"Language Barriers Do Not Apply" Chapter Five
Title: Language Barriers Do Not Apply
Chapter: 5/12
Fandom: Arashi
Character, Pairing(s): Matsumoto Jun/Zac Efron, Sho --> Jun
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Language, explicit sexual situations.
Summary: What had been a one-time thing has turned into ... not a one-time thing. And they aren't the only ones involved.
Something might have been lost in the translation, but Zac was quickly figuring out that Jun wasn't going to be introducing him as anything other than a friend, at least not any time soon. As soon as they'd gotten back to Arashi's green room, Zac had been ambushed by Ninomiya, who seemed to be speaking in rather speedy Japanese on purpose to mess with him.
Jun kept his distance, and although Zac's heart was beating a mile a minute from what had happened in the bathroom, he did his best to act casual. The group's leader, Ohno, invited him (and by default, Jun) out to dinner with him and Nino. The one Zac had dubbed the 'crazy one' in his mind, Aiba, had already left, and Sho hadn't returned either.
It had been a chance encounter on the street, but it seemed that Sakurai Sho was not only the one who'd been sneaking around with Jun's phone but had been the person he'd bumped into on the street months earlier when he was last in Japan. Zac wasn't sure what to think of the guy. During the show filming, Sho had seemed anything but a bad guy. Even though Zac only picked up a few words every sentence, Sho had done the majority of the speaking during the filming, interviewing the guest and providing introductions for different segments. Underneath that professional exterior, though, who was the real Sakurai Sho?
Zac couldn't help noticing the awkwardness between Jun and his band mate during the dancing segment. Even from the broadcast booth it was obvious that something was going on there. But none of the other Arashi members seemed to be acting curious about it since the filming hadn't stopped or been commented on. Even in the green room, everyone had been chatting amiably.
But Zac couldn't get his mind off of Sho now that he'd seen him in person. The guy, for all he appeared the professional actor on set, had nearly ruined his vacation. Sure, it was an issue between Jun and Sho, but it affected Zac's life too.
He was brought out of his thoughts by Ninomiya's arm linked through his. “Sashimi for Hollywood boy!”
Jun rolled his eyes, muttering something about Nino wanting Zac and his 'gold card' and the three of them laughed. Too bad he hadn't brought his dictionary with from his hotel room. He smiled obligingly and let Nino drag him from the room, Ohno and Jun following behind. They crammed into a cab, and he was stuck between Ohno and Nino while Jun sat up front. Despite their earlier closeness, Jun was definitely playing it cool.
Maybe it was the post-filming giddiness, but Zac immediately noticed that Ohno and Nino were awfully affectionate. Even with him in the middle, Nino was continuously stretching a hand back to ruffle Ohno's hair or poke at him with his shoe. He looked to the front seat, and Jun was staring out the window as the cab drove them through the night to the Shibuya ward. Zac had never been this close with his friends - he wasn't sure what to make of the relationship amongst the Arashi members. Then again, he hadn't been in a group with the same four guys for ten years like they had.
The cab pulled up, and Nino tugged on him again. Ohno and Jun went on ahead, and they walked to a rear entrance. Luckily, one of them must have called ahead as they were led to a private room in the back of the restaurant. Even in this wealthier district, the restaurant had thin paper walls separating them, and Zac's ears were overwhelmed with the sounds of so many different voices chattering away on the main restaurant floor.
Ohno and Nino were nearly sitting on top of one another on one end of the booth while Jun sat at a comfortable distance beside him, his eyes scanning the menu. Zac didn't know what to say. Even if he did know what to say, making sure all three of his table mates understood him would be nearly impossible. So he just looked at the room décor, whatever kana he recognized on the menu and wondered when he'd get to be alone with Jun again. It was hard to sit next to him and not be able to do or say anything since they were in mixed company.
Sake arrived, and he and Jun reached for the flask at the same time. Zac nearly jumped from his skin at the contact, but Ohno and Nino were too busy holding the menu between them to notice. Jun looked slightly flustered but waved Zac away. “I'll serve you,” he said quietly.
He hoped that the warmth of the room would explain away the blush he felt rising into his cheeks. If not, the alcohol would do a good job of it. Zac wasn't altogether fond of sake. He'd spent plenty of time puking it back up when he'd been in Japan the last time, thankfully when Jun wasn't around.
They placed their orders as Zac sipped the strong liquor. Ohno, who was already quiet enough as it was, said something about getting a bit of everything for Zac to try. He'd been very kind so far. It was pretty obvious that Ohno looked out for people in his own humble way. English wasn't the strongest suit for any of the three men at the table, but it wasn't as if Zac was an experienced Japanese speaker. But they tried for his sake.
“What...happening tomorrow?” Nino asked, reaching to refill Ohno's cup. Zac actually hadn't thought that far. He and Jun hadn't done a whole lot of talking, and as much as Zac wanted to spend as much time with him as possible, he knew that Jun had plenty of obligations.
So it surprised him when Jun interrupted. “Signed up...myself and Zac. Tokyo Bay boat tour.” Jun looked to him sheepishly. “Chance...did not get chancc...”
Zac understood, feeling the warmth in his cheeks deepen. “That would be great. Thank you so much.” He found himself unable to look away from Jun, who seemed to be studying him rather intently. Their table companions were half sitting on each other and yet he and Jun had to keep their distance. Jun's fingers were tapping out an erratic rhythm on his seat, as if he was fixing to close that distance, the others be damned, but Zac knew he hadn't had enough to drink for that yet. Fearing what Ohno and Nino would think, he turned to them and smiled, trying to find the words in Japanese this time.
“Thought I would be walking by myself...Matsumoto-sama takes good care of...” Well, maybe he'd had more sake than he thought as Nino nearly fell over laughing, and Jun looked rather embarrassed. “What? What did I say?”
“You called him Matsumoto-sama,” Ohno pointed out, seemingly unmoved by it as the server returned with a large serving plate and smaller plates, as well as soy sauce for dipping the raw fish.
“I meant...” Zac fumbled over the words, and Nino just kept laughing.
“He's learning!” Jun replied huffily. “Don't be a prat.”
“...probably paid Zac-san to call him that,” Nino said quickly, and Zac was able to translate that easily enough.
Everyone laughed amiably, and Zac did his best to keep up with the others' drinking, much as he'd probably be hurling all through the boat ride the following day. The food wasn't what Zac was used to, but it was really good, and he would never have been able to eat like this on his own wandering the streets as a tourist. This was a place for locals, not Americans on press tours.
Nino and Ohno had to excuse themselves first since they were apparently filming a segment for one of Arashi's many variety shows the following morning and had to make an early train. Zac felt great relief at their departure despite enjoying their company. Now he and Jun would get to spend time together, just the two of them. Although Zac wasn't sure just where that sort of time would lead.
The other two left, Jun making a big deal about picking up the check despite Ohno's insistence. They were just about to start a conversation, ideally about what their post-dinner plans were when the server slid open the door and bowed humbly to Jun. They spoke in rapid fire Japanese, and Zac had been drinking way too much at that point to follow along.
Jun turned to him apologetically. “Chef's daughter...big fan of Arashi. Food on...” Jun searched for the right words. “Food on the house if I greet...”
“Go,” Zac waved, unable to suppress a laugh. “Go on, I can't leave without you.” Which was true since he probably would have difficulty leaving on his own power. He sighed as Jun departed with the server, and the sliding panel closed again. He was alone as Jun's phone on the table pinged with a text message.
A few moments passed, and Jun still hadn't returned. The phone pinged with another message. Zac was growing antsy. Someone was definitely trying to get a hold of Jun. What if it was urgent? What if it was his family? Maybe it was his concern for Jun or maybe it was his alcoholic buzz that made him pick up the phone when it rang.
“Hello, this is Jun's phone,” he slurred, and some part of his mind was screaming that this was a really bad decision. Hadn't this just happened behind Jun's back before?
The line was quiet, and he said hello again but this time in Japanese. There was a voice over the line, and Zac's pulse quickened. “Uh hello, this is Sho.”
“Jun is busy right now,” he said, remembering all too well being on the other side of something like this just days earlier. “Can I pass along a message?” he fired back quickly in English, feeling more and more vindictive for some reason.
He heard Sho breathing on the other end. “I can call back.”
Zac smarted at Sho's flawless English, and he tightened his grip on the cell phone. “Listen, I don't want to do this on the phone.” Do what, he asked himself as his words came faster than the thoughts to back them up. “I want to talk to you. In person.” He did? What the hell was the sake doing to his brain?
“That's probably not-”
“It's clear that we're both Jun's friends,” Zac said back, knowing that Sho had probably just been concerned for Jun earlier. Why else answer a friend's phone? Zac was answering now for the same reason, wasn't he? “So I want to clear the air.”
“I don't think we should do that.”
“Why? You afraid I'd tell Jun about that night I ran into you? Just what were you doing there, huh?”
The line was so silent that Zac thought Sho had hung up. “Very well. When shall we meet?” Sho sounded like he was using that presenter voice of his, calm and controlled, while Zac knew he sounded like some jealous lunatic.
“Tonight,” Zac said before he realized what that meant. “We meet tonight. You know where my hotel is. I'm sure you remember.” Sho's silence was acknowledgment enough. “11 PM.”
“11 PM. Goodbye.”
