Final Fantasy IX - Steiner/Beatrix - Forge Anew
Title: Forge Anew
Author/Artist: bofoddity
Fandom: Final Fantasy IX
Pairing: Steiner/Beatrix
Rating: PG
Prompt: FF9 - Beatrix/Steiner - First date, Beatrix must be in a dress, any rating.
Disclaimer: I'm not a native speaker of English, so my phrasing may not be perfect. Also, Final Fantasy IX isn't mine and the story isn't written for profit.
Beatrix couldn't remember the last time she had dressed like this. In one of Queen Brahne's dress balls, most likely, which had often been more challenging than any battle she ever participated in - only the princess had ever appreciated Beatrix's soldier humor - but they had meant nothing to Beatrix, fading to nothing in her mind. So the sight in the mirror was not something she had expected to face willingly, even less with genuine excitement.
She squared her shoulders, wrinkling her nose at the slight frizz in her hair, a protest against the tight braiding. Otherwise she was very pleased with what she saw, sharing a smirk with her reflection.
Yellow wasn't a color that Beatrix favored, cheerful and carefree in a way she didn't wish to be, but its soft, spring light shade flattered her, and it was close enough to white to make her feel comfortable. (To her, colors tended to be mere accessories.) The dress was simple in design, leaving her neck and shoulders bare and embracing her like a glove that had adjusted to her hand over the years, smooth and comfortable on her skin. The skirts flowed easily to her movements, adding to her comfort.
Beatrix felt good, but she had a feeling that her date was feeling exactly the opposite. That's what he thought at least; Beatrix was pleased with herself, but that didn't mean that there wasn't a nervous tingle in her belly, absent confidence in the smile in the mirror.
"How do I look like?" she asked, turning to the young soldier who had stood silent behind her. The soldier straightened her posture, her face shadowed by her helmet, but Beatrix thought she saw traces of confusion, as if the soldier didn't know what to exactly think of her. Which wasn't a surprising thing; the few times the soldiers had seen their general dressed up like this had been subjects for hearty laughter and moments of bonding between battles, her dresses quickly hidden into closets and forgotten. Beatrix suspected that she appeared a little coltish right now as well, like a young girl with her plaited hair and hesitant smile. She hoped that the soldier didn't think her incapable of appreciating an honest opinion.
"You are very beautiful, Madam." The soldier's articulation was careful, but there was an awed hush in her voice, the curve of her mouth shy as she smiled to Beatrix. But the soldier hesitated, considering something very carefully before saying: "But perhaps a sword is a little too much?"
Her fingers had been looping around Save The Queen's handle, which had been leaning against the wall next to the mirror. Her fingers halted now, her brows furrowing. "I'm never without my sword."
"But you're spending an evening with Captain Steiner," the soldier insisted, her obscured face pinkening a little at her own daring. But she didn't back off, adding in a negotiating tone: "If I'm permitted to say, this isn't a battle you are heading to."
Beatrix looked at her hand, which now had full hold on Save The Queen and was ready to lift it. She picked the sword up, turning to the mirror again.
"It isn't," she admitted, raising the blade of the sword. Whatever coltishness was present in Beatrix without sword, there was nothing young about the way she held her weapon, with warrior's steady hands.
It was the warrior that Adelbert Steiner was familiar with, not a woman in fine clothing. She had all intentions to leave Save The Queen behind in the future, but this was only the first night they went out together. She wanted to secure that it wouldn't be the last.
"I only want him to feel comfortable with me." The brown belt and the sheath were as elegant as they could possibly be with a dress, but they felt familiar, so she wore them happily. She sheathed her sword, checking her appearance for final time. She was ready.
"If that's what it takes, Madam." The soldier didn't sound entirely convinced, and Beatrix began to gather a fuller explanation in her mind when she was interrupted: "Captain appears to be waiting for you down there."
Beatrix's eyebrows quirked high, the pounding of her heart fast. Steiner had warned her earlier that he would have a thing or two to take care of before he would arrive to fetch her, and she had fully expected him to take longer.
"How does he look like?" She tried to imagine Steiner standing outside, his face as strict as always, hands clasped behind his back, unless he was holding his sword in front of him, in an unconscious imitation of Beatrix herself.
"It's hard to tell." From the mirror, she saw that soldier had moved over to the window, but leaning away from it instead of forward. She fixed this, only to lean backwards again. "His armor is very shiny."
This time her eyebrows made a leap.
* * *
Steiner's new armor had turned out to be very displeasing.
He no longer had memory of why exactly he had decided to get one. As lovingly as his usual one was mocked, it had served him well and showed no signs of failing him in the future, so he had felt genuine guilt when he had put it away today. However, Beatrix deserved a companion who looked like someone of her worth, and since the Tantalus was in Alexandria, he had turned to them for help.
"You look awesome!" Baku had roared, his voice both the thunder and the lightning that struck all too close to Steiner's ears.
"Dashingly handsome" Blank had confirmed, his encouraging pat clinking rather than creaking on Steiner's armor.
"A true charmer!" Only Cinna had hesitated after his compliment, fiddling his fingers. "But are you sure you don't want any advice about talking to her?"
One long stare for him had been enough to silence them all, and soon they had ushered Steiner out of the theatre. "You bring her here, and we're sure to provide her fantastic entertainment," Baku had promised, and left Steiner alone on the street all too fast.
He was sure that Baku had meant exactly what he had said, and he had desperately convinced himself that it actually boded well for him. The only choice after that had been making his way back to the palace, to stand beneath the window of Beatrix's quarters.
The damn armor hadn't made one single sound during the walk. That only had been enough to unnerve him greatly, his heart beating fast in his chest. That didn't make enough of a sound either.
He could tell that everybody moving around in the courtyard had granted him at least one glance, and they were mostly given out of his sight, denying him all the guesses about their nature. Were they impressed with what they saw? Maybe he was mysterious stranger in their eyes, the first one brave enough to openly woo the glorious Beatrix. Or could they tell immediately that it was Steiner, trying to fit in an armor that was obviously out of his league? Or maybe they were pleased with his improvement, approving that he was finally trying to be the right kind of person to stand by Beatrix's side.
If they were only in Steiner's sight, another of his stares would have stopped their ponderings before they even began. In fact, he probably didn't even need to stare. His frown had sunk too deep into his face, turning into mockery of the expression that had grown and matured as much as Steiner himself had, and he didn't doubt it was a frightening sight. His armor was also reflecting light too easily, causing birds to sway during their flights. He was also pretty sure he had forgotten something, but couldn't tell what. Ill omens kept following each other.
It had been the Tantalus that had convinced him that it would do him no good to think of his evening with Beatrix as a battle to survive. How he wished he had closed his ears.
He was distracted from his moody thoughts when he caught movement from the window, seeing that somebody was looking outside, most likely at him. Steiner couldn't tell if it was Beatrix, but he straightened himself anyway, tilting his chin upwards. Despite his many - endless - discomforts he was determined to make everything memorable for Beatrix, all the way from his own appearance to the night cap he hoped she would enjoy with him in the end of the night. Zidane would be proud of him. If only Zidane knew how much that pride mattered to him.
