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heroes_fic
The Not-Quite Quint(o)essential Collection
A/N: Okay, multiple fics here, but most take place consecutively. All are script form crack!fic crossovers and were written by rampant_chaos8 and me over several months.
If you're only going to read one, read 5. It's the best and actually has a plot. Or 4, which is shorter and still good.
For all:
Rating: PG
Spoiler alert: Seasons 1-3
Warnings: None, unless specified below. All slash is non-graphic and consists largely of awkward silences. How graphic anything is depends solely on your imagination, so if you're really imaginative, it's an R, if not, it's G.
Title: Quintology (2,748 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl1.doc
Characters: Sylar, Spock, Zachary Quinto, misc Keanu characters, Peter, Future!Peter, Heroes Writers, Tim Kring, The Oracle, Milo Ventimiglia, ZQ Fangirls, Greg Grunberg, Half of Heroes Crew, Other Half of Heroes Crew, Awkward Silence
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, Misc Keanu films
Summary: Spock gives Sylar a totally uncalled for nerve-pinch. Sylar is pissed off and decides to kill him - and anyone else in the way - as revenge, when he figures that it would be a better idea to impersonate Zachary Quinto and wreck havoc on the Heroes set.
Title: Quintology 2 (370 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl2.doc
Characters: Sylar, Spock, ZQ, Greg Grunberg, Twitter Followers, Sylar Fangirls, Peter, Milo, Heroes writers, Keanu, Neo
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, The Matrix
Summary: In which Sylar is finally temporarily defeated by fangirls from Twitter
Title: Quintology 3: The Chess Game (823 words) http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtlchessgame.doc
Characters: Sylar, Spock, Constantine, Neo, Keanu
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, The Matrix, Constantine
Summary: Chess game. Sylar vs. Constantine.
Title: In Which Milo Ventimiglia Ends Up on the Neb (1,686 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl3.doc
Characters: Milo, Peter, Misc. Matrix characters
Pairings: Inefficient drunk!Milo/Peter in which nothing much happens
Fandoms: Heroes, The Matrix
Summary: While getting drunk in a bar with a less-drunk Peter, Milo encounters Carrie-Anne Moss and freaks out. She decides that the only way to get rid of him is to let him meet Neo and Trinity.
Title: Quintology 4 (4109 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl4.doc
Characters: ZQ, Milo, Peter, Sylar, Matt Parkman
Pairings: Peter/Sylar
Fandoms: Heroes
Summary: Zach offers to rescue Peter from drunk!Milo and bring him home, only to encounter Sylar, who locks him unconscious in a bathroom until police cart him away to a maximum security jail.
Title: Quintology 5 (10,349 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl5.doc
Characters: ZQ, Sylar, Spock, Smudge (<3), Noah Quinto, Milo, Peter, HRG, Claire, Matt, Mohinder, Molly Walker, Hiro, Sandra Bennet, Mr. Muggles, Misc Trek characters
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, Off-Centre (because Smudge is awesome and there needs to be more fic about him and his bisexual guinea pig.)
Pairings: Zach/Sylar, Peter/Zach, Peter/Sylar, Claire/Smudge, Mr. Muggles/Noah Quinto
Warnings: Dogslash.
Summary: Existential dilemmas, Mohinder singing, Molly getting scarred for life, and other forms of pure epicness that no summary can do justice to.
Title: Quintology 6: The One with the Dogs (4,997 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl6.doc
Characters/Pairings: ZQ, Sylar, Smudge, Peter, Claire, Mr. Muggles, Noah Quinto, Misc Keanu characters
Fandoms: Heroes, Off-Centre, misc Keanu films
Pairings: Claire/Smudge, dog threesome, Peter/Sylar, Zach/Sylar
Warnings: Dogslash.
Summary: When Jack the dog escapes, Alex and Keanu trace him to Zach's house where they find a bunch of dogs obliviously engaged in a threesome as other chaos occurs around them. Peter and Sylar yell at each other. Peter leaves, Sylar is depressed, and Zach ignores his better judgement and makes him waffles.
Title: Milo and the Keanu-Autographed Script (1,115 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtlmilo.doc
Characters: ZQ, Sylar, Smudge, Milo, Claire, Peter, Mr. Muggles, Keanu
Fandoms: Heroes, Off-Centre
Pairings: Claire/Smudge
Summary: Keanu Reeves signs Zach's copy of the Heroes script for Milo. Zach demands it back, but Milo refuses.
