He only wants us for our infantry... [1/3?]
anonymous
August 30 2010, 16:46:13 UTC
History notes coming at the end of the fill.
“How many Coalitions is it now?” asked Prussia, lying on his back-- in his boots-- on England's bed. England's eyebrows twitched.
“Six,” he said, glaring stonily.
“Holy shit, man, that's a lot of Coalitions.” England breathed in and out, slowly, and found himself wondering if he really needed the other nation's help. Torgau, said .part of his mind. Jena. Auerstedt, said the other. He inhaled and exhaled again. Either way, said the most pragmatic part of his personality, he needed all the help he could get. Even if that help came in the form of-- “Seriously, what have you been doing all this time? Hasn't it been like, a decade?”
“Two,” said Russia, smiling sweetly.
England glared at the two of them. “You,” he said, gesturing at Prussia, “have fought for nineteen days in the last fifteen years. And you,” he said, turning to Russia. “Don't even get me started on you. If you had have joined us back in '93, we wouldn't even be in this situation.”
Russia's smile didn't waver. “Oh? I didn't realize you were wanting so badly for the imperial troupes of Mother Russia.”
England and Prussia shuddered in tandem. “Don't do that, man,” said Prussia. “It's creepy.”
Russia looked confused. “What have I done?”
“You... don't call yourself that, ok?”
“Call myself...?”
“Mother Russia.”
“I don't think I called myself Mother Russia.”
England had his face in his hands. “You did,” he said, muffled.
“Oh,” said Russia, unrepentant.
“Anyway,” said England. “Don't you two dare intimate that I haven't been making every effort. Do you have any idea how much this war has cost me?”
“Oh yeah,” said Prussia. “We know, you haven't gotten laid since '88.” England spluttered.
“Oh?” said Russia, looking genuinely confused. “What about Amiens?”
England slammed his fist down. “I have been at war nonstop since 1792--”
“Amie--”
“Enough about Amiens! What were you two doing? Staying home and picking your noses!”
“I think he's getting mad,” said Russia.
“Yeah, calm down, man.”
And in the end, what else could he do? He buried his face in his hands. “I hate you both.”
Prussia grinned at Russia. “Come on now, old man. We know you want us.”
“I want your support If there were anyone else...”
“It's cool,” he said, putting his hands behind his head. “I don't mind being a replacement.” Russia nodded, placidly. “So, are we going to fuck or what?”
Re: He only wants us for our infantry... [1/3?]
anonymous
August 30 2010, 17:04:45 UTC
Pffffffffffft. I was not expecting quirky humor when I clicked on this, anon; in fact, I wasn't expecting to laugh at all, much less sporfle my way through this, and that's kind of a welcome surprise. <3 And damn, why did I never think of this threesome? :D
I have to agree with first anon, the quirky humour was a welcome surprise! Poor England, so exasperated, Prussia such a pain and Russia so... Russia XD Awesome stuff!
Re: He only wants us for our infantry... [1/3?]
anonymous
August 30 2010, 21:20:24 UTC
Russia's gonna ruin/creep them out during sex da? Hehe that make it better and more lolz for us XDDD oh Russia...and Englands so repressed Prussia will show him how to stop!
Re: He only wants us for our infantry... [1/3?]
anonymous
August 30 2010, 22:39:03 UTC
Russia talking dirty ~~ ♥ and calling himself Mother Russia, oh yes
Prussia is fucking amusing, manXD. I also like Imperial!England, not enough of that around. And was that a reference to FrUK? What happened at Amiens? Did they seriously get it on in the middle of the Napoleonic Wars, oh god, that is so hot Their interaction is fantastic. I hope it doesn't stop during the sex xDDDDD
“How many Coalitions is it now?” asked Prussia, lying on his back-- in his boots-- on England's bed. England's eyebrows twitched.
“Six,” he said, glaring stonily.
“Holy shit, man, that's a lot of Coalitions.” England breathed in and out, slowly, and found himself wondering if he really needed the other nation's help. Torgau, said .part of his mind. Jena. Auerstedt, said the other. He inhaled and exhaled again. Either way, said the most pragmatic part of his personality, he needed all the help he could get. Even if that help came in the form of-- “Seriously, what have you been doing all this time? Hasn't it been like, a decade?”
“Two,” said Russia, smiling sweetly.
England glared at the two of them. “You,” he said, gesturing at Prussia, “have fought for nineteen days in the last fifteen years. And you,” he said, turning to Russia. “Don't even get me started on you. If you had have joined us back in '93, we wouldn't even be in this situation.”
Russia's smile didn't waver. “Oh? I didn't realize you were wanting so badly for the imperial troupes of Mother Russia.”
England and Prussia shuddered in tandem. “Don't do that, man,” said Prussia. “It's creepy.”
Russia looked confused. “What have I done?”
“You... don't call yourself that, ok?”
“Call myself...?”
“Mother Russia.”
“I don't think I called myself Mother Russia.”
England had his face in his hands. “You did,” he said, muffled.
“Oh,” said Russia, unrepentant.
“Anyway,” said England. “Don't you two dare intimate that I haven't been making every effort. Do you have any idea how much this war has cost me?”
“Oh yeah,” said Prussia. “We know, you haven't gotten laid since '88.” England spluttered.
“Oh?” said Russia, looking genuinely confused. “What about Amiens?”
England slammed his fist down. “I have been at war nonstop since 1792--”
“Amie--”
“Enough about Amiens! What were you two doing? Staying home and picking your noses!”
“I think he's getting mad,” said Russia.
“Yeah, calm down, man.”
And in the end, what else could he do? He buried his face in his hands. “I hate you both.”
Prussia grinned at Russia. “Come on now, old man. We know you want us.”
“I want your support If there were anyone else...”
“It's cool,” he said, putting his hands behind his head. “I don't mind being a replacement.” Russia nodded, placidly. “So, are we going to fuck or what?”
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Mother Russia jokes are never not funny. XD
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oh Russia...and Englands so repressed Prussia will show him how to stop!
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and calling himself Mother Russia, oh yes
Prussia is fucking amusing, manXD. I also like Imperial!England, not enough of that around. And was that a reference to FrUK? What happened at Amiens? Did they seriously get it on in the middle of the Napoleonic Wars, oh god, that is so hot
Their interaction is fantastic. I hope it doesn't stop during the sex xDDDDD
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