"Steiner?"
He never had a chance to know what Zidane's pride was like, but he knew what the mocking laughter was like that would have surely rung out now. "Beatrix," he breathed, seeking her with his eyes.
* * *
Steiner's eyes had been firmly fixed on Beatrix's window when she had come outside, his body so unmoving that he had resembled an exceptionally shiny statue. She was honestly surprised to see him stiffen even more when she called out his name.
"Beatrix." He turned his head to her direction carefully, as if he was unsure of what he would face. Her displeasure? She hoped not. But then he absorbed the sight of her, the strain on his face easing away as he stared at her, breathless.
Beatrix herself, however, was struck by how different he looked from second earlier, how tense he had been. Was he really that anxious? She could feel her own calm loosening over this, fear creeping in, and she brushed a shaky hand over her hair.
Then Steiner's mouth curved into an easy smile, and she felt great relief.
"You look stunning." His voice matched his awe-struck face, his smile widening even more, and Beatrix felt her face warm with pleasure. She returned his smile, closing the little distance between them first by walking over to him, then by reaching out to take his hands. He stilled first at the contact, his expression breaking with emotion again - oh, how nervous he was - before he clasped her fingers, sure and tight. Beatrix found that very welcome; another man might have expected that she suddenly required delicate treatment, the soldier in her lost in the folds of her dress.
"You look very fine as well," she said, looking him over once more while his eyes grew excited. He was wearing a finely constructed armor, the smooth steel catching every single ray of light, which made him almost difficult to look at. The armor made her think of fairytale knights, who rode smoothly in and out of trouble and away from the silly noblemen who wailed in their praise, only Steiner carried himself with genuine grace, kind that had been gained in real wars.
Something, however, wasn't there. "You're missing your sword."
Steiner's face quickly crumpled in a frown. "I knew they couldn't resist taking something from me."
"Tantalus?" she inquired, struggling to hide amusement from her face. To think that he had been distracted enough to allow Zidane's friends to slip past his defenses.
"Exactly-" He paused, looking at her in surprise. "How did you know?"
She shrugged. "Who else would have even dared?"
"I should put that daring in line," Steiner muttered, his forehead wrinkling when Beatrix laughed.
"Hopefully you're going to do that later," she said, reaching up to straighten his helmet. There seemed to be some dirt on the otherwise pure white feather that pointed upwards from the helmet, and she rose to her toes for a moment to brush it off. "This is our night, or am I mistaken?"
The wrinkles smoothed out of sight, his smile returning.
"Certainly not," he vowed, stepping backwards from her reach and offering her his arm, and for the first time in her life Beatrix was charmed by this gentleman's gesture. "Shall we?"
"Of course." She hooked his arm around his, and allowed herself to be lead.
* * *
The armor was still far too silent as he and Beatrix made their way to Ruby's theatre, but this time he didn't mind it. Nor did he mind the gazes they drew to themselves, curious and impressed ones, few that were confused. Never had anybody imagined that two former rivals would be walking side by side like this, content with each other's company. Perhaps people would start whispering to each other, wondering how long this had been going on, wondering how long it was going to last.
Steiner managed to put aside all his fears about the last part until they finally made it to the theatre. What he saw there surprised him.
When Steiner had been in the theatre earlier, the only people he had seen were the Tantalus, while he had heard the actors practice somewhere out of sight. But now the theatre was swarming with people, and there seemed to be more on the way. One glance over his shoulder informed Steiner that there were several other couples trailing after him and Beatrix, as well as few lonely people. All of them dressed for a fine evening.
"I had no idea this place was so popular," Beatrix commented from his side as they walked through the entrance, turning to glare at somebody who had tried to shove her to the side. The culprit in question was quick in his apologies, making sure to skip as far away from them as possible.
Steiner hadn't had any idea either. He had known that it was a well-liked theatre, attracting both audience and well-known performers, but when Baku and others had assured him that he could just arrive with Beatrix, so he had assumed that finding good seats wouldn't give him trouble. But when he looked around, he saw tickets in people's hands, and that made him sweat behind his ears.
"There you are!"
He was quite sure that he had never been this happy to hear Cinna's voice. Or to Cinna him as the small man ran towards them, dressed in a light blue suit that looked like it was tailor’s work. Steiner couldn't help but wonder if he had blackmailed somebody to get that outfit done for him, and he couldn't keep a certain comment from slipping out as soon as Cinna stood before him:
"I believe you have my sword stored somewhere."
To Cinna's credit, his wide smile remained on as tightly as a mask.
"Why, we assumed that sharp objects would only get in a way!" But Cinna was quick to turn to Beatrix, bowing to her in a way that didn't seem to be kind to his back, considering the tiny whimper that Steiner's ears caught. "General, you look absolutely magnificent."
"Thank you." Beatrix accepted his compliment with a cool nod, her face unreadable as she looked around. But Steiner knew she was pleased with those words. "The theatre seems to be doing well," Beatrix said, stepping closer to Steiner to give room for people walking past them.
"Yes, our profit has been great!" Cinna held his head high with pride, adjusting his ruffled collar.
"You mean Ruby's profit," Steiner commented, keeping his irritation in line when Cinna pouted at him. He had promised himself a long time ago that he would be nice to Zidane's friends, but sometimes they really tested his willingness to keep that promise. "But yes, there appears to be quite a crowd here. I hope everybody has a seat."
Cinna seemed to be very eager to get credit tonight; he caught Steiner's very vague hint. "No problem! We have reserved a balcony for you!" He whipped around and began to force his way through the crowd, gesturing Steiner and Beatrix to follow. "The balcony, in fact. It's very small." He looked over his shoulder to give Steiner and Beatrix an outrageous wink, pushing somebody out of his way without any consideration or shame. "I believe you two have to cuddle up really close."
His voice was just all too knowing, as if he had looked into Steiner's mind and seen the secret thoughts there. His face flooded with color, while Beatrix had no reaction at all. Steiner knew that she was very entertained behind her casual expression, hopefully in a good way.
"This way," Cinna urged as they reached the stairs leading upstairs, unaware of the strangling hands that Steiner was imagining around his throat. "You'll have complete privacy there." Cinna bounced his way up the stairs, halting to wait at the top of them for Beatrix and Steiner to catch up with them as he dug up a key from his pocket. Compared to the neatly decorated first floor, the second one was darker and dustier, indicating that people didn't have much use for the balcony. Ruby herself, however, seemed to value it, seeing that it was behind a steel door with heavy locks.
"Here we go!" Cinna unlocked the door and pushed it open, stepping aside to allow Steiner and Beatrix to enter. He seemed to be careful to stay outside himself, as if he knew that Steiner felt like tossing him off the balcony. Not that he wouldn't just bounce back to his feet like a cat after the fall. "Enjoy your evening!" And indeed he slipped away like a feline with those words, and Steiner was left alone with Beatrix.
