Just a little piece of angst that I wrote cause I recently had a fail!day.
There was a weight in his chest. Kind of like when the Soviet Union fell. Not exactly though. Matthew turned and looked at him. His expression was mixed. But America wrapped an arm around his neck and laughed loudly. England and France were there too. His family was with him, and soon they dragged him out of the building.
Ivan, I’m sorry but we just can’t do this anymore
Usually Matthew leaves with him. Usually they would go and do something in accordance with Matthew’s need. Maybe to eat, maybe a sports game or movie, or maybe the hotel bed. Not today though.
We’ve had a lot of good times
Things like these happen. Ivan knew it. Sometimes people get unhappy and leave. You have to show them that you can make them happy again and they should come back. Ivan thought Matthew was happy. He smiled and laughed a lot. But he left him so clearly Matthew wasn’t happy enough.
That is why he picked the sunflowers, among a few other kinds. They were Ivan’s favorite. Matthew wasn’t the sort for favorite flowers, but they still had a lot of good memories with them. Ivan closed his eyes, pausing from arranging them just so in the vase. The smell was sweet and reminiscent of quiet summer days spent together. Ivan didn’t waste much time thinking about those days. They made the weight in his chest grow. He instead busied himself with fixing the flowers so that they looked perfect. Simply perfect.
People change…
Matthew answered the door quickly, which made Ivan feel good. Smiling, he pushed the bundle of flowers towards him. “I know you said you think we shouldn’t see each other, but I think we should”
“Russia, it is over. Sorry”, the door closed and Matthew had barely even glanced at the flower. Ivan frowned and tried to swallow back the weight on his heart. He had barely even heard his words. Ivan pulled the flower back to his chest and idly played with a petal. He decided to knock again because he really didn’t know what else to do. Matthew didn’t come this time. Ivan left the flowers on his doorstep.
You can find someone else
The phone rang once- twice- thrice and then went dead. Ivan frowned and dialed again. It took four rings for the phone to go dead that time. Ivan dialed again. It went straight to voicemail that time.
“This is Matthew Williams. Sorry I couldn’t make it to the phone, but I will get back to you as soon as I can
Ivan dialed again. He knew that Matthew wouldn’t pick up, but he could remember the times he did that way.
This is better for both of us
Ivan laid in the snow. He waited for Matthew’s footsteps. The snow would crunch down and it would get louder and louder until Matthew was right next to him. He would block out part of the sun, making his face impossible to see. But Ivan would know that it was Matthew. It always was.
But no one came that day. It didn’t matter how long Ivan waited, Matthew never came. He would never come again.
I’m sorry Ivan but I just don’t love you anymore
Ivan barely recognized the wetness that slid down his cheek.
Re: [Part 7] RusCan "For the Better" (1/1)
anonymous
October 25 2011, 14:55:42 UTC
;___;
(And I really liked the little bits of the breakup conversation you put in italics. It keeps it going in my head, the same way it does for Ivan, and that last italic line... D: *snugs them both*)
Just a little piece of angst that I wrote cause I recently had a fail!day.
There was a weight in his chest. Kind of like when the Soviet Union fell. Not exactly though. Matthew turned and looked at him. His expression was mixed. But America wrapped an arm around his neck and laughed loudly. England and France were there too. His family was with him, and soon they dragged him out of the building.
Ivan, I’m sorry but we just can’t do this anymore
Usually Matthew leaves with him. Usually they would go and do something in accordance with Matthew’s need. Maybe to eat, maybe a sports game or movie, or maybe the hotel bed. Not today though.
We’ve had a lot of good times
Things like these happen. Ivan knew it. Sometimes people get unhappy and leave. You have to show them that you can make them happy again and they should come back. Ivan thought Matthew was happy. He smiled and laughed a lot. But he left him so clearly Matthew wasn’t happy enough.
That is why he picked the sunflowers, among a few other kinds. They were Ivan’s favorite. Matthew wasn’t the sort for favorite flowers, but they still had a lot of good memories with them. Ivan closed his eyes, pausing from arranging them just so in the vase. The smell was sweet and reminiscent of quiet summer days spent together. Ivan didn’t waste much time thinking about those days. They made the weight in his chest grow. He instead busied himself with fixing the flowers so that they looked perfect. Simply perfect.
People change…
Matthew answered the door quickly, which made Ivan feel good. Smiling, he pushed the bundle of flowers towards him. “I know you said you think we shouldn’t see each other, but I think we should”
“Russia, it is over. Sorry”, the door closed and Matthew had barely even glanced at the flower. Ivan frowned and tried to swallow back the weight on his heart. He had barely even heard his words. Ivan pulled the flower back to his chest and idly played with a petal. He decided to knock again because he really didn’t know what else to do. Matthew didn’t come this time. Ivan left the flowers on his doorstep.
You can find someone else
The phone rang once- twice- thrice and then went dead. Ivan frowned and dialed again. It took four rings for the phone to go dead that time. Ivan dialed again. It went straight to voicemail that time.
“This is Matthew Williams. Sorry I couldn’t make it to the phone, but I will get back to you as soon as I can
Ivan dialed again. He knew that Matthew wouldn’t pick up, but he could remember the times he did that way.
This is better for both of us
Ivan laid in the snow. He waited for Matthew’s footsteps. The snow would crunch down and it would get louder and louder until Matthew was right next to him. He would block out part of the sun, making his face impossible to see. But Ivan would know that it was Matthew. It always was.
But no one came that day. It didn’t matter how long Ivan waited, Matthew never came. He would never come again.
I’m sorry Ivan but I just don’t love you anymore
Ivan barely recognized the wetness that slid down his cheek.
“But I still love you, Matvey…”
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(And I really liked the little bits of the breakup conversation you put in italics. It keeps it going in my head, the same way it does for Ivan, and that last italic line... D: *snugs them both*)
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