The Guardian's Secret 23/?
Title: The Guardian's Secret 23/?
Author: Hezikiah
Disclaimer: Not mine, the BBC's.
Rating: PG
Characters: Ella (OC), Donna, Eighth Doctor, Tenth Doctor, Healer Koray (OC), Healer Akakios (OC)
Warnings: None
Summary: Sequel to " Witnessing the Protector," five years on. When the metacrisis begins to unravel on its own, a desperate Ella finds the Doctor...and winds up giving up more than she bargained for to save her best friend's life.
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22
Nov. 28, 2016
Donna's not quite dancing a jig, as Akakios predicted, but she's able to move around without needing the hoverchair too much. She's got a bad case of cabin fever and she really wants to leave the Medical Center. Akakios has told her that it will be at least another week before he feels confident enough to release her on a provisional basis.
There's plenty of Time Lords that want to have a look at her. Lord Halikor has denied everyone access to Donna, except for myself and the Doctor. Unfortunately, I heard Lord Nevisth attempted to make his way into her wing the other day, only to be met by two burly security guards. He tried to pull rank with them, but they told him they were under order from the Surgeon General himself, who outranks him when it comes to medical matters. I'm sure the dearest Lord High Inquisitor is just thrilled with being told “no.”
This afternoon Donna and I were sitting in the chairs by the windows while I attempted to put a crochet edge on the baby blanket (I'm miserable at crochet). Donna was helping me when Akakios appeared to do her daily evaluation. “Well, if it isn't Akakios! Ella, isn't that the name of a Greek island?”
“Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor of art history, not geography,” I replied in gruff voice, imitating Dr. McCoy. Donna cracked up laughing.
Akakios didn't get the joke, of course. “Ella, you don't sound so well. Are you feeling ill?” He gave me a worried glance as he reached into his tunic pocket for his scanner.
I responded in my normal voice, “I'm fine, Akakios. It's...oh, never mind. I was quoting a television show from earth. Don't worry about me.”
“Very well.” He turned to Donna and began running his scanner over her. She sighed and I could see the “I am so sick of this” look come over her face.
“When can I go outside?” she asked.
“Soon,” he replied as he studied the scanner.
“How soon?”
“Soon enough.”
“But why can't I go outside now?”
He glanced up at her. “It's not advisable yet.”
An irritated look came over her face. “Why? What's out there that could harm me? This is Gallifrey, Akakios, not Skaro, for goodness' sake! I can walk just fine now without much help. You told me yesterday that I'm physically fine. I want to go outside and see the suns. I'm tired of the stale air inside this room.”
“I'll go with her,” I volunteered. “Please, Akakios? Just out to the park?”
Akakios looked dubious, but then he relented. “I suppose...I don't have a good reason to keep you cooped up inside here anymore. I insist you take a guard with you, just for your protection. Too many people are curious about you and I don't want them asking questions that you might not be able to answer yet. Also, you're restricted to one hour outside.”
I could tell she wasn't thrilled about all the restrictions, but Donna wasn't about to argue now that she could escape from the Medical Center, at least on a temporary basis.
It was then that I had a really good idea. “How about a picnic?” I asked Donna. “I spotted a picnic basket in a cupboard in the TARDIS kitchen the other day.”
Her face lit up. “Oh yes, please! I have had it with the disgusting slop the Medical Center serves.”
I stood up and gathered my belongings. “I'll be back in a tick. Is there anything you want in particular?”
“Chocolate. I could murder a chocolate bar about now. I asked for some the other day and the nurse looked at me like I was bonkers.” She sniffed. “No chocolate on Gallifrey. And this place calls itself civilized.”
Laughing, I headed back to the ship and it didn't take me long to load up the basket with a few provisions from the storage bins. When I got back to Donna's room, she had already changed out of her pajamas into regular clothing (she was wrapped up in a black cardigan that I thought she'd like and I was right). She was also in the middle of a rather heated argument with Akakios about having to use the hoverchair. Donna didn't want to take it, but he was adamant that she use it just in case she became tired. “I'm not a bloody invalid!” she bellowed at him. “I'm tired of being treated like one!”
Akaios wasn't going to budge, though. “I know you're not, but I'd rather not have to carry you back up here. That would be embarrassing, for both of us.”
“You don't have to stay in it the whole time,” I added. “Just up and down. We can take your quilt so we can sit on the ground.”
Donna glanced at her patchwork quilt and I could tell she still wasn't happy, but she knew the only way she was going to go outside was to ride in the chair. “Oh, all right,” she grumbled in temporary mollification.
She settled into the chair and I handed her the basket. “Here, you can carry this.”
I folded the quilt while Donna flipped the lid up and poked her nose inside. “Are those crisps?” she gasped. “Real, proper crisps? And wine? And camembert? A whole charcuterie?! How posh! Ella, you're a doll.”
“Thank the Doctor. It's his pantry that I raided,” I replied as I handed her the quilt, gave the chair a shove, and guided her to door, waving at Akakios as we left. A guard outside stepped into place behind us and accompanied us down the lift.
It was the first time Donna had been downstairs and she squealed when she saw the TARDIS. “Take me over!” she commanded.
“Okay, but I can't let you inside,” I told her, glancing at the guard. He was already frowning, but he hadn't touched his staser. “The Council's forbidden it. In fact, the Doctor's probably going to have to move the ship out of the Medical Center now that you're mobile. They're afraid you'll pull a runner and escape.”
