Re: Act Natural [1d/?]
anonymous
September 14 2010, 02:32:12 UTC
Forgive the letter fail, the above part should be [1c/?]
He'd gotten seven pages written by the time Alfred was finished, but he was so absorbed in his work that he didn't notice when the repairman began packing up all his tools, cleaning up any stray bit of glass that he missed and generally preparing to leave. Arthur barely even registered the looming shadow of someone standing just behind him, and definitely forgot that what he was writing on his screen was potentially fatally embarrassing.
“Turgid cock, huh?” Alfred said into the silence.
Arthur was startled badly, fingers spasming so that the last half of his sentence ended in dsf;io;knf. He glanced up at Alfred, saw that he was reading what Arthur had written and hastily tried to cover up the screen, as if the damage hadn't already been done. Thank god Arthur hadn't used the man's actual name, or it could have been - what was he talking about!? The hot repairman had discovered that Arthur was writing porn. If he got out of this with any sort of dignity intact it would be a god damned miracle.
“I like that; sometimes authors find really good synonyms for dicks, you know,” Alfred continued, cocking his hip to one side and looking up, thinking. “I mean, a lot of times you get really weird ones, like quivering member, or oh! Oh! The one I hate the most is when they call it 'meat,' like I really want to associate someone's cock with a delicious steak, or something. I don't know, it just seems awkward to me. I mean, there's plenty of other things to call a penis, right? Haha, but I'm no writer.”
Arthur's brain, which had recently returned from its vacation to gape at Alfred right alongside Arthur, promptly imploded.
The man walked over to Arthur's bookshelf, and all the Englishman could do was silently plea that he leave the porn section alone, ignore it, ignore it! But as luck would have it, it was the first section Alfred went to. He pulled a couple titles out and hummed with something akin to, well. Arthur's brain was still recovering, but it sounded, ridiculous at is the idea may be, like a healthy amount of interest.
“So I guess you wrote some of these?” Alfred asked, turning to give Arthur a grin. “I wonder if I've read any of yours~” he half sang, waggling his eyebrows.
Arthur's brain began dribbling out his ears.
“I read a lot of stuff from Japan,” Alfred continued easily, thumbing through a couple more titles as he spoke. “My friend buys a bunch of it online, it's called yaoi. I don't really watch the shows they belong to, but some of those Japanese authors have some heavy duty kinks.” Alfred laughed.
Re: Act Natural [1e/?]
anonymous
September 14 2010, 02:35:03 UTC
All Arthur could come up with was, “You read Japanese?” Yeah, that was good. Act like you're interested in the man intellectually and not just magically inspired by the thought of his dick. Just leave the porn out of the conversation entirely.
“Oh yeah,” Alfred said, going to pick up the pile of tools he'd set down near Arthur's desk. “I can read a bunch of different languages. French smut can get pretty intense too; those guys really know how to get dirty, you know. I mean, they did come up with the phrase menage a trois, after all. Which makes me wonder if you could change it up sometimes, call it a menage a sept or something, haha.”
That hadn't worked. That hadn't worked, at all. The logical side of Arthur's brain wibbled and then just shut down altogether in the face of this man's unwavering ability to bring any topic Arthur threw at him right back to porn. Seven people? My god, that sounded fucking hot-!
“Anyway, I'll send you the bill sometime in the next couple days. You can either come buy and pay in person, or send a check to us in the mail, doesn't matter.”
Alfred headed for the door while Arthur was still struggling to digest the abrupt turn from porn to billing, and the fact that the man was well versed in Arthur's genre of choice. Good lord, the man read porn. A lot of porn. Gay porn.
“Well, have a nice day, Mr. Kirkland!” Alfred said, giving Arthur a wink over his shoulder before waving his hand and disappearing from sight.
Arthur heard the heavy steps of his work boots going down the stairs, across the entryway and then heard the slam of the door as the man left. If he strained his ears, he could even hear the start of the truck's engine and the roar of it driving down the street.
