Less the 24 hours and it hurts so bad.
Well, what can I say. It appears that one month earlier then expected Amanda is moving out. Yes folks that is right the bear cave is one light and a hell of lot more empty tonight.
See what happen was Kevin - the demon - came over on Thursday night. Amanda had this huge paper for her New Testament class due on Friday. The demon did not ask he just assumed that he could once again come over and spend the night. Asshole still hasnt shaken my hand.
So as the evening progressed, come to find out that in the process of trying to tell my wife the research goddess and paper princess how to do MLA formatting incorrectly - he decided to fuck up saving my daughter's paper. She melted down and he decided to retype in from memory. IT was trash. I managed to recover one paragraph of hers. The rest was corrupted and unsaveable.
I could not believe that she was turning this in. No endnotes, quoted the bible and nothing about in the works cited page let alone a footnote - 7 spelling and grammatical mistakes in the first paragraph alone. She told me & Christy that it was so much better then anything she could do and she turned it in.
So after she left for school and the demon came down, I, being the fatherly bull-bear that I am, told the demon that he was solely responsible for my daughter's grade. I further explained to him that he was going to be ruin of my baby and that she has lost all sense of self since the demon came around. Oh did I fail to mention, she decided to come back in the house for a "new pair of shoes" and heard it all. He stood in my house and smirked at me once to often so I told him not to darken my doorstep any longer. It seems however, that instead of realizing that I was talking to the demon and casting a particulary nasty exorcism spell with the "fear of me" incantation - Amanda took it that I was casting her out also.
She has decided to move into his hovel - no stove, no frig, eating only fast food for the next month. No way to do laundry, etc and so forth.
I cannot believe that I she is gone like this. I want so badly to apologize for this that it hurts me. Tangibly as I type this my cat is crying wondering what is wrong with his daddy. I however said nothing wrong to him. I talked firm and I talked plain - but I did not yell or scream. Even Christy is telling me that this was not a temper tantrum it was a father at his wits end.
I would move out and let her Christy keep my SSI every month to live on if she would come back here to safety. I know that on several occassions I have pulled the carpet out from under my family. Odin knows that I am trying to build life back solid this time. No more kid games - I am 40 and need to act like it.
She has been gone less then 24 hours and I am in so much pain ... I just want my baby back safe. What ever I have to do I will. What ever sacrifice I need to make I will. Christy and Amanda mean the world to me - I cant have them hurting.
A prayer----
Oh Great Odin, as you sit above with your wolves at your feet,
Send me the wisdom I need to be complete.
What would you do to save your child, fall on your sword,
run through fire, or leave for the wilds?
Oh Great Odin, I humbly pray that you send your Ravens on this day,
to guide my baby and keep her out of harms way.
Whether it been through blazing fire or freezing ice,
saving my child is worth any price.
Oh Great Odin, I come unto thee
and I ask for your help on bended knee.
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