God's mistake [5/?]
anonymous
March 21 2009, 21:44:58 UTC
Ivan has lost track of the months.
He has started to shove the food down the throath with more greed than a hungered man could ever manage. He has starten to skip so many baths that the nurses have started to force him into the tub. What's more important, he has skipped so many conversations, he hardly remembers how to speak anymore.
Ivan is allowed a visit every week now, since he never makes trouble anymore. He sleeps most of the time. But no one comes to visit. Every Sunday he would sit in the waiting room in which friends and families could come find their hospitalized aquaintances. And every Sunday he would leave alone, go to bed and not get up the next morning.
It is one of those Sundays. Ivan is seated by the window. He's allowed to go out, too, but he can't. It seems he's lost all his will to live. For a month ago, he attempted suicide, but they stopped him. And it makes him angry to just think about it. "Why can't you just let me do this one thing I really want?!" he had cried, before passing out from using too much air. Since that day, he hadn't spoken again. It's his punishment to them.
People are coming and leaving. Even his neighbour, Timmy the psychopath, is getting visiters. But not he. Ivan lowers the gaze to the floor. He's not dissappointed. He just feels like waste, taking space for no reason. He's to no use.
"I'm looking for a Braginski. Ivan Braginski." Oh, those words, he would love to hear them. "He's here? Where?" To hear someone say that, even Alfred, it would make his day. That's what he thinks. "That guy? Thank you very much." That's what Toris would say. Always so polite, always so nice, always wearing blue sneakers.
The sneakers in front of Ivan's eyes are blue. He glares at them in misbelief. Funny, he thinks, I was just thinking about those.
"Ivan?" He turns his gaze upwards. They meet with deep green, coloured with a smile. "Ivan, hey, it's so good to see you again." It's Toris. Ivan think he's dreaming, and as Toris place his hands at his shoulder, he's sure he's dying, 'cause the world around him turns black.
He has started to shove the food down the throath with more greed than a hungered man could ever manage. He has starten to skip so many baths that the nurses have started to force him into the tub. What's more important, he has skipped so many conversations, he hardly remembers how to speak anymore.
Ivan is allowed a visit every week now, since he never makes trouble anymore. He sleeps most of the time. But no one comes to visit. Every Sunday he would sit in the waiting room in which friends and families could come find their hospitalized aquaintances. And every Sunday he would leave alone, go to bed and not get up the next morning.
It is one of those Sundays. Ivan is seated by the window. He's allowed to go out, too, but he can't. It seems he's lost all his will to live. For a month ago, he attempted suicide, but they stopped him. And it makes him angry to just think about it. "Why can't you just let me do this one thing I really want?!" he had cried, before passing out from using too much air. Since that day, he hadn't spoken again. It's his punishment to them.
People are coming and leaving. Even his neighbour, Timmy the psychopath, is getting visiters. But not he. Ivan lowers the gaze to the floor. He's not dissappointed. He just feels like waste, taking space for no reason. He's to no use.
"I'm looking for a Braginski. Ivan Braginski." Oh, those words, he would love to hear them. "He's here? Where?" To hear someone say that, even Alfred, it would make his day. That's what he thinks. "That guy? Thank you very much." That's what Toris would say. Always so polite, always so nice, always wearing blue sneakers.
The sneakers in front of Ivan's eyes are blue. He glares at them in misbelief. Funny, he thinks, I was just thinking about those.
"Ivan?" He turns his gaze upwards. They meet with deep green, coloured with a smile. "Ivan, hey, it's so good to see you again." It's Toris. Ivan think he's dreaming, and as Toris place his hands at his shoulder, he's sure he's dying, 'cause the world around him turns black.
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Keep up the amazing work, this is heartwretching and wonderful all at once!
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