After another few moments, Arthur snapped out of it.
“He's gay,” Arthur muttered, glancing around rapidly, mind racing. “The fucking repairman is fucking hot as hell and he's gay!”
T-two fills, two!? Its so amazing I love! Love! Love!
Oh god, Alfred. Alfred, oh jeez, 'I wonder if I read some of these~!'
and Arthurs, 'I need to break something else." Was awesome.
I loved it. And I love you. Seriously! I cant wait for the next update!xDDD You guys make me wanna draw fanart for you all!!! (And thats very hard for me to do that! :DD)
Re: Act Natural [1e/?]
anonymous
September 14 2010, 10:20:33 UTC
*___________*
I have never before giggled whilst nosebleeding, you should be proud! 8D
I'm loving this fill, do continue soon! o3o (I have a vague idea of who you are, author!non, but I best not hazard a guess just now in case I'm wrong x.x)
In any case: Love your prose, their characterization, and hnng Alfred's body is just a magnet for Arthur's gaze, innit? :Q___________
Re: Act Natural [1e/?]
anonymous
September 15 2010, 04:35:27 UTC
Okay
I skipped over this fill because the prompt bored me a little and deleted it from my inbox.
Then someone said something about it on tumblr so I checked it out just out of sheer boredom.
NO LONGER BORED.
I laughed, no seriously laughed by the end. That was hilarious, that was awkward, and if that's just the beginning premise I am so hooked. Just. Alfred. ASKHDAKSHD.
Re: Act Natural [1e/?]
anonymous
September 15 2010, 15:36:10 UTC
Hahaha, oh god, your Arthur is absolutely, fantastically perverted. Dear god, this fic is awesome and steaming hot, and I just realised I don't like England always witty; I can happily take an England sent into lustful incoherency and stupidity too. Alfred's comment about the "turgid cock" was lol, and I find it interesting that you're making him sound intelligent and read and versed in languages, and not obsessed with sexing up Arthur.
For some reason, the idea of Arthur being the one turned on like WHOA, while Alfred is just doing his job and being himselg is what makes this fic that much more awesome to me ^^
And you really made Alfred sound insanely hot, and that last line was wonderful, and is there gonna be a sevensome, please say yes
He'd gotten seven pages written by the time Alfred was finished, but he was so absorbed in his work that he didn't notice when the repairman began packing up all his tools, cleaning up any stray bit of glass that he missed and generally preparing to leave. Arthur barely even registered the looming shadow of someone standing just behind him, and definitely forgot that what he was writing on his screen was potentially fatally embarrassing.
“Turgid cock, huh?” Alfred said into the silence.
Arthur was startled badly, fingers spasming so that the last half of his sentence ended in dsf;io;knf. He glanced up at Alfred, saw that he was reading what Arthur had written and hastily tried to cover up the screen, as if the damage hadn't already been done. Thank god Arthur hadn't used the man's actual name, or it could have been - what was he talking about!? The hot repairman had discovered that Arthur was writing porn. If he got out of this with any sort of dignity intact it would be a god damned miracle.
“I like that; sometimes authors find really good synonyms for dicks, you know,” Alfred continued, cocking his hip to one side and looking up, thinking. “I mean, a lot of times you get really weird ones, like quivering member, or oh! Oh! The one I hate the most is when they call it 'meat,' like I really want to associate someone's cock with a delicious steak, or something. I don't know, it just seems awkward to me. I mean, there's plenty of other things to call a penis, right? Haha, but I'm no writer.”
Arthur's brain, which had recently returned from its vacation to gape at Alfred right alongside Arthur, promptly imploded.
The man walked over to Arthur's bookshelf, and all the Englishman could do was silently plea that he leave the porn section alone, ignore it, ignore it! But as luck would have it, it was the first section Alfred went to. He pulled a couple titles out and hummed with something akin to, well. Arthur's brain was still recovering, but it sounded, ridiculous at is the idea may be, like a healthy amount of interest.
