North Jersey Suffers Outbreak of Cosmic Dandruff
HACKENSACK, NJ: North Jerseyans awoke to the heartbreak of cosmic dandruff this morning. The outbreak began after dawn, and is expected to continue until later tonight. Crews coated the roads last night with Head and ShouldersTM and SelsunBlueTM, but this has had little effect in ameliorating the outbreak. Complained one crew chief, "It just sticks to everything." An accumulation of 3 to 5 inches of flakes is expected. Crews will be taking sterner measures to the flakes throughout the day.
It couldn’t have done this last night?!?