Oct 13, 2009 23:03
"Not being able to trust anyone is central to complex PTSD."
When you have a fragile baby deer, a fawn, who had been terrorized her whole short life, what do you do?
Her mom killed by a hunter and she herself was wounded.
She runs away from people, but then you friend her.
You listen to her cries.
You marvel at the beauty of her soul. She slowly learns to trust people again.
Slowly but surely she lets you hold her, embrace her and all her past nightmares disappeared.
But then one day you tire of her.
Too much work.
Sure, she is a beautiful deer, but she's older now and you don't want to have to deal with responsibiity.
So you grow cruel to her, even through illnesses she has.
You lie to her, saying you love her while at the same time you are picking up a rifle to hunt other deer like her.
How can she believe she is special anymore when she is just one of many anonymous deer down the barrel of your gun.
You never took a gun to shoot her, but she felt the near fatal bullet of betrayal enter her heart over and over again.
She heard your lies.
The deer wants to say thank you for showing her the truth.
Hunters and deer should not mingle.
She has to flee from his lies for her own sanity
While he constructs more walls of justifications that perhaps he uses so often that he believes them
She hears that is rather common.
And a man who betrays the thing he claimed to love the most is quite a common man.
Nothing special there.
Still, the lesson learned is disturbing, even to her.
The poor deer may never be able to bring her defenses down ever sgain. How can she when every man she meets is secretly or outrightly wearing camoflauge...ready to hunt..and it could happen anywhere at any time.
Moral of the story:
Never trust hunters if you are a deer.