Fic: No challenge: struggles and weariness
Title: struggle and weariness ao3 | LJ |
Characters/Pairing: Harry Potter/Marcus Flint
Rating:PG-13
Disclaimer:I own nothing
Word Count:1098
A/N:prompt of 'glass of wine' Asexual!Harry Follow by chapters. Every chap 365 ao3 . This is on part 3 so to catch up I'm just going to post all the chapters in one long chapter here or you can read it in order on ao3.
Summery: He's not happily married. These days he is barely tolerating it. He would much rather be with his Auror partner Marcus and live the quiet life without expectations.
Harry knows he is getting old for a while. He can feel it in his bones. Being a wizard it is not as if he is aging that much or in any sort of trouble with his health. He just feels weary. He admits all of this the second time he catches himself thinking 'When I was your age you ungrateful little shite' in regards to Teddy. It makes him stop and think about where his life is going and where it is and he realises it is way off track.
He's not happily married. These days he is barely tolerating it.
He is not happy with Ginny. She likes the limelight that he shies away from. She's loud and he is quiet and as they get older those opposites don't balance each other so well.
He does not like having sex with her. Really, he does not like having sex at all. It was never a huge interest but he wanted kids so that was that. Thing is, he did not fight a war to endure things he did not want to because society says he should like it. The wary almost looks lovely now. He thought he was lost back then but he wasn't really. He knew exactly what he had to do. Kill Voldemort. He knew that before they told him. It just wasn't so nice to hear it confirmed. Now he wanders through life doing things others say so they don't cause him bother. Some life.
Marcus talks of liking the quiet life. He goes home and puts the radio on and every third night or so he pours himself a whiskey. He goes at his own pace and does his own thing and it sounds marvelous to Harry. Marcus insists that they can be happy together and that he can see how miserable Harry is. He insists Harry can take time but he doesn't need it. Sex would not be a chore he had to do. He would not get chased to apparation points by the press after a meal at a fancy restaurant that didn't feed him enough anyway.
Things must change. He'll talk to Ginny in the morning.
*
"Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. That is a quote and you need to listen to it." Marcus declares on Saturday afternoon as he gets beer out of the fridge. Ginny had been understandably upset and asked Harry to give her some space. "You did the right thing telling her you were not happy anymore. You have to focus on that and not making yourself ruddy miserable."
"She looked so broken. Not many purebloods get asked for a divorce. Taboo and all that." Harry mutters.
"Of course she is but I honestly think she must have known something was off. Hopefully she can come to understand and realise you two are better off apart."
"If you say so. I mean I knew it would hurt her but I can't...I can't do it anymore. And you said we, well-"
Marcus knocks Harry's knee gently with his as he sits down. "Look, we don't need to rush anything alright? You can stay here as long as you need. Sort your separation. Then...then we can talk and...stuff. You know, bigger flat or trying like, dating or something."
"Real eloquent there, mate."
"Shut it, Potter."
They fall into a quiet silence and drink their beer and think about the future. It isn't awkward. That feels fantastic in itself. Marcus mutters something about a Quidditch game a while later and goes over to his side unit to fiddle with the radio while Harry gets more beer out of the fridge. They are going to need more. Some food wouldn't be a bad idea for later either. He has somehow got Marcus hooked on muggle takeaways during their partnership so maybe they can get a pizza in.
He loves the fact that Marcus is being respectful of Ginny. They have three children and really it is four because Teddy is theirs in their hearts and you don't just walk away from that and set up home elsewhere. It is going to take time and a lot of it but for the first time in a while Harry feels relaxed and hopeful about his future as if it is in his hands again.
"Pizza?"
"Pepperoni. And nachos."
"Pig."
"Just order you git."
*
After Harry moves into Marcus' little flat, officially, he notices that the quality of the bottles of wine the older man brings home on a Friday night goes up. He also notices that it takes Marcus longer to choose while Harry busies about in another part of the store finding something for their dinner. It makes him feel strange inside but in a good way. Neither of them officially states that they are trying to date but Marcus takes him to a Quidditch game and Harry drags him off to the Nimbus museum the weekend after. Mrs Flint is old and stuffy and seems to detest every second she has forced to spend in Harry's presence but the Sunday dinner feels like a milestone.
Marcus asks him if he might want to consider sleeping in his bed that night, though he makes it clear that is all he wants. Harry blushes like a school boy and takes far longer to brush his teeth than required before shyly getting into the left side of the bed. Marcus covers Harry's hand with his own and sighs contently. Harry wonders if men his age are meant to be capable of feeling so ridiculous anymore.
Marcus is not very hands on anyway but Harry likes a cuddle and to feel the presence of his partner against his shoulder while he reads the latest paper or sports magazine. They find themselves finding their feet and balancing out. Ron makes it clear that he has not thought Harry and Ginny worked for a long time and if Harry is happy then so is he.
Teddy is the first child he has to content with in regards to giving some straight answers and he certainly wasn't the one Harry expected. Teddy informs him at lunch in the canteen that he is coming for dinner and then marches off before Harry can respond. Marcus has paused with his sandwich halfway to his mouth. "We're going to need more rice."
"That's all you have to say?!"
Marcus composes himself, ever the Slytherin. "Well they had to come around sometime. One at a time suits me fine. More wine perhaps too.
