i frequent LJ too much, obviously

[hesselives]

i don't know, you guys. i have over 100 Inception fics to read, accumulated in some sort of mutilated to-read list, jumbled from various anyone and everyone's recs. just looking at them is starting to make me cry. and is it so unfair of me to want to only stick to what my f-listers are producing, because it's a quiet circle but a mighty one? and i

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I AM ALWAYS PREPARED TO GET WHAT I ASK FOR.

[hesselives]

1 & 2) I SEE WE ARE LONG-LOST TWINS. except you probably weren't a bit of a compulsive liar in the second grade, and had your mother called in to discuss this fact. to this day, i have no idea why the hell i did something like that. PROBABLY A CRY FOR ATTENTION. IDK. Hitchens FTW, and i love the whole prayer-around-his-cancer wank, and how BAMF he is in the face of death.

3) lol, i wouldn't go so far as to say i don't believe in love. but i am SKEPTIC as hell about it. like it's my job. i tend to anticipate any moment of happiness as being on the brink of a rapid descent into screamfests and general shittiness. oh hi, pessimism. there you are. however, i absolutely don't believe in marriage as an institution. it is crazy talk, all of it. i will mostly like end up in a living-together-forever-not-married situation (a la Julia Gillard), which would be far more relaxing than marriage, as me and the SO would unconsciously appreciate the easy exit route option. christ, who wants to be locked down? also, i attended just one wedding, and have no desire to do so again. D: it was boring, drawn-out, sappy, cliched...IDK, everything i wage wars against.

4) LOL. had i been there, i would've grinned madly and ask a lot of questions, prompting another hour-long discussion about phalluses. because, really, how can you sum up phalluses in lit in just one hour? xD my own moments include using the phrase "EVEN THE POPE WANTS TO SMACK THAT" as a valid argument in a poorly-induced "people are inherently evil/good" class debate. (evil: me + 4 others. good: 22. you can imagine how it went.) also, i accidentally punched a girl who asked me why i didn't smile more. everyone thought it was on purpose, and i was more than okay with that. and weed. and skipping school to go to an amusement park. and writing a fuck-all paper on the violent/erotic nature of German mysticism. (i think my teacher gave me an A based purely out of fear that i'd flagellate myself otherwise.) and getting the Outstanding English Student award out of a class of 500, which was my way of giving the biggest finger possible to the math/science/tech gifted program i dropped out of senior year.

I'M SORRY, WHERE WAS I. right. 5) i avoid all Ariadne fics out of fear that i would go into apoplectic rage otherwise. but yes, she is definitely one of the most misrepresented in fics. perhaps the most. and i cannot elaborate more on what you've already said because i am bad at this sort of thing. D: BUT I AGREE WITH YOU SO HARD. i am always deeply ashamed of myself whenever i do dress up semi-sluttily to a club/bar because that is the only way i'm convinced i'd ever get male (and female?) attention. sexually, that is. ugh.

Re: I AM ALWAYS PREPARED TO GET WHAT I ASK FOR.

[kirstenlouise]

I considered prefacing #2 with "So, I'm probably an asshole for saying this..." but then I was like, oh, well, fuck it. SHE'LL FIND OUT ANYWAY. Not a compulsive liar, but I punched a girl in the face for making fun of me around that time, so that went well.

NO DEATHBED CONVERSIONS FOR DIEHARDS. ♥

Okay, well I'm a general pessimist, too, so I do get where you're coming from. I'd rather just cohabitate as well. Honestly, though, I can't imagine ever meeting anyone I want to spend the rest of my life with, married or not. I don't see how people can even want to, let alone be expected to. They're making such an unrealistic promise and everyone's OMG SCANDALIZED! when they break it, lol.

I focused on my favorite examples, naturally. I even wrote a short section about a guy smoking a cigar only REALLY, IF YOU READ BETWEEN THE LINES IT WAS A COCK. They remember me well there.

Ah, man, I hate stacked debates like that. I'd play devil's advocate if nothing else. You are truly awesome. YOU WIN, I DON'T KNOW WHAT, BUT YOU DO.

Re: I AM ALWAYS PREPARED TO GET WHAT I ASK FOR.

[hesselives]

WAIT, i forgot to mention that i turned a little klepto in the fourth grade, too. stole candy from the after-school care center and things from K-Mart. (i got caught only for the former, and needless to say, my mom was very disappoint.) no, really. though i would not blame you if you think i'm a compulsive liar right now, as it was all kind of ~surreal times~

i fucking hate when people try to tell me monogamy is natural. WHERE IS THE EVIDENCE. GIMMEH THE PROOF. oddly enough, i am the uber-faithful type if only because that would give me the upper hand forever for when my SO inevitably cheats on me. lol. control issues much.

HNNG. CIGARS. can you tell i have a major oral fixation?

it was the kind of debate that started off nice and logical...until it rapidly devolved into hilarious times and ad hominem attacks. wait, i guess that describes all debates.