The line went dead, and Zac realized the magnitude of what he'd just done. He was supposed to be with Jun tonight, wasn't he? And now he'd just invited Sakurai Sho to his hotel room? He stared at the cell phone for a few seconds, blinking in his horror. He'd done the same thing to Jun that Sho had. How was he any better?
His fingers clicked through the phone, and he felt like a complete jerk as he deleted Sho's texts and received call. Jun would never find out this time. He'd set the record straight with Sho, and then he and Jun could spend time together without any weirdness. That would be the best, right? Jun wouldn't have to be hurt any longer, right?
Zac's doubts grew as he set the phone back where Jun left it. He downed another tiny cup full of sake and was already feeling sick to his stomach when the sliding panel opened and an anxious looking Jun returned.
“Sorry I...I took a long time. Shall we go?”
Zac knew they had the boat ride the following day, and then two more guaranteed days of vacation. Once this bit with Sho was talked out, they'd have plenty of time together, wouldn't they? Zac held his stomach and gave Jun a sad gaze. “I think...I do not think the sashimi agrees with my stomach.”
Jun looked disappointed, pocketing his phone with a sigh. “I am sorry. Raw fish...not for all people,” he muttered in English. “Let me...call a taxi.”
Zac nodded, willing the guilt to go away. He had two hours before Sho would arrive at his hotel. Cold shower, definitely. He accepted Jun's help as he stumbled from the restaurant, trying not to wince as Jun affectionately rubbed his arm on the cab ride back to the Hyatt.
------
He shouldn't be nervous.
By all accounts, he shouldn't be anything- he was going to the Grand Hyatt Tokyo, to the room number that had been burned in his brain since last week, tasting like guilt and betrayal and his own stupidity. It didn't mean anything, because there wasn't anything it could mean- or so he kept telling himself over and over during the car ride, even as he got out of the car and made his way up through the lobby.
He'd stuck a baseball cap on to hide himself; the last thing Johnny needed was a scandal about him going to some girl's hotel room. And even worse if he found out the truth- how could Sho even explain that? "Sorry, Johnny, I got a call that I needed to meet Jun's possible boyfriend for an old-fashioned rumble in the hotel hallway?"
Sho shook his head. It didn't mean anything.
But the elevator ride felt like it took forever.
No one was in the corridor when he departed the elevator and let the doors slide closed behind him with a resounding 'ping'. There was a moment- only a brief one- where he considered just leaving and not showing up, After all, what could Zac do? Jun couldn't know what was going to happen, he couldn't know what Zac had asked for- who would he tell?
But something kept Sho's feet glued to the floor, and he wasn't sure what it was. He walked to the room and rapped his knuckles on the door before he lost his nerve again. It took awhile to answer; stupid, Zac had to know who it was, unless he'd ordered room service to greet Sho with.
When the door opened, Sho wasn't sure what to expect. Zac just leveled him with a hard look- his hair was a bit wet, and curling around the edges. He'd clearly showered since leaving wherever he and Jun had gone. There was a long moment, and then he stepped aside, allowing Sho to enter.
It wasn't entirely a good sign. Whatever was going to happen wasn't fit for the hallway- or at least Zac didn't expect it to be. Sho just walked in with a glare of his own. He wouldn't make any falsehoods about liking the American; there was obviously no love lost between them.
Zac didn't say anything- he just let Sho loiter awkwardly near the door, and leaned back against the fake mahoghany desk against the wall, beneath the mirror. He folded his arms across his chest and stared at his feet, crossed at the ankles.
"Well, you brought me here," Sho said, mostly out of necessity because nothing else was being done. "What is it that you wanted?"
"I told you," Zac said, still glaring at his socks. "Clear the air."
"About what?"
"About what you did," the American spat, finally looking angry. "And why."
Sho took a deep breath. He was starting to get mad- the guy had no idea what their lives were like, no idea how hectic, how stressful. He didn't know what made their group work, or their shows a success. He didn't know Johnny, or the industry, or even them- not even Jun, not that well. And yet he was standing there on a pedastal, on a horse, thinking he knew everything and could pass judgments on ten years of togetherness, on ten years of being in Arashi.
"Because I know what the cost is," Sho said, finally, through clenched teeth. "And I know what the consequences are."
"And you think you can just make those decisions for another person?" Zac replied. His arms uncrossed, and he looked agitated- nervous. Full of energy.
"Sometimes someone has to," Sho hissed. "Someone outside the situation."
"It's never your decision to make!" Zac cried. "And even if you have something to say, you don't do it like that- you don't do it backhandedly, behind their back."
"And you are so much better," Sho said, laughing derisively. "Didn't you do the same thing to get me here?"
Zac flushed, and Sho knew he had hit a nerve; it was one, at least, that he had managed to score. His palms were sweaty and his fingers were stiff, and he tried to work out the tension by unclenching them at his sides.
"Yes," the American admitted, finally. "I did. And I'm not proud of it. But you- you didn't just hurt him, you know. You affected me, and my plans."
"Your plans?" Sho asked, astounded. "You would know a lot about ruining plans."
Zac didn't seem to understand that one. He just gave Sho an incredulous look.
"Yes, I would," he stated. "Because you did a very good job."
"It's not about you," Sho said.
"It's always been about me!" Zac exclaimed. "It's me that you have the problem with, isn't it? It's me that you don't like, me that you want gone. It's not him- it's all about me."
"About what you are doing to him, then," Sho clarified.
"How about what you are doing to me, huh?" the other man said. "How about all the things you say aren't about me that are affecting me. Affecting me, and my life, and my plans."
Sho shook his head.
"That's not import-"
"Don't try to tell me what is important and what isn't!" Zac interrupted. He was speaking quicker, his words clipping; it was harder to understand when he got worked up. Sho was good, but when his own blood was boiling, it was much more difficult to concentrate on. "You have no right to say that!"
"And you have no right to come in here and change everything!" Sho fired back. He had taken a step forward without even realizing he had moved, and out of the corner of his eye, he could see his reflection in the mirror. His skin was flushed. He looked out of his mind.
"Change what?" Zac cried. "I didn't change anything!"
"You changed everything!"
Zac took a step backwards, and something on his face cleared- realization. He laughed, just a bit, like the one breath before admitting something on the tip of the tongue that comes out in a rush, in a giddy, uncontrollable mess.
"You-" he stopped, a hand moving to his mouth, to half cover his lips. It was the change in tension, the shifting in control. "Are you in love with him?"
Sho's blood was cold. Something was stuck in his throat, and he couldn't swallow.
"What?" he managed to choke out. "What- no. No."
But Zac just kept looking at him, staring at him with eyes too blue to be real, and it felt like something was slowly sinking that needed desperately to be kept afloat.
"It's business," Sho said. "It's a risk. And I know you don't understand, but that's what it is. He's going to hurt himself. He's going to fuck everything up, don't you see? His career, our group- everything."
"No," Zac said, slowly, shaking his head. One hand had moved to the top of the desk, like an anchor. "No, you didn't answer my question."
"Because I don't need to," Sho spat.
"Maybe not," Zac said.
There was a long moment in which neither spoke, and Sho struggled to right his breath. It felt like someone had their foot on his chest, pressing against his lungs; he couldn't find the air he needed. The room had gotten very hot, and he hadn't noticed it. His face was burning, his hands sticky.
"Do you get it now?" Sho asked, fighting to regain some semblance of control on his surroundings. "You can't let him ruin everything. It's not just him- it's all of us. I can't let you ruin that. Do you see? Do you get it?"
"Yes," Zac said, a breath, really, just a gasp of air. The sides of his mouth were still curved up, like he was enjoying a sick joke that no one else could hear.
"Good," Sho said. He jammed his hands roughly into his jacket pockets. "Then don't continue this. Don't give him the chance to destroy everything we've worked so hard for."
He stalked from the room, and Zac didn't call out to him. He didn't say anything, he didn't do anything; he just let Sho leave. And even though Sho had gotten the last word, even though he knew from the weight in his stomach that everything he'd said was right, everything was true-
-he still felt like he'd lost as he pressed the button in the elevator to go back down to the lobby.
And he didn't know why.
------
Jun had gone to sleep frustrated the night before. He probably should have known better than asking Zac to eat sashimi and drink sake, especially at the speed Leader drank. Zac had looked miserable when he brought him back to the hotel, and now he was making him get on a lunch cruise boat?
Well, the money was nothing. They could go anywhere really, since Jun had nothing until a promotional photo shoot in the early evening. It was nice to have the day hours off for a change. He was surprised to see Zac looking rather healthy and refreshed when he picked him up in the morning. “Feeling better?” Jun asked as the driver held the door for the sedan open.
Zac didn't even ask questions about their transportation as he slid onto the leather seat. Celebrities were used to being carted around no matter what part of the world it was. “Yes, much better actually...once I threw up.”
Jun nodded. “I'm sorry. You did not...not as...” He frowned, wishing he'd spent more time practicing English. But then again, his best tutor wasn't exactly the person he wanted to consult with in this instance. “You did not have to drink so much with us.”
Zac waved him off. “No, no. It was fun.” The car pulled away from the hotel, and Zac fidgeted a little. “Can we...” he continued in English. “Can we talk?”
“Oh, yes.” Japan was just as gossip obsessed as the United States, but since Johnny's were so recognizable, they had recommended companies for these sort of situations. He inclined his head at the driver, separated from them by glass anyhow. “Paid not to talk or listen. Probably no English.”