His first reaction to that was to test that the door wasn't locked; it would be a shame if they ended up spending the rest of the evening try to get it open after the play ended. It wasn’t, which allowed Steiner to take a more thorough look at the balcony. Unlike the rest of the floor, the balcony itself was tidy and pleasant, although Cinna had exaggerated its size. There was plenty of room to move around in and the two chairs reserved for the viewer had inches of space between them. Beatrix had already sat down in the other chair, and Steiner walked over to join her.
"I wonder where these have been stolen from," he said as he sat down, perhaps a little pettily. It was entirely possible that Ruby had been able to purchase these chairs herself instead of counting on the Tantalus's help.
Beatrix had taken the theatre program in her hands, reading through the synopsis of the play. "This sounds like a familiar story."
His heart dropped at Beatrix's words. It had taken him long to find a play that might be to her liking, but maybe he should have investigated her tastes further. "Have you seen it before?"
"No, no." The synopsis seemed to be very interesting as Beatrix barely heard his question. "Most stories get repeated anyway. But the ghost stories seem to be very common nowadays."
"Not many of them are comedies." A factor that could have improved many of those plays, in fact.
"A good point." Beatrix put the program down, turning to Steiner with a thoughtful expression. "Maybe this is something that the Queen would enjoy as well?"
Perhaps there had been a joke waiting on his tongue. Perhaps it would have been a funny joke as well, but now he felt it stick to his throat, nodding as he turned his attention to the stage, where the play was about to begin. He smiled briefly in Beatrix's direction as he felt her hand rest down on top of his, but his thoughts were trailing elsewhere.
The ghost in the play was a woman, that much he knew without even looking at the program, but from the moment Beatrix had mentioned the Queen, Steiner had began to think of the ghost as a man. It was the perfect role for Zidane.
* * *
Beatrix spent the first half of the play wanting to hit her forehead against something. Railing of the balcony was conveniently right in front of her, made of strong wood against which her head would surely make a nice sound, but she hadn't completely stopped being a general tonight, she still had her reputation to shield. So all she had left to do was curse her own foolishness, her thoughtless tongue.
Why had she ever thought that mentioning the Queen would be a good idea? She knew that Garnet was still grieving, and she knew Steiner could not ignore that grief, nor the source of it. He still grieved himself. It wasn't the kind of thing one should bring up on a date.
To her fortune, despite the moodiness she sensed from Steiner, she could tell that the comedy was fulfilling its duty. On the stage, the ghost rolled her eyes and sighed in deep frustration as her former and alive fiancé moaned over her unfair death, blinding himself to a friend who could easily be more to him. While following that did draw smile and two from Steiner, the familiar irritation was more welcome sight to Beatrix.
"What a fool," he whispered with contempt, his brows nearly knitting together and turning into one single line as the fiancé broke into yet another set of moans, causing the ghost to hide her face in her hands. Neither noticed how the devoted friend was approached by the fourth important player, a mysterious courter with mustache that usually decorated the faces of villains. "Does he really think that he's honoring his lover that way? Idiot."
Beatrix smiled. "It appears that he will receive what he deserves," she said, watching as the fiancé's friend was suddenly in no hurry to get back to the ungrateful man she had been looking after. "I believe you expected different sort of comedy."
"Seems like it," he admitted. They fell back into silence after that.
As the play proceeded towards its end, Beatrix allowed her eyes to wander away from the stage and over to the audience, catching the sight of Ruby. Maybe it was the weight of her glare that made Ruby react, but the other woman turned her head and glanced up at the balcony, grinning and waving her hand through the air. Everything’s set. She forced more serious look on her face and lowered her hand when she caught people looking at her, and so she missed Beatrix's approving nod. As did Steiner, who was now much happier with the play as the moronic fiancé got what he had earned, snapping to attention when Beatrix rubbed his knuckles with her fingertips.
"There's something I want to show you after the play is over."'
His casual reaction consisted of the tiniest jerk of his eyebrows.
"Not the backstage, I hope."
Beatrix sighed. "So much for it, then…"
One of the downsides of her humor was that people tended to take it too seriously, so she quickly added: "Just come with me. I hope that you will like it."
There was nothing casual about his reaction this time; his eyes widened with surprise.
"How could I not?" he asked, and the sincerity in his voice stunned Beatrix to silence while the audience below broke into applause.
She shrugged the stun away, standing up.
"Come." She took his hand when he stood up as well, and lead him out of the balcony.
Beatrix could hear how people were moving around downstairs, making their leave, and Steiner was about to join them, moving towards the stairs when Beatrix held him back, leading him to other direction instead. Steiner seemed to hesitate a little, but followed her nevertheless. "I wondered if it was the backstage after all…"
"Fool," she laughed as they reached another flight of stairs leading up, taking the fist step. "I considered it, but the air turned out to be too stuffy."
Steiner snorted. "You must have tested it on a good day," he said, taking larger steps to not to lag behind.
"Yes, I believe they agreed with you." She reached the top of the stairs and opened the door, blinking against the slight wind coming from outside.
* * *
His armor finally made a sound when he followed Beatrix to the roof, the smallest creak that nearly made Steiner jump out of his skin. His own armor would have topped that sound with pathetic ease, so the reaction was humiliating. "I've had such a strange day," he began, ready to launch into bigger explanation before he noticed just what Beatrix had prepared for them.
He had been on a picnic only once in his life, and that event had been strictly tied to his duties to the royal family. His job had been to keep Garnet content while her mother had entertained her guests, and while he had completed the task successfully ("Your presence really encourages her to behave well!"), he could have done without memories of unbearable heat, insects that found the little of his skin that was bare too tempting to resist and monsters that lurked around the quests, always lunging for the little princess first.
Now the day had cooled into pleasant night, there was not one insect in sight - most likely due to some trickery - monsters even less. And instead of observing in horror as nobles carelessly tossed food to wild animals, he watched as Beatrix walked over to the white blanket and sat down on it, picking up a bottle of wine. And instead of ensuring that the princess was comfortable and didn't go wandering off, he could sit down himself. With Beatrix.
He made his way to her with tiniest little steps, and almost remained standing.
Beatrix was in process of opening the bottle, but Steiner's fidgety behavior didn't escape her attention, and she looked at him curiously as he finally joined her on the blanket. "You don't need to be nervous around me," she said, her voice empty of judgment.
Out of thoughtfulness to him, he knew. There was no reason for the sudden ridiculous behavior from him, and it frustrated him that there wasn't one. Maybe then he could have been able to fix the problem, whatever it was.
"I know that." He sighed, taking a more comfortable position on the blanket. This caused the fabric to get caught on the armor, the tension returning to his body as he tried to loosen it. "Maybe it's the silence."
He managed to free the blanket, positioning himself more carefully before facing Beatrix. She had raised her eyebrow. "Silence?"
The bottle opened with a quiet pop, not interesting enough to serve as a distraction.
