otherwise known as gingerbread.
*"Even the states..." refers to the 15 seperate states that make up Germany. Well, technically there are 16, but I consider Berlin to just go with with Germany as if it didn't exist seperatly XP