This seemed to pacify him. “I'm sorry about last night,” Zac said quietly. “Sorry we didn't get to...”
Jun felt his skin grow warm at the implication in Zac's words. He was sorry too. There was only today and tomorrow left for this visit, and Jun would be out the whole evening tonight for the shoot. He ran a hand through his hand nervously. “We have time.” He couldn't help reverting to his native language. “We'll figure things out as we go.”
Zac seemed to get the basic idea, and his skin flushed a bit. It would be difficult to get through the entire boat ride without acting as more than friends. It had been hard to keep his hands off of the other man in the bathroom the night before, but Jun was enough of a clean freak that he'd prefer to avoid that sort of thing in the future. The car managed to get them from Zac's hotel to the boat docks within half an hour.
None of the folks milling around seemed to recognize them. Jun kept sunglasses and a baseball cap on while Zac kept the hood of his sweatshirt pulled up. They claimed their tickets and boarded, making their way to the top deck. It was looking like rain, and this ride cruised Tokyo Bay for a good two hours. Maybe if they stayed up on deck fewer people would bother them.
“Wait, wait,” Zac said as Jun headed away from the rail to find a seat. “Pose there.” Rainbow Bridge was visible in the background. It was probably a good shot for a foreigner to get.
As Zac pulled his digital camera from his pocket, he spoke without thinking. “Sho has a camera just like that.” He saw Zac tense up immediately, and Jun felt like an idiot. The last person they needed to think about today was Sho, and Jun had already thought of him twice now. He leaned against the rail and tried to strike a cool pose. It would be practice for that evening anyhow. Zac snapped the photo quietly, holding it out for Jun to get one of him.
Zac sat on the rail, balancing easily, and Jun tried not to let his hands shake as he took the picture. Idiot, he chastised himself. Stupid. The captain announced the boat's imminent departure and only a few older people had joined them up on the deck as a drizzling mist started to fall. They took seats near the rear of the boat where the fewest people had gathered.
Jun remembered that Zac was still a tourist, and he got up several times to take photos of skyscrapers and other sites in the bay. There was another announcement from the captain that meals would be served below decks in a few minutes. “Lunch?” he asked after about the twentieth time Zac got up.
“I...” Zac said as he sat back down at his side, and their thighs touched. Jun felt the other man's body heat, and even with the misty rain, it was hard to not do anything. He reached out a hand, brushing Zac's bangs away from his forehead. His hood wasn't doing a good job keeping the front of his hair dry. “I'm not really hungry.”
Jun nodded, taking off his sunglasses and shoving them in his pocket. “Me neither.” He got to his feet, swaying a bit as the boat was now in the choppier waters of the bay. Not having the words for it, just going on gut feeling, he started to walk. By now the deck was abandoned as the older folks had gone down for the lunch they'd all paid for. He licked his lips, making it to the empty stairwell between the decks and out of the rain and removed his hat.
He could hear glasses clinking and people chatting away down below. Jun turned, leaning back against the rail, and sure enough, Zac had followed him. The American smiled, making the first move in this instance, going straight for Jun's mouth with his own. Zac made a pleased, low sound deep in his throat, and this only spurred Jun on. He shoved at the other man's hood, pushing it back so he could run his fingers through the messy, light strands. In his enthusiasm, his rings got a bit caught in Zac's hair, and his companion showed his displeasure by nipping Jun's bottom lip hard.
“You're rough, High School Musical,” he commented, brushing his fingers along Zac's jawline.
Zac worked his hands under Jun's rain dampened shirt, warm fingers like electricity up and down the cool skin of his stomach. They were in such a hurry to feel and touch that their noses kept bopping against one another, and Jun could only laugh quietly against Zac's mouth. Jun couldn't keep from gasping as the other man ran his fingers along his belt, moving up and in to run teasingly along the stretchy waistband of his boxers.
“You brought me here, Hana Yori Dango.”
It was a bit harder for Jun to get his hands under the sweatshirt and button-down of his companion, and his frustration increased. The last thing he needed was to lose control now. “Still an hour left,” Jun reminded Zac as his fingers dipped lower to find the bare skin of Jun's hips. One more hour of the boat swaying on the waves while old people spoke about the gaudy new buildings going up.
Zac kissed roughly along Jun's jaw and breathed heavy in his ear. “Bathroom?”
Jun rolled his eyes. It seemed that Zac didn't have the same issues in that regard. Reluctantly, he detangled his limbs from Zac's, leaning his forehead against his. “No way.”
Zac's breathing was coming in gasps as he took his hands back. “You're a tease, Matsumoto.”
He pulled Zac's hood back up and kissed him once more, lingering more than he should have since voices were growing closer. “I'm sorry.” He dug around his mind for the English, and it was harder to focus since Zac was still pressed up against him, and it was quite clear that Zac wanted him just as badly. “We go...back to hotel unless you have more...sightseeing?”
Zac pulled away and bounded back up the steps with a wry smile. “I can see Tokyo later tonight instead.” They sat back on the bench on the top deck, closer than they had to, and even the chilly mist wasn't enough to cool Jun's ardor. It would be the longest hour of his life.
------
The ride back to the hotel felt like it took a lifetime, buildings flashing by outside. Zac kept his fingers tapping against the leather of the seats nervously, unable to stop the habit; his nerves were still on overdrive, though the majority of it was now from anxiety and not from arousal. Everything was catching up around him- the weight of what they were doing, the severity, and how much he desperately craved it, it all wrapped around his thoughts and refused to let go.
As they neared the drop-off station outside the lobby of the Grand Hyatt, Jun shifted, moving his hand so that his pinky rested against Zac's own. A slight movement, and their pinkies were entwined- Zac smiled against the palm of his other hand, keeping his gaze out the window, where it was safer. At least he wasn't the only one feeling everything; at least he wasn't the only one who was nervous. The gesture was reassuring, and dispelled a few of the knots that had taken up residence in his stomach.
They stayed silent during the elevator ride up to the fourth floor.
"This is it," he joked, opening the door with the key card and pushing it aside. "Life of luxury."
He was half-babbling, because he wasn't sure what else to say. Jun looked around like he cared what the inside of the room looked like, taking in all the details- it was interesting the way his eyes always flickered over everything, like he was taking notes. Zac was fairly certain that he could recite specifics if asked later, once gone; probably about anything, acting included. It was just one of the things that was so intriguing about the other man.
Jun turned, a half-smile ghosting across his features.
"It's nice," he said, in English. "Very- open."
It was space-filler, nerve-helper; they just looked at each other for a long moment, and then they met in the middle, both moving at once. It wasn't very coordinated, not really; not when Jun missed Zac's mouth, a bit, to hit the corner of his lips instead. But it was frenzied, rougher- a pace they hadn't been able to reach yet. It struck Zac, vaguely, like a thought floating around through the haze he was currently in, that it was the first time that they had really been alone since the first time they'd met, and even that was just in a hallway. It spurned him onward, and he dug his hands into Jun's hair, trying to pull him closer still.
Jun moaned into his mouth, which alighted a ping of nerves down Zac's spine that settled in his abdomen, like hot coals. He nipped at Zac's bottom lip- retribution for earlier on the boat ride, no doubt- and his hands worked their way under his sweatshirt. He couldn't quite get to the buttons of Zac's button-down with the material in the way. He pulled back, kissing Zac's jawline as he tugged on the offending article.
"Off," he breathed, against Zac's earlobe. "Now."
It was impossible to disobey him, when he took that tone. Zac tore the sweatshirt off, throwing it somewhere on the opposite side of the room, near the corner. Then Jun's hands were on his shirt, pulling at the buttons impatiently, his mouth hot against Zac's neck again. It was heady just to run his hands through Jun's hair, to let his fingers tangle in the wisps at the back of his neck. Jun was having trouble with the buttons, and made a noise of frustration in the back of his throat, pressing their bodies together. The friction resulting as the denim of their jeans ground against the other made him gasp.
It occured to him as he threw his head back- allowing Jun more access to the sensitive skin of his jawline- that they were still standing in the middle of the hotel room when there was a bed not a foot away, covered with an odd-floral comforter. He tugged at Jun, distracting him from the buttons of his shirt, only to meet his mouth again- it was demanding. They stumbled backwards, Zac's calf hitting the side of the mattress before he fell onto it.
Jun's weight was incredibly arousing. Zac let his fingers slip below the waistband of his jeans, skimming across the skin, and was pleased when the other man arched his back up into the touch, groaning.
Jun mumbled something that Zac couldn't catch against his mouth- the Japanese was too slurred, too breathy for him to understand, but he got the general idea. Zac kissed him, hard, and moved one hand from the other man's waist to slide across the skin of his neck again. Jun gave a little gasp every time Zac's fingers grazed his jaw, his ear, and so Zac kept doing it, pulling himself away from Jun's lips to kiss his collarbone. Jun's shirt was getting in the way.
"Here," Jun said, in English, which Zac appreciated, because he was having trouble trying to find the Japanese for the words he wanted. Jun sat up and shrugged out of his shirt, and Zac didn't give him the opportunity to move back down. He sat up, hands on Jun's waist, to kiss his navel, working his way down to the bones of his hips. The other man jerked a bit, hands reaching down to grasp Zac's shoulders tightly- Zac could almost feel the muscles in his arms twitching, alert. He kissed Jun's skin just above his jeans, and the other man moaned, catching the noise halfway by biting down on his lower lip.
