France
parked his car in front of Belgium’s house, half on the pavement and half off it,
turned off the contact, and tried to muster up the courage to walk from the
safety of the vehicle to the front door. It was pouring outside; the rain was
so thick he could only just make out the branches of the oak tree that stood in
Belgium’s front lawn, a somber mass of leaves against an even darker sky. Not
that the weather in Paris had been much better - the parade on the 14th
had turned out to be a disaster.
Sighing, he
briefly leant his forehead against his steering wheel and then reached into the
back seat for his coat and umbrella.
A short
struggle with buckles and seatbelts ensued, and then he had slammed the car
door behind him and was hurrying towards the hazy shape of the pavilion.
--
He was, as
usual, late, but Belgium had counted on that; even as a young nation, he had
never had the utmost respect for punctuality, and he was only getting worse
with age - and as she was not the type to keep fighting a losing battle just
for the sake of it, she contented herself with telling him to be there by one
when she really meant two.
It was,
however, two thirty, as the old clock ticking away in a corner of the kitchen
informed her, and she was starting to wonder if he had been kept in Paris by an
emergency. Or maybe he had taken one look at the weather, and decided to cancel
their afternoon? It would not be unlike him, after all.
She flicked
her wrist a bit harder than necessary at that thought and the bowl she was
holding skidded a few centimeters to the left, coming to a halt perilously
close to the kitchen sink, and she was considering it dispassionately - maybe she shouldn’t have added so much milk?
- when the doorbell rang.
Typical. It was as if he’d sensed she was thinking
about him. She pulled her hair out of its ponytail, wrenched her apron off, and
headed towards the entry hallway.
France
swept in as soon as she had opened the front door, closing his umbrella in a
cascade of rainwater, and greeted her by ushering her with wild gestures of his
hands -
“The door,
the door, what are you thinking!” he yelped in quite an undignified manner.
“Yes, yes,”
she answered amusedly, and watched him flail on the spot. His fashionable
overcoat seemed completely soaked through; his shoes were awash; his hair
frizzing wildly at the temples - he cut, in short, a rather pathetic figure,
for someone who prided himself on the distinction of his appearance. She wished
she could take a picture, for posterity.
“I’m sure
this is very funny,” France snapped, correctly interpreting her stare, once she
had complied and closed the offending door.
“It is,”
she assured him, and he gave a fake, sarcastic laugh which prompted a true one
from her in return. “Oh, France, I’d give you a hug, but as you see -“
They
contented themselves with kissing each other once on each cheek, Belgium unable
to stop giggling as she attempted to avoid any contact other than that of their
faces, and she felt sure that France had to stop the corner of his lips from
turning up. It was, after all, a rather comical situation.
“Well,
that’s not all,” he said once they had drawn apart, “But I’m sure you’ll want
to avoid me dripping all over your kitchen floor…”
“And over
the cooking bowl.”
“The most
important thing,” he agreed. “ -- Except for my shoes, they must be ruined and
they were terribly expensive. Real Italian leather, sewed in Florence - they
were Veneziano’s gift to me last Christmas.”
There was a
pout in his voice, sulky and wobbly, and Belgium had to restrain from rolling
her eyes.
“I’m sure
you have ten other pairs you never wear anyhow. This’ll give you a chance to do
exactly that!”
France had
the gall to look offended and opened his mouth to answer, but she cut him off
before he could launch into a tirade about the difference between shoes of
French and Italian cut. “And I won’t apologize for my weather, so don’t even
try. Now come on, take those off!”
He grumbled
and complained all the way to the buanderie,
where she hung up his coat, jacket, shoes and socks so that they would dry - if
not under the sun, at least in the heavy warmth of the radiator - and looked
him over critically. He was barefoot and shivering slightly, and she gave a
snort - Parisians.
“It’s
autumn here!” he defended himself, and added something under his breath about
terrible weather which she chose to ignore.
“We’re not
having the best of summers, true - but it’s better like this than like Russia,
isn’t it?”
She saw
something slipping over his face right then - frustration or worry, it was hard
to tell - and then it was gone, as quickly as it had appeared.
“Oh, don’t
talk to me of Russia!”
“Had a fall
out?” she asked, biting her lip to hide her smile.
“He’s being
rather stupidly proud -- mine is the first help he’s accepted, do you realize?
And I can’t even send that much.” He exhaled sharply, a sure sign of
irritation. “Well, anyhow.”