"Silence." Steiner almost swallowed what popped into his mind after that confirmation, but changed his mind, murmuring: "We've always fought, whether we're alone or not. I think I'm just used to arguing with you."
The thought had sounded silly in his head, and although the silliness didn't fade with saying it aloud, he heard that they were true. He and Beatrix had shared such an intense rivalry, full of barbs from her and knee-jerk reaction from him, and even private moments like these had been spent with tossing of insults. Their loathing for each other had been infamous; he knew that his own soldiers still found it hard to believe that they could be friendly to each other. If there had ever been any talk about them before this night, the rumors had simply refused to be believed and spread.
Maybe he still waited to hear contempt in her voice, and expected a foolish reaction from himself. He looked Beatrix in the eye, trying to read her and failing. Perhaps she too was still stuck in old habits, her wariness more secret than his.
"Would you ever have thought that we would end up like this? Together?"
A thoughtful fold appeared between Beatrix's eyebrows. "No." She had placed two wine glasses before her, the bottle tilted for a pour, but she put it aside and set the glasses away as well, reaching out for his face. Her skin felt rough when her palm came to contact with his cheek, almost hot compared to the chilling air.
"You see, Steiner, I never expected any man to live up to my standards." And perhaps the rivalry itself was still there too, as his first reaction to her words was irritation, and he almost mistook her amused smile for mockery. He calmed himself down, repeating her words in his mind. The layers of them fell off one by one, and his eyes widened when he realized the meaning beneath them.
He wanted to turn his face away from her, but chose to stare at her chin instead. The smile she wore was still amused, the barest curve on her lips.
"You think that I did?" His voice was odd without its edges, so mild. He watched her smile widen, her lips part as she continued:
"Believe? I've known it for a long time." He watched her tongue move over her upper lip in a predator's lick, leaving moist shine on her mouth. "You and I make a wonderful team. I can't imagine a better indicator than that."
He watched her lips near his own, lush and soft and absolutely determined. He was defenseless before them.
He had stopped watching altogether when her mouth was a breath away from his, and a whisper reached his ears:
"You can do it, Steiner!"
It wasn't Beatrix who had whispered, and it certainly wasn't Steiner himself. He could feel his irritation return in a flood as it dawned to him who it had to be. He was done being pleasant to Zidane's friends.
* * *
Beatrix was counting to his next apology.
He had apologized thrice already. First apology had taken place when he had chased the Tantalus out of the roof, nearly rushing away entirely to pursue them before he remembered Beatrix. The second had taken place when they had left the theatre, and the third had followed it too fast for Beatrix to dismiss the second one, and he didn't listen to her accept both of them afterwards. They were almost back to the palace now, and she could tell that the fourth apology was on its way, a big and wordful one that had been building up for a while.
There was still plenty of time for it to come out, so she decided there would be no harm in eliminating it before he could begin with it.
"Steiner?" She had underestimated him; the apology seemed to be already there, his mouth ready to open and blurt it out, so she said quickly: "I have really enjoyed this night."
The apology stepped politely aside to give room for a smile.
"I have enjoyed it too." Steiner couldn't, however, resist a slight frown, adding in sullen tone: "If only Baku and others had kept their curiosity in line."
"Waiting to hear what just happened must have been too much for them." Their arms had been unhooked during this walk, mostly due to Steiner's embarrassment, but he didn't resist when Beatrix fixed the situation now, slipping her arm around his.
"Most likely," Steiner agreed, shrugging. "Only that I have no intention of telling any of them anything."
"I don't doubt that." She leaned a little against him as they strode side by side, resting her cheek against his shoulder.
"I would have told Zidane." A breeze brushed over the streets, strong enough to make Beatrix's skirts move, the flap of that nearly strong enough to cover Steiner's deep sigh. "I won't say a thing to anybody now, but I would have told him."
He fell silent, his brows furrowed, but without their usual strict lines. Beatrix had expected his voice to be full of grief when he mentioned Zidane, but what she had heard was sorrow that had mellowed to longing, wistful memories. She could tell that he was collecting his thoughts, the need to speak there, but she didn't say a word herself. He could tell what he had on his heart without any leads from her.
Another sigh, then words:
"I can't see myself being here if he hadn't entered my life. He was this most irritating, enraging little-!" He paused, almost apologetic, but eased quickly. If he and Beatrix had been equally hateful to each other, Steiner's reactions to Zidane had always been stronger than Zidane's to him, and it was a well-known thing. "But he changed me. He made me let go of my pride."
His pace slowed to near stillness, the furrow now gone.
"None of this would have happened if I still had that pride. The armor, the theatre-" He breathed sharply. "I wouldn't have been here at all."
Another sharp breath and he was silent, caught in a rush of thoughts, which Beatrix understood. She knew exactly what he meant, how he felt like. Zidane had been a lesser character in her life than his, but his impact had spread wide, forcing Beatrix too to make impossible choices and see things she had been blind to before. And she knew the pride, the unyielding, painful thing that it was. How difficult it was to give it up.
She had Zidane to thank for too. Wind blew over them again, as if in an attempt to soothe the sudden devastation she felt away.
"That's something I had never thought of either," Steiner continued, his voice still soft. "That he could teach me something. I still think that he's the biggest misfortune I've ever encountered."
"Of course," Beatrix agreed. One always learned more from misfortunes, after all. And Zidane was a lesson that both of them had needed.
"But I don't regret that encounter," Steiner said, echoing her thoughts. They were on the courtyard again, the moment of parting near. Steiner stopped walking and turned to face her fully, taking her hands, his voice still quiet as he said: "I know that tonight wasn't perfect, but I would really like it if we did this again."
She shrugged his hands away, reaching out to cup his face before he got a chance to look disappointed. "Hearing that makes me happy."
His hands had slid down midway her arms, his fingers curling loosely around them. As if he didn't quite dare to believe what he had just heard. "Any particular reason why?" he asked, blinking fast.
Beatrix stroked the smooth, delicate skin beneath his eyes with her thumbs, looking into his dark, long-lashed eyes. She was aware that there guards nearby to witness this and she didn't care. "I've already made arrangements."
She saw delight in his eyes, heard the unsaid words of excitement, so there wasn't any need for her to actually hear them. She pulled his face down to hers, inhaling his scent that was without noblemen's exotic smells, feeling his breath shudder as she took his mouth.
Steiner made a tiny wince in his throat, but didn't say a thing as he wrapped his arms around her.
* * *
Back in his quarters, Steiner realized that he still didn't have his sword back.
It irritated him, and he could envision a scene with him chasing after Baku and the rest of them around the theatre and perhaps all the way to Lindblum, but he decided not to think about it. Instead he prepared himself for the unavoidable task of peeling himself out of the armor, but before he started, he sought out the one mirror he had, checking his reflection one more time.
The armor still looked wrong, but maybe he would get used to it, or get a better one done to him in the future. But hopefully the day would come when he could drop all kinds of shells for good, and face Beatrix as himself only.