Zac, a surge of adrenaline rushing through his veins, took the opportunity to flip the other man to his back, straddling his thighs. It was easy to lean forward and kiss him again, especially when Jun's eyes got wide- with his arms splayed against the pillows, it was incredibly alluring.
Jun bit his lip, hard- Zac tasted a sting of bitter copper on his tongue as he swept it across their joined mouths, and he swallowed his own groan of frustration. He rocked his hips against Jun's waist, running one hand down the other man's chest with more force than was necessary. He was almost painfully aroused, and the action only made it that much worse- he repeated it, fumbling with the button and zipper of Jun's jeans, hardly aware of what his own hands were doing. He just knew he wanted more, more heat, more friction.
"Ah," Jun breathed, pulling away from Zac's mouth as Zac slid his hand under the denim covering his waist. He was already hard; he gasped sharply when Zac ran his hand along his length, arching under his palm. His fingernails dug into Zac's shoulders, and it didn't hurt- not really. Zac rocked his hips forward, trying to satiate his own growing need, even as he sped up the rate in which his hand was moving on Jun's cock.
The rhythm was quick, rushed. Jun let out another gasp, lips parted, and Zac moved forward to cover Jun's mouth with his own. The other man tasted like sweat, like a hint of green tea. Zac's fingers closed around Jun's member, and Jun groaned, throatily, against his lips.
Jun's hands were so tense around Zac's shoulders, and Zac momentarily removed his hand to pull the other man's jeans all the way off his hips. They were tight, and they stuck, and he had to fully sit up to do it, pushing upwards to yank them down Jun's thighs.
When he bent down again, he kissed Jun's stomach, working across the taut skin there. His arms were shaking, and he didn't think it was from muscle strain.
"I-" he started, looking up. "I've never-"
"Me either," Jun gasped. Some of Zac's nervousness disappeared, and he moved his hand back down to stroke Jun's cock again. When his fingertips grazed the head, Jun moaned, and the sound itself was enough to spur Zac onward. He slid down Jun's body to take his cock in his mouth.
Jun let out a hiss, muscles jerking. One hand tightened around the blanket and the other moved to roughly tangle in Zac's hair, like a guide, like an upsoken demand. It was heady.
It wasn't difficult to fall into the rhythm. Just the sounds Jun was making were enough to keep Zac's own arousal strong- little mews, breathy moans, pants that caught in his chest. The tension of Jun's hand pulling on his hair- Zac could swirl his tongue to ellicit them all, could change the position of his hand at the base. He could feel Jun's stomach muscles contract, feel his legs twitch. Then the hand in his hair tightened painfully, twisting, and Jun came with a jolt and a hitching groan.
Zac shifted as Jun's breathing began to even out, wiping at his chin with the back of his hand. The fingers in his hair momentarily relaxed, and then tightened again, pulling him up for a rough kiss. The motion caused their bodies to grind together, and Zac couldn't stop the gasp, especially not when Jun's free hand slid down his chest, to his stomach, to the waistband of his jeans.
"Jun," he choked out, when the other man's mouth left his to kiss his neck. "You-"
"Shut up," Jun demanded, unbuttoning Zac's pants.
"You-" Zac tried again, ignoring the command, unable to get any other word off the tip of his tongue. He wanted to tell Jun that he didn't have to, that he wasn't obligated to, but it was all the more difficult when Jun's fingers curled around the base of his cock.
"Yes," Jun said, against Zac's collarbone, where he was raining kisses across his shoulders. He pushed the fabric of Zac's shirt down his arms. The air felt like a shock against his bare skin, but the building friction from Jun's hand made it hard to focus on anything else.
Jun moved, mouth making hot trails down until it overlapped his fingers, nestled around Zac's shaft. The explosion of heat, the softness of his lips, the ringing knowledge that it was Jun, it was Jun- Zac moaned, bucking his hips up against the warmth, unable to stop himself.
He could feel Jun's grin, but it meant nothing compared to his mouth working up and down on his cock. He threw his arms to either side to grab a hold of the pillows there, squeezing tightly, trying desperately to hold on longer. It was so much, too much, and the pressure was already building in his abdomen.
The rhythm escalated, and he rocked his hips to meet it, powerless to do otherwise. Fingers curled around his base, and then moved to splay across his stomach, to claw at the skin. A groan caught in the back of his mouth, choking him.
"Fuck," he gasped. "Fuck, Jun-"
The orgasm rippled through him like waves, wrenching a moan and Jun's name again from his lips. His muscles jerked, and when they finally stilled, Jun's hand moved to his chest, to his shoulder, like a gentle reminder of where he was.
His weight shifted, and Zac opened his eyes only to grab the sides of Jun's face and kiss him- he couldn't think of anything else he wanted to do. He opened his mouth, demanding access, and Jun's hands curled around his wrists, his arms, and-
-Jun's phone rang.
Jun pulled away, confused for a second, obviously trying to discern what was going on. Then he jumped, springing into action as he started looking for where his jeans had ended up on the floor.
"Shit," he hissed, in Japanese, tearing through the pockets in the denim until he found the offending device. "Hello?"
Zac couldn't hear the other side of the conversation, and Jun didn't say much- mostly "I understand"'s and "I'm sorry"'s. When he hung up, he looked worried.
"I'm late," he explained, throwing his clothing back on and running his hands through his hair. Once dressed, he knelt on the bed, kissing Zac chastely. "I'll call you when the shoot is done."
Then he was gone, and Zac just watched him go, the door clicking shut behind him.
------
"You know, we could go anywhere to eat," Sho commented, and Aiba just gave him a wide grin, picking up his chopsticks and knocking them together twice.
"But I like ramen," he said, lifting up the noodles as if to explain. Sho shook his head, staring down at his own steaming bowl. He hadn't been hungry for much lately, and after last night- well, his appetite hadn't managed to come back at all yet. It would have been rude to turn down Aiba's invitation to join him for dinner, and he couldn't really explain why he would have without lying. He'd done too much of that lately.
"I called Jun, too, but he didn't answer," Aiba sighed, through a mouth full of ramen.
"He's with Zac," Sho said, without thinking, before he could bite it back. Across the table, his bandmate blinked, and then nodded, as if remembering that Jun had a guest for the next few days. "He's probably busy showing him around Tokyo."
"Right," Aiba said, and laughed. When Sho eyed him, Aiba just shrugged a little bit, as if apologizing in his own way. "I just- Tokyo, right."
Since Sho never really understood the majority of Aiba's abrupt mood changes, he let it go, taking a bite of his ramen. Even the small bite tasted a bit like ash in his mouth. At the door, a group of giggling girls came in, and Sho scooted down in his seat, hoping to hide more.
After he'd forced the noodles down, he took a drink of water, resolving not to take any more bites of his meal, even if Aiba thought it strange to order and not eat.
"Do you think they're sleeping together?" Aiba asked, suddenly. Sho promptly spit out the water in his mouth as he coughed, half of it going down without being actively swallowed. As he hacked and clawed at his throat, Aiba calmly cleaned up the mess he'd made on the table with the spare napkins. When his hacking subsided- at least enough to speak- Sho glared at the other man and patted his face with his jacket sleeve.
"What?" he hissed. He was angry that Aiba would bring it up in a crowded ramen restaurant, when there were people swarming everywhere- at least, that's what he assumed the tightness in his chest was all about.
"Do you?" Aiba repeated.
"I- don't think that's really our business," Sho sputtered, trying to regain focus. His ramen was ruined; not that he'd really been looking forward to eating it before the water incident, anyway. And Aiba just laughed, taking another big bite of his noodles and slurping the ends noisily in his mouth.
"No, but I still wonder," he admitted, after taking a second to swallow. He grinned again, and looked at Sho with raised eyebrows. "Don't you?"
"I- no," Sho tried.
"I mean, Jun was acting a little fishy, right? At filming," Aiba continued, oblivious to Sho's inability to form complete thoughts at the moment. "We rarely bring people in to watch, and even then it's
only ever close friends and family. It was just weird, that's all. I thought maybe you had noticed it, too."
"No," Sho said, hoping that his strangled voice sounded more normal to everyone else than it did to his own ears. "I didn't think anything was weird."
"Ah," Aiba said, nodding and smacking his lips loudly. "I guess it was just me, then!"
Sho stared down at his bowl of rapidly cooling noodles, feeling as if he was going to throw up.
"You tried calling him?" he asked, after a long moment, working around the lump that had developed in his throat.
"Twice," his companion answered, and then snapped his fingers, eyes widening. "Ah! Leader said they were going on some boat tour today, that's right. I should have remembered that."
"Boat tour?" Sho repeated. He felt like a parrot- a parrot that was being strangled, bit by bit.
"Sounds kinda boring, right?" Aiba laughed. "But maybe not to someone from America."
"Yeah," Sho replied, without really thinking. "Boring."
There was a pause, and after a few moments of Sho staring aimlessly down at the table in front of him, Aiba poked him in the arm.
"Sho-san?" he asked. "Aren't you hungry? You haven't touched your ramen."
Sho pushed the bowl away from him, wishing it could just be gone, like so many other things in his life.
