(no subject)
not thinking about you makes it easier.
but then i worry when you start to slip away,
as if i actually forgot about you, as if i really dont care.
which is the objective, isn't it?
but not in reality.
i am so scared to actually forget, that when i feel like
i am starting to, i drive myself insane remembering and put
my heart through such immense pain.
but then i cant handle that much pain, so i let you slip again.
i shouldn't being playing tug o war with my heart like this.
i shouldn't be playing tug o war with your memory.
but then again, you shouldn't be just a memory anyways.
so i guess all rules are out the door.
but then i worry when you start to slip away,
as if i actually forgot about you, as if i really dont care.
which is the objective, isn't it?
but not in reality.
i am so scared to actually forget, that when i feel like
i am starting to, i drive myself insane remembering and put
my heart through such immense pain.
but then i cant handle that much pain, so i let you slip again.
i shouldn't being playing tug o war with my heart like this.
i shouldn't be playing tug o war with your memory.
but then again, you shouldn't be just a memory anyways.
so i guess all rules are out the door.