“So I guess you wrote some of these?” Alfred asked, turning to give Arthur a grin. “I wonder if I've read any of yours~” he half sang, waggling his eyebrows.
Arthur's brain began dribbling out his ears.
“I read a lot of stuff from Japan,” Alfred continued easily, thumbing through a couple more titles as he spoke. “My friend buys a bunch of it online, it's called yaoi. I don't really watch the shows they belong to, but some of those Japanese authors have some heavy duty kinks.” Alfred laughed.
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“Oh yeah,” Alfred said, going to pick up the pile of tools he'd set down near Arthur's desk. “I can read a bunch of different languages. French smut can get pretty intense too; those guys really know how to get dirty, you know. I mean, they did come up with the phrase menage a trois, after all. Which makes me wonder if you could change it up sometimes, call it a menage a sept or something, haha.”
That hadn't worked. That hadn't worked, at all. The logical side of Arthur's brain wibbled and then just shut down altogether in the face of this man's unwavering ability to bring any topic Arthur threw at him right back to porn. Seven people? My god, that sounded fucking hot-!
“Anyway, I'll send you the bill sometime in the next couple days. You can either come buy and pay in person, or send a check to us in the mail, doesn't matter.”
Alfred headed for the door while Arthur was still struggling to digest the abrupt turn from porn to billing, and the fact that the man was well versed in Arthur's genre of choice. Good lord, the man read porn. A lot of porn. Gay porn.
“Well, have a nice day, Mr. Kirkland!” Alfred said, giving Arthur a wink over his shoulder before waving his hand and disappearing from sight.
Arthur heard the heavy steps of his work boots going down the stairs, across the entryway and then heard the slam of the door as the man left. If he strained his ears, he could even hear the start of the truck's engine and the roar of it driving down the street.
After another few moments, Arthur snapped out of it.
“He's gay,” Arthur muttered, glancing around rapidly, mind racing. “The fucking repairman is fucking hot as hell and he's gay!”
A pause.
“I need to break something else.”
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And the hip bone poking on low cut jeans? UNF
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Or, if you prefer, let him BANG YOU.
/shot
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ILU SO HARD.
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T-two fills, two!? Its so amazing I love! Love! Love!
Oh god, Alfred. Alfred, oh jeez, 'I wonder if I read some of these~!'
and Arthurs, 'I need to break something else." Was awesome.
I loved it. And I love you. Seriously! I cant wait for the next update!xDDD You guys make me wanna draw fanart for you all!!! (And thats very hard for me to do that! :DD)
*Snickers* Oh Arthur and your sex god~!
*Sighs contently and goes back to reread*
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Oh yes you do Arthur.
This looks amazing -firstauthor!anon- I'm glad some other people are doing this. Still I look forward to more. You're Arthur is so cute.
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I have never before giggled whilst nosebleeding, you should be proud! 8D
I'm loving this fill, do continue soon! o3o (I have a vague idea of who you are, author!non, but I best not hazard a guess just now in case I'm wrong x.x)
In any case: Love your prose, their characterization, and hnng Alfred's body is just a magnet for Arthur's gaze, innit? :Q___________
I'll stop not making sense now. ♥
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I'm intrigued nonetheless. >.>
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OH ALFRED. Menage a sept what? I love your characterization of him! And I can totally see Arthur melting into a puddle for it.
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I love this anon, hot and funny!
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THIS. I
NEED more of this.
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I skipped over this fill because the prompt bored me a little and deleted it from my inbox.
Then someone said something about it on tumblr so I checked it out just out of sheer boredom.
NO LONGER BORED.
I laughed, no seriously laughed by the end. That was hilarious, that was awkward, and if that's just the beginning premise I am so hooked. Just. Alfred. ASKHDAKSHD.
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For some reason, the idea of Arthur being the one turned on like WHOA, while Alfred is just doing his job and being himselg is what makes this fic that much more awesome to me ^^
And you really made Alfred sound insanely hot, and that last line was wonderful, and is there gonna be a sevensome, please say yes
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