"Naw," he said. "Let's just pay and go."
Chapter: 5/12
Fandom: Arashi
Character, Pairing(s): Matsumoto Jun/Zac Efron, Sho --> Jun
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Language, explicit sexual situations.
Summary: What had been a one-time thing has turned into ... not a one-time thing. And they aren't the only ones involved.
Something might have been lost in the translation, but Zac was quickly figuring out that Jun wasn't going to be introducing him as anything other than a friend, at least not any time soon. As soon as they'd gotten back to Arashi's green room, Zac had been ambushed by Ninomiya, who seemed to be speaking in rather speedy Japanese on purpose to mess with him.
Jun kept his distance, and although Zac's heart was beating a mile a minute from what had happened in the bathroom, he did his best to act casual. The group's leader, Ohno, invited him (and by default, Jun) out to dinner with him and Nino. The one Zac had dubbed the 'crazy one' in his mind, Aiba, had already left, and Sho hadn't returned either.
It had been a chance encounter on the street, but it seemed that Sakurai Sho was not only the one who'd been sneaking around with Jun's phone but had been the person he'd bumped into on the street months earlier when he was last in Japan. Zac wasn't sure what to think of the guy. During the show filming, Sho had seemed anything but a bad guy. Even though Zac only picked up a few words every sentence, Sho had done the majority of the speaking during the filming, interviewing the guest and providing introductions for different segments. Underneath that professional exterior, though, who was the real Sakurai Sho?
Zac couldn't help noticing the awkwardness between Jun and his band mate during the dancing segment. Even from the broadcast booth it was obvious that something was going on there. But none of the other Arashi members seemed to be acting curious about it since the filming hadn't stopped or been commented on. Even in the green room, everyone had been chatting amiably.
But Zac couldn't get his mind off of Sho now that he'd seen him in person. The guy, for all he appeared the professional actor on set, had nearly ruined his vacation. Sure, it was an issue between Jun and Sho, but it affected Zac's life too.
He was brought out of his thoughts by Ninomiya's arm linked through his. “Sashimi for Hollywood boy!”
Jun rolled his eyes, muttering something about Nino wanting Zac and his 'gold card' and the three of them laughed. Too bad he hadn't brought his dictionary with from his hotel room. He smiled obligingly and let Nino drag him from the room, Ohno and Jun following behind. They crammed into a cab, and he was stuck between Ohno and Nino while Jun sat up front. Despite their earlier closeness, Jun was definitely playing it cool.
Maybe it was the post-filming giddiness, but Zac immediately noticed that Ohno and Nino were awfully affectionate. Even with him in the middle, Nino was continuously stretching a hand back to ruffle Ohno's hair or poke at him with his shoe. He looked to the front seat, and Jun was staring out the window as the cab drove them through the night to the Shibuya ward. Zac had never been this close with his friends - he wasn't sure what to make of the relationship amongst the Arashi members. Then again, he hadn't been in a group with the same four guys for ten years like they had.
The cab pulled up, and Nino tugged on him again. Ohno and Jun went on ahead, and they walked to a rear entrance. Luckily, one of them must have called ahead as they were led to a private room in the back of the restaurant. Even in this wealthier district, the restaurant had thin paper walls separating them, and Zac's ears were overwhelmed with the sounds of so many different voices chattering away on the main restaurant floor.
Ohno and Nino were nearly sitting on top of one another on one end of the booth while Jun sat at a comfortable distance beside him, his eyes scanning the menu. Zac didn't know what to say. Even if he did know what to say, making sure all three of his table mates understood him would be nearly impossible. So he just looked at the room décor, whatever kana he recognized on the menu and wondered when he'd get to be alone with Jun again. It was hard to sit next to him and not be able to do or say anything since they were in mixed company.
Sake arrived, and he and Jun reached for the flask at the same time. Zac nearly jumped from his skin at the contact, but Ohno and Nino were too busy holding the menu between them to notice. Jun looked slightly flustered but waved Zac away. “I'll serve you,” he said quietly.
He hoped that the warmth of the room would explain away the blush he felt rising into his cheeks. If not, the alcohol would do a good job of it. Zac wasn't altogether fond of sake. He'd spent plenty of time puking it back up when he'd been in Japan the last time, thankfully when Jun wasn't around.
They placed their orders as Zac sipped the strong liquor. Ohno, who was already quiet enough as it was, said something about getting a bit of everything for Zac to try. He'd been very kind so far. It was pretty obvious that Ohno looked out for people in his own humble way. English wasn't the strongest suit for any of the three men at the table, but it wasn't as if Zac was an experienced Japanese speaker. But they tried for his sake.
“What...happening tomorrow?” Nino asked, reaching to refill Ohno's cup. Zac actually hadn't thought that far. He and Jun hadn't done a whole lot of talking, and as much as Zac wanted to spend as much time with him as possible, he knew that Jun had plenty of obligations.
So it surprised him when Jun interrupted. “Signed up...myself and Zac. Tokyo Bay boat tour.” Jun looked to him sheepishly. “Chance...did not get chancc...”
Zac understood, feeling the warmth in his cheeks deepen. “That would be great. Thank you so much.” He found himself unable to look away from Jun, who seemed to be studying him rather intently. Their table companions were half sitting on each other and yet he and Jun had to keep their distance. Jun's fingers were tapping out an erratic rhythm on his seat, as if he was fixing to close that distance, the others be damned, but Zac knew he hadn't had enough to drink for that yet. Fearing what Ohno and Nino would think, he turned to them and smiled, trying to find the words in Japanese this time.
“Thought I would be walking by myself...Matsumoto-sama takes good care of...” Well, maybe he'd had more sake than he thought as Nino nearly fell over laughing, and Jun looked rather embarrassed. “What? What did I say?”
“You called him Matsumoto-sama,” Ohno pointed out, seemingly unmoved by it as the server returned with a large serving plate and smaller plates, as well as soy sauce for dipping the raw fish.
“I meant...” Zac fumbled over the words, and Nino just kept laughing.
“He's learning!” Jun replied huffily. “Don't be a prat.”
“...probably paid Zac-san to call him that,” Nino said quickly, and Zac was able to translate that easily enough.
Everyone laughed amiably, and Zac did his best to keep up with the others' drinking, much as he'd probably be hurling all through the boat ride the following day. The food wasn't what Zac was used to, but it was really good, and he would never have been able to eat like this on his own wandering the streets as a tourist. This was a place for locals, not Americans on press tours.
Nino and Ohno had to excuse themselves first since they were apparently filming a segment for one of Arashi's many variety shows the following morning and had to make an early train. Zac felt great relief at their departure despite enjoying their company. Now he and Jun would get to spend time together, just the two of them. Although Zac wasn't sure just where that sort of time would lead.
The other two left, Jun making a big deal about picking up the check despite Ohno's insistence. They were just about to start a conversation, ideally about what their post-dinner plans were when the server slid open the door and bowed humbly to Jun. They spoke in rapid fire Japanese, and Zac had been drinking way too much at that point to follow along.
Jun turned to him apologetically. “Chef's daughter...big fan of Arashi. Food on...” Jun searched for the right words. “Food on the house if I greet...”
“Go,” Zac waved, unable to suppress a laugh. “Go on, I can't leave without you.” Which was true since he probably would have difficulty leaving on his own power. He sighed as Jun departed with the server, and the sliding panel closed again. He was alone as Jun's phone on the table pinged with a text message.
A few moments passed, and Jun still hadn't returned. The phone pinged with another message. Zac was growing antsy. Someone was definitely trying to get a hold of Jun. What if it was urgent? What if it was his family? Maybe it was his concern for Jun or maybe it was his alcoholic buzz that made him pick up the phone when it rang.
“Hello, this is Jun's phone,” he slurred, and some part of his mind was screaming that this was a really bad decision. Hadn't this just happened behind Jun's back before?
The line was quiet, and he said hello again but this time in Japanese. There was a voice over the line, and Zac's pulse quickened. “Uh hello, this is Sho.”
“Jun is busy right now,” he said, remembering all too well being on the other side of something like this just days earlier. “Can I pass along a message?” he fired back quickly in English, feeling more and more vindictive for some reason.
He heard Sho breathing on the other end. “I can call back.”
Zac smarted at Sho's flawless English, and he tightened his grip on the cell phone. “Listen, I don't want to do this on the phone.” Do what, he asked himself as his words came faster than the thoughts to back them up. “I want to talk to you. In person.” He did? What the hell was the sake doing to his brain?
“That's probably not-”
“It's clear that we're both Jun's friends,” Zac said back, knowing that Sho had probably just been concerned for Jun earlier. Why else answer a friend's phone? Zac was answering now for the same reason, wasn't he? “So I want to clear the air.”
“I don't think we should do that.”
“Why? You afraid I'd tell Jun about that night I ran into you? Just what were you doing there, huh?”
The line was so silent that Zac thought Sho had hung up. “Very well. When shall we meet?” Sho sounded like he was using that presenter voice of his, calm and controlled, while Zac knew he sounded like some jealous lunatic.
“Tonight,” Zac said before he realized what that meant. “We meet tonight. You know where my hotel is. I'm sure you remember.” Sho's silence was acknowledgment enough. “11 PM.”
“11 PM. Goodbye.”
