Epilogue 1 (3/9)
anonymous
August 11 2010, 04:58:50 UTC
"What CDs?"
"You've got to come and see which!" Arthur exclaimed and practically dragged Alfred with him. A hushed argument started all over again. Feliciano wriggled free of Gilbert's arms and grabbed a tea towel.
"Sorry for ruining the evening," he mumbled and wetted the towel by the sink. Gilbert sat down at the kitchen table and just watched him.
"It's not like the evening was very interesting," he smiled. "It's all the same."
"I guess.." Feliciano dragged the wet towel down across his face and sighed. His eyes hurt as if someone had poured salt into them. He shook his head and dried them off again.
"You're really spending too much time thinking about my brother."
"As if I didn't know that." His voice was bitter. Gilbert looked down.
"Sorry."
"No, I am sorry. Really, sorry." Feliciano put the towel down into the sink and turned around. He ran his fingers through his hair, then sighed deeply and looked down. Gilbert clucked his tongue and got up. "I'll get you a beer, how about that? At the local pub?"
"Do they have to come along?" Feliciano asked and gestured towards the living room. Gilbert chuckled and shook his head.
"No, I'll tell them we're leaving. Just wait here." Feliciano nodded and watched as Gilbert disappeared into the other room. Then he closed his eyes and ran his fingers down his moist cheeks.
He felt bad for treating Alfred and Arthur so unkindly, since they just tried to make him feel better. But he felt hopeless. Out of reach. He wanted to smile and jump around and let the world know that it was going to be okay, but he wasn't sure it was.
Arthur came out into the kitchen. He was holding his jacket. Feliciano took it with a little nod. "Thanks. Sorry for leaving so-"
"Don't worry about it," Arthur interrupted him and helped him put on the jacket. He zipped it and kissed his forehead all motherly. "Is everything okay at Gilbert's?"
"Yeah, he's looking after me."
"Good."
"Yeah.." They looked at each other a bit awkwardly. Then Feliciano swung his arms around Arthur and gave him a short hug. "I promise I'll drop by when I feel better. Just now.." He sighed. Arthur ran his fingers through his hair and nodded.
"I understand. Or, I know you think I don't, but I do. It's alright." Feliciano hugged him again and kissed his cheek, then went out into the hall. Gilbert was waiting for him. He reached out and swung his scarf around Feliciano's neck.
"Thanks for dinner, see you soon," he waved at Arthur before grabbed Feliciano's hand and pulling him down the stairs. Feliciano just followed, looking at those fingers closed around his own. He wondered why he felt so safe just letting Gilbert take care of everything. From where do you get the courage to trust a human being so much? He wrapped both his arms around Gilbert's and pressed himself close to him as they got outside into the cool evening air. Gilbert looked at him.
"Are you feeling bad?" Feliciano shook his head.
"I just want to walk like this," he whispered. Gilbert hesitated, but then he merely turned around and started to guide the way down to the pub. Feliciano took in a deep breath and tasted rain. Like this it wasn't so bad. He opened his eyes and looked up at the other. Gilbert's face was very grave, and he was looking straight out into the air. At that point, Feliciano felt sorry for him, but at the same time there wasn't much he could do.
*
"I will be working at a small office. It's not much I will lean, but I will survive." Gilbert picked up the letter and read it through. As he lowered the paper, he smiled at Feliciano.
"That's good! You're very convincing on a phone." Feliciano nodded eagerly and stretched his arms above his head.
"That's what they said! It'll be good to start something new. Start all over." He picked up one of the magazines from the table. His new job would involve selling subscriptions to a magazine about health and food. It was very simple, but at the same time very exciting, and though he wasn't exactly proud of throwing away his education for something as simple as a company dealing with their customers over the phone, it was better than doing nothing. Gilbert got up and went over to select a bottle of wine from his shelf.
"You've got to come and see which!" Arthur exclaimed and practically dragged Alfred with him. A hushed argument started all over again. Feliciano wriggled free of Gilbert's arms and grabbed a tea towel.
"Sorry for ruining the evening," he mumbled and wetted the towel by the sink. Gilbert sat down at the kitchen table and just watched him.
"It's not like the evening was very interesting," he smiled. "It's all the same."
"I guess.." Feliciano dragged the wet towel down across his face and sighed. His eyes hurt as if someone had poured salt into them. He shook his head and dried them off again.
"You're really spending too much time thinking about my brother."
"As if I didn't know that." His voice was bitter. Gilbert looked down.
"Sorry."
"No, I am sorry. Really, sorry." Feliciano put the towel down into the sink and turned around. He ran his fingers through his hair, then sighed deeply and looked down. Gilbert clucked his tongue and got up. "I'll get you a beer, how about that? At the local pub?"
"Do they have to come along?" Feliciano asked and gestured towards the living room. Gilbert chuckled and shook his head.
"No, I'll tell them we're leaving. Just wait here." Feliciano nodded and watched as Gilbert disappeared into the other room. Then he closed his eyes and ran his fingers down his moist cheeks.
He felt bad for treating Alfred and Arthur so unkindly, since they just tried to make him feel better. But he felt hopeless. Out of reach. He wanted to smile and jump around and let the world know that it was going to be okay, but he wasn't sure it was.
Arthur came out into the kitchen. He was holding his jacket. Feliciano took it with a little nod. "Thanks. Sorry for leaving so-"
"Don't worry about it," Arthur interrupted him and helped him put on the jacket. He zipped it and kissed his forehead all motherly. "Is everything okay at Gilbert's?"
"Yeah, he's looking after me."
"Good."
"Yeah.." They looked at each other a bit awkwardly. Then Feliciano swung his arms around Arthur and gave him a short hug. "I promise I'll drop by when I feel better. Just now.." He sighed. Arthur ran his fingers through his hair and nodded.
"I understand. Or, I know you think I don't, but I do. It's alright." Feliciano hugged him again and kissed his cheek, then went out into the hall. Gilbert was waiting for him. He reached out and swung his scarf around Feliciano's neck.
"Thanks for dinner, see you soon," he waved at Arthur before grabbed Feliciano's hand and pulling him down the stairs. Feliciano just followed, looking at those fingers closed around his own. He wondered why he felt so safe just letting Gilbert take care of everything. From where do you get the courage to trust a human being so much? He wrapped both his arms around Gilbert's and pressed himself close to him as they got outside into the cool evening air. Gilbert looked at him.
"Are you feeling bad?" Feliciano shook his head.
"I just want to walk like this," he whispered. Gilbert hesitated, but then he merely turned around and started to guide the way down to the pub. Feliciano took in a deep breath and tasted rain. Like this it wasn't so bad. He opened his eyes and looked up at the other. Gilbert's face was very grave, and he was looking straight out into the air. At that point, Feliciano felt sorry for him, but at the same time there wasn't much he could do.
*
"I will be working at a small office. It's not much I will lean, but I will survive." Gilbert picked up the letter and read it through. As he lowered the paper, he smiled at Feliciano.
"That's good! You're very convincing on a phone." Feliciano nodded eagerly and stretched his arms above his head.
"That's what they said! It'll be good to start something new. Start all over." He picked up one of the magazines from the table. His new job would involve selling subscriptions to a magazine about health and food. It was very simple, but at the same time very exciting, and though he wasn't exactly proud of throwing away his education for something as simple as a company dealing with their customers over the phone, it was better than doing nothing. Gilbert got up and went over to select a bottle of wine from his shelf.
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