(no subject)

[hiccup_]

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW BAD IT FEELS TO HAVE ONE OF YOUR BEST GUY FRIENDS WHO YOU COULD SEE YOURSELF WITH FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE NEVER WANT TO TALK, SEE OR HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN! YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH PAIN COMES FROM THE PHRASE "I HATE YOU"! YOU HAVE NO IDEA! I FUCKED UP BIG THIS TIME AND I CAN'T TAKE IT BACK! I COULD HAVE STOPPPED MYSELF BUT NO... I HAD TO GO AND FUCK THINGS UP ALOT MORE BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS NO BIG DEAL AND I COULD GET AWAY WITH IT! OUR KIND OF TATTERED FRIENDSHIP BEFORE WAS FIXABLE BUT NOW I'VE JUST GONE TOO FAR! AND I HATE IT WHEN I DO THIS! IT'S ALL MY FAULT.. YOU CAN'T ARGUE WITH THAT.

i wish i weren't so stupid and stubborn then maybe i could tell when im about to cross the line.. :(