The line went dead, and Zac realized the magnitude of what he'd just done. He was supposed to be with Jun tonight, wasn't he? And now he'd just invited Sakurai Sho to his hotel room? He stared at the cell phone for a few seconds, blinking in his horror. He'd done the same thing to Jun that Sho had. How was he any better?
His fingers clicked through the phone, and he felt like a complete jerk as he deleted Sho's texts and received call. Jun would never find out this time. He'd set the record straight with Sho, and then he and Jun could spend time together without any weirdness. That would be the best, right? Jun wouldn't have to be hurt any longer, right?
Zac's doubts grew as he set the phone back where Jun left it. He downed another tiny cup full of sake and was already feeling sick to his stomach when the sliding panel opened and an anxious looking Jun returned.
“Sorry I...I took a long time. Shall we go?”
Zac knew they had the boat ride the following day, and then two more guaranteed days of vacation. Once this bit with Sho was talked out, they'd have plenty of time together, wouldn't they? Zac held his stomach and gave Jun a sad gaze. “I think...I do not think the sashimi agrees with my stomach.”
Jun looked disappointed, pocketing his phone with a sigh. “I am sorry. Raw fish...not for all people,” he muttered in English. “Let me...call a taxi.”
Zac nodded, willing the guilt to go away. He had two hours before Sho would arrive at his hotel. Cold shower, definitely. He accepted Jun's help as he stumbled from the restaurant, trying not to wince as Jun affectionately rubbed his arm on the cab ride back to the Hyatt.
------
He shouldn't be nervous.
By all accounts, he shouldn't be anything- he was going to the Grand Hyatt Tokyo, to the room number that had been burned in his brain since last week, tasting like guilt and betrayal and his own stupidity. It didn't mean anything, because there wasn't anything it could mean- or so he kept telling himself over and over during the car ride, even as he got out of the car and made his way up through the lobby.
He'd stuck a baseball cap on to hide himself; the last thing Johnny needed was a scandal about him going to some girl's hotel room. And even worse if he found out the truth- how could Sho even explain that? "Sorry, Johnny, I got a call that I needed to meet Jun's possible boyfriend for an old-fashioned rumble in the hotel hallway?"
Sho shook his head. It didn't mean anything.
But the elevator ride felt like it took forever.
No one was in the corridor when he departed the elevator and let the doors slide closed behind him with a resounding 'ping'. There was a moment- only a brief one- where he considered just leaving and not showing up, After all, what could Zac do? Jun couldn't know what was going to happen, he couldn't know what Zac had asked for- who would he tell?
But something kept Sho's feet glued to the floor, and he wasn't sure what it was. He walked to the room and rapped his knuckles on the door before he lost his nerve again. It took awhile to answer; stupid, Zac had to know who it was, unless he'd ordered room service to greet Sho with.
When the door opened, Sho wasn't sure what to expect. Zac just leveled him with a hard look- his hair was a bit wet, and curling around the edges. He'd clearly showered since leaving wherever he and Jun had gone. There was a long moment, and then he stepped aside, allowing Sho to enter.
It wasn't entirely a good sign. Whatever was going to happen wasn't fit for the hallway- or at least Zac didn't expect it to be. Sho just walked in with a glare of his own. He wouldn't make any falsehoods about liking the American; there was obviously no love lost between them.
Zac didn't say anything- he just let Sho loiter awkwardly near the door, and leaned back against the fake mahoghany desk against the wall, beneath the mirror. He folded his arms across his chest and stared at his feet, crossed at the ankles.
"Well, you brought me here," Sho said, mostly out of necessity because nothing else was being done. "What is it that you wanted?"
"I told you," Zac said, still glaring at his socks. "Clear the air."
"About what?"
"About what you did," the American spat, finally looking angry. "And why."
Sho took a deep breath. He was starting to get mad- the guy had no idea what their lives were like, no idea how hectic, how stressful. He didn't know what made their group work, or their shows a success. He didn't know Johnny, or the industry, or even them- not even Jun, not that well. And yet he was standing there on a pedastal, on a horse, thinking he knew everything and could pass judgments on ten years of togetherness, on ten years of being in Arashi.
"Because I know what the cost is," Sho said, finally, through clenched teeth. "And I know what the consequences are."
"And you think you can just make those decisions for another person?" Zac replied. His arms uncrossed, and he looked agitated- nervous. Full of energy.
"Sometimes someone has to," Sho hissed. "Someone outside the situation."
"It's never your decision to make!" Zac cried. "And even if you have something to say, you don't do it like that- you don't do it backhandedly, behind their back."
"And you are so much better," Sho said, laughing derisively. "Didn't you do the same thing to get me here?"
Zac flushed, and Sho knew he had hit a nerve; it was one, at least, that he had managed to score. His palms were sweaty and his fingers were stiff, and he tried to work out the tension by unclenching them at his sides.
"Yes," the American admitted, finally. "I did. And I'm not proud of it. But you- you didn't just hurt him, you know. You affected me, and my plans."
"Your plans?" Sho asked, astounded. "You would know a lot about ruining plans."
Zac didn't seem to understand that one. He just gave Sho an incredulous look.
"Yes, I would," he stated. "Because you did a very good job."
"It's not about you," Sho said.
"It's always been about me!" Zac exclaimed. "It's me that you have the problem with, isn't it? It's me that you don't like, me that you want gone. It's not him- it's all about me."
"About what you are doing to him, then," Sho clarified.
"How about what you are doing to me, huh?" the other man said. "How about all the things you say aren't about me that are affecting me. Affecting me, and my life, and my plans."
Sho shook his head.
"That's not import-"
"Don't try to tell me what is important and what isn't!" Zac interrupted. He was speaking quicker, his words clipping; it was harder to understand when he got worked up. Sho was good, but when his own blood was boiling, it was much more difficult to concentrate on. "You have no right to say that!"
"And you have no right to come in here and change everything!" Sho fired back. He had taken a step forward without even realizing he had moved, and out of the corner of his eye, he could see his reflection in the mirror. His skin was flushed. He looked out of his mind.
"Change what?" Zac cried. "I didn't change anything!"
"You changed everything!"
Zac took a step backwards, and something on his face cleared- realization. He laughed, just a bit, like the one breath before admitting something on the tip of the tongue that comes out in a rush, in a giddy, uncontrollable mess.
"You-" he stopped, a hand moving to his mouth, to half cover his lips. It was the change in tension, the shifting in control. "Are you in love with him?"
Sho's blood was cold. Something was stuck in his throat, and he couldn't swallow.
"What?" he managed to choke out. "What- no. No."
But Zac just kept looking at him, staring at him with eyes too blue to be real, and it felt like something was slowly sinking that needed desperately to be kept afloat.
"It's business," Sho said. "It's a risk. And I know you don't understand, but that's what it is. He's going to hurt himself. He's going to fuck everything up, don't you see? His career, our group- everything."
"No," Zac said, slowly, shaking his head. One hand had moved to the top of the desk, like an anchor. "No, you didn't answer my question."
"Because I don't need to," Sho spat.
"Maybe not," Zac said.
There was a long moment in which neither spoke, and Sho struggled to right his breath. It felt like someone had their foot on his chest, pressing against his lungs; he couldn't find the air he needed. The room had gotten very hot, and he hadn't noticed it. His face was burning, his hands sticky.
"Do you get it now?" Sho asked, fighting to regain some semblance of control on his surroundings. "You can't let him ruin everything. It's not just him- it's all of us. I can't let you ruin that. Do you see? Do you get it?"
"Yes," Zac said, a breath, really, just a gasp of air. The sides of his mouth were still curved up, like he was enjoying a sick joke that no one else could hear.
"Good," Sho said. He jammed his hands roughly into his jacket pockets. "Then don't continue this. Don't give him the chance to destroy everything we've worked so hard for."
He stalked from the room, and Zac didn't call out to him. He didn't say anything, he didn't do anything; he just let Sho leave. And even though Sho had gotten the last word, even though he knew from the weight in his stomach that everything he'd said was right, everything was true-
-he still felt like he'd lost as he pressed the button in the elevator to go back down to the lobby.
And he didn't know why.
------
Jun had gone to sleep frustrated the night before. He probably should have known better than asking Zac to eat sashimi and drink sake, especially at the speed Leader drank. Zac had looked miserable when he brought him back to the hotel, and now he was making him get on a lunch cruise boat?
Well, the money was nothing. They could go anywhere really, since Jun had nothing until a promotional photo shoot in the early evening. It was nice to have the day hours off for a change. He was surprised to see Zac looking rather healthy and refreshed when he picked him up in the morning. “Feeling better?” Jun asked as the driver held the door for the sedan open.
Zac didn't even ask questions about their transportation as he slid onto the leather seat. Celebrities were used to being carted around no matter what part of the world it was. “Yes, much better actually...once I threw up.”
Jun nodded. “I'm sorry. You did not...not as...” He frowned, wishing he'd spent more time practicing English. But then again, his best tutor wasn't exactly the person he wanted to consult with in this instance. “You did not have to drink so much with us.”
Zac waved him off. “No, no. It was fun.” The car pulled away from the hotel, and Zac fidgeted a little. “Can we...” he continued in English. “Can we talk?”
“Oh, yes.” Japan was just as gossip obsessed as the United States, but since Johnny's were so recognizable, they had recommended companies for these sort of situations. He inclined his head at the driver, separated from them by glass anyhow. “Paid not to talk or listen. Probably no English.”