Author/Artist: bofoddity
Fandom: Final Fantasy IX
Pairing: Steiner/Beatrix
Rating: PG
Prompt: FF9 - Beatrix/Steiner - First date, Beatrix must be in a dress, any rating.
Disclaimer: I'm not a native speaker of English, so my phrasing may not be perfect. Also, Final Fantasy IX isn't mine and the story isn't written for profit.
Beatrix couldn't remember the last time she had dressed like this. In one of Queen Brahne's dress balls, most likely, which had often been more challenging than any battle she ever participated in - only the princess had ever appreciated Beatrix's soldier humor - but they had meant nothing to Beatrix, fading to nothing in her mind. So the sight in the mirror was not something she had expected to face willingly, even less with genuine excitement.
She squared her shoulders, wrinkling her nose at the slight frizz in her hair, a protest against the tight braiding. Otherwise she was very pleased with what she saw, sharing a smirk with her reflection.
Yellow wasn't a color that Beatrix favored, cheerful and carefree in a way she didn't wish to be, but its soft, spring light shade flattered her, and it was close enough to white to make her feel comfortable. (To her, colors tended to be mere accessories.) The dress was simple in design, leaving her neck and shoulders bare and embracing her like a glove that had adjusted to her hand over the years, smooth and comfortable on her skin. The skirts flowed easily to her movements, adding to her comfort.
Beatrix felt good, but she had a feeling that her date was feeling exactly the opposite. That's what he thought at least; Beatrix was pleased with herself, but that didn't mean that there wasn't a nervous tingle in her belly, absent confidence in the smile in the mirror.
"How do I look like?" she asked, turning to the young soldier who had stood silent behind her. The soldier straightened her posture, her face shadowed by her helmet, but Beatrix thought she saw traces of confusion, as if the soldier didn't know what to exactly think of her. Which wasn't a surprising thing; the few times the soldiers had seen their general dressed up like this had been subjects for hearty laughter and moments of bonding between battles, her dresses quickly hidden into closets and forgotten. Beatrix suspected that she appeared a little coltish right now as well, like a young girl with her plaited hair and hesitant smile. She hoped that the soldier didn't think her incapable of appreciating an honest opinion.
"You are very beautiful, Madam." The soldier's articulation was careful, but there was an awed hush in her voice, the curve of her mouth shy as she smiled to Beatrix. But the soldier hesitated, considering something very carefully before saying: "But perhaps a sword is a little too much?"
Her fingers had been looping around Save The Queen's handle, which had been leaning against the wall next to the mirror. Her fingers halted now, her brows furrowing. "I'm never without my sword."
"But you're spending an evening with Captain Steiner," the soldier insisted, her obscured face pinkening a little at her own daring. But she didn't back off, adding in a negotiating tone: "If I'm permitted to say, this isn't a battle you are heading to."
Beatrix looked at her hand, which now had full hold on Save The Queen and was ready to lift it. She picked the sword up, turning to the mirror again.
"It isn't," she admitted, raising the blade of the sword. Whatever coltishness was present in Beatrix without sword, there was nothing young about the way she held her weapon, with warrior's steady hands.
It was the warrior that Adelbert Steiner was familiar with, not a woman in fine clothing. She had all intentions to leave Save The Queen behind in the future, but this was only the first night they went out together. She wanted to secure that it wouldn't be the last.
"I only want him to feel comfortable with me." The brown belt and the sheath were as elegant as they could possibly be with a dress, but they felt familiar, so she wore them happily. She sheathed her sword, checking her appearance for final time. She was ready.
"If that's what it takes, Madam." The soldier didn't sound entirely convinced, and Beatrix began to gather a fuller explanation in her mind when she was interrupted: "Captain appears to be waiting for you down there."
Beatrix's eyebrows quirked high, the pounding of her heart fast. Steiner had warned her earlier that he would have a thing or two to take care of before he would arrive to fetch her, and she had fully expected him to take longer.
"How does he look like?" She tried to imagine Steiner standing outside, his face as strict as always, hands clasped behind his back, unless he was holding his sword in front of him, in an unconscious imitation of Beatrix herself.
"It's hard to tell." From the mirror, she saw that soldier had moved over to the window, but leaning away from it instead of forward. She fixed this, only to lean backwards again. "His armor is very shiny."
This time her eyebrows made a leap.
* * *
Steiner's new armor had turned out to be very displeasing.
He no longer had memory of why exactly he had decided to get one. As lovingly as his usual one was mocked, it had served him well and showed no signs of failing him in the future, so he had felt genuine guilt when he had put it away today. However, Beatrix deserved a companion who looked like someone of her worth, and since the Tantalus was in Alexandria, he had turned to them for help.
"You look awesome!" Baku had roared, his voice both the thunder and the lightning that struck all too close to Steiner's ears.
"Dashingly handsome" Blank had confirmed, his encouraging pat clinking rather than creaking on Steiner's armor.
"A true charmer!" Only Cinna had hesitated after his compliment, fiddling his fingers. "But are you sure you don't want any advice about talking to her?"
One long stare for him had been enough to silence them all, and soon they had ushered Steiner out of the theatre. "You bring her here, and we're sure to provide her fantastic entertainment," Baku had promised, and left Steiner alone on the street all too fast.
He was sure that Baku had meant exactly what he had said, and he had desperately convinced himself that it actually boded well for him. The only choice after that had been making his way back to the palace, to stand beneath the window of Beatrix's quarters.
The damn armor hadn't made one single sound during the walk. That only had been enough to unnerve him greatly, his heart beating fast in his chest. That didn't make enough of a sound either.
He could tell that everybody moving around in the courtyard had granted him at least one glance, and they were mostly given out of his sight, denying him all the guesses about their nature. Were they impressed with what they saw? Maybe he was mysterious stranger in their eyes, the first one brave enough to openly woo the glorious Beatrix. Or could they tell immediately that it was Steiner, trying to fit in an armor that was obviously out of his league? Or maybe they were pleased with his improvement, approving that he was finally trying to be the right kind of person to stand by Beatrix's side.
If they were only in Steiner's sight, another of his stares would have stopped their ponderings before they even began. In fact, he probably didn't even need to stare. His frown had sunk too deep into his face, turning into mockery of the expression that had grown and matured as much as Steiner himself had, and he didn't doubt it was a frightening sight. His armor was also reflecting light too easily, causing birds to sway during their flights. He was also pretty sure he had forgotten something, but couldn't tell what. Ill omens kept following each other.
It had been the Tantalus that had convinced him that it would do him no good to think of his evening with Beatrix as a battle to survive. How he wished he had closed his ears.
He was distracted from his moody thoughts when he caught movement from the window, seeing that somebody was looking outside, most likely at him. Steiner couldn't tell if it was Beatrix, but he straightened himself anyway, tilting his chin upwards. Despite his many - endless - discomforts he was determined to make everything memorable for Beatrix, all the way from his own appearance to the night cap he hoped she would enjoy with him in the end of the night. Zidane would be proud of him. If only Zidane knew how much that pride mattered to him.
