(no subject)
i got sick of looking at the picture that was here
My name's Kaleigh Sullivan and I don't get along with pretty much anyone. & I know you don't care because I don't care either. I throw things when I get mad and I randomly start to hate people on certain days, but I keep quiet about it because it creates unwanted drama. I really don't know why I'm such a messed up person. I have 29875438653296543 different moods and I never cry anymore. Sometimes I want to cry, but I just don't. I feel empty, with no emotions. I want to be the only one in the entire world who is awake right now. Is it wrong to not care if someone can relate to you? Or even be annoyed by it? I don't think any two people in the world have had the exact same feeling(s) ever. I wish that I was a beautiful person. I'm such a bitch though, and I don't treat people the way they deserve to be treated. It shows on my face, and on my smile. You might as well write every little thing I've ever done wrong on my face, but there isn't enough room. Late at night, my voice starts to get cracky and it sounds like I'm sick, and my eyes start to burn. I'm sure it happens to someone else as well, and that really bothers me. I want to just daydream about what my life could be like all day long, but I hear daydreaming causes alstymers. i tried my best not to stare at you, and it worked. for a little while at least. i wanted so much to walk over to you, and ask what was wrong, but my feet just wouldnt move. when those girls took my idea, i couldnt watch. i didnt know any of them and still i wanted to throw them to the ground. i feel like my feelings that night, and all the nights could have been so much stronger, but who knows. i remember the way the sky looked, and what you were wearing, and how the wind felt when it glided in between my fingers, but i have no clue what we talked about. i can remember bits and pieces, and what you said at the end of the night, but nothing else. and im still aching to know what you said while i was slamming the door. "nevermind." i should have made you tell me, but i walked away. it was propably nothing. He made me feel alive, even though I went through so much with him. But it was all worth it, it shaped me. It made me who I am, and yeah, I'm not thrilled with myself, but because who I am has to do with him, it makes it a little okay I guess. I just never want cuddling on a couch with someone to be no big deal. That has nothing to do with anything. Why do I have to be so hopeless? Why do I have to want what I can't have? Why did she have to say that to me, cause now I won't let it go. I don't go for normal guys? "They're too out of reach," she said. I'm not good enough for the ones I want. I'm not pretty, or skinny, or funny, or cute, or smart enough for, anyone maybe. Someone that I care about deserves so much more than me. I still kind of wish I could stop caring, about everything, and just live my life. No distractions. That's what he has become, my worst distraction. I just don't want to wonder where he is ten years from now. I want to not care. I know that will never happen though, and I'm okay with it. I think I'd be even more miserable if I just stopped caring. You have no idea how much I love the cure. It's fucking crazy. They like, remind me of everything and nothing at the same time. My heart feels like it's smiling, but not nessecasrily in a happy way. I LOVE ANNIE. I love her so so so so much. & ALLIE. & LAUREN. I love my best friends. They are just so amazing, and I don't think I could live without them. I can't explain anything. I hate words. Facial expressions and things you do say so much more than words ever could, to me anyway. I can't decide whether I hate this update with everything I have, or I don't mind it. Either way, I'll do my best to not get in a mood and erase it. I guess I'm okay, and maybe that's all I'll ever be.
you're such a strange girl, i'd like to shake you around and around.
My name's Kaleigh Sullivan and I don't get along with pretty much anyone. & I know you don't care because I don't care either. I throw things when I get mad and I randomly start to hate people on certain days, but I keep quiet about it because it creates unwanted drama. I really don't know why I'm such a messed up person. I have 29875438653296543 different moods and I never cry anymore. Sometimes I want to cry, but I just don't. I feel empty, with no emotions. I want to be the only one in the entire world who is awake right now. Is it wrong to not care if someone can relate to you? Or even be annoyed by it? I don't think any two people in the world have had the exact same feeling(s) ever. I wish that I was a beautiful person. I'm such a bitch though, and I don't treat people the way they deserve to be treated. It shows on my face, and on my smile. You might as well write every little thing I've ever done wrong on my face, but there isn't enough room. Late at night, my voice starts to get cracky and it sounds like I'm sick, and my eyes start to burn. I'm sure it happens to someone else as well, and that really bothers me. I want to just daydream about what my life could be like all day long, but I hear daydreaming causes alstymers. i tried my best not to stare at you, and it worked. for a little while at least. i wanted so much to walk over to you, and ask what was wrong, but my feet just wouldnt move. when those girls took my idea, i couldnt watch. i didnt know any of them and still i wanted to throw them to the ground. i feel like my feelings that night, and all the nights could have been so much stronger, but who knows. i remember the way the sky looked, and what you were wearing, and how the wind felt when it glided in between my fingers, but i have no clue what we talked about. i can remember bits and pieces, and what you said at the end of the night, but nothing else. and im still aching to know what you said while i was slamming the door. "nevermind." i should have made you tell me, but i walked away. it was propably nothing. He made me feel alive, even though I went through so much with him. But it was all worth it, it shaped me. It made me who I am, and yeah, I'm not thrilled with myself, but because who I am has to do with him, it makes it a little okay I guess. I just never want cuddling on a couch with someone to be no big deal. That has nothing to do with anything. Why do I have to be so hopeless? Why do I have to want what I can't have? Why did she have to say that to me, cause now I won't let it go. I don't go for normal guys? "They're too out of reach," she said. I'm not good enough for the ones I want. I'm not pretty, or skinny, or funny, or cute, or smart enough for, anyone maybe. Someone that I care about deserves so much more than me. I still kind of wish I could stop caring, about everything, and just live my life. No distractions. That's what he has become, my worst distraction. I just don't want to wonder where he is ten years from now. I want to not care. I know that will never happen though, and I'm okay with it. I think I'd be even more miserable if I just stopped caring. You have no idea how much I love the cure. It's fucking crazy. They like, remind me of everything and nothing at the same time. My heart feels like it's smiling, but not nessecasrily in a happy way. I LOVE ANNIE. I love her so so so so much. & ALLIE. & LAUREN. I love my best friends. They are just so amazing, and I don't think I could live without them. I can't explain anything. I hate words. Facial expressions and things you do say so much more than words ever could, to me anyway. I can't decide whether I hate this update with everything I have, or I don't mind it. Either way, I'll do my best to not get in a mood and erase it. I guess I'm okay, and maybe that's all I'll ever be.
you're such a strange girl, i'd like to shake you around and around.