This seemed to pacify him. “I'm sorry about last night,” Zac said quietly. “Sorry we didn't get to...”
Jun felt his skin grow warm at the implication in Zac's words. He was sorry too. There was only today and tomorrow left for this visit, and Jun would be out the whole evening tonight for the shoot. He ran a hand through his hand nervously. “We have time.” He couldn't help reverting to his native language. “We'll figure things out as we go.”
Zac seemed to get the basic idea, and his skin flushed a bit. It would be difficult to get through the entire boat ride without acting as more than friends. It had been hard to keep his hands off of the other man in the bathroom the night before, but Jun was enough of a clean freak that he'd prefer to avoid that sort of thing in the future. The car managed to get them from Zac's hotel to the boat docks within half an hour.
None of the folks milling around seemed to recognize them. Jun kept sunglasses and a baseball cap on while Zac kept the hood of his sweatshirt pulled up. They claimed their tickets and boarded, making their way to the top deck. It was looking like rain, and this ride cruised Tokyo Bay for a good two hours. Maybe if they stayed up on deck fewer people would bother them.
“Wait, wait,” Zac said as Jun headed away from the rail to find a seat. “Pose there.” Rainbow Bridge was visible in the background. It was probably a good shot for a foreigner to get.
As Zac pulled his digital camera from his pocket, he spoke without thinking. “Sho has a camera just like that.” He saw Zac tense up immediately, and Jun felt like an idiot. The last person they needed to think about today was Sho, and Jun had already thought of him twice now. He leaned against the rail and tried to strike a cool pose. It would be practice for that evening anyhow. Zac snapped the photo quietly, holding it out for Jun to get one of him.
Zac sat on the rail, balancing easily, and Jun tried not to let his hands shake as he took the picture. Idiot, he chastised himself. Stupid. The captain announced the boat's imminent departure and only a few older people had joined them up on the deck as a drizzling mist started to fall. They took seats near the rear of the boat where the fewest people had gathered.
Jun remembered that Zac was still a tourist, and he got up several times to take photos of skyscrapers and other sites in the bay. There was another announcement from the captain that meals would be served below decks in a few minutes. “Lunch?” he asked after about the twentieth time Zac got up.
“I...” Zac said as he sat back down at his side, and their thighs touched. Jun felt the other man's body heat, and even with the misty rain, it was hard to not do anything. He reached out a hand, brushing Zac's bangs away from his forehead. His hood wasn't doing a good job keeping the front of his hair dry. “I'm not really hungry.”
Jun nodded, taking off his sunglasses and shoving them in his pocket. “Me neither.” He got to his feet, swaying a bit as the boat was now in the choppier waters of the bay. Not having the words for it, just going on gut feeling, he started to walk. By now the deck was abandoned as the older folks had gone down for the lunch they'd all paid for. He licked his lips, making it to the empty stairwell between the decks and out of the rain and removed his hat.
He could hear glasses clinking and people chatting away down below. Jun turned, leaning back against the rail, and sure enough, Zac had followed him. The American smiled, making the first move in this instance, going straight for Jun's mouth with his own. Zac made a pleased, low sound deep in his throat, and this only spurred Jun on. He shoved at the other man's hood, pushing it back so he could run his fingers through the messy, light strands. In his enthusiasm, his rings got a bit caught in Zac's hair, and his companion showed his displeasure by nipping Jun's bottom lip hard.
“You're rough, High School Musical,” he commented, brushing his fingers along Zac's jawline.
Zac worked his hands under Jun's rain dampened shirt, warm fingers like electricity up and down the cool skin of his stomach. They were in such a hurry to feel and touch that their noses kept bopping against one another, and Jun could only laugh quietly against Zac's mouth. Jun couldn't keep from gasping as the other man ran his fingers along his belt, moving up and in to run teasingly along the stretchy waistband of his boxers.
“You brought me here, Hana Yori Dango.”
It was a bit harder for Jun to get his hands under the sweatshirt and button-down of his companion, and his frustration increased. The last thing he needed was to lose control now. “Still an hour left,” Jun reminded Zac as his fingers dipped lower to find the bare skin of Jun's hips. One more hour of the boat swaying on the waves while old people spoke about the gaudy new buildings going up.
Zac kissed roughly along Jun's jaw and breathed heavy in his ear. “Bathroom?”
Jun rolled his eyes. It seemed that Zac didn't have the same issues in that regard. Reluctantly, he detangled his limbs from Zac's, leaning his forehead against his. “No way.”
Zac's breathing was coming in gasps as he took his hands back. “You're a tease, Matsumoto.”
He pulled Zac's hood back up and kissed him once more, lingering more than he should have since voices were growing closer. “I'm sorry.” He dug around his mind for the English, and it was harder to focus since Zac was still pressed up against him, and it was quite clear that Zac wanted him just as badly. “We go...back to hotel unless you have more...sightseeing?”
Zac pulled away and bounded back up the steps with a wry smile. “I can see Tokyo later tonight instead.” They sat back on the bench on the top deck, closer than they had to, and even the chilly mist wasn't enough to cool Jun's ardor. It would be the longest hour of his life.
------
The ride back to the hotel felt like it took a lifetime, buildings flashing by outside. Zac kept his fingers tapping against the leather of the seats nervously, unable to stop the habit; his nerves were still on overdrive, though the majority of it was now from anxiety and not from arousal. Everything was catching up around him- the weight of what they were doing, the severity, and how much he desperately craved it, it all wrapped around his thoughts and refused to let go.
As they neared the drop-off station outside the lobby of the Grand Hyatt, Jun shifted, moving his hand so that his pinky rested against Zac's own. A slight movement, and their pinkies were entwined- Zac smiled against the palm of his other hand, keeping his gaze out the window, where it was safer. At least he wasn't the only one feeling everything; at least he wasn't the only one who was nervous. The gesture was reassuring, and dispelled a few of the knots that had taken up residence in his stomach.
They stayed silent during the elevator ride up to the fourth floor.
"This is it," he joked, opening the door with the key card and pushing it aside. "Life of luxury."
He was half-babbling, because he wasn't sure what else to say. Jun looked around like he cared what the inside of the room looked like, taking in all the details- it was interesting the way his eyes always flickered over everything, like he was taking notes. Zac was fairly certain that he could recite specifics if asked later, once gone; probably about anything, acting included. It was just one of the things that was so intriguing about the other man.
Jun turned, a half-smile ghosting across his features.
"It's nice," he said, in English. "Very- open."
It was space-filler, nerve-helper; they just looked at each other for a long moment, and then they met in the middle, both moving at once. It wasn't very coordinated, not really; not when Jun missed Zac's mouth, a bit, to hit the corner of his lips instead. But it was frenzied, rougher- a pace they hadn't been able to reach yet. It struck Zac, vaguely, like a thought floating around through the haze he was currently in, that it was the first time that they had really been alone since the first time they'd met, and even that was just in a hallway. It spurned him onward, and he dug his hands into Jun's hair, trying to pull him closer still.
Jun moaned into his mouth, which alighted a ping of nerves down Zac's spine that settled in his abdomen, like hot coals. He nipped at Zac's bottom lip- retribution for earlier on the boat ride, no doubt- and his hands worked their way under his sweatshirt. He couldn't quite get to the buttons of Zac's button-down with the material in the way. He pulled back, kissing Zac's jawline as he tugged on the offending article.
"Off," he breathed, against Zac's earlobe. "Now."
It was impossible to disobey him, when he took that tone. Zac tore the sweatshirt off, throwing it somewhere on the opposite side of the room, near the corner. Then Jun's hands were on his shirt, pulling at the buttons impatiently, his mouth hot against Zac's neck again. It was heady just to run his hands through Jun's hair, to let his fingers tangle in the wisps at the back of his neck. Jun was having trouble with the buttons, and made a noise of frustration in the back of his throat, pressing their bodies together. The friction resulting as the denim of their jeans ground against the other made him gasp.
It occured to him as he threw his head back- allowing Jun more access to the sensitive skin of his jawline- that they were still standing in the middle of the hotel room when there was a bed not a foot away, covered with an odd-floral comforter. He tugged at Jun, distracting him from the buttons of his shirt, only to meet his mouth again- it was demanding. They stumbled backwards, Zac's calf hitting the side of the mattress before he fell onto it.
Jun's weight was incredibly arousing. Zac let his fingers slip below the waistband of his jeans, skimming across the skin, and was pleased when the other man arched his back up into the touch, groaning.
Jun mumbled something that Zac couldn't catch against his mouth- the Japanese was too slurred, too breathy for him to understand, but he got the general idea. Zac kissed him, hard, and moved one hand from the other man's waist to slide across the skin of his neck again. Jun gave a little gasp every time Zac's fingers grazed his jaw, his ear, and so Zac kept doing it, pulling himself away from Jun's lips to kiss his collarbone. Jun's shirt was getting in the way.
"Here," Jun said, in English, which Zac appreciated, because he was having trouble trying to find the Japanese for the words he wanted. Jun sat up and shrugged out of his shirt, and Zac didn't give him the opportunity to move back down. He sat up, hands on Jun's waist, to kiss his navel, working his way down to the bones of his hips. The other man jerked a bit, hands reaching down to grasp Zac's shoulders tightly- Zac could almost feel the muscles in his arms twitching, alert. He kissed Jun's skin just above his jeans, and the other man moaned, catching the noise halfway by biting down on his lower lip.