"Steiner?"
He never had a chance to know what Zidane's pride was like, but he knew what the mocking laughter was like that would have surely rung out now. "Beatrix," he breathed, seeking her with his eyes.
* * *
Steiner's eyes had been firmly fixed on Beatrix's window when she had come outside, his body so unmoving that he had resembled an exceptionally shiny statue. She was honestly surprised to see him stiffen even more when she called out his name.
"Beatrix." He turned his head to her direction carefully, as if he was unsure of what he would face. Her displeasure? She hoped not. But then he absorbed the sight of her, the strain on his face easing away as he stared at her, breathless.
Beatrix herself, however, was struck by how different he looked from second earlier, how tense he had been. Was he really that anxious? She could feel her own calm loosening over this, fear creeping in, and she brushed a shaky hand over her hair.
Then Steiner's mouth curved into an easy smile, and she felt great relief.
"You look stunning." His voice matched his awe-struck face, his smile widening even more, and Beatrix felt her face warm with pleasure. She returned his smile, closing the little distance between them first by walking over to him, then by reaching out to take his hands. He stilled first at the contact, his expression breaking with emotion again - oh, how nervous he was - before he clasped her fingers, sure and tight. Beatrix found that very welcome; another man might have expected that she suddenly required delicate treatment, the soldier in her lost in the folds of her dress.
"You look very fine as well," she said, looking him over once more while his eyes grew excited. He was wearing a finely constructed armor, the smooth steel catching every single ray of light, which made him almost difficult to look at. The armor made her think of fairytale knights, who rode smoothly in and out of trouble and away from the silly noblemen who wailed in their praise, only Steiner carried himself with genuine grace, kind that had been gained in real wars.
Something, however, wasn't there. "You're missing your sword."
Steiner's face quickly crumpled in a frown. "I knew they couldn't resist taking something from me."
"Tantalus?" she inquired, struggling to hide amusement from her face. To think that he had been distracted enough to allow Zidane's friends to slip past his defenses.
"Exactly-" He paused, looking at her in surprise. "How did you know?"
She shrugged. "Who else would have even dared?"
"I should put that daring in line," Steiner muttered, his forehead wrinkling when Beatrix laughed.
"Hopefully you're going to do that later," she said, reaching up to straighten his helmet. There seemed to be some dirt on the otherwise pure white feather that pointed upwards from the helmet, and she rose to her toes for a moment to brush it off. "This is our night, or am I mistaken?"
The wrinkles smoothed out of sight, his smile returning.
"Certainly not," he vowed, stepping backwards from her reach and offering her his arm, and for the first time in her life Beatrix was charmed by this gentleman's gesture. "Shall we?"
"Of course." She hooked his arm around his, and allowed herself to be lead.
* * *
The armor was still far too silent as he and Beatrix made their way to Ruby's theatre, but this time he didn't mind it. Nor did he mind the gazes they drew to themselves, curious and impressed ones, few that were confused. Never had anybody imagined that two former rivals would be walking side by side like this, content with each other's company. Perhaps people would start whispering to each other, wondering how long this had been going on, wondering how long it was going to last.
Steiner managed to put aside all his fears about the last part until they finally made it to the theatre. What he saw there surprised him.
When Steiner had been in the theatre earlier, the only people he had seen were the Tantalus, while he had heard the actors practice somewhere out of sight. But now the theatre was swarming with people, and there seemed to be more on the way. One glance over his shoulder informed Steiner that there were several other couples trailing after him and Beatrix, as well as few lonely people. All of them dressed for a fine evening.
"I had no idea this place was so popular," Beatrix commented from his side as they walked through the entrance, turning to glare at somebody who had tried to shove her to the side. The culprit in question was quick in his apologies, making sure to skip as far away from them as possible.
Steiner hadn't had any idea either. He had known that it was a well-liked theatre, attracting both audience and well-known performers, but when Baku and others had assured him that he could just arrive with Beatrix, so he had assumed that finding good seats wouldn't give him trouble. But when he looked around, he saw tickets in people's hands, and that made him sweat behind his ears.
"There you are!"
He was quite sure that he had never been this happy to hear Cinna's voice. Or to Cinna him as the small man ran towards them, dressed in a light blue suit that looked like it was tailor’s work. Steiner couldn't help but wonder if he had blackmailed somebody to get that outfit done for him, and he couldn't keep a certain comment from slipping out as soon as Cinna stood before him:
"I believe you have my sword stored somewhere."
To Cinna's credit, his wide smile remained on as tightly as a mask.
"Why, we assumed that sharp objects would only get in a way!" But Cinna was quick to turn to Beatrix, bowing to her in a way that didn't seem to be kind to his back, considering the tiny whimper that Steiner's ears caught. "General, you look absolutely magnificent."
"Thank you." Beatrix accepted his compliment with a cool nod, her face unreadable as she looked around. But Steiner knew she was pleased with those words. "The theatre seems to be doing well," Beatrix said, stepping closer to Steiner to give room for people walking past them.
"Yes, our profit has been great!" Cinna held his head high with pride, adjusting his ruffled collar.
"You mean Ruby's profit," Steiner commented, keeping his irritation in line when Cinna pouted at him. He had promised himself a long time ago that he would be nice to Zidane's friends, but sometimes they really tested his willingness to keep that promise. "But yes, there appears to be quite a crowd here. I hope everybody has a seat."
Cinna seemed to be very eager to get credit tonight; he caught Steiner's very vague hint. "No problem! We have reserved a balcony for you!" He whipped around and began to force his way through the crowd, gesturing Steiner and Beatrix to follow. "The balcony, in fact. It's very small." He looked over his shoulder to give Steiner and Beatrix an outrageous wink, pushing somebody out of his way without any consideration or shame. "I believe you two have to cuddle up really close."
His voice was just all too knowing, as if he had looked into Steiner's mind and seen the secret thoughts there. His face flooded with color, while Beatrix had no reaction at all. Steiner knew that she was very entertained behind her casual expression, hopefully in a good way.
"This way," Cinna urged as they reached the stairs leading upstairs, unaware of the strangling hands that Steiner was imagining around his throat. "You'll have complete privacy there." Cinna bounced his way up the stairs, halting to wait at the top of them for Beatrix and Steiner to catch up with them as he dug up a key from his pocket. Compared to the neatly decorated first floor, the second one was darker and dustier, indicating that people didn't have much use for the balcony. Ruby herself, however, seemed to value it, seeing that it was behind a steel door with heavy locks.
"Here we go!" Cinna unlocked the door and pushed it open, stepping aside to allow Steiner and Beatrix to enter. He seemed to be careful to stay outside himself, as if he knew that Steiner felt like tossing him off the balcony. Not that he wouldn't just bounce back to his feet like a cat after the fall. "Enjoy your evening!" And indeed he slipped away like a feline with those words, and Steiner was left alone with Beatrix.