Donna snorted in laughter. “I would if I could, believe me. It makes sense, though, given his track record.” Her fingers brushed over the battered blue box and her voice grew wistful. “I've missed her so much. We have been through a lot together. She is the most beautiful ship in the universe.” I wasn't sure if she was slipping and referring herself as the Doctor again or if she was just recalling her previous adventures with the Tenth Doctor. Her eyes closed and she sighed. “I can hear her.”
That weirded me out a little. I mean, I know the Doctor has a nutty psychic symbiotic link or something with the ship. I didn't expect Donna to have the same. Maybe it has something to do with her having his memories, but I decided that was enough. Anyway, the guard had cleared his throat and I could tell he wasn't happy that we were so close to the ship. “We should get going or our time will be up,” I reminded her.
“Oh, all right.” Donna seemed reluctant to leave the TARDIS, though, and her eyes followed it until we left the building and went outside to the park. I chose a flat spot in the shade under one of the trees with the silver leaves. The full strength of the Gallifreyan suns still hurts my eyes if I'm outside too long without sunglasses and I hadn't brought them with me. I spread out the quilt and Donna sat down, leaned her back against the tree, and started pulling out the food. Our guard stood right next to us and I gave him a pointed look. “Do you mind giving us some space, please?”
“Healer Akakios said I was to accompany you and not let you out of my sight.”
Donna's eyes narrowed and I could tell she was about to tear into the poor guy, who was just doing his job. Her temper's been really short since she's been confined. “I understand that, but that doesn't mean you have to stand right next to us.” I pointed to a bench about fifty yards away. “We're still within sight if you sit over there. I'd appreciate some privacy, thanks.”
The guard frowned again, but nodded and tramped off and stood by the bench. He refused to sit, though.
I settled down on the quilt just as Donna popped the cork out of a bottle of wine. “Thanks for that. I've had enough of people not giving me space to breathe.”
“I don't know if it's going to get any better,” I admitted. “There's...well...there's a lot you need to know that I haven't told you.”
Donna raised an eyebrow, but didn't respond to that as she filled a wineglass. “None of this is for you, missy. Not while you're gestating my child.”
I smiled and shrugged. “It's cabernet, anyway. I hate that stuff. Too dry.”
“More for me!” she crowed and saluted me with her glass.
“Don't get toasted,” I warned her. “I don't know what Akakios would do to me if I brought you back three sheets to the wind.”
Donna just grinned at me. “Ah, but Time Lords can't get drunk. We can shrug off the effects of alcohol, except maybe for ginger beer.” She took a huge gulp of her wine.
“What?!” I exclaimed. “Oh, that's not fair!” I popped a piece of cheese in my mouth and opened the bottle of lemonade that I'd brought for myself to drink. “I think the Tenth Doctor said something about that to me, now that I think about it.”
“Lots of things aren't fair,” she answered and looked around her. “Like this mess that we're in right now. I've been in some bad situations before, but this one has got to be one of the worst. Do you and the Doctor have a plan?”
“No,” I admitted. “We've talked about some things, but we were waiting for you to wake up. We're not exactly alone, though. The Tenth Doctor spoke to me a few months ago...”
Her jaw dropped and she set the wine glass down with a small thud. “He did WHAT?!”
“Somnient time travel?” I asked. “Don't ask me how it works. Something about dreaming.”
“I know how it works,” she retorted, but then her indignant look vanished and she chuckled. “Spaceman. He's a clever one. What did he tell you?”
Tugging my phone out of my pocket, I pulled up the memo app I'd used to jot down the numbers. “Well, besides getting me drunk in my dreams, he told me to tell you these numbers and that they're important.” I touched my upper arm. “They have something to do with an implant he put in my arm right after the accident five years ago.”
Donna gave a quick glance at the numbers and I could see she'd already memorized them. “An implant? What's it for?”
I shook my head. “He wouldn't tell me. He said Akakios had told him to tell me to tell you. Do you have any idea what it could be?”
“No.” I could see her thinking, mulling over the information I'd just given her. “Those numbers don't mean anything to me. I'm sorry, Ella.”
“It's ok,” I answered. “They must come into play at some time because the Doctor was adamant that I relay them to you.”
“Then we'll just have to trust that he knows what he's doing.” She finished her wine and nibbled on a few crackers. “Did he tell you how this ends, what happens to us?”
I looked down into my lap at my lemonade. “I asked. He said he didn't know, but he also didn't say why he didn't know. He did tell me that the baby was ok for most of the pregnancy, but that he missed the end and doesn't know about the birth.”
“Hmm,” Donna mused. “That makes me think something in the future takes him away from here.”
“Maybe,” I answered. “He...he also warned me. He said things were about to get very nasty and to watch what I say and do around Healer Koray. He also told me the baby would have the mind of a Time Lord, but I didn't realize the he literally meant that until we discovered the baby's brain actually had that fifth lobe. I thought he meant that the baby would be just as smart as a Time Lord. He talked about another him, something about his counterpart, but I didn't know what he meant.”
A knowing look came into Donna's eyes and she half-smiled. “He meant the human Doctor. We left him in the other universe with Rose.”
“Who's Rose? And a human Doctor? How did that happen?!”
“She was another one of his companions, two before me. It's a really long story, though, best saved for another time. The human Doctor was created during the metacrisis, the same event that initially gave me the Doctor's memories, though they were dormant until Davros zapped me.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Someone has got to explain to me sometime what went down because I still don't know the whole story about the metacrisis. The Doctor never really explained it to me fully.”