Zac, a surge of adrenaline rushing through his veins, took the opportunity to flip the other man to his back, straddling his thighs. It was easy to lean forward and kiss him again, especially when Jun's eyes got wide- with his arms splayed against the pillows, it was incredibly alluring.
Jun bit his lip, hard- Zac tasted a sting of bitter copper on his tongue as he swept it across their joined mouths, and he swallowed his own groan of frustration. He rocked his hips against Jun's waist, running one hand down the other man's chest with more force than was necessary. He was almost painfully aroused, and the action only made it that much worse- he repeated it, fumbling with the button and zipper of Jun's jeans, hardly aware of what his own hands were doing. He just knew he wanted more, more heat, more friction.
"Ah," Jun breathed, pulling away from Zac's mouth as Zac slid his hand under the denim covering his waist. He was already hard; he gasped sharply when Zac ran his hand along his length, arching under his palm. His fingernails dug into Zac's shoulders, and it didn't hurt- not really. Zac rocked his hips forward, trying to satiate his own growing need, even as he sped up the rate in which his hand was moving on Jun's cock.
The rhythm was quick, rushed. Jun let out another gasp, lips parted, and Zac moved forward to cover Jun's mouth with his own. The other man tasted like sweat, like a hint of green tea. Zac's fingers closed around Jun's member, and Jun groaned, throatily, against his lips.
Jun's hands were so tense around Zac's shoulders, and Zac momentarily removed his hand to pull the other man's jeans all the way off his hips. They were tight, and they stuck, and he had to fully sit up to do it, pushing upwards to yank them down Jun's thighs.
When he bent down again, he kissed Jun's stomach, working across the taut skin there. His arms were shaking, and he didn't think it was from muscle strain.
"I-" he started, looking up. "I've never-"
"Me either," Jun gasped. Some of Zac's nervousness disappeared, and he moved his hand back down to stroke Jun's cock again. When his fingertips grazed the head, Jun moaned, and the sound itself was enough to spur Zac onward. He slid down Jun's body to take his cock in his mouth.
Jun let out a hiss, muscles jerking. One hand tightened around the blanket and the other moved to roughly tangle in Zac's hair, like a guide, like an upsoken demand. It was heady.
It wasn't difficult to fall into the rhythm. Just the sounds Jun was making were enough to keep Zac's own arousal strong- little mews, breathy moans, pants that caught in his chest. The tension of Jun's hand pulling on his hair- Zac could swirl his tongue to ellicit them all, could change the position of his hand at the base. He could feel Jun's stomach muscles contract, feel his legs twitch. Then the hand in his hair tightened painfully, twisting, and Jun came with a jolt and a hitching groan.
Zac shifted as Jun's breathing began to even out, wiping at his chin with the back of his hand. The fingers in his hair momentarily relaxed, and then tightened again, pulling him up for a rough kiss. The motion caused their bodies to grind together, and Zac couldn't stop the gasp, especially not when Jun's free hand slid down his chest, to his stomach, to the waistband of his jeans.
"Jun," he choked out, when the other man's mouth left his to kiss his neck. "You-"
"Shut up," Jun demanded, unbuttoning Zac's pants.
"You-" Zac tried again, ignoring the command, unable to get any other word off the tip of his tongue. He wanted to tell Jun that he didn't have to, that he wasn't obligated to, but it was all the more difficult when Jun's fingers curled around the base of his cock.
"Yes," Jun said, against Zac's collarbone, where he was raining kisses across his shoulders. He pushed the fabric of Zac's shirt down his arms. The air felt like a shock against his bare skin, but the building friction from Jun's hand made it hard to focus on anything else.
Jun moved, mouth making hot trails down until it overlapped his fingers, nestled around Zac's shaft. The explosion of heat, the softness of his lips, the ringing knowledge that it was Jun, it was Jun- Zac moaned, bucking his hips up against the warmth, unable to stop himself.
He could feel Jun's grin, but it meant nothing compared to his mouth working up and down on his cock. He threw his arms to either side to grab a hold of the pillows there, squeezing tightly, trying desperately to hold on longer. It was so much, too much, and the pressure was already building in his abdomen.
The rhythm escalated, and he rocked his hips to meet it, powerless to do otherwise. Fingers curled around his base, and then moved to splay across his stomach, to claw at the skin. A groan caught in the back of his mouth, choking him.
"Fuck," he gasped. "Fuck, Jun-"
The orgasm rippled through him like waves, wrenching a moan and Jun's name again from his lips. His muscles jerked, and when they finally stilled, Jun's hand moved to his chest, to his shoulder, like a gentle reminder of where he was.
His weight shifted, and Zac opened his eyes only to grab the sides of Jun's face and kiss him- he couldn't think of anything else he wanted to do. He opened his mouth, demanding access, and Jun's hands curled around his wrists, his arms, and-
-Jun's phone rang.
Jun pulled away, confused for a second, obviously trying to discern what was going on. Then he jumped, springing into action as he started looking for where his jeans had ended up on the floor.
"Shit," he hissed, in Japanese, tearing through the pockets in the denim until he found the offending device. "Hello?"
Zac couldn't hear the other side of the conversation, and Jun didn't say much- mostly "I understand"'s and "I'm sorry"'s. When he hung up, he looked worried.
"I'm late," he explained, throwing his clothing back on and running his hands through his hair. Once dressed, he knelt on the bed, kissing Zac chastely. "I'll call you when the shoot is done."
Then he was gone, and Zac just watched him go, the door clicking shut behind him.
------
"You know, we could go anywhere to eat," Sho commented, and Aiba just gave him a wide grin, picking up his chopsticks and knocking them together twice.
"But I like ramen," he said, lifting up the noodles as if to explain. Sho shook his head, staring down at his own steaming bowl. He hadn't been hungry for much lately, and after last night- well, his appetite hadn't managed to come back at all yet. It would have been rude to turn down Aiba's invitation to join him for dinner, and he couldn't really explain why he would have without lying. He'd done too much of that lately.
"I called Jun, too, but he didn't answer," Aiba sighed, through a mouth full of ramen.
"He's with Zac," Sho said, without thinking, before he could bite it back. Across the table, his bandmate blinked, and then nodded, as if remembering that Jun had a guest for the next few days. "He's probably busy showing him around Tokyo."
"Right," Aiba said, and laughed. When Sho eyed him, Aiba just shrugged a little bit, as if apologizing in his own way. "I just- Tokyo, right."
Since Sho never really understood the majority of Aiba's abrupt mood changes, he let it go, taking a bite of his ramen. Even the small bite tasted a bit like ash in his mouth. At the door, a group of giggling girls came in, and Sho scooted down in his seat, hoping to hide more.
After he'd forced the noodles down, he took a drink of water, resolving not to take any more bites of his meal, even if Aiba thought it strange to order and not eat.
"Do you think they're sleeping together?" Aiba asked, suddenly. Sho promptly spit out the water in his mouth as he coughed, half of it going down without being actively swallowed. As he hacked and clawed at his throat, Aiba calmly cleaned up the mess he'd made on the table with the spare napkins. When his hacking subsided- at least enough to speak- Sho glared at the other man and patted his face with his jacket sleeve.
"What?" he hissed. He was angry that Aiba would bring it up in a crowded ramen restaurant, when there were people swarming everywhere- at least, that's what he assumed the tightness in his chest was all about.
"Do you?" Aiba repeated.
"I- don't think that's really our business," Sho sputtered, trying to regain focus. His ramen was ruined; not that he'd really been looking forward to eating it before the water incident, anyway. And Aiba just laughed, taking another big bite of his noodles and slurping the ends noisily in his mouth.
"No, but I still wonder," he admitted, after taking a second to swallow. He grinned again, and looked at Sho with raised eyebrows. "Don't you?"
"I- no," Sho tried.
"I mean, Jun was acting a little fishy, right? At filming," Aiba continued, oblivious to Sho's inability to form complete thoughts at the moment. "We rarely bring people in to watch, and even then it's
only ever close friends and family. It was just weird, that's all. I thought maybe you had noticed it, too."
"No," Sho said, hoping that his strangled voice sounded more normal to everyone else than it did to his own ears. "I didn't think anything was weird."
"Ah," Aiba said, nodding and smacking his lips loudly. "I guess it was just me, then!"
Sho stared down at his bowl of rapidly cooling noodles, feeling as if he was going to throw up.
"You tried calling him?" he asked, after a long moment, working around the lump that had developed in his throat.
"Twice," his companion answered, and then snapped his fingers, eyes widening. "Ah! Leader said they were going on some boat tour today, that's right. I should have remembered that."
"Boat tour?" Sho repeated. He felt like a parrot- a parrot that was being strangled, bit by bit.
"Sounds kinda boring, right?" Aiba laughed. "But maybe not to someone from America."
"Yeah," Sho replied, without really thinking. "Boring."
There was a pause, and after a few moments of Sho staring aimlessly down at the table in front of him, Aiba poked him in the arm.
"Sho-san?" he asked. "Aren't you hungry? You haven't touched your ramen."
Sho pushed the bowl away from him, wishing it could just be gone, like so many other things in his life.
"Naw," he said. "Let's just pay and go."