Yes, I have been driven back to LJ
Sometimes, I honestly feel like everyone in the world is stupid. There are only a few people that are making me feel this way, but I'm just so angry and frustrated that I want to bite everyone's heads off.
People expect you to do what they want, even if it makes you miserable. I was expected to continue dating Nick, even though I had lost feelings for him. I'm being treated like I killed someone. I would think that it would be worse to lead him on and continue dating him and telling him that I loved him when I didn't. But apparently it's better to lie. Hm, strange. I understand how he would be upset that I'm dating David. It all happened so fast, but our relationship is not something that I can let pass by or put on hold. It just feels too right. It's not fair to me to halt my happiness just to make other people happy.
There are only three people in this world that have any right to be upset at me. Two of them aren't, which is a miracle in itself. But there are three others that are giving me the cold shoulder. People that were supposed to be my friends. People that are not involved or affected by this situation at all. I think they just need someone to hate and since Nick seems to, they're all going to. Even Jeremy's apparent hatred for me is almost acceptable, since he is Nick's best friend. It's Ashby and Celeste that really make me angry. This has nothing to do with them. I especially don't see how this can "sicken" Celeste when she has messed around with both Ryan AND David (two best friends) and led on Jer AND Ashby (two close friends). People just don't make sense. It's hypocritical and ridiculous. If all of this cools off and they want to be my friend again, I don't know if I could. I honestly don't think that I deserve any of this. Friends aren't supposed to pick sides or judge. None of them even asked for my side of the story. Oh well, I guess it's time to cut my losses and let go.
I know that this is all going to be worth it.
People expect you to do what they want, even if it makes you miserable. I was expected to continue dating Nick, even though I had lost feelings for him. I'm being treated like I killed someone. I would think that it would be worse to lead him on and continue dating him and telling him that I loved him when I didn't. But apparently it's better to lie. Hm, strange. I understand how he would be upset that I'm dating David. It all happened so fast, but our relationship is not something that I can let pass by or put on hold. It just feels too right. It's not fair to me to halt my happiness just to make other people happy.
There are only three people in this world that have any right to be upset at me. Two of them aren't, which is a miracle in itself. But there are three others that are giving me the cold shoulder. People that were supposed to be my friends. People that are not involved or affected by this situation at all. I think they just need someone to hate and since Nick seems to, they're all going to. Even Jeremy's apparent hatred for me is almost acceptable, since he is Nick's best friend. It's Ashby and Celeste that really make me angry. This has nothing to do with them. I especially don't see how this can "sicken" Celeste when she has messed around with both Ryan AND David (two best friends) and led on Jer AND Ashby (two close friends). People just don't make sense. It's hypocritical and ridiculous. If all of this cools off and they want to be my friend again, I don't know if I could. I honestly don't think that I deserve any of this. Friends aren't supposed to pick sides or judge. None of them even asked for my side of the story. Oh well, I guess it's time to cut my losses and let go.
I know that this is all going to be worth it.