Oh Hil, that was lovely!!! I'm finally catching up on LJ and am happy to have seen this and done the whole clicky thing :-)
I particularly liked this passage:
“Thanks, you know, for…” She started crying, the emotion sudden and catching him off-guard. This time it was the quiet, pretty kind of tears-the ones that broke his heart as soon as they started falling. He wanted to hug her but couldn’t, and fidgeted instead-with his hands, feet, avoiding saying anything, repressing the urge to step into her, and hold her up, and say that everything was going to be okay, now, everything-
But that was too fairytale, no matter how much he’d been drinking. Instead he awkwardly mumbled “Don’t cry, Veronica,” which only seemed to make her cry harder.
The room was dark save for the light from the party and the pool below. She turned away from him, her hands wiping at her tears, and as she moved he could see her less and less. She became a shadow when she sat down on the bed. He stood there, watching her silhouette, wanting to speak but afraid to.
“I’m sorry, for…” Veronica’s voice was thick. “Beinglike this.”
“You should be,” he retorted before he could think. Angry, tear-filled eyes glared up at him in the darkness as he hurried to backtrack, “Not for being upset, Veronica. For letting him get you upset in the first place.”
Thank you so very much. It's turning into a saga of sorts, there's a second part, from Veronica's POV, and then a third I'm working on now, which is the smutty component. How smutty, I'm not yet sure, but who am I to question the muse, you know what I mean?
I particularly liked this passage:
“Thanks, you know, for…” She started crying, the emotion sudden and catching him off-guard. This time it was the quiet, pretty kind of tears-the ones that broke his heart as soon as they started falling. He wanted to hug her but couldn’t, and fidgeted instead-with his hands, feet, avoiding saying anything, repressing the urge to step into her, and hold her up, and say that everything was going to be okay, now, everything-
But that was too fairytale, no matter how much he’d been drinking. Instead he awkwardly mumbled “Don’t cry, Veronica,” which only seemed to make her cry harder.
The room was dark save for the light from the party and the pool below. She turned away from him, her hands wiping at her tears, and as she moved he could see her less and less. She became a shadow when she sat down on the bed. He stood there, watching her silhouette, wanting to speak but afraid to.
“I’m sorry, for…” Veronica’s voice was thick. “Beinglike this.”
“You should be,” he retorted before he could think. Angry, tear-filled eyes glared up at him in the darkness as he hurried to backtrack, “Not for being upset, Veronica. For letting him get you upset in the first place.”
Very real and spot on characterizations.
All in a all, a lovely treat. Thanks for posting!
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