it is never a dull day in LJ land
In case comments over there remain screened, here is my response to stellamira's latest response to a lot of people's responses:
Well.
I appreciated your apology and your explanation. I apologize for not being able to reply to you before you screened comments -- we all have offline lives, as you say, and it was probably better anyway that I took some time to calm down.
I knew this would blow up as soon as I posted publicly about it in my own LJ. I actually slept on it for a night before I posted publicly, because I wanted to make sure it was worth it. I was still angry and offended the next morning, so to me, it was worth any resulting trouble. But I understand that for you the trouble was different, and I understand that from your perspective, you feel very hard-done-by. I'm sorry for that.
I'm not sure what accord we can come to, if any. I still feel that you made thoughtless choices about the story, and I still find the original version hurtful. I'm also not sure even now that you really understand why I and other people found it so offensive. (It probably doesn't help that there are plenty of people who don't seem to understand it either and will likely tell you there was nothing wrong with your story. I guess beyond a certain point, there's really no way to make people "get it.")
But I do appreciate that you edited the offending paragraphs out, although it was never my intention to force you to change your writing. I just wanted you to think about it from another perspective.
Anyway. I suppose all we can really do is acknowledge that there's hurt on both sides, and move on. I am going to continue supporting and responding to the discussion in my LJ and in others, because I think it can only be a good thing for fandom to talk about these issues. So that means of course that people will continue to take sides, have opinions, express themselves, rake you over the coals, rake me over the coals, etc. Then it'll probably fade out until the next big thing happens.
So maybe I'll see you during the next round, eh?
*
In the meantime, I would like to do a roundup of links on all the various commentary and reactions and meta, because as I said in the other post, there are all kinds of threads and topics and arguments to be made here, on all sides, and many people are making them. Maybe tomorrow morning if I wake up early enough. I am still planning on responding to everyone's comments in my LJ -- for which, seriously, THANK YOU -- but pretty much everything in RL is in a crazy transitional stressful state for me right now. So please bear with me for another day or two.
Well.
I appreciated your apology and your explanation. I apologize for not being able to reply to you before you screened comments -- we all have offline lives, as you say, and it was probably better anyway that I took some time to calm down.
I knew this would blow up as soon as I posted publicly about it in my own LJ. I actually slept on it for a night before I posted publicly, because I wanted to make sure it was worth it. I was still angry and offended the next morning, so to me, it was worth any resulting trouble. But I understand that for you the trouble was different, and I understand that from your perspective, you feel very hard-done-by. I'm sorry for that.
I'm not sure what accord we can come to, if any. I still feel that you made thoughtless choices about the story, and I still find the original version hurtful. I'm also not sure even now that you really understand why I and other people found it so offensive. (It probably doesn't help that there are plenty of people who don't seem to understand it either and will likely tell you there was nothing wrong with your story. I guess beyond a certain point, there's really no way to make people "get it.")
But I do appreciate that you edited the offending paragraphs out, although it was never my intention to force you to change your writing. I just wanted you to think about it from another perspective.
Anyway. I suppose all we can really do is acknowledge that there's hurt on both sides, and move on. I am going to continue supporting and responding to the discussion in my LJ and in others, because I think it can only be a good thing for fandom to talk about these issues. So that means of course that people will continue to take sides, have opinions, express themselves, rake you over the coals, rake me over the coals, etc. Then it'll probably fade out until the next big thing happens.
So maybe I'll see you during the next round, eh?
*
In the meantime, I would like to do a roundup of links on all the various commentary and reactions and meta, because as I said in the other post, there are all kinds of threads and topics and arguments to be made here, on all sides, and many people are making them. Maybe tomorrow morning if I wake up early enough. I am still planning on responding to everyone's comments in my LJ -- for which, seriously, THANK YOU -- but pretty much everything in RL is in a crazy transitional stressful state for me right now. So please bear with me for another day or two.