His first reaction to that was to test that the door wasn't locked; it would be a shame if they ended up spending the rest of the evening try to get it open after the play ended. It wasn’t, which allowed Steiner to take a more thorough look at the balcony. Unlike the rest of the floor, the balcony itself was tidy and pleasant, although Cinna had exaggerated its size. There was plenty of room to move around in and the two chairs reserved for the viewer had inches of space between them. Beatrix had already sat down in the other chair, and Steiner walked over to join her.
"I wonder where these have been stolen from," he said as he sat down, perhaps a little pettily. It was entirely possible that Ruby had been able to purchase these chairs herself instead of counting on the Tantalus's help.
Beatrix had taken the theatre program in her hands, reading through the synopsis of the play. "This sounds like a familiar story."
His heart dropped at Beatrix's words. It had taken him long to find a play that might be to her liking, but maybe he should have investigated her tastes further. "Have you seen it before?"
"No, no." The synopsis seemed to be very interesting as Beatrix barely heard his question. "Most stories get repeated anyway. But the ghost stories seem to be very common nowadays."
"Not many of them are comedies." A factor that could have improved many of those plays, in fact.
"A good point." Beatrix put the program down, turning to Steiner with a thoughtful expression. "Maybe this is something that the Queen would enjoy as well?"
Perhaps there had been a joke waiting on his tongue. Perhaps it would have been a funny joke as well, but now he felt it stick to his throat, nodding as he turned his attention to the stage, where the play was about to begin. He smiled briefly in Beatrix's direction as he felt her hand rest down on top of his, but his thoughts were trailing elsewhere.
The ghost in the play was a woman, that much he knew without even looking at the program, but from the moment Beatrix had mentioned the Queen, Steiner had began to think of the ghost as a man. It was the perfect role for Zidane.
* * *
Beatrix spent the first half of the play wanting to hit her forehead against something. Railing of the balcony was conveniently right in front of her, made of strong wood against which her head would surely make a nice sound, but she hadn't completely stopped being a general tonight, she still had her reputation to shield. So all she had left to do was curse her own foolishness, her thoughtless tongue.
Why had she ever thought that mentioning the Queen would be a good idea? She knew that Garnet was still grieving, and she knew Steiner could not ignore that grief, nor the source of it. He still grieved himself. It wasn't the kind of thing one should bring up on a date.
To her fortune, despite the moodiness she sensed from Steiner, she could tell that the comedy was fulfilling its duty. On the stage, the ghost rolled her eyes and sighed in deep frustration as her former and alive fiancé moaned over her unfair death, blinding himself to a friend who could easily be more to him. While following that did draw smile and two from Steiner, the familiar irritation was more welcome sight to Beatrix.
"What a fool," he whispered with contempt, his brows nearly knitting together and turning into one single line as the fiancé broke into yet another set of moans, causing the ghost to hide her face in her hands. Neither noticed how the devoted friend was approached by the fourth important player, a mysterious courter with mustache that usually decorated the faces of villains. "Does he really think that he's honoring his lover that way? Idiot."
Beatrix smiled. "It appears that he will receive what he deserves," she said, watching as the fiancé's friend was suddenly in no hurry to get back to the ungrateful man she had been looking after. "I believe you expected different sort of comedy."
"Seems like it," he admitted. They fell back into silence after that.
As the play proceeded towards its end, Beatrix allowed her eyes to wander away from the stage and over to the audience, catching the sight of Ruby. Maybe it was the weight of her glare that made Ruby react, but the other woman turned her head and glanced up at the balcony, grinning and waving her hand through the air. Everything’s set. She forced more serious look on her face and lowered her hand when she caught people looking at her, and so she missed Beatrix's approving nod. As did Steiner, who was now much happier with the play as the moronic fiancé got what he had earned, snapping to attention when Beatrix rubbed his knuckles with her fingertips.
"There's something I want to show you after the play is over."'
His casual reaction consisted of the tiniest jerk of his eyebrows.
"Not the backstage, I hope."
Beatrix sighed. "So much for it, then…"
One of the downsides of her humor was that people tended to take it too seriously, so she quickly added: "Just come with me. I hope that you will like it."
There was nothing casual about his reaction this time; his eyes widened with surprise.
"How could I not?" he asked, and the sincerity in his voice stunned Beatrix to silence while the audience below broke into applause.
She shrugged the stun away, standing up.
"Come." She took his hand when he stood up as well, and lead him out of the balcony.
Beatrix could hear how people were moving around downstairs, making their leave, and Steiner was about to join them, moving towards the stairs when Beatrix held him back, leading him to other direction instead. Steiner seemed to hesitate a little, but followed her nevertheless. "I wondered if it was the backstage after all…"
"Fool," she laughed as they reached another flight of stairs leading up, taking the fist step. "I considered it, but the air turned out to be too stuffy."
Steiner snorted. "You must have tested it on a good day," he said, taking larger steps to not to lag behind.
"Yes, I believe they agreed with you." She reached the top of the stairs and opened the door, blinking against the slight wind coming from outside.
* * *
His armor finally made a sound when he followed Beatrix to the roof, the smallest creak that nearly made Steiner jump out of his skin. His own armor would have topped that sound with pathetic ease, so the reaction was humiliating. "I've had such a strange day," he began, ready to launch into bigger explanation before he noticed just what Beatrix had prepared for them.
He had been on a picnic only once in his life, and that event had been strictly tied to his duties to the royal family. His job had been to keep Garnet content while her mother had entertained her guests, and while he had completed the task successfully ("Your presence really encourages her to behave well!"), he could have done without memories of unbearable heat, insects that found the little of his skin that was bare too tempting to resist and monsters that lurked around the quests, always lunging for the little princess first.
Now the day had cooled into pleasant night, there was not one insect in sight - most likely due to some trickery - monsters even less. And instead of observing in horror as nobles carelessly tossed food to wild animals, he watched as Beatrix walked over to the white blanket and sat down on it, picking up a bottle of wine. And instead of ensuring that the princess was comfortable and didn't go wandering off, he could sit down himself. With Beatrix.
He made his way to her with tiniest little steps, and almost remained standing.
Beatrix was in process of opening the bottle, but Steiner's fidgety behavior didn't escape her attention, and she looked at him curiously as he finally joined her on the blanket. "You don't need to be nervous around me," she said, her voice empty of judgment.
Out of thoughtfulness to him, he knew. There was no reason for the sudden ridiculous behavior from him, and it frustrated him that there wasn't one. Maybe then he could have been able to fix the problem, whatever it was.
"I know that." He sighed, taking a more comfortable position on the blanket. This caused the fabric to get caught on the armor, the tension returning to his body as he tried to loosen it. "Maybe it's the silence."
He managed to free the blanket, positioning himself more carefully before facing Beatrix. She had raised her eyebrow. "Silence?"
The bottle opened with a quiet pop, not interesting enough to serve as a distraction.
