fine...here's my blog graham....
But really its for everyone...
Its been a crazy few months. Summer simply flew by for me. It seems like spring quarter JUST ended...but apparently, that is long gone.
I'm finally starting to get comfortable with who I am, and what I want to be. Right now, I have one single goal: to get into Stanford for graduate school in computational mathematics and engineering. Now while this is inplausible, it is not impossible persay. Right now, my grades aren't high enough, my research experience isn't sufficient, and my professor recommendations are nonexistent. But I still have a year to apply (I'm planning on graduating in spring 2011). That means this academic year is going to be incredably difficult. I'm taking a graduate level math course, real analysis, and operating systems. I NEED an A (not an A-), in all those classes for Stanford to even look at me. If I set my mind to it, I know I can do it.
I'm dating a new guy...Ok, I have a new boyfriend. He's great. He's cute, funny, nice, intelligent, and absolutely crazy about me. He listens to me vent about math club, my grades, my roommates, everything. He validates me: he tells me I'm beautiful, that I'm smart, he takes me out so I don't stress out too much. He wants to meet my mother. I already met his parents. Everything seems pretty perfect?
Except, I'm not completely happy. I was finally starting to get closure on my previous boyfriend, I was enjoying the single life, and I was taking care of my own problems without someone else holding my hand through the way. For the first time in my life, I was happy being completely independent. But now, just when I have the relationship I've always wanted, I'm not "jumping in." I'm trying to take it slow, create a little more distance between us. Don't get me wrong, I really like him. I really see myself having a future with him, but I'm scared to mess it up, and I'm actually scared of opening up (which is a new concept if you know me well).
I'm having a bit of roommate trouble, too. I've had the same roommate since freshman year. She's amazing, we hit it off from the start. We've been best friends since we met on move in day. But, somehow, I feel like that honeymoon is over. Recently, after she made some other friends and adopted an adorable puppy, we've frown apart. I've been noticing little things that bother me about her, and I think she feels the same with me. I've become more of a neat freak and I find myself constantly cleaning up after her, and the dog. With the little time I have away from school, the last thing I want to do is come home and clean up. Not to mention I feel like she "replaced" me with one of her dog park friends. I hate to admit it, but I'm the slightest bit jealous.
I guess things are just changing.
Its been a crazy few months. Summer simply flew by for me. It seems like spring quarter JUST ended...but apparently, that is long gone.
I'm finally starting to get comfortable with who I am, and what I want to be. Right now, I have one single goal: to get into Stanford for graduate school in computational mathematics and engineering. Now while this is inplausible, it is not impossible persay. Right now, my grades aren't high enough, my research experience isn't sufficient, and my professor recommendations are nonexistent. But I still have a year to apply (I'm planning on graduating in spring 2011). That means this academic year is going to be incredably difficult. I'm taking a graduate level math course, real analysis, and operating systems. I NEED an A (not an A-), in all those classes for Stanford to even look at me. If I set my mind to it, I know I can do it.
I'm dating a new guy...Ok, I have a new boyfriend. He's great. He's cute, funny, nice, intelligent, and absolutely crazy about me. He listens to me vent about math club, my grades, my roommates, everything. He validates me: he tells me I'm beautiful, that I'm smart, he takes me out so I don't stress out too much. He wants to meet my mother. I already met his parents. Everything seems pretty perfect?
Except, I'm not completely happy. I was finally starting to get closure on my previous boyfriend, I was enjoying the single life, and I was taking care of my own problems without someone else holding my hand through the way. For the first time in my life, I was happy being completely independent. But now, just when I have the relationship I've always wanted, I'm not "jumping in." I'm trying to take it slow, create a little more distance between us. Don't get me wrong, I really like him. I really see myself having a future with him, but I'm scared to mess it up, and I'm actually scared of opening up (which is a new concept if you know me well).
I'm having a bit of roommate trouble, too. I've had the same roommate since freshman year. She's amazing, we hit it off from the start. We've been best friends since we met on move in day. But, somehow, I feel like that honeymoon is over. Recently, after she made some other friends and adopted an adorable puppy, we've frown apart. I've been noticing little things that bother me about her, and I think she feels the same with me. I've become more of a neat freak and I find myself constantly cleaning up after her, and the dog. With the little time I have away from school, the last thing I want to do is come home and clean up. Not to mention I feel like she "replaced" me with one of her dog park friends. I hate to admit it, but I'm the slightest bit jealous.
I guess things are just changing.