(no subject)
So I've been really depressed lately. My birthday is in a month and a half on April 24th and I'm hating every minute of its approach. I only have one good memory of my birthday. When I turned 11 I believe it was, it also happened to be take your daughter to work day. I went with my Aunt Laura (God rest her soul) to her work at the police station. I remember that she secretly set it up so all the girls with us would suprise me with birthday cupcakes and singing. I was so happy, that was the nicest thing family has ever done for me. I mean on my 'sweet sixteen' my mom forgot it was even my birthday, and at my 18th birthday party she got drunk. My Seventeenth was that last time I got a 6 a.m. phone call from my grandma just to say happy birthday. Lately everybody in my family is trying to get me to go back to my mom. I'm not fucking going, I'm sick of being tossed around by everyone, just passed along like something nobody wants. I'm done, I'm going to stay here with my friends because they never pushed me aside, they remember my birthday, and they never left me waiting for them for a couple days before they called two days after they said they would be there just to cancel without explaination. She had 18 years worth of chances. my brother in law is they only one telling me to stay where I am, he knows how much I hurt. He knew what my mom was doing, thats why he talked my sister into letting me stay there when my mom decided she wanted to move to FL. He said if him and Jessy hadn't had a baby that I would still be there.
This is to my friends:
I'm so lonely, but I don't want to go back, please don't leave me.
"Passive"
A PERFECT CIRCLE
“Dead as dead can be,” my doctor tells me
But I just can’t believe him, ever the optimistic one
I’m sure of your ability to become my perfect enemy
Wake up and face me, don’t play dead cause maybe
Someday I will walk away and say, “You disappoint me,”
Maybe you’re better off this way
Leaning over you here, cold and catatonic
I catch a brief reflection of what you could and might have been
It's your right and your ability
To become…my perfect enemy…
Wake up (we'll catch you) and face me (come one now),
Don’t play dead (don't play dead)
Cause maybe (because maybe)
Someday I’ll (someday I'll) walk away and say, “You disappoint me,”
Maybe you’re better off this way
Maybe you’re better off this way
Maybe you’re better off this way
Maybe you’re better off this way
You’re better of this; you’re better off this;
Maybe you’re better off!
Wake up (can't you) and face me (come on now),
Don’t play dead (don't play dead)
Cause maybe (because maybe)
Someday I’ll (someday I'll) walk away and say, “You fucking disappoint me!”
Maybe you’re better off this way
Go ahead and play dead
I know that you can hear this
Go ahead and play dead
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn and face me?
You fucking disappoint me!
Passive aggressive bullshit
This is to my friends:
I'm so lonely, but I don't want to go back, please don't leave me.
"Passive"
A PERFECT CIRCLE
“Dead as dead can be,” my doctor tells me
But I just can’t believe him, ever the optimistic one
I’m sure of your ability to become my perfect enemy
Wake up and face me, don’t play dead cause maybe
Someday I will walk away and say, “You disappoint me,”
Maybe you’re better off this way
Leaning over you here, cold and catatonic
I catch a brief reflection of what you could and might have been
It's your right and your ability
To become…my perfect enemy…
Wake up (we'll catch you) and face me (come one now),
Don’t play dead (don't play dead)
Cause maybe (because maybe)
Someday I’ll (someday I'll) walk away and say, “You disappoint me,”
Maybe you’re better off this way
Maybe you’re better off this way
Maybe you’re better off this way
Maybe you’re better off this way
You’re better of this; you’re better off this;
Maybe you’re better off!
Wake up (can't you) and face me (come on now),
Don’t play dead (don't play dead)
Cause maybe (because maybe)
Someday I’ll (someday I'll) walk away and say, “You fucking disappoint me!”
Maybe you’re better off this way
Go ahead and play dead
I know that you can hear this
Go ahead and play dead
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn and face me?
You fucking disappoint me!
Passive aggressive bullshit