“I'll have plenty of time to tell you the story once I've been released.” I knew she didn't want to waste her whole hour telling me about what must feel like ancient history to her. Donna unwrapped her chocolate bar and bit into it. “Do you know what's going to happen to me when I am released? I've asked Akakios but he claims he doesn't know. I don't think he's lying to me.”
I ran my thumb around the top of the lemonade bottle and looked down. “No,” I admitted. “I don't. There's a powerful Time Lord named Nevisth. He's the Lord High Inquisitor and...”
“Old fellow? Blue eyes?” she barked and I nodded. “I think I remember that bastard. The Doctor's had a few run-ins with him over the years. He's a right horse's arse, let me tell you.”
I busted out into laughter at her description of Nevisth. “I overheard him plotting to have you confined to the Medical Center indefinitely. He thinks you're some kind of threat to Gallifrey, but his ideas aren't very popular. You can't be confined because you're not insane and you're not a criminal. But...” I trailed off. I wasn't sure how to broach the next subject.
“But what?” Donna prompted.
Setting the bottle down, I sighed and continued. “You've been referring to yourself as “I” when talking about the Doctor's past. It seems like you're confusing the two of you and some people may use that as an excuse that you're mentally unstable. I know you're not, but you have to think about how you appear to other people. There's never been a Time Lord like you and there are many members of the Council who still don't quite believe that it's even possible. I've learned a lot about Lord Nevisth these past few months and I know he will use that to his advantage to keep you locked up in the Medical Center. You have to watch what you say, Donna. The Doctor and Akakios and I are all worried about you.”
Donna was silent and I was afraid that my words had angered her, but they hadn't. She just looked thoughtful as she contemplated my words. “It's difficult,” she finally said. “I can't help but refer to him as 'me' because he is me to a certain extent. The only reason I'm a Time Lord is because of his knowledge and experiences gleaned through his travels. It's very hard to separate myself from him sometimes.”
“But you're not the Doctor,” I insisted. “You're something new and you have to figure out what you are.”
Donna stared at me right then and the look in her eyes was so alien that for a moment I almost didn't recognize her, if that makes any sense. It was unsettling. “I am the Doctor Donna,” she responded. “It's going to take me a while to understand exactly what that means and I don't know how to start.”
“Stop referring to yourself as the Doctor,” I suggested, “because you're not him. You may have his memories, but you're two different people.”
“I can only try.”
“What's it like having his memories in your head?” I asked. I've got to admit that I've been curious about that.
Donna let out a breath of air. “Crowded,” she answered. “My head is so full, but there's still room for more. It's like...I remember everything about my human life on earth but it's so small compared to what I remember about the Doctor's lives. Maybe that's why I keep referring to him as myself because my life as a human was literally just a quick blip in all of the time that he's experienced. It tends to overwhelm everything else. At the same time, that human life is something I want to get back to because...because...” she trailed off, as if unsure what to say.
“Because it's who you are,” I finished. “Despite everything that's happened to you, you haven't forgotten about Shaun or your children. They're the center of your universe and nothing's going to stop you from getting back to them.” I took her hand. “You are the Doctor Donna, but you're also Donna Temple-Noble. The Doctor is different from you in that he doesn't have what you have. You have family that grounds you, but he doesn't. Use his knowledge that's banging around in that head of yours to find a way back to your family.”
My words made a small smile appear on her face. “I suppose that is the big difference between us. And I do intend to get back to Shaun and the kids no matter what it takes. I was serious when I said they can't keep me here. I've already got a few ideas, but unfortunately they'll have to wait a while. I'm just biding my time and waiting for the right opportunity.” She looked me in the eyes and her expression was one of complete seriousness. “And when it comes I want you to be ready, because I'm not leaving you or my baby behind.”
“I will. I don't want to stay here any more than you do.”
I guessed we had about a half an hour left before we had to go back inside, but I couldn't think of anything more to say to Donna. We lapsed into silence, something that's practically unheard of between the two of us. We both finished off the picnic basket without speaking a word to each other, occupied with our own thoughts. I'm afraid that we're starting to drift apart. I know that happens sometimes between friends, when they become too different. In some ways, Donna is still the same but she's also evolving into someone else, someone I don't know. I guess I was naive to expect her to stay the same after the conversion.
The baby started somersaulting inside of me. An active baby is a bit uncomfortable when you've got a stomach full of lunch and lemonade. My shifting around on the blanket and the sound of discomfort that I made attracted Donna's attention. She looked up and her pensive expression disappeared. Donna reached out and put a hand on my stomach without saying a word. She waited for several seconds until the baby tumbled back across my belly underneath her palm and she broke out into the biggest and saddest smile I ever saw. “Does she move a lot?”
“Yeah,” I answered. “More so in the last week or two. She started moving around the time you woke up, earlier than Bastian did.”
“That happens with second babies. You can often feel them moving earlier than your first. I'm pretty sure Peter's going to grow up to be a football player from all the kicking he...” her voice caught and tears started rolling down her face. “I miss them so much.”
I took her hand and squeezed it. “I know you do. I miss my boys, too.”
“This would be a lot harder if you weren't here, if you hadn't stayed,” she told me. “If the Doctor had just taken you back to earth instead of staying, if...” she stopped and looked away.
“If I'd chosen not to be a surrogate?” I finished her sentence. “I could have made that choice, but they still wouldn't have let me go back to earth. They took the Tenth Doctor's appointment of me as your guardian seriously and I was required to stay until you woke up. Really, everything happened so fast that I didn't have time to process what was going on until I was pregnant in a matter of hours and facing down a whole room full of confused and belligerent Time Lords.”