There was a
full-stop in the way he pronounced the last two words, and she decided not to
press the issue - try to question France against his will, and he would just
slip in your grasp, turning the conversation around until it was hard to
remember what you wanted to ask him in the first place.
“I’ve think
I might have some of Netherland’s old stuff somewhere, if you want,” she offered
instead, and although he pulled a face which suggested he had just bitten into
a very sour lemon, he accepted.
--
“Now,
though I do rather appreciate the comfort your chair offers my posterior, I
hate to see you hurrying about the kitchen without doing anything,” France
remarked once he had sat down at her table.
“Oh, really?” Belgium retorted with a
mischievous smile, giving a little jingle of her behind for emphasis. “It’s a
pity; I thought you might enjoy the view.”
This caused
him to chuckle, and her smile to widen around the finger she was licking - much
too sweet, she instantly decreed; France would pronounce it a murder on his
tastebuds. He didn’t like pastry that was too sweet.
As if
answering her thoughts, he mock-sighed and said, “Alas, you know me too well.
But it would have been inconsiderate of me not to ask.”
Flour, now.
She measured the precise quantity under France’s watchful gaze, poured it into
the mixing bowl almost religiously. Baking was an art of precision; he knew
this as well as her.
Once she
had done so, she turned to face him, hand on her hip, fully intent on telling
him he had better earn his keep if he wanted to get his slice of the cake, but
she was taken aback by his smirk. Before she could open her mouth, he reached
up to wipe at her cheek with a handkerchief he had produced out of his pocket,
seemingly by magic.
Belgium half-heartedly whacked his arm away.
“You had
flour on your face,” he explained, blond eyebrow curved questioningly with an
elegance which had probably taken centuries to perfect.
Trying hard
not to get distracted by the mental image of sixteenth century France preening
himself in front of the first glass mirror, Belgium ploughed on.
“You didn’t
actually ask me if you could help. I was going to say yes.”
“Good,” he
purred, and wrapped an arm around her waist, drawing her to him. “So can we
have sex?”
He received
another whack for that remark, and laughed.
“You know
what I meant, you idiot. Go chop the apples.”
She pushed
against him playfully, but he held firm, blue gaze planted into hers; earnest
and laughing, imploring and mocking all at once.
“Is that a
yes or a no?”
“A no, of
course!” she laughed, and twisted away from his grasp.
France
pouted dejectedly and rose from his chair with all the martyred countenance of
a whipped dog. Belgium bit her lips to stop her smile; he went to stand face to
the opposite counter, gathering the tools he needed at the approximate speed of
a funeral march.
“Well -
maybe later,” she amended.
She knew
from the set of his shoulders that he was smiling, but he didn’t reply.
For a moment
they worked in silence: France working the knife with the practiced ease of one
who had spent centuries handling them - its blade gleamed in the light as it
came down on the apple, sending flashes of silver streaking across the walls at
regular intervals -; she stirring the paste that would soon be thick enough
for. It was a soothing pastime, baking, because it was repetitive enough not to
demand much thought, and yet had enough of variations on the original theme
that it never became boring. Slash, slash, went France’s knife as he began
peeling the apples, his gestures regular and assured; and to this rhythm he
soon added music, a hum, low in his throat.
Her hand
faltered, and she turned and saw that he was France was looking at her over his
shoulder, the corners of his lips quirking, and something strummed in response
-- that certainty, that knowledge that something belonged to her that came with
being a nation. Her mixing bowl was quite forgotten; she leant back against the
counter and watched him watch her.
“I have all
his CDs, you know.”
He didn’t
seem surprised. He wouldn’t - after all, he probably did too, she thought with
some fondness.
“In Dutch,
naturally?” he asked, teasing.
“Those that
he translated.”
His gaze
was so intense she felt she could not look away.
“And you
gave some to Lars?”
“Yes.” She scratched
her left eyebrow thoughtfully. “I kept those he had given me, though.”
“He gave
you -“
“He’d seen
me in Brussels, one day. I knew who he was, of course, but I never thought he’d
be able to - he didn’t - “ she blinked away thoughts of her sister, swallowed -
“Well, anyhow, he came to see me before the song came out, offered me a CD. The
Dutch version. He’d recorded it in Dutch, he said, he couldn’t think not to.”
“Of
course.”
France’s
voice was quiet, almost apologetic, as if he had sensed Wallonia’s name in the
offing, and she shook her head at him with a surprised laugh.
“Come on -“
she said, with a gesture of her hand. “‘Mijn
Vlakke Land’?”
