not much
hey everyone. i keep forgetting to write in this thing. just way too many emotions and problems at home to do it. but nothnig huge has been going on, had a few softball and soccer games, a lot of practices, school.. same old same old..
i do have a boyfriend, but i don't get why im jealous that justin likes like 3 chicks. wait no, now he said he doesn't like me, so he only likes 2 chicks. personally i don't understand how you can like more then one person because it doesn't seem fair. but i mean, thats jsut me.and justin-jsut to let you know-kaylee is not out of your league. i like her and everything, but she gets around, and its bad. (not trying to burst anyone's bubble here.)
my parents are having problems- not jsut between them, but having problems with my sister and i. i finally told one of my close friends about all of it, and it made me feel much better because i have been keeping it inside a long time. my grandma's fiancee is in the hospital because he got really sick. they found him on the floor (still alive), but on the floor next to his hospital bed in the middle of the night. he was delirious, and had a stroke. it has been only a month since he had a heart attack, we almost lost him, and im afraid that we are going to loose him now. this would be the 4 death in 8 months. four terribly hard deaths. but im praying he will stay alive.
today i had picture day for softball. i straightened my hair and such and i looked pretty good (hopefully). after that i went to jamba juice with my dad, emma, and sam. it was fun, my dad was making us all laugh. then i had a game, so we all went back to the field. i pulled a muscle in my leg somehow and it hurts badly. i pitched 18 outs, and we won. thank the lord. then i went home, made myself as pretty as possible (very hard thing to do), then went to matt and evan's game. caitlin and i went, it was fun. we hung out with megan all game, or as long as we stayed. i talked to beeker for a while, he is actually pretty cool when he is by himself. evan got a ttriple, and matt got hit in the back when he was up to bat. it looked like it hurt.
i got home, i think evan may come over, probably not though. so i don't really have anything to do tonigh. i am jsut praying that my grandma's fiancee won't die. she can't loose another husband. okay evan can't come over, i might go chill with ashley, i don't know.
i don't want to dissapoint my sister sotelo. i hope i didn't. but to me i did the worst thing possible. she says she forgives me, i hope she's not lying. damn, i didn't only dissapoint her, i dissapointed myslef. this is great.
my phsycologist says im the scapegoat of my family, actually i said it and she agrees. all of our family's problems are put on me, or are my fault. so i guess im just a big fuck up, aren't i? oh well, i guess im going to have to cope with being the family problem. there is nothing else i can really do.
sorry this was so long, i needed to say some stuff. good night everyone. sleep well.