“I bet they didn't want to admit they were confused,” Donna snorted. “What do you think of them? The Time Lords, I mean?”
I glanced around and lowered my voice. “Some of them are ok, like Akakios and the Doctor, but most of them are a bunch of stuffy old noddies.”
Donna busted into laughter. “Oh my god, you are so right!” she chuckled and then stopped. “Wait, does that make me a stuffy old noddy?”
“Donna Temple-Noble, you are far from stuffy or old or a fool!” I replied. Donna just smiled.
I took a few moments and sketched a picture of her (which I finished later).
The guard started walking back towards us and I realized our time was coming to an end. “I supposed we'd better start packing up,” she sighed and began loading up the basket. I gave her a hand and in less than a minute we were ready to go. Donna was silent as I helped her back into the chair and pushed her back into the Medical Center. I knew she didn't want to go back in there and I couldn't blame her. I'm just as sick of that place as she is.
“The Doctor said something to me recently about taking a holiday, just the three of us,” I mentioned to her, trying to cheer her up.
“Off planet?”
“You know the Council wouldn't allow that,” I replied. “Wouldn't it be nice to see someplace besides the Medical Center and the Citadel?”
“Yes,” she sighed. “Maybe Lake Abydos. It's lovely.”
I had no idea what part of Gallifrey she was talking about, but I took her word for it. Akakios was waiting for us when we got back upstairs and hovered like a mother hen as Donna got out of the chair on her own and settled back on her bed. I hid a smile. He really is very protective of her and he started questioning her about her stamina, much to her annoyance. I dropped the quilt back on the end of the bed and waved as they started arguing...again...about some trivial matter.
The Doctor was waiting for me in the TARDIS, feet propped up on the footstool and reading So Long and Thanks for All the Fish by Douglas Adams. “Did you enjoy your picnic?” he asked, not looking up from his book.
“Yes.” I stopped in my tracks. “How did you...?”
He chuckled as he turned a page. “I saw you outside in the park when I was coming back from meeting over the latest results of the investigation of that Dalek eyestalk.” He glanced up. “The Council's scheduled a follow-up hearing over Donna next week, by the way.”
Ugh. I didn't want to deal with all those stuck-up old cronies again. “Am I required to be there?”
“Yep,” he answered, popping the “p,” just like the Tenth Doctor sometimes did. “So is Donna.”
“That's going to be interesting,” I replied. “And why do I have to go?”
“You must formally step down as her advocate since she has completed the conversion process and is well in body and mind.”
“Geez,” I sighed. “Can't I just write a letter or something?”
He tilted his head to his side. “You should know by now that the Time Lords love their rituals, Ella. It must be done in person and witnessed by the Council.” The Doctor's voice grew more grave. “They're also going to decide what to do with you for the long term.”
I wrapped my arms around myself and looked at the ground. “Do you really think they'll make me stay here permanently after the baby's born, as some kind of punishment for not being honest with them and for defying them all the time?”
“I don't know, Ella. It's hard to say. With all the attacks on Gallifrey I can't really read the mood of the Council that well anymore. There's so much turmoil going on that a large portion of the Council members have all but forgotten about you and Donna.”
“All but Lord Nevisth.”
“And he wants you to leave, Ella. He was all for sending you home, if you remember.”
I nodded. “Oh, I remember. He was also all for letting the baby die before the pregnancy was stabilized. He's still that way, from what I can tell.”
The Doctor closed his book and set it aside, sighing. “That's what worries me. I cannot conceive what he would gain from such animosity towards a unborn child. All I can surmise is that he has a deep hatred of anything that isn't a pure Time Lord. He barely tolerates Micah and probably only because of whose son he is. We know what he thinks of Donna. I imagine this baby represents everything he loathes and it doesn't help that it's ostensibly human, but has the best part of a Time Lord: the brain.”
“I'm worried that he's going to try to hurt the baby, but I don't know why or how he would.”
“I've had the same unfortunate thoughts," he told me. "I'm not going to let Nevisth hurt either of you, even if I have to keep you and the baby in the TARDIS until you deliver for your safety. That is a possibility, you know.”
“You mean deliver the baby on the TARDIS?” The thought hadn't even occurred to me.
My confusion seemed to amuse him and his eyes twinkled in laughter. “If necessary, yes.”
“I've already been confined on her once...” I trailed off and stopped. There goes my stupid tongue again.
The Doctor sat up straighter and looked shocked. “Did my future self imprison you in the TARDIS?”
“No!” I replied. “Not at all. It had to do with the accident. I wasn't well enough to be left alone, so he made me stay until I was better, that's all.”
“Oh,” he relaxed. “I see. I was beginning to worry that I'm going to turn psychotic in the future.”
His words made me smile. “I wouldn't say that. He's not a monster, Doctor.”
The Doctor looked doubtful. “Perhaps not...but some of the things I've heard that he does worries me.”
“Do you think your past incarnations would have the said the same of you, if they knew some of your exploits?”
That question made the Doctor crack up laughing, but I noticed he didn't answer my question and changed the subject, after his chuckles died down. “I'm going to have to give the Council an update on your progress. How is your project coming along?”
I glanced down at my stack of notes on the table. “I have about 25 pieces of art identified so far. I really need to visit Arcadia, though, and look through the art and history collections there.”
He nodded. “That's not too shabby. I'll arrange for transport after the Council meeting.”
“Ok, thanks.” I sat down at the table to start organizing all my research into a coherent order, but my mind couldn't focus and I tugged out my journal to write this entry instead.
I really hope everything goes well at the Council.