“Ik speek geen Vlaamse!” he answered,
lifting his hands in the air as if surrendering, and his accent was so thick
she had to giggle, repeating the sentence in proper Flemish.
France
followed her to where the Hi-Fi stood, unobtrusive, in a corner of the kitchen
and watched her fiddle around with the buttons - hands floating over her hips,
of course, it would not be France if he wasn’t so touchy-feely, she thought
with a roll of her eyes.
She pressed
‘play’.
Wanneer
de Noordzee koppig breekt aan hoge duinen…
Music
poured from the speakers, and the feeling was not unlike being struck full-face
by a strong gust of wind. It left her stunned and gasping for air, and France
laughing at her - not unkindly, because he was feeling it too; not as strong as
her, of course, but this was him,
too, somewhere.
“Avec des cathédrales comme unique montagnes,”
he said, between a song and a whisper - of course, that was the line he had
chosen, she thought, the pervert!
She whirled
in his arms, catching his left hand in hers -
wanneer de lage lucht er grijs als
leisteen is - he pulled at her hand and she fell against his chest with a
cry and a shout of laughter and they sang together the last few words, tasting
them, weighing them on their tongues; it was as if something was blossoming in
Belgium’s chest, a bubble of joy pressing right above her heart.
“Oh,
France,” she breathed, and he merely nodded, letting his forehead fall on the
crook of her shoulders.
“He spoke
well of you,” he agreed. “Of us. I always think the part about the cathedrals bears
a particular resemblance -“
“Oh,
France,” she repeated, this time more in exasperation than anything. “You know
how to ruin a mood.”
“You are
insensitive to my charms.”
“I’m immune
to them; you’ve used them too often on me.” He gave a little jerk of his shoulders
to signify his regret, and Belgium leant forwards, startled and horrified -
“Don’t do that!”
He repeated
the gesture, surprised, and she yelled and guffawed at the same time -
“France!”
“Quoi?” he
asked, nonplussed at her sudden hilarity.
She stood
face to him, imitated his gesture, and understanding slowly spread over his
features. With a disbelieving “mon Dieu”, he let his face fall into his cupped
hands, and she burst out into peals of laughter.
“It’s not
funny,” he snapped from behind his fingers. “I didn’t know I was doing it, I
should be considered a victim -“
“Of your
boss’s mannerism? Come, France -“ a thought struck her, and she whispered
conspiratorially, “Have you tried embracing Germany yet, like he does - now
that’s something I’d pay to see!”
“Stop, stop, n’en jette plus!” he cried, and hid
his face deeper.
There was
an empty moment as she vaguely tried to pat consolingly at his shoulder, only
to make him flinch as if he were carrying a terrible burden.
“I know you
don’t like him much,” she ventured at last, holding her laughter back with her
teeth, before continuing in what she hoped was a bracing tone, “But come on,
you’re not going to waste a perfectly good afternoon when you’re on holidays away from Paris.”
“Holidays
usually entail sun, in my book,” he sniped, lifting his head to glare at her,
looking in all the world like a sulky child.
His criticism
seemed to act as a lucky charm, because as that moment two clouds parted to
reveal a corner of milky blue sky, and light spilt across their faces as if to
taunt them. Belgium glanced through the window, at the neighbour’s trees bent
by the wind, then up at the sky again, and sure enough; it was blowing the
rainclouds away, slowly but surely.
“That’s
where you’re wrong,” she beamed back at him. “I predict a lovely afternoon.”
He sniffed,
mock-sighed, and she coaxed him with promises of the finished tart, which
would, of course, be lovely, being produced by the both of them; to which he
retorted that he had taught her to
bake anyway, at which point she relented, just to get him to finish peeling the
apples.
“You know,”
he started as they were arranging the fruit pieces on the tart in concentric
circles, “On the subject of bosses -“
“Hmm?”
“Your Prime
Minister,” he said with a wide smile, and Belgium cringed.
“I know, I
know -“ she began hurriedly, but he cut her off.
“And to
think that when my president married his wife, you teased me about it for
weeks. Now, I’ve not read the Bible for a long time, you’re probably more
learned it than me - but wasn’t there a verse about casting the first stone,
and another about seeing the straw in another’s eye but not the - the -“ he
flailed with the term, “la poutre in
ours?”
“Yes, well…
he’s Walloon, not Flemish! And anyway,
that was a purely professional situation.”
France
hummed in disbelief and seemed ready to retort something, and she filled the
silence by shakily readjusting the rows of apples, casting desperately around
for another subject.
