meh
i really wish i could write something positive in here but everythings shit at the moment. im really starting to freak myself out over the head ache, just fearing the worst which isnt making it better at all. im so tired, its so bad now that i can fall asleep within seconds and wake up freaking out because i couldnt remember being that tired, worst thing is that its probably just in my head and nothing serious. so doctors appointment tomorrow at 2pm, i wonder what (s)he will ask and do, they better not bring up the anti-depressants or rather the lack of them. reminds me, we had to do some presentations in calss today and one of the groups had about depression, worst presentation ever, i got all paranoid thinking every one was just staring at me, bah. i need to relax more, my own part of my groups presentation was absolutely horrible, i dont know but this time around it was even worse than it usually is and its pretty bad when im not so spassed out. i literally stood for 30 s or more not knowing what to say, not because i couldnt phrase it: i had no clue what i was talking about, not like oh im confused and forgot something, i really forgot what our presentation was about. its so fucked up, its not even a very important project but i wanted to cry anyway. hanne tried to give me some advice afterwards and a lot said it was good, but i still freak out. i dont know what it is, i dont have a problem saying things when were in our seats but as soon as im up by the black board i freeze. i hate being judged by how i do orally because i have no control over myself at all, damn not being very social! pharmacology was okay, the assigment wasnt put online until yesterday, way to go when they expect us to prepare ourselves at home not to mention the assignment was about something we havent heard about (the lecture about is tomorrow). 3 lectures tomorrow, that should be easy.
im really really digging analytical chem, i actually understand it. i should probably have chosen chemistry and not pharmacy, hahaha. actually no, i like it here, small school and yeah. enough ranting about school for the time being.
i got swan lees second album today, i cant stop listening to i dont mind. i love that song. they have already received gold and the album was released this monday, 20.000 in 2 days is quite impressive if you ask me (although its not sold units but shipped units). the cover is bland though, a yellow background with a black butterfly on, kinda meh if you ask me. its almost 100% sure that ill be going to 2 of their concerts, that excites me! thatll be the 2nd and 3rd time i see them live, gleeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
dont know if i should go out friday, the running club at school is selling beers and stuff so i might get a few after looking at rat intestins for 4 hours *gags* you see we have to paint the lab coats for the new students this weekend, and i dont really feel like getting home at fuck knows when at night only to get up around 7 to go paint some lab coats. im looking forward to the painting never the less, a whole weekend not staying in is going to be brilliant even though itll be spend at school.
so yeah, still nothing exciting happening to me
[/pity rant]
im really really digging analytical chem, i actually understand it. i should probably have chosen chemistry and not pharmacy, hahaha. actually no, i like it here, small school and yeah. enough ranting about school for the time being.
i got swan lees second album today, i cant stop listening to i dont mind. i love that song. they have already received gold and the album was released this monday, 20.000 in 2 days is quite impressive if you ask me (although its not sold units but shipped units). the cover is bland though, a yellow background with a black butterfly on, kinda meh if you ask me. its almost 100% sure that ill be going to 2 of their concerts, that excites me! thatll be the 2nd and 3rd time i see them live, gleeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
dont know if i should go out friday, the running club at school is selling beers and stuff so i might get a few after looking at rat intestins for 4 hours *gags* you see we have to paint the lab coats for the new students this weekend, and i dont really feel like getting home at fuck knows when at night only to get up around 7 to go paint some lab coats. im looking forward to the painting never the less, a whole weekend not staying in is going to be brilliant even though itll be spend at school.
so yeah, still nothing exciting happening to me
[/pity rant]