Oh yeah, I'm 22 weeks today:
Author: Hezikiah
Disclaimer: Not mine, the BBC's.
Rating: PG
Characters: Ella (OC), Donna, Eighth Doctor, Tenth Doctor, Healer Koray (OC), Healer Akakios (OC)
Warnings: None
Summary: Sequel to " Witnessing the Protector," five years on. When the metacrisis begins to unravel on its own, a desperate Ella finds the Doctor...and winds up giving up more than she bargained for to save her best friend's life.
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22
Nov. 28, 2016
Donna's not quite dancing a jig, as Akakios predicted, but she's able to move around without needing the hoverchair too much. She's got a bad case of cabin fever and she really wants to leave the Medical Center. Akakios has told her that it will be at least another week before he feels confident enough to release her on a provisional basis.
There's plenty of Time Lords that want to have a look at her. Lord Halikor has denied everyone access to Donna, except for myself and the Doctor. Unfortunately, I heard Lord Nevisth attempted to make his way into her wing the other day, only to be met by two burly security guards. He tried to pull rank with them, but they told him they were under order from the Surgeon General himself, who outranks him when it comes to medical matters. I'm sure the dearest Lord High Inquisitor is just thrilled with being told “no.”
This afternoon Donna and I were sitting in the chairs by the windows while I attempted to put a crochet edge on the baby blanket (I'm miserable at crochet). Donna was helping me when Akakios appeared to do her daily evaluation. “Well, if it isn't Akakios! Ella, isn't that the name of a Greek island?”
“Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor of art history, not geography,” I replied in gruff voice, imitating Dr. McCoy. Donna cracked up laughing.
Akakios didn't get the joke, of course. “Ella, you don't sound so well. Are you feeling ill?” He gave me a worried glance as he reached into his tunic pocket for his scanner.
I responded in my normal voice, “I'm fine, Akakios. It's...oh, never mind. I was quoting a television show from earth. Don't worry about me.”
“Very well.” He turned to Donna and began running his scanner over her. She sighed and I could see the “I am so sick of this” look come over her face.
“When can I go outside?” she asked.
“Soon,” he replied as he studied the scanner.
“How soon?”
“Soon enough.”
“But why can't I go outside now?”
He glanced up at her. “It's not advisable yet.”
An irritated look came over her face. “Why? What's out there that could harm me? This is Gallifrey, Akakios, not Skaro, for goodness' sake! I can walk just fine now without much help. You told me yesterday that I'm physically fine. I want to go outside and see the suns. I'm tired of the stale air inside this room.”
“I'll go with her,” I volunteered. “Please, Akakios? Just out to the park?”
Akakios looked dubious, but then he relented. “I suppose...I don't have a good reason to keep you cooped up inside here anymore. I insist you take a guard with you, just for your protection. Too many people are curious about you and I don't want them asking questions that you might not be able to answer yet. Also, you're restricted to one hour outside.”
I could tell she wasn't thrilled about all the restrictions, but Donna wasn't about to argue now that she could escape from the Medical Center, at least on a temporary basis.
It was then that I had a really good idea. “How about a picnic?” I asked Donna. “I spotted a picnic basket in a cupboard in the TARDIS kitchen the other day.”
Her face lit up. “Oh yes, please! I have had it with the disgusting slop the Medical Center serves.”
I stood up and gathered my belongings. “I'll be back in a tick. Is there anything you want in particular?”
“Chocolate. I could murder a chocolate bar about now. I asked for some the other day and the nurse looked at me like I was bonkers.” She sniffed. “No chocolate on Gallifrey. And this place calls itself civilized.”
Laughing, I headed back to the ship and it didn't take me long to load up the basket with a few provisions from the storage bins. When I got back to Donna's room, she had already changed out of her pajamas into regular clothing (she was wrapped up in a black cardigan that I thought she'd like and I was right). She was also in the middle of a rather heated argument with Akakios about having to use the hoverchair. Donna didn't want to take it, but he was adamant that she use it just in case she became tired. “I'm not a bloody invalid!” she bellowed at him. “I'm tired of being treated like one!”
Akaios wasn't going to budge, though. “I know you're not, but I'd rather not have to carry you back up here. That would be embarrassing, for both of us.”
“You don't have to stay in it the whole time,” I added. “Just up and down. We can take your quilt so we can sit on the ground.”
Donna glanced at her patchwork quilt and I could tell she still wasn't happy, but she knew the only way she was going to go outside was to ride in the chair. “Oh, all right,” she grumbled in temporary mollification.
She settled into the chair and I handed her the basket. “Here, you can carry this.”
I folded the quilt while Donna flipped the lid up and poked her nose inside. “Are those crisps?” she gasped. “Real, proper crisps? And wine? And camembert? A whole charcuterie?! How posh! Ella, you're a doll.”
“Thank the Doctor. It's his pantry that I raided,” I replied as I handed her the quilt, gave the chair a shove, and guided her to door, waving at Akakios as we left. A guard outside stepped into place behind us and accompanied us down the lift.
It was the first time Donna had been downstairs and she squealed when she saw the TARDIS. “Take me over!” she commanded.
“Okay, but I can't let you inside,” I told her, glancing at the guard. He was already frowning, but he hadn't touched his staser. “The Council's forbidden it. In fact, the Doctor's probably going to have to move the ship out of the Medical Center now that you're mobile. They're afraid you'll pull a runner and escape.”