"Silence." Steiner almost swallowed what popped into his mind after that confirmation, but changed his mind, murmuring: "We've always fought, whether we're alone or not. I think I'm just used to arguing with you."
The thought had sounded silly in his head, and although the silliness didn't fade with saying it aloud, he heard that they were true. He and Beatrix had shared such an intense rivalry, full of barbs from her and knee-jerk reaction from him, and even private moments like these had been spent with tossing of insults. Their loathing for each other had been infamous; he knew that his own soldiers still found it hard to believe that they could be friendly to each other. If there had ever been any talk about them before this night, the rumors had simply refused to be believed and spread.
Maybe he still waited to hear contempt in her voice, and expected a foolish reaction from himself. He looked Beatrix in the eye, trying to read her and failing. Perhaps she too was still stuck in old habits, her wariness more secret than his.
"Would you ever have thought that we would end up like this? Together?"
A thoughtful fold appeared between Beatrix's eyebrows. "No." She had placed two wine glasses before her, the bottle tilted for a pour, but she put it aside and set the glasses away as well, reaching out for his face. Her skin felt rough when her palm came to contact with his cheek, almost hot compared to the chilling air.
"You see, Steiner, I never expected any man to live up to my standards." And perhaps the rivalry itself was still there too, as his first reaction to her words was irritation, and he almost mistook her amused smile for mockery. He calmed himself down, repeating her words in his mind. The layers of them fell off one by one, and his eyes widened when he realized the meaning beneath them.
He wanted to turn his face away from her, but chose to stare at her chin instead. The smile she wore was still amused, the barest curve on her lips.
"You think that I did?" His voice was odd without its edges, so mild. He watched her smile widen, her lips part as she continued:
"Believe? I've known it for a long time." He watched her tongue move over her upper lip in a predator's lick, leaving moist shine on her mouth. "You and I make a wonderful team. I can't imagine a better indicator than that."
He watched her lips near his own, lush and soft and absolutely determined. He was defenseless before them.
He had stopped watching altogether when her mouth was a breath away from his, and a whisper reached his ears:
"You can do it, Steiner!"
It wasn't Beatrix who had whispered, and it certainly wasn't Steiner himself. He could feel his irritation return in a flood as it dawned to him who it had to be. He was done being pleasant to Zidane's friends.
* * *
Beatrix was counting to his next apology.
He had apologized thrice already. First apology had taken place when he had chased the Tantalus out of the roof, nearly rushing away entirely to pursue them before he remembered Beatrix. The second had taken place when they had left the theatre, and the third had followed it too fast for Beatrix to dismiss the second one, and he didn't listen to her accept both of them afterwards. They were almost back to the palace now, and she could tell that the fourth apology was on its way, a big and wordful one that had been building up for a while.
There was still plenty of time for it to come out, so she decided there would be no harm in eliminating it before he could begin with it.
"Steiner?" She had underestimated him; the apology seemed to be already there, his mouth ready to open and blurt it out, so she said quickly: "I have really enjoyed this night."
The apology stepped politely aside to give room for a smile.
"I have enjoyed it too." Steiner couldn't, however, resist a slight frown, adding in sullen tone: "If only Baku and others had kept their curiosity in line."
"Waiting to hear what just happened must have been too much for them." Their arms had been unhooked during this walk, mostly due to Steiner's embarrassment, but he didn't resist when Beatrix fixed the situation now, slipping her arm around his.
"Most likely," Steiner agreed, shrugging. "Only that I have no intention of telling any of them anything."
"I don't doubt that." She leaned a little against him as they strode side by side, resting her cheek against his shoulder.
"I would have told Zidane." A breeze brushed over the streets, strong enough to make Beatrix's skirts move, the flap of that nearly strong enough to cover Steiner's deep sigh. "I won't say a thing to anybody now, but I would have told him."
He fell silent, his brows furrowed, but without their usual strict lines. Beatrix had expected his voice to be full of grief when he mentioned Zidane, but what she had heard was sorrow that had mellowed to longing, wistful memories. She could tell that he was collecting his thoughts, the need to speak there, but she didn't say a word herself. He could tell what he had on his heart without any leads from her.
Another sigh, then words:
"I can't see myself being here if he hadn't entered my life. He was this most irritating, enraging little-!" He paused, almost apologetic, but eased quickly. If he and Beatrix had been equally hateful to each other, Steiner's reactions to Zidane had always been stronger than Zidane's to him, and it was a well-known thing. "But he changed me. He made me let go of my pride."
His pace slowed to near stillness, the furrow now gone.
"None of this would have happened if I still had that pride. The armor, the theatre-" He breathed sharply. "I wouldn't have been here at all."
Another sharp breath and he was silent, caught in a rush of thoughts, which Beatrix understood. She knew exactly what he meant, how he felt like. Zidane had been a lesser character in her life than his, but his impact had spread wide, forcing Beatrix too to make impossible choices and see things she had been blind to before. And she knew the pride, the unyielding, painful thing that it was. How difficult it was to give it up.
She had Zidane to thank for too. Wind blew over them again, as if in an attempt to soothe the sudden devastation she felt away.
"That's something I had never thought of either," Steiner continued, his voice still soft. "That he could teach me something. I still think that he's the biggest misfortune I've ever encountered."
"Of course," Beatrix agreed. One always learned more from misfortunes, after all. And Zidane was a lesson that both of them had needed.
"But I don't regret that encounter," Steiner said, echoing her thoughts. They were on the courtyard again, the moment of parting near. Steiner stopped walking and turned to face her fully, taking her hands, his voice still quiet as he said: "I know that tonight wasn't perfect, but I would really like it if we did this again."
She shrugged his hands away, reaching out to cup his face before he got a chance to look disappointed. "Hearing that makes me happy."
His hands had slid down midway her arms, his fingers curling loosely around them. As if he didn't quite dare to believe what he had just heard. "Any particular reason why?" he asked, blinking fast.
Beatrix stroked the smooth, delicate skin beneath his eyes with her thumbs, looking into his dark, long-lashed eyes. She was aware that there guards nearby to witness this and she didn't care. "I've already made arrangements."
She saw delight in his eyes, heard the unsaid words of excitement, so there wasn't any need for her to actually hear them. She pulled his face down to hers, inhaling his scent that was without noblemen's exotic smells, feeling his breath shudder as she took his mouth.
Steiner made a tiny wince in his throat, but didn't say a thing as he wrapped his arms around her.
* * *
Back in his quarters, Steiner realized that he still didn't have his sword back.
It irritated him, and he could envision a scene with him chasing after Baku and the rest of them around the theatre and perhaps all the way to Lindblum, but he decided not to think about it. Instead he prepared himself for the unavoidable task of peeling himself out of the armor, but before he started, he sought out the one mirror he had, checking his reflection one more time.
The armor still looked wrong, but maybe he would get used to it, or get a better one done to him in the future. But hopefully the day would come when he could drop all kinds of shells for good, and face Beatrix as himself only.