It's something wonderfully safe.
1098/30
37/sam/claw
Characters/Pairing: Harry Potter/Marcus Flint
Rating:PG-13
Disclaimer:I own nothing
Word Count:1098
A/N:prompt of 'glass of wine' Asexual!Harry Follow by chapters. Every chap 365 ao3 . This is on part 3 so to catch up I'm just going to post all the chapters in one long chapter here or you can read it in order on ao3.
Summery: He's not happily married. These days he is barely tolerating it. He would much rather be with his Auror partner Marcus and live the quiet life without expectations.
Harry knows he is getting old for a while. He can feel it in his bones. Being a wizard it is not as if he is aging that much or in any sort of trouble with his health. He just feels weary. He admits all of this the second time he catches himself thinking 'When I was your age you ungrateful little shite' in regards to Teddy. It makes him stop and think about where his life is going and where it is and he realises it is way off track.
He's not happily married. These days he is barely tolerating it.
He is not happy with Ginny. She likes the limelight that he shies away from. She's loud and he is quiet and as they get older those opposites don't balance each other so well.
He does not like having sex with her. Really, he does not like having sex at all. It was never a huge interest but he wanted kids so that was that. Thing is, he did not fight a war to endure things he did not want to because society says he should like it. The wary almost looks lovely now. He thought he was lost back then but he wasn't really. He knew exactly what he had to do. Kill Voldemort. He knew that before they told him. It just wasn't so nice to hear it confirmed. Now he wanders through life doing things others say so they don't cause him bother. Some life.
Marcus talks of liking the quiet life. He goes home and puts the radio on and every third night or so he pours himself a whiskey. He goes at his own pace and does his own thing and it sounds marvelous to Harry. Marcus insists that they can be happy together and that he can see how miserable Harry is. He insists Harry can take time but he doesn't need it. Sex would not be a chore he had to do. He would not get chased to apparation points by the press after a meal at a fancy restaurant that didn't feed him enough anyway.
Things must change. He'll talk to Ginny in the morning.
*
"Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. That is a quote and you need to listen to it." Marcus declares on Saturday afternoon as he gets beer out of the fridge. Ginny had been understandably upset and asked Harry to give her some space. "You did the right thing telling her you were not happy anymore. You have to focus on that and not making yourself ruddy miserable."
"She looked so broken. Not many purebloods get asked for a divorce. Taboo and all that." Harry mutters.
"Of course she is but I honestly think she must have known something was off. Hopefully she can come to understand and realise you two are better off apart."
"If you say so. I mean I knew it would hurt her but I can't...I can't do it anymore. And you said we, well-"
Marcus knocks Harry's knee gently with his as he sits down. "Look, we don't need to rush anything alright? You can stay here as long as you need. Sort your separation. Then...then we can talk and...stuff. You know, bigger flat or trying like, dating or something."
"Real eloquent there, mate."
"Shut it, Potter."
They fall into a quiet silence and drink their beer and think about the future. It isn't awkward. That feels fantastic in itself. Marcus mutters something about a Quidditch game a while later and goes over to his side unit to fiddle with the radio while Harry gets more beer out of the fridge. They are going to need more. Some food wouldn't be a bad idea for later either. He has somehow got Marcus hooked on muggle takeaways during their partnership so maybe they can get a pizza in.
He loves the fact that Marcus is being respectful of Ginny. They have three children and really it is four because Teddy is theirs in their hearts and you don't just walk away from that and set up home elsewhere. It is going to take time and a lot of it but for the first time in a while Harry feels relaxed and hopeful about his future as if it is in his hands again.
"Pizza?"
"Pepperoni. And nachos."
"Pig."
"Just order you git."
*
After Harry moves into Marcus' little flat, officially, he notices that the quality of the bottles of wine the older man brings home on a Friday night goes up. He also notices that it takes Marcus longer to choose while Harry busies about in another part of the store finding something for their dinner. It makes him feel strange inside but in a good way. Neither of them officially states that they are trying to date but Marcus takes him to a Quidditch game and Harry drags him off to the Nimbus museum the weekend after. Mrs Flint is old and stuffy and seems to detest every second she has forced to spend in Harry's presence but the Sunday dinner feels like a milestone.
Marcus asks him if he might want to consider sleeping in his bed that night, though he makes it clear that is all he wants. Harry blushes like a school boy and takes far longer to brush his teeth than required before shyly getting into the left side of the bed. Marcus covers Harry's hand with his own and sighs contently. Harry wonders if men his age are meant to be capable of feeling so ridiculous anymore.
Marcus is not very hands on anyway but Harry likes a cuddle and to feel the presence of his partner against his shoulder while he reads the latest paper or sports magazine. They find themselves finding their feet and balancing out. Ron makes it clear that he has not thought Harry and Ginny worked for a long time and if Harry is happy then so is he.
Teddy is the first child he has to content with in regards to giving some straight answers and he certainly wasn't the one Harry expected. Teddy informs him at lunch in the canteen that he is coming for dinner and then marches off before Harry can respond. Marcus has paused with his sandwich halfway to his mouth. "We're going to need more rice."
"That's all you have to say?!"
Marcus composes himself, ever the Slytherin. "Well they had to come around sometime. One at a time suits me fine. More wine perhaps too.
It's something wonderfully safe.
1098/30
37/sam/claw