Donna snorted in laughter. “I would if I could, believe me. It makes sense, though, given his track record.” Her fingers brushed over the battered blue box and her voice grew wistful. “I've missed her so much. We have been through a lot together. She is the most beautiful ship in the universe.” I wasn't sure if she was slipping and referring herself as the Doctor again or if she was just recalling her previous adventures with the Tenth Doctor. Her eyes closed and she sighed. “I can hear her.”
That weirded me out a little. I mean, I know the Doctor has a nutty psychic symbiotic link or something with the ship. I didn't expect Donna to have the same. Maybe it has something to do with her having his memories, but I decided that was enough. Anyway, the guard had cleared his throat and I could tell he wasn't happy that we were so close to the ship. “We should get going or our time will be up,” I reminded her.
“Oh, all right.” Donna seemed reluctant to leave the TARDIS, though, and her eyes followed it until we left the building and went outside to the park. I chose a flat spot in the shade under one of the trees with the silver leaves. The full strength of the Gallifreyan suns still hurts my eyes if I'm outside too long without sunglasses and I hadn't brought them with me. I spread out the quilt and Donna sat down, leaned her back against the tree, and started pulling out the food. Our guard stood right next to us and I gave him a pointed look. “Do you mind giving us some space, please?”
“Healer Akakios said I was to accompany you and not let you out of my sight.”
Donna's eyes narrowed and I could tell she was about to tear into the poor guy, who was just doing his job. Her temper's been really short since she's been confined. “I understand that, but that doesn't mean you have to stand right next to us.” I pointed to a bench about fifty yards away. “We're still within sight if you sit over there. I'd appreciate some privacy, thanks.”
The guard frowned again, but nodded and tramped off and stood by the bench. He refused to sit, though.
I settled down on the quilt just as Donna popped the cork out of a bottle of wine. “Thanks for that. I've had enough of people not giving me space to breathe.”
“I don't know if it's going to get any better,” I admitted. “There's...well...there's a lot you need to know that I haven't told you.”
Donna raised an eyebrow, but didn't respond to that as she filled a wineglass. “None of this is for you, missy. Not while you're gestating my child.”
I smiled and shrugged. “It's cabernet, anyway. I hate that stuff. Too dry.”
“More for me!” she crowed and saluted me with her glass.
“Don't get toasted,” I warned her. “I don't know what Akakios would do to me if I brought you back three sheets to the wind.”
Donna just grinned at me. “Ah, but Time Lords can't get drunk. We can shrug off the effects of alcohol, except maybe for ginger beer.” She took a huge gulp of her wine.
“What?!” I exclaimed. “Oh, that's not fair!” I popped a piece of cheese in my mouth and opened the bottle of lemonade that I'd brought for myself to drink. “I think the Tenth Doctor said something about that to me, now that I think about it.”
“Lots of things aren't fair,” she answered and looked around her. “Like this mess that we're in right now. I've been in some bad situations before, but this one has got to be one of the worst. Do you and the Doctor have a plan?”
“No,” I admitted. “We've talked about some things, but we were waiting for you to wake up. We're not exactly alone, though. The Tenth Doctor spoke to me a few months ago...”
Her jaw dropped and she set the wine glass down with a small thud. “He did WHAT?!”
“Somnient time travel?” I asked. “Don't ask me how it works. Something about dreaming.”
“I know how it works,” she retorted, but then her indignant look vanished and she chuckled. “Spaceman. He's a clever one. What did he tell you?”
Tugging my phone out of my pocket, I pulled up the memo app I'd used to jot down the numbers. “Well, besides getting me drunk in my dreams, he told me to tell you these numbers and that they're important.” I touched my upper arm. “They have something to do with an implant he put in my arm right after the accident five years ago.”
Donna gave a quick glance at the numbers and I could see she'd already memorized them. “An implant? What's it for?”
I shook my head. “He wouldn't tell me. He said Akakios had told him to tell me to tell you. Do you have any idea what it could be?”
“No.” I could see her thinking, mulling over the information I'd just given her. “Those numbers don't mean anything to me. I'm sorry, Ella.”
“It's ok,” I answered. “They must come into play at some time because the Doctor was adamant that I relay them to you.”
“Then we'll just have to trust that he knows what he's doing.” She finished her wine and nibbled on a few crackers. “Did he tell you how this ends, what happens to us?”
I looked down into my lap at my lemonade. “I asked. He said he didn't know, but he also didn't say why he didn't know. He did tell me that the baby was ok for most of the pregnancy, but that he missed the end and doesn't know about the birth.”
“Hmm,” Donna mused. “That makes me think something in the future takes him away from here.”
“Maybe,” I answered. “He...he also warned me. He said things were about to get very nasty and to watch what I say and do around Healer Koray. He also told me the baby would have the mind of a Time Lord, but I didn't realize the he literally meant that until we discovered the baby's brain actually had that fifth lobe. I thought he meant that the baby would be just as smart as a Time Lord. He talked about another him, something about his counterpart, but I didn't know what he meant.”
A knowing look came into Donna's eyes and she half-smiled. “He meant the human Doctor. We left him in the other universe with Rose.”
“Who's Rose? And a human Doctor? How did that happen?!”
“She was another one of his companions, two before me. It's a really long story, though, best saved for another time. The human Doctor was created during the metacrisis, the same event that initially gave me the Doctor's memories, though they were dormant until Davros zapped me.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Someone has got to explain to me sometime what went down because I still don't know the whole story about the metacrisis. The Doctor never really explained it to me fully.”
“I'll have plenty of time to tell you the story once I've been released.” I knew she didn't want to waste her whole hour telling me about what must feel like ancient history to her. Donna unwrapped her chocolate bar and bit into it. “Do you know what's going to happen to me when I am released? I've asked Akakios but he claims he doesn't know. I don't think he's lying to me.”
