Dear diary...
It's been so long since I last wrote my thoughts down in this form (then with pen and paper, though) that I don't really know how to begin. If I ever did - if memory serves me right, my childhood diaries were always quite awkward as attempts to record my private thoughts and feelings. Instead, it seemed like I always directed them to some (unknown) audience expecting praise and recognition of my early genius, including pseudo-philosophical thoughts and wordplays, that I might have thought clever.
Well, well. Some things never change. Luckily, this LiveJournal thing expects me to expect The Audience, so it seems I have the moral right to direct my words to "you, dear readers".
In case some of you, dear readers, missed the fact in my profile, I wish to stress that, English being not my native language, I will cheerfully accept all advice to help me to perfect my skills in it. Due to my studies, I read a lot of heavy English (and by some weird happenstance, most of the literature I manage to find time to involve myself with is also either not or poorly translated), but writing is a different matter. In this journal, I shall force myself to produce text, and then produce it some more, in English, in order to learn to do it fluently. After that, I shall write my (revolutionary) Master's thesis in English, become a world famous researcher and, hell, why not also a world famous fantasy or sci-fi or whatever author. Not entirely a joke, though I would probably be quite satisfied with either of the two.
Related to this subject, yesterday, while sitting in a bus I had an idea which has some potential to be one of the most glorious I ever had. If it works. If it could work. I'm still on the process of thinking what could possibly be wrong with it.
Ever heard of Dragonbane? It's supposedly the biggest live action role-playing event ever, with some thousand players, most of whom live around a week in the specifically built village, where everything (items, clothing, food, buildings - even songs and prayers) are as close to 'authentic' (it takes place in a fantasy world) as possible. Magic is going to be real - at least, real special effects to everything is promised - and the budget (and the number of collaborators) is enormous. Never heard of it? Well, it takes place in autumn 2005, in Estonia; www.dragonbane.org offers more information. This is all real and has, so far, nothing to do with me.
Now, I'm quite interested in this game and would like to participate, even if that requires more than a bit more effort than any 'ordinary' game. On the other hand, regarding the game with absolutely nothing off-game and thousand different people packed together as a kind of social experiment, I see a wonderful (or horrible, depending on the viewpoint) chance to observe what kind of effect this will have to these people. How do the (possibly intimate) relationships in the game feel? Is it truly possible to 'stay in the character' the whole time? All that.
Furthermore, writing another, somewhat smaller thesis (I have no idea what it's specifically called in English, if anything) some two years before the Master's thesis is not yet mandatory, but it's highly recommended. Next autumn would be an ideal time for me to start this thesis. So, I could do it of a subject that I'm genuinely interested in, I could find the motivation to sign up for the game and - if I could make my study interesting enough - I could get some name, at least in Finnish gamer circles, as an academic researcher in the field of role-playing games. I would only need to carry out a questionnaire to fellow players before and after the game (not everyone would wish to participate, but in this low a research level it wouldn't really matter) and perform some statistical analysis, write a couple of pages (some twenty or thirty should do fine) and be done with it. So far so good.
Few problems with that (otherwise brilliant) scheme. First of all, I'm not sure if I in the end wish to specialize in research of psychological side of role-playing games. Oh, that sure is interesting, but who wishes to pay me for doing it in a country this small? Of course, that little thesis, which only gains you three credits - even if I'm under an impression that one credit in Finnish university is worth more than one, say, in England, although the system is soon to be standardized all over the Europe - doesn't have to decide to what I will concentrate later on. It's customary, but it doesn't have to. As soon as the term begins, I'm going to discuss this with some of the professors and hear what they have to say.
Second 'problem' is the fact that this hypothetical study of mine smells too much of the social psychology, which is a major of it's own and even in a different faculty than psychology. Oh, I'm quite sure that I can construct it so that it fulfills the criteria of psychological experiment - or rather, study, since I conduct no real experiment, just gather the data. It will only require some thought and effort.
Then, the third and perhaps the most serious one. I have no particular wish whatsoever to try and prove that LARPing can be emotionally destructive, dangerous to one's psyche or anything alike. I see many dangers (emotional and otherwise) in this kind of game, and I can easily imagine how these dangers could become a fanatic argument against the hobby. Luckily, my thesis won't have this effect, as it will be (if it ever shall exist) placed in the archives of the department of psychology, where no one shall ever find it again. The thought bothers me still. If I accidentally would get some results, they might well be the results I wouldn't want to get. Would it not be dramatic to think that being a good scientist might harm my beloved hobby? Some problem. However, it may be that creators of Dragonbane will not look kindly at my little enterprise. I shall have to contact them.
My dearest readers still with me, you may have noticed that I have yet to reveal what specific aspect of the gaming experience my research shall concentrate. I must admit: I do not know, since it has only been a day since I first thought of this, and I have been busy reading Leahey's A History of Psychology - for I've got an exam coming. Also writing my LiveJournal.