“It’s
bizarre, because I distinctly recalled Wallonia saying that -“
“I think we
can go ahead and put the tart in the oven, now,” she said, firmly. “It’s
probably at the right temperature by now.”
France fell
silent, but there was a smile on his lips that told her he would bring the
issue up again, preferably in Netherlands’ hearing, and he would never let her hear the end of it. How hilarious, he would
think! His conservative little sister’s Prime Minister being caught - well. She
opened the oven door with a vengeance, and glared at France as he handed her
the tart.
It was
amazing how easily the mere thought of her brother riled her up, really. And by
that, she thought with rather more violence than necessary, she meant amazingly
annoying. She threw her kitchen
gloves down unto the countertop and stalked to the table, where she plunked
herself down on one of the chairs.
“You could
make the coffee,” she groused at France, and, having probably no wish to
designate himself as a victim of what she called her Netherlands-moods, he
moved to obey, and had soon filled two cup with the steamy black liquid.
“So,” he
announced as he sat down in front of her, and tried to catch her gaze, but she
looked away each time, pouting, so he simply leant back in his chair and
laughed. “Again, I have to point out that it’s the hospital that makes fun of
charity.”
“You don’t
say that in English,” she grumbled, but that comment slid off him easily; he
had never much cared about the correctness of his idioms.
“Yes, yes -
you act like I am unreasonable when I am grumpy when I am, in fact, no worse
than you.”
“You don’t
have Lars as a brother!” she retorted, but felt the corners of her mouth
twitch.
France
frowned, obviously surprised. “Well, I’m very thankful for that, but I don’t
see why…?”
She sighed,
hesitated, feeling, after all, slightly ridiculous, and then decided to
summarize her thoughts in a few words, and he restrained himself to commenting
that her thoughts moved fast.
“You don’t
have him as a brother,” she repeated. He smiled and solemnly swore to her, if
it made her mind easier, that he had no intention of telling Netherlands about
what had transpired with her Prime Minister, “though I don’t see how I could
anyway. I never see him, outside of World Meetings.”
“Lucky
you,” she mumbled.
“Though
you’d never guess -“ and here he leant forwards above the table - “I met him
just last week! I was at the market at Forcalquier, in Provence - a lovely town
- and the number of his tourists that were there! It was astounding. And I saw
the man himself at a stall, trying to buy tapenade. His accent was simply
awful, so I offered to translate for him, but he brushed me off.”
He frowned,
obviously offended, and Belgium felt torn between amusement and irritation. It
was one of these facts of life that Netherlands and France didn’t like each
other much, despite, or maybe because of, their many resemblances and their
geographical proximity - or rather, Netherlands found making fun of France very
amusing, and France, in turn, found that behavior deeply vexing. Flanders and
Wallonia both had given up on them; it was one of the only things they could
agree on anymore.
France took
a sip of his coffee and shook his head as if trying to express all the wrong in
the world. - “Tourists,” he concluded.
“Consider
yourself lucky to have any at all!”
He stared
at her as if she had suggested England’s eyebrows should set a trend, then
stopped, frowned, and relented with nothing but an unintelligible grumble.
“I’d like
to have a little more of them sometimes,” she confided almost sheepishly.
“Well - what
about Brussels?”
“Oh, excuse
me; I’d like a little more tourists for something else than the European
Capital.”
There was a
pause, France obviously trying to think of something to retort to this. She
felt touched that he cared enough about her to try to spare her feelings - but
on the other hand, she was also a little disappointed, because France mocking
her would have meant he thought her fears unfounded.
At last, he
gave a helpless shrug, blowing on his drink.
“Well, I
hear I’ve won you a few with my film.”
“Your
film,” she repeated, raising an eyebrow.
“Yes, you know -
Bienvenue chez les Ch’tis.” And, probably taking her silence for incomprehension, which it was, in a
way, he added - “You saw it?”
“Well, I
did. I could hardly have escaped it - Wallonia dragged me to the cinema with Luxembourg.”
France
didn’t even attempt to be subtle about his preening, and Belgium giggled. She
had been glad of the film’s success - it brought to light a region that was, in
many ways, similar to her own - but as often when it concerned himself, France
had gone overboard. A success equal to that of Titanic in the Hexagon! Really.
“I still
don’t see what it has to do with me,” she added.
“Well,
people started to want to visit the Nord,
and then it’s very close to Belgium, or to Flanders, more precisely. The Low
Countries.”
