(no subject)
Two weeks ago, I received a text message from my mum. I guess it was very disheartening. I couldnt sleep well since. She was blaming me for not including her in my life etc.
I pondered for the last two weeks. I even dreamt of it.
I do not know how I could resolve this issue.
I tried, early this year. But it was really tough.
I know it sounds very unfilial to be shooting this out : But sometimes, I feel that she is just like a black hole. She literally sucks every emotion and soul out of it. She never fails to make me feel bad about not giving enough to the family. Not being as good as my brother. Not being as docile as I should have been. And perhaps, for the very fact that I love men. Year after year, she refused to admit or talk about my sexuality , even though I have been transparent to all my folks about it.
I pop her a text back finally: : " After all these years, have you ever asked me how I have been surviving on my own ? Or asked me if I have been happy? Its not that I do not want to tell you mum. You never asked. You never really bother."
*******************************************
I am not hankering over this fact. But it will be one huge disappointment in this lifetime.
I pondered for the last two weeks. I even dreamt of it.
I do not know how I could resolve this issue.
I tried, early this year. But it was really tough.
I know it sounds very unfilial to be shooting this out : But sometimes, I feel that she is just like a black hole. She literally sucks every emotion and soul out of it. She never fails to make me feel bad about not giving enough to the family. Not being as good as my brother. Not being as docile as I should have been. And perhaps, for the very fact that I love men. Year after year, she refused to admit or talk about my sexuality , even though I have been transparent to all my folks about it.
I pop her a text back finally: : " After all these years, have you ever asked me how I have been surviving on my own ? Or asked me if I have been happy? Its not that I do not want to tell you mum. You never asked. You never really bother."
*******************************************
I am not hankering over this fact. But it will be one huge disappointment in this lifetime.