Disorder and Discord (4/4)
anonymous
March 29 2009, 07:00:49 UTC
The sound of retching fills the bar’s restroom.
Alfred is purging in the toilet.
Arthur rests the back of his head against the door and closes his eyes, emotion surging under his skin and deep in his chest. He listens until the sound is gone, and then gives his friend a minute before opening the door to peer inside. Alfred jerks his head up from the sink where he is washing his hands.
“Ready to go?” he asks, forcing himself to smile and look him in the eye. He’s a liar. He’s staring at a liar, but he’s the one living the lie because he knows. He’s known about this for years and he doesn’t know what to do. Arthur’s a liar, and Alfred’s a liar, and Raivis has been lying to them all along about something that they’ll probably never find out.
As they walk out together into the night, Arthur thinks that Ivan is probably the only honest one between them. Suddenly his eyebrows don’t seem like such a big problem any more.
-
Kiku Honda watches Alfred, Arthur, Ivan and Latvia walking back in the dark outside, three storeys below and somehow even further away. They look as though they’re having fun.
Kiku likes Arthur- he’s friendly and amiable in a sarcastic kind of way. Latvia smiles at him in their Advanced Physics classes; Kiku should really apologise to Ivan for that fight that they had at the end of last year, but he never has. Alfred’s always the life of every party, they say.
Not that Kiku would know, of course. He never goes.
He’s always asked. Taiwan flirts with him when they sit next to each other in class. He has plenty of friends- people he talks to in class about tests and so on. He visits Feliciano and Ludwig’s dorm sometimes and they have fun, talking and laughing and drinking a quiet German beer or two.
But he can’t. He can’t leave his room, he can’t go and talk with people and god-forbid should he ever go into a bar, because they’d be real people there, strangers…
It hurts him when he has to turn down Feliciano’s offer to celebrate his birthday at a nearby club. When Alfred rings him up and tells him that Ivan-knows-a-cool-new-bar-want-to-come? he wants nothing more than to be able to just say yes.
But he knows that it’s just pity. They don’t really like him. And even if they do, Kiku’ll do something strange and he’ll embarrass himself and they’ll all laugh. He’ll have to do something that isn’t part of the everyday, isn’t on his script. He’ll have to improvise in front of all of his perfect, happy, social friends, and he’ll fail. And that terrifies him more than anything.
As he listens to Alfred’s voice outside in the corridor, Kiku curls up in his bed and wishes that he were normal.
- Sorry- anon is not really familiar with human names. Hope they were all correct...^^;
I suppose this is all up to interpretation but just in case you want a list:
Re: Disorder and Discord (4/4)
anonymous
March 29 2009, 08:46:19 UTC
Oh. Oh my.
T_T
My heart broke anew with every character I read. Why, oh why, did these characterisations fit so well? The ones I loved most were Canada's, South Italy's and Japan's because they were just too devastaingly true. And the bit about Arthur thinking that Ivan may be the most honest of the all? That line was the one that moved me he most.
Re: Disorder and Discord (4/4)
anonymous
March 31 2009, 01:58:52 UTC
I enjoyed this probably more than I should have. The Germany and Italy part was adorable and the bar scene was interesting (I liked the bar scene but I can't seem to describe how or why I liked it). I was surprised with Greece being a hypersomniac though it defiantly seems to fit him. (I have hypersomnia too but I have medication.) Anyway good job author!anon
Alfred is purging in the toilet.
Arthur rests the back of his head against the door and closes his eyes, emotion surging under his skin and deep in his chest. He listens until the sound is gone, and then gives his friend a minute before opening the door to peer inside. Alfred jerks his head up from the sink where he is washing his hands.
“Ready to go?” he asks, forcing himself to smile and look him in the eye. He’s a liar. He’s staring at a liar, but he’s the one living the lie because he knows. He’s known about this for years and he doesn’t know what to do. Arthur’s a liar, and Alfred’s a liar, and Raivis has been lying to them all along about something that they’ll probably never find out.
As they walk out together into the night, Arthur thinks that Ivan is probably the only honest one between them. Suddenly his eyebrows don’t seem like such a big problem any more.
-
Kiku Honda watches Alfred, Arthur, Ivan and Latvia walking back in the dark outside, three storeys below and somehow even further away. They look as though they’re having fun.
Kiku likes Arthur- he’s friendly and amiable in a sarcastic kind of way. Latvia smiles at him in their Advanced Physics classes; Kiku should really apologise to Ivan for that fight that they had at the end of last year, but he never has. Alfred’s always the life of every party, they say.
Not that Kiku would know, of course. He never goes.
He’s always asked. Taiwan flirts with him when they sit next to each other in class. He has plenty of friends- people he talks to in class about tests and so on. He visits Feliciano and Ludwig’s dorm sometimes and they have fun, talking and laughing and drinking a quiet German beer or two.
But he can’t. He can’t leave his room, he can’t go and talk with people and god-forbid should he ever go into a bar, because they’d be real people there, strangers…
It hurts him when he has to turn down Feliciano’s offer to celebrate his birthday at a nearby club. When Alfred rings him up and tells him that Ivan-knows-a-cool-new-bar-want-to-come? he wants nothing more than to be able to just say yes.
But he knows that it’s just pity. They don’t really like him. And even if they do, Kiku’ll do something strange and he’ll embarrass himself and they’ll all laugh. He’ll have to do something that isn’t part of the everyday, isn’t on his script. He’ll have to improvise in front of all of his perfect, happy, social friends, and he’ll fail. And that terrifies him more than anything.
As he listens to Alfred’s voice outside in the corridor, Kiku curls up in his bed and wishes that he were normal.
-
Sorry- anon is not really familiar with human names. Hope they were all correct...^^;
I suppose this is all up to interpretation but just in case you want a list:
Germany- Obssesive Compulsive Personailty Disorder
Italy- Infatuation
France- ...attention seeking?
Canada- Occasional Weed/ Inferiority
South Italy- Comfort eating/jealousy
Greece- Hypersomnia
England- Body Dysmorphic disorder (eyebrows ^^;)
Russia- …being Russia?
Latvia- Alcoholism
China- Pressure/perfectionism
Korea- Internet Addiction
America- Bulimia
Japan- Social Phobia
List is far from concrete, but then again, neither are the people they describe. :) Take of this what you will, anons!
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My heart breaks for all of them. But so much for Raivis. And Kiku. And Matthew. Oh God, Matthew. :(
Glorious job, anon!
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was a little paranoid that the representations would be OOC, as I haven't written Matthew or Francis or Arthur or even really Raivis properly before.
neway- thanks a heap!
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Which, by the way, was EXCELLENT.
Kudos again, anon! (yay bulimic!Alfred returns <3) Japan's social phobia is a great (and historically reminiscent) touch.
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matthew made me cringe a bit. and GOD. al. sdfhsuef and lativia.
u_____u ♥ ilu anonwriter!
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T_T
My heart broke anew with every character I read. Why, oh why, did these characterisations fit so well? The ones I loved most were Canada's, South Italy's and Japan's because they were just too devastaingly true. And the bit about Arthur thinking that Ivan may be the most honest of the all? That line was the one that moved me he most.
Well done anon, well done.
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This fic was so good!
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