It pretty well sums up how I'm feeling right now...
Mercyfuck (Mary Prankster)
I’m not amused anymore
And nothing’s a muse anymore
I sing of love and of hate
But I’m just masturbating my soul
And I don’t want to live anymore
And I don’t want to give anymore
If I fawn, if I flirt, I just keep getting hurt
And it’s taken its toll
I wish I could fuck all my sorrow away
And fuck ’til the dawn of the next fucking day
Fuck the chorus and verse, fuck the pain getting worse
Fuck it all ’til I burn
I wish I could fuck all of you ’til you see
I’m the worst fuck up in all history
Fuck your image and mine, fuck your limp valentine
Fuck it all ’til I learn
I’m not a kid anymore
I don’t know what I did anymore
But on every damn pass, karma bushwacks my ass
And I get it all back
And I don’t want to move anymore
I’ve got nothing to prove anymore
If I run, if I sit, still it all turns to shit
Then it turns to attack
I wish I could fuck all the memory I keep
Fuck the next ten years and just go to sleep
I’m fucked if I do and I’m fucked if I say
I’m fucked if I don’t, so I’m fucked anyway
I wish I could fuck all of you ’til you see
I don’t need your mercyfuck sympathy
Fuck your word and your prayers, fuck your stares and my cares
Fuck it all ’til I learn
*What I have learned from this experience:
1) It doesn't matter how good you've been over the past, oh, 17 or so years of your life. No matter if this was the first time you've EVER gotten in trouble. No matter if you've been the IDEAL student- only ever getting 1 B in their entire life (an 89.4 at that...stupid Geometry). No matter that you've been kind, courteous, cooperative, TRUTHFUL, HONEST, and essintally a marvelous person. Nope. All of my hard work has obviously amounted to Jack Shit.
2) It doesn't matter if you tell the truth. Honesty is obviously never the best policy. It only gets you fucked over in the end. Nope, it is far better to lie. Because it makes perfect sense to punish those that tell the truth and own up to their mistakes.
3) Now that I've lost everything, and I've learned the valuable lessons from above- What the fuck do I have to lose?! They've taken away my extra curriculars (which are my life!). They've taken everything that could possibly mean something to me. They've proven that all my "good girl" activites are pointless. They've proven that actually having a conscience and moral standards is bullshit. So what's to stop me from going and partying next weekend?! I have nothing to lose. Because now I know the game. Go, have a blast, get drunk off my ass, get found out, lie about drinking, then get off scott-free. NOW I GET IT! Yes, that's MARVELOUS attitude. Great punishment. I sure did learn my lesson. *Wide toothy grin*
4) If SADD endorses these sorts of policies...I can't associate myself with them. I am willing to resign. This is ludicrous. Constructive possess is bullshit.
5) My parents are wonderful. Amazing. Marvelous. Stupendous. I couldn't love them more.
6) My friends are equally amazing. All of the above applies to them.
7) Des and everyone else who has gotten completely fucked over- you have my love and my sympathy
8) I am not giving up without a fight
9) I'm pissed.
10) I've only just started.....
I’m not amused anymore
And nothing’s a muse anymore
I sing of love and of hate
But I’m just masturbating my soul
And I don’t want to live anymore
And I don’t want to give anymore
If I fawn, if I flirt, I just keep getting hurt
And it’s taken its toll
I wish I could fuck all my sorrow away
And fuck ’til the dawn of the next fucking day
Fuck the chorus and verse, fuck the pain getting worse
Fuck it all ’til I burn
I wish I could fuck all of you ’til you see
I’m the worst fuck up in all history
Fuck your image and mine, fuck your limp valentine
Fuck it all ’til I learn
I’m not a kid anymore
I don’t know what I did anymore
But on every damn pass, karma bushwacks my ass
And I get it all back
And I don’t want to move anymore
I’ve got nothing to prove anymore
If I run, if I sit, still it all turns to shit
Then it turns to attack
I wish I could fuck all the memory I keep
Fuck the next ten years and just go to sleep
I’m fucked if I do and I’m fucked if I say
I’m fucked if I don’t, so I’m fucked anyway
I wish I could fuck all of you ’til you see
I don’t need your mercyfuck sympathy
Fuck your word and your prayers, fuck your stares and my cares
Fuck it all ’til I learn
*What I have learned from this experience:
1) It doesn't matter how good you've been over the past, oh, 17 or so years of your life. No matter if this was the first time you've EVER gotten in trouble. No matter if you've been the IDEAL student- only ever getting 1 B in their entire life (an 89.4 at that...stupid Geometry). No matter that you've been kind, courteous, cooperative, TRUTHFUL, HONEST, and essintally a marvelous person. Nope. All of my hard work has obviously amounted to Jack Shit.
2) It doesn't matter if you tell the truth. Honesty is obviously never the best policy. It only gets you fucked over in the end. Nope, it is far better to lie. Because it makes perfect sense to punish those that tell the truth and own up to their mistakes.
3) Now that I've lost everything, and I've learned the valuable lessons from above- What the fuck do I have to lose?! They've taken away my extra curriculars (which are my life!). They've taken everything that could possibly mean something to me. They've proven that all my "good girl" activites are pointless. They've proven that actually having a conscience and moral standards is bullshit. So what's to stop me from going and partying next weekend?! I have nothing to lose. Because now I know the game. Go, have a blast, get drunk off my ass, get found out, lie about drinking, then get off scott-free. NOW I GET IT! Yes, that's MARVELOUS attitude. Great punishment. I sure did learn my lesson. *Wide toothy grin*
4) If SADD endorses these sorts of policies...I can't associate myself with them. I am willing to resign. This is ludicrous. Constructive possess is bullshit.
5) My parents are wonderful. Amazing. Marvelous. Stupendous. I couldn't love them more.
6) My friends are equally amazing. All of the above applies to them.
7) Des and everyone else who has gotten completely fucked over- you have my love and my sympathy
8) I am not giving up without a fight
9) I'm pissed.
10) I've only just started.....