I ran my thumb around the top of the lemonade bottle and looked down. “No,” I admitted. “I don't. There's a powerful Time Lord named Nevisth. He's the Lord High Inquisitor and...”
“Old fellow? Blue eyes?” she barked and I nodded. “I think I remember that bastard. The Doctor's had a few run-ins with him over the years. He's a right horse's arse, let me tell you.”
I busted out into laughter at her description of Nevisth. “I overheard him plotting to have you confined to the Medical Center indefinitely. He thinks you're some kind of threat to Gallifrey, but his ideas aren't very popular. You can't be confined because you're not insane and you're not a criminal. But...” I trailed off. I wasn't sure how to broach the next subject.
“But what?” Donna prompted.
Setting the bottle down, I sighed and continued. “You've been referring to yourself as “I” when talking about the Doctor's past. It seems like you're confusing the two of you and some people may use that as an excuse that you're mentally unstable. I know you're not, but you have to think about how you appear to other people. There's never been a Time Lord like you and there are many members of the Council who still don't quite believe that it's even possible. I've learned a lot about Lord Nevisth these past few months and I know he will use that to his advantage to keep you locked up in the Medical Center. You have to watch what you say, Donna. The Doctor and Akakios and I are all worried about you.”
Donna was silent and I was afraid that my words had angered her, but they hadn't. She just looked thoughtful as she contemplated my words. “It's difficult,” she finally said. “I can't help but refer to him as 'me' because he is me to a certain extent. The only reason I'm a Time Lord is because of his knowledge and experiences gleaned through his travels. It's very hard to separate myself from him sometimes.”
“But you're not the Doctor,” I insisted. “You're something new and you have to figure out what you are.”
Donna stared at me right then and the look in her eyes was so alien that for a moment I almost didn't recognize her, if that makes any sense. It was unsettling. “I am the Doctor Donna,” she responded. “It's going to take me a while to understand exactly what that means and I don't know how to start.”
“Stop referring to yourself as the Doctor,” I suggested, “because you're not him. You may have his memories, but you're two different people.”
“I can only try.”
“What's it like having his memories in your head?” I asked. I've got to admit that I've been curious about that.
Donna let out a breath of air. “Crowded,” she answered. “My head is so full, but there's still room for more. It's like...I remember everything about my human life on earth but it's so small compared to what I remember about the Doctor's lives. Maybe that's why I keep referring to him as myself because my life as a human was literally just a quick blip in all of the time that he's experienced. It tends to overwhelm everything else. At the same time, that human life is something I want to get back to because...because...” she trailed off, as if unsure what to say.
“Because it's who you are,” I finished. “Despite everything that's happened to you, you haven't forgotten about Shaun or your children. They're the center of your universe and nothing's going to stop you from getting back to them.” I took her hand. “You are the Doctor Donna, but you're also Donna Temple-Noble. The Doctor is different from you in that he doesn't have what you have. You have family that grounds you, but he doesn't. Use his knowledge that's banging around in that head of yours to find a way back to your family.”
My words made a small smile appear on her face. “I suppose that is the big difference between us. And I do intend to get back to Shaun and the kids no matter what it takes. I was serious when I said they can't keep me here. I've already got a few ideas, but unfortunately they'll have to wait a while. I'm just biding my time and waiting for the right opportunity.” She looked me in the eyes and her expression was one of complete seriousness. “And when it comes I want you to be ready, because I'm not leaving you or my baby behind.”
“I will. I don't want to stay here any more than you do.”
I guessed we had about a half an hour left before we had to go back inside, but I couldn't think of anything more to say to Donna. We lapsed into silence, something that's practically unheard of between the two of us. We both finished off the picnic basket without speaking a word to each other, occupied with our own thoughts. I'm afraid that we're starting to drift apart. I know that happens sometimes between friends, when they become too different. In some ways, Donna is still the same but she's also evolving into someone else, someone I don't know. I guess I was naive to expect her to stay the same after the conversion.
The baby started somersaulting inside of me. An active baby is a bit uncomfortable when you've got a stomach full of lunch and lemonade. My shifting around on the blanket and the sound of discomfort that I made attracted Donna's attention. She looked up and her pensive expression disappeared. Donna reached out and put a hand on my stomach without saying a word. She waited for several seconds until the baby tumbled back across my belly underneath her palm and she broke out into the biggest and saddest smile I ever saw. “Does she move a lot?”
“Yeah,” I answered. “More so in the last week or two. She started moving around the time you woke up, earlier than Bastian did.”
“That happens with second babies. You can often feel them moving earlier than your first. I'm pretty sure Peter's going to grow up to be a football player from all the kicking he...” her voice caught and tears started rolling down her face. “I miss them so much.”
I took her hand and squeezed it. “I know you do. I miss my boys, too.”
“This would be a lot harder if you weren't here, if you hadn't stayed,” she told me. “If the Doctor had just taken you back to earth instead of staying, if...” she stopped and looked away.
“If I'd chosen not to be a surrogate?” I finished her sentence. “I could have made that choice, but they still wouldn't have let me go back to earth. They took the Tenth Doctor's appointment of me as your guardian seriously and I was required to stay until you woke up. Really, everything happened so fast that I didn't have time to process what was going on until I was pregnant in a matter of hours and facing down a whole room full of confused and belligerent Time Lords.”
“I bet they didn't want to admit they were confused,” Donna snorted. “What do you think of them? The Time Lords, I mean?”
