Computer Industry Vs Auto Industry
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates
reportedly compared the computer industry with the
auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with
technology like the computer industry has,
we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars
that got 1000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors i
ssued a press release stating (by Mr Welch himself):
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft,
we would all be driving cars with the
following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash
twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the
road you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway
for no reason, and you would just accept this,
restart and drive on.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a
left turn, would cause your car to shut down and
refuse to restart, in case you would have to
reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car,
unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT."
But then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered
by the sun, reliable, five times as fast,
and twice as easy to drive, but would only
run on five per cent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator
warning lights would be replaced by a single
"general car default" warning light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the
same size butt.
9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?"
before going off.
10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever,
your car would lock you out and refuse to let
you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
handle, turned the key,
and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also
purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps
(now a GM subsidiary), even though they
neitherneed them nor want them.
Attempting to delete this option would immediately
cause the car's performance to diminish
by 50% or more. Moreover,
GM would become a target for investigation
by the Justice Department.
12. Every time GM introduced a new model,
car buyers would have to learn how to drive all
over again coz, none of the controls would
operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd press the "start" button to shut
off the engine.
...............................................................................
this joke i found humorous..
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting
on a fence and you shoot one of them,
how many will be left?" She calls on little Johnny.
"None, they all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4,
but I like your thinking."
Then Little Johnny says,
"I have a question for YOU.There are three women sitting
on a bench having ice cream. One is delicately licking
the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies,
"Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top
and sucked the cone."
"The correct answer is the one with the
wedding ring on...
.....but I like your thinking."
reportedly compared the computer industry with the
auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with
technology like the computer industry has,
we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars
that got 1000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors i
ssued a press release stating (by Mr Welch himself):
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft,
we would all be driving cars with the
following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash
twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the
road you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway
for no reason, and you would just accept this,
restart and drive on.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a
left turn, would cause your car to shut down and
refuse to restart, in case you would have to
reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car,
unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT."
But then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered
by the sun, reliable, five times as fast,
and twice as easy to drive, but would only
run on five per cent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator
warning lights would be replaced by a single
"general car default" warning light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the
same size butt.
9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?"
before going off.
10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever,
your car would lock you out and refuse to let
you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
handle, turned the key,
and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also
purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps
(now a GM subsidiary), even though they
neitherneed them nor want them.
Attempting to delete this option would immediately
cause the car's performance to diminish
by 50% or more. Moreover,
GM would become a target for investigation
by the Justice Department.
12. Every time GM introduced a new model,
car buyers would have to learn how to drive all
over again coz, none of the controls would
operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd press the "start" button to shut
off the engine.
...............................................................................
this joke i found humorous..
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting
on a fence and you shoot one of them,
how many will be left?" She calls on little Johnny.
"None, they all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4,
but I like your thinking."
Then Little Johnny says,
"I have a question for YOU.There are three women sitting
on a bench having ice cream. One is delicately licking
the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies,
"Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top
and sucked the cone."
"The correct answer is the one with the
wedding ring on...
.....but I like your thinking."