Belgium
gave a slow nod - she couldn’t help feeling doubtful despite France’s
self-assured explanation. Even if he had ‘won
her a few tourists’, as he said, it was probably in numbers so low as to be
unnoticeable.
They
chattered on a little, switching from the European Union and the latest trends
in Paris and Brussels and their respective merits, to the forest fires in
Russia and the generally autumnal summer they had had so far, and Belgium took
advantage of the situation to remark that the sky had cleared up remarkably in
the last hours, that the sun was now shining, and the temperatures were -
miraculously! - flirting with the 25 degrees Celcius.
The tart
was gotten out of the oven, tasted pronounced ‘delicious’ by France - “no doubt thanks to the wonderfully clean cut
of the apples,” he added with a smile - and they decided of a common accord
to eat on the outdoors table, which of course had to be uncovered first.
Belgium
stayed behind to cut the tart into even pieces, and, as she was straightening,
looked out of the window. She smiled at the sight of France shaking out the
table’s covers, spewing droplets of rainwater unto the already humid grass. His
shirt was untucked, sleeves rolled back, and Netherland’s old sandals really
were hideous (France had, sniffing, referred to them as ‘tourist outerwear’)
but he seemed almost more approachable that way than in his perfectly-tailored
suits and shiny Italian shoes - and it warmed her heart to know she was one of
the only people he’d ever consent to show himself to in such a state.
“Frankrijk,” she called out fondly as he
turned towards the window, and he smiled at her and disappeared from her view
in a swish of golden hair.
Her last
thought before he took her in his arms and kissed her was that he really did
look handsome like that, face tilted in the afternoon light -- whatever his
clothes.
--
Whew! Okay, that was longer than I meant it to, and
maybe it wasn’t… exactly what you intended with your prompt, but I hope you
like it!
NOTES (because
I couldn’t resist adding tons of details)
~ Belgium is divided into two (well, in three if you
count the German-speaking province, but it’s really a minority):
Flanders,
to the north-west, and
Wallonia,
to the south-east. Flanders is mainly Dutch-speaking, Wallonia mostly
French-speaking, and Brussels is both, hence the heated debates over whether
Brussels would be Flemish or Walloon in the event of a split between the two. Geographically, the two are also very
different. Flanders, like the Netherlands and northern France, is very flat
(the jokes Hetalia-wise are endless ;D) and consists mostly of open fields,
polders, canals, etc. Wallonia is much more hilly and wooded.
~ The situation between Flanders and Wallonia, as you
might have surmised, is complicated. Walloon people used to be much more
numerous, powerful, and also much richer, than Flemish people (all the
important jobs went to Walloon people, etc.) Now the tide has been reversed:
Flemish people have the numeric superiority and also most of the industry and
trade, Wallonia being a mostly agricultural region, and it’s the turn of the
Walloon to be discriminated. If you go to a bar in Flanders and order something
in French, you won’t be served; in many workplaces, they’re forced to speak
Dutch even though normally the two languages should be used. Also, a majority
of people in Flanders is pro-independence, while the overwhelming majority of people
in Wallonia want Belgium to stay united.
~ I chose to have Belgium from Hetalia represent
Flanders. Headcanon is: Flanders and Wallonia are twin sisters, with Wallonia
being a sort of distant cousin to France and Flanders being Netherlands’
sister, as per canon. I imagine the relationship between Flanders and Wallonia
to be very strained, and that Flanders and Netherlands wouldn’t get along that
well either, being that Netherlands is much more socially liberal than
Flanders. Still, it’s a love/hate sort of thing ^^
~
Jacques Brel
is a Belgian singer of Flemish origin, although he mainly spoke French (it
being at the time the de facto language of Belgium) and all of his songs were
written in French (he translated some of them into Dutch, like
Le
Plat Pays/
Mijn Vlakke Land - ‘The
Flat Country’ - which is is basically a description of Flanders. The original
text in French is simply beautiful, though I can’t judge for the Dutch version!)
~
Forcalquier
really exists. Its market does too (I was there on holidays). And the number of
Dutch tourists there was simply astounding: the only other nationalities I made
out, apart from French, were German and American. Also, Forcalquier is a very
beautiful village, like many in Provence, but what makes it out of the common
is its rather awesome history, involving - if I remember correctly - refusing
to surrender during WWII; I imagine France would have quite an attachment to
the place.
~
Bienvenue
chez les Ch’tis is a really cool film. Rather
overrated, Belgium’s right about that, but it’s still cool, although I image it
must be hard to understand and appreciate for non-native Francophones. Which is
probably why an American version is in the works.