I glanced around and lowered my voice. “Some of them are ok, like Akakios and the Doctor, but most of them are a bunch of stuffy old noddies.”
Donna busted into laughter. “Oh my god, you are so right!” she chuckled and then stopped. “Wait, does that make me a stuffy old noddy?”
“Donna Temple-Noble, you are far from stuffy or old or a fool!” I replied. Donna just smiled.
I took a few moments and sketched a picture of her (which I finished later).
The guard started walking back towards us and I realized our time was coming to an end. “I supposed we'd better start packing up,” she sighed and began loading up the basket. I gave her a hand and in less than a minute we were ready to go. Donna was silent as I helped her back into the chair and pushed her back into the Medical Center. I knew she didn't want to go back in there and I couldn't blame her. I'm just as sick of that place as she is.
“The Doctor said something to me recently about taking a holiday, just the three of us,” I mentioned to her, trying to cheer her up.
“Off planet?”
“You know the Council wouldn't allow that,” I replied. “Wouldn't it be nice to see someplace besides the Medical Center and the Citadel?”
“Yes,” she sighed. “Maybe Lake Abydos. It's lovely.”
I had no idea what part of Gallifrey she was talking about, but I took her word for it. Akakios was waiting for us when we got back upstairs and hovered like a mother hen as Donna got out of the chair on her own and settled back on her bed. I hid a smile. He really is very protective of her and he started questioning her about her stamina, much to her annoyance. I dropped the quilt back on the end of the bed and waved as they started arguing...again...about some trivial matter.
The Doctor was waiting for me in the TARDIS, feet propped up on the footstool and reading So Long and Thanks for All the Fish by Douglas Adams. “Did you enjoy your picnic?” he asked, not looking up from his book.
“Yes.” I stopped in my tracks. “How did you...?”
He chuckled as he turned a page. “I saw you outside in the park when I was coming back from meeting over the latest results of the investigation of that Dalek eyestalk.” He glanced up. “The Council's scheduled a follow-up hearing over Donna next week, by the way.”
Ugh. I didn't want to deal with all those stuck-up old cronies again. “Am I required to be there?”
“Yep,” he answered, popping the “p,” just like the Tenth Doctor sometimes did. “So is Donna.”
“That's going to be interesting,” I replied. “And why do I have to go?”
“You must formally step down as her advocate since she has completed the conversion process and is well in body and mind.”
“Geez,” I sighed. “Can't I just write a letter or something?”
He tilted his head to his side. “You should know by now that the Time Lords love their rituals, Ella. It must be done in person and witnessed by the Council.” The Doctor's voice grew more grave. “They're also going to decide what to do with you for the long term.”
I wrapped my arms around myself and looked at the ground. “Do you really think they'll make me stay here permanently after the baby's born, as some kind of punishment for not being honest with them and for defying them all the time?”
“I don't know, Ella. It's hard to say. With all the attacks on Gallifrey I can't really read the mood of the Council that well anymore. There's so much turmoil going on that a large portion of the Council members have all but forgotten about you and Donna.”
“All but Lord Nevisth.”
“And he wants you to leave, Ella. He was all for sending you home, if you remember.”
I nodded. “Oh, I remember. He was also all for letting the baby die before the pregnancy was stabilized. He's still that way, from what I can tell.”
The Doctor closed his book and set it aside, sighing. “That's what worries me. I cannot conceive what he would gain from such animosity towards a unborn child. All I can surmise is that he has a deep hatred of anything that isn't a pure Time Lord. He barely tolerates Micah and probably only because of whose son he is. We know what he thinks of Donna. I imagine this baby represents everything he loathes and it doesn't help that it's ostensibly human, but has the best part of a Time Lord: the brain.”
“I'm worried that he's going to try to hurt the baby, but I don't know why or how he would.”
“I've had the same unfortunate thoughts," he told me. "I'm not going to let Nevisth hurt either of you, even if I have to keep you and the baby in the TARDIS until you deliver for your safety. That is a possibility, you know.”
“You mean deliver the baby on the TARDIS?” The thought hadn't even occurred to me.
My confusion seemed to amuse him and his eyes twinkled in laughter. “If necessary, yes.”
“I've already been confined on her once...” I trailed off and stopped. There goes my stupid tongue again.
The Doctor sat up straighter and looked shocked. “Did my future self imprison you in the TARDIS?”
“No!” I replied. “Not at all. It had to do with the accident. I wasn't well enough to be left alone, so he made me stay until I was better, that's all.”
“Oh,” he relaxed. “I see. I was beginning to worry that I'm going to turn psychotic in the future.”
His words made me smile. “I wouldn't say that. He's not a monster, Doctor.”
The Doctor looked doubtful. “Perhaps not...but some of the things I've heard that he does worries me.”
“Do you think your past incarnations would have the said the same of you, if they knew some of your exploits?”
That question made the Doctor crack up laughing, but I noticed he didn't answer my question and changed the subject, after his chuckles died down. “I'm going to have to give the Council an update on your progress. How is your project coming along?”
I glanced down at my stack of notes on the table. “I have about 25 pieces of art identified so far. I really need to visit Arcadia, though, and look through the art and history collections there.”
He nodded. “That's not too shabby. I'll arrange for transport after the Council meeting.”
“Ok, thanks.” I sat down at the table to start organizing all my research into a coherent order, but my mind couldn't focus and I tugged out my journal to write this entry instead.
I really hope everything goes well at the Council.
Oh yeah, I'm 22 weeks today: