Past-Part Fills Post 1 -- CLOSED
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Any annoyance Francis felt was artfully suppressed by a smile. Why did the tetchy Englishman have to be as deaf to the sounds of the finer things in life as he was tasteless? Waving around a pointy stick for the sake of love was so last century.
“Oh course, Angleterre, and I have braved dangers most foul, mon cher, in order to bring you the tales of my most trying quests for your love,” he cried with a strained smile.
“And your proof?”
This was the moment Francis had been waiting for. With a flourish, he withdrew the rabbit from the sack. “Viola!”
Arthur stared at the bunny hanging by its ears. “…This is a rabbit.”
“Non, non, non, mon cher! This is not an ordinary rabbit! Truly it is more fearsome than any dragon!”
“It looks like a rabbit to me.”
Francis feigned a look of hurt disbelief. “Ah, you wound me, mon cher!” he cried. “Come, let me tell you about how I met this rabbit - it was gnawing of the bones of many fallen knights!”
“Oh wait, wait, I think I’ve heard about that before!” Arthur called for a servant to bring hi a book from the library. The servant hastened away and returned quickly with a thick, leather-bound tome covered in dust.
“If I recall correctly, it was in one of the legends of King Arthur, but I thought that the killer rabbit had been vanquished,” he said, flipping through the yellowed parchment.
“Ah, that is where they are wrong, mon cher.” Francis had no idea what Arthur was talking about but, in his opinion, if Arthur believed him then why shatter that precious illusion. This was all for the worthy cause of getting laid after all. “For rabbits breed like…well, rabbits, Angleterre.”
“Ah, here it is!” Arthur ignored Francis’ suggestive wink and grabbed the book. “Killed one hundred men! Francis, you really killed this thing?!” he turned back with a look of disbelief and admirably veiled approval.
Francis could sense victory close by. If he actually succeeded he swore to buy Gilbert a few drinks. “It was love, mon cher. The power of my love gave me strength.”
“More like the power of your atrocious voice!” Arthur scoffed, although Francis caught the thin blush on his cheeks. He was crumbling! By God, he was crumbling! No one could withstand the great Francis for long!
He gallantly bowed before Arthur, taking his hand to plant a small, chaste kiss upon it. “Come now, Angleterre, will you be so discourteous as to deny me my reward?”
“Well, I suppose you do deserve some congratulations,” Arthur mumbled, withdrawing his hand with a slight blush.
“Some congratulations?!” Francis feigned a look of outrage. “Do you know how many endless days I spent trying to slay this foul beast, and all for your precious approval, mon cher?”
“Well what do you want?” Arthur huffed.
It took the best of Francis‘ efforts to suppress a triumphant smile. “Ah, mon cher, just a kiss from those divine lips would be worth all the gold in the kingdom!” he strummed his lute.
At first it seemed as if he would be denied. However, good manners and honour decreed that a reward should be conferred and therefore, Arthur relinquished. “Very well,” he bid Francis rise and placed a tentative kiss on the man’s forehead.
“And perhaps a night in your chamber!”
“What?!” Arthur jumped, glaring at the man for his audaciousness. However, France dangled the rabbit in front of his face, reminding him just what a ferocious beast it had been. Arthur sighed, turning away from Francis. “Oh, very well.”
And behind Arthur’s back Francis was punching the air in victory. Blood-sucking, evil rabbit? Who ever thought anyone would be stupid enough to fall for that?
XX
In Scotland, near the cave of Caerbannog, gnawing on the bones of fallen knights, its fur stained red with their blood, a small, white rabbit lifted its curious head and sniffed the air. Something in the wind was changing. Perhaps it was time to move south, to England.
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This was great. Oh France, you will be in SO MUCH SHIT when that thing arrives in England.
Great fill, anon, I loved it. :D
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I get the distinct feeling that somewhere Gilbert is laughing hystericly.
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Ah, Francis doing anything for Arthur's love, including lying about killing a rabbit, how romantic...
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XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Don't worry Arthur, Francis will take care of it (and dragging Gilbert along too). ^_~
This was awesome!
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