Now, I shall depart to make some delicious food, and then to play some Knights of the Old Republic. And some ice cream would be nice.
Well, well. Some things never change. Luckily, this LiveJournal thing expects me to expect The Audience, so it seems I have the moral right to direct my words to "you, dear readers".
In case some of you, dear readers, missed the fact in my profile, I wish to stress that, English being not my native language, I will cheerfully accept all advice to help me to perfect my skills in it. Due to my studies, I read a lot of heavy English (and by some weird happenstance, most of the literature I manage to find time to involve myself with is also either not or poorly translated), but writing is a different matter. In this journal, I shall force myself to produce text, and then produce it some more, in English, in order to learn to do it fluently. After that, I shall write my (revolutionary) Master's thesis in English, become a world famous researcher and, hell, why not also a world famous fantasy or sci-fi or whatever author. Not entirely a joke, though I would probably be quite satisfied with either of the two.
Related to this subject, yesterday, while sitting in a bus I had an idea which has some potential to be one of the most glorious I ever had. If it works. If it could work. I'm still on the process of thinking what could possibly be wrong with it.
Ever heard of Dragonbane? It's supposedly the biggest live action role-playing event ever, with some thousand players, most of whom live around a week in the specifically built village, where everything (items, clothing, food, buildings - even songs and prayers) are as close to 'authentic' (it takes place in a fantasy world) as possible. Magic is going to be real - at least, real special effects to everything is promised - and the budget (and the number of collaborators) is enormous. Never heard of it? Well, it takes place in autumn 2005, in Estonia; www.dragonbane.org offers more information. This is all real and has, so far, nothing to do with me.
Now, I'm quite interested in this game and would like to participate, even if that requires more than a bit more effort than any 'ordinary' game. On the other hand, regarding the game with absolutely nothing off-game and thousand different people packed together as a kind of social experiment, I see a wonderful (or horrible, depending on the viewpoint) chance to observe what kind of effect this will have to these people. How do the (possibly intimate) relationships in the game feel? Is it truly possible to 'stay in the character' the whole time? All that.
Furthermore, writing another, somewhat smaller thesis (I have no idea what it's specifically called in English, if anything) some two years before the Master's thesis is not yet mandatory, but it's highly recommended. Next autumn would be an ideal time for me to start this thesis. So, I could do it of a subject that I'm genuinely interested in, I could find the motivation to sign up for the game and - if I could make my study interesting enough - I could get some name, at least in Finnish gamer circles, as an academic researcher in the field of role-playing games. I would only need to carry out a questionnaire to fellow players before and after the game (not everyone would wish to participate, but in this low a research level it wouldn't really matter) and perform some statistical analysis, write a couple of pages (some twenty or thirty should do fine) and be done with it. So far so good.
Few problems with that (otherwise brilliant) scheme. First of all, I'm not sure if I in the end wish to specialize in research of psychological side of role-playing games. Oh, that sure is interesting, but who wishes to pay me for doing it in a country this small? Of course, that little thesis, which only gains you three credits - even if I'm under an impression that one credit in Finnish university is worth more than one, say, in England, although the system is soon to be standardized all over the Europe - doesn't have to decide to what I will concentrate later on. It's customary, but it doesn't have to. As soon as the term begins, I'm going to discuss this with some of the professors and hear what they have to say.
Second 'problem' is the fact that this hypothetical study of mine smells too much of the social psychology, which is a major of it's own and even in a different faculty than psychology. Oh, I'm quite sure that I can construct it so that it fulfills the criteria of psychological experiment - or rather, study, since I conduct no real experiment, just gather the data. It will only require some thought and effort.
Then, the third and perhaps the most serious one. I have no particular wish whatsoever to try and prove that LARPing can be emotionally destructive, dangerous to one's psyche or anything alike. I see many dangers (emotional and otherwise) in this kind of game, and I can easily imagine how these dangers could become a fanatic argument against the hobby. Luckily, my thesis won't have this effect, as it will be (if it ever shall exist) placed in the archives of the department of psychology, where no one shall ever find it again. The thought bothers me still. If I accidentally would get some results, they might well be the results I wouldn't want to get. Would it not be dramatic to think that being a good scientist might harm my beloved hobby? Some problem. However, it may be that creators of Dragonbane will not look kindly at my little enterprise. I shall have to contact them.
My dearest readers still with me, you may have noticed that I have yet to reveal what specific aspect of the gaming experience my research shall concentrate. I must admit: I do not know, since it has only been a day since I first thought of this, and I have been busy reading Leahey's A History of Psychology - for I've got an exam coming. Also writing my LiveJournal.
Now, I shall depart to make some delicious food, and then to play some Knights of the Old Republic. And some ice cream would be nice.