(no subject)
it's killing me inside
i want it to stop
you've hurt me so many times before
but it's different this time
this time it's not cuz you left me
but because you're with me
everytime i'm near you
i feel like you want her
and i can't stand it
everyone, they say
you've got him
not her
i may have your body
but do i have your heart?
it's not that i don't love you
quite the contrary
my love for you will never stop
but when i'm with you
i can't help but face the truth
you use me, over and over again
and i keep coming back for more
to hurt myself?
i don't honestly know
i just know i can't quite get over you
and it's killing me inside
esh....i hate everything. suicide would be the perfect answer right now....everything is too overwhelming to deal with....but i don't have the guts. everyone says it's the cowards way out, but i was thinking...can you honestly look at the future, without you being there? can you imagine not getting married, or going to college? not having kids....missing all those parties and everything that makes life liveable? i couldn't...i can't think about my family going on without me, my friends acting like i never existed....so for some people it might be a cowardly thing to do, but for me, it takes a lot of courage to do it. and i for one hope i never get that kind of courage.
right now, it's impossible for me to feel emotion. i've cried it all out.
and please don't think this is all about one person. cuz it definatly is not...