im sick of being heart broken
well i have had quite a bit of stuff happen to me now im sick of feeling like shit i want so bad to be happy and it never works out for all you that know me and what i use to do to my self when she dumped me i held it there but didnt do anything its not worth it she ment / means alot to me still i cant get her out of my head jordan i know this may husrt but i need to say it and get it off my chest sorry. now i know that i do like jordan a lot and i miss becky a lot but right now i dont know what i want so for right now i want to be single and be able to do what i want when i want with who i want and fo rall u guys who have ur mind in the gutter get it out i dont mean in that way like i told becky i dont regret anything ive done with her or anyone else (there is a reason i typed it that way ........for a person and you know who u are ) but i want the kind of girl that makes me feel like im there everythin g no i dont want you to worship the ground i walk but i want to know that you care and your happy with me i havent had it yet except certain times but they disapeared so im a guy who wants a reall relationship not just a dateing around kind im just sick of trusting some one then haveing everything slammed in my face and thats for two people and again you know who u are but right now i dont know what i want so i dont want anyone to be in a relation ship with i cant stand being held with out the care being there and i cant stand to not be held i like being with some one it helps me through stuff but people need to learn to trust me and respect what i say and this isnt directed streight at you becky this is for jordan too i still have feelings that i will lose you the same way and it will be hard fo me to trust u but i cant even really trust my closest friend right now and the friendship we had will never be the same but i want it to so if u need to talk u know my number i might talk i might not dont take affence to it but right now i have so much shit in my head im trying to clear it so if you need ot talk call me or even if you want to talk and if i need to i will call someone.