Title: Quintology 7 (1,881 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl7.doc
Characters: ZQ, Sylar, Smudge, Peter, Claire, Mr. Muggles, Misc Matrix characters
Pairings: Claire/Smudge
Summary: Mr. Muggles escapes from Zach while Smudge and Claire are fast asleep; Claire panics; Zach and Smudge yell at each other a lot, and then Sylar appears to make things worse.
If you're only going to read one, read 5. It's the best and actually has a plot. Or 4, which is shorter and still good.
For all:
Rating: PG
Spoiler alert: Seasons 1-3
Warnings: None, unless specified below. All slash is non-graphic and consists largely of awkward silences. How graphic anything is depends solely on your imagination, so if you're really imaginative, it's an R, if not, it's G.
Title: Quintology (2,748 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl1.doc
Characters: Sylar, Spock, Zachary Quinto, misc Keanu characters, Peter, Future!Peter, Heroes Writers, Tim Kring, The Oracle, Milo Ventimiglia, ZQ Fangirls, Greg Grunberg, Half of Heroes Crew, Other Half of Heroes Crew, Awkward Silence
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, Misc Keanu films
Summary: Spock gives Sylar a totally uncalled for nerve-pinch. Sylar is pissed off and decides to kill him - and anyone else in the way - as revenge, when he figures that it would be a better idea to impersonate Zachary Quinto and wreck havoc on the Heroes set.
Title: Quintology 2 (370 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl2.doc
Characters: Sylar, Spock, ZQ, Greg Grunberg, Twitter Followers, Sylar Fangirls, Peter, Milo, Heroes writers, Keanu, Neo
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, The Matrix
Summary: In which Sylar is finally temporarily defeated by fangirls from Twitter
Title: Quintology 3: The Chess Game (823 words) http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtlchessgame.doc
Characters: Sylar, Spock, Constantine, Neo, Keanu
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, The Matrix, Constantine
Summary: Chess game. Sylar vs. Constantine.
Title: In Which Milo Ventimiglia Ends Up on the Neb (1,686 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl3.doc
Characters: Milo, Peter, Misc. Matrix characters
Pairings: Inefficient drunk!Milo/Peter in which nothing much happens
Fandoms: Heroes, The Matrix
Summary: While getting drunk in a bar with a less-drunk Peter, Milo encounters Carrie-Anne Moss and freaks out. She decides that the only way to get rid of him is to let him meet Neo and Trinity.
Title: Quintology 4 (4109 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl4.doc
Characters: ZQ, Milo, Peter, Sylar, Matt Parkman
Pairings: Peter/Sylar
Fandoms: Heroes
Summary: Zach offers to rescue Peter from drunk!Milo and bring him home, only to encounter Sylar, who locks him unconscious in a bathroom until police cart him away to a maximum security jail.
Title: Quintology 5 (10,349 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl5.doc
Characters: ZQ, Sylar, Spock, Smudge (<3), Noah Quinto, Milo, Peter, HRG, Claire, Matt, Mohinder, Molly Walker, Hiro, Sandra Bennet, Mr. Muggles, Misc Trek characters
Fandoms: Heroes, Trek '09, Off-Centre (because Smudge is awesome and there needs to be more fic about him and his bisexual guinea pig.)
Pairings: Zach/Sylar, Peter/Zach, Peter/Sylar, Claire/Smudge, Mr. Muggles/Noah Quinto
Warnings: Dogslash.
Summary: Existential dilemmas, Mohinder singing, Molly getting scarred for life, and other forms of pure epicness that no summary can do justice to.
Title: Quintology 6: The One with the Dogs (4,997 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl6.doc
Characters/Pairings: ZQ, Sylar, Smudge, Peter, Claire, Mr. Muggles, Noah Quinto, Misc Keanu characters
Fandoms: Heroes, Off-Centre, misc Keanu films
Pairings: Claire/Smudge, dog threesome, Peter/Sylar, Zach/Sylar
Warnings: Dogslash.
Summary: When Jack the dog escapes, Alex and Keanu trace him to Zach's house where they find a bunch of dogs obliviously engaged in a threesome as other chaos occurs around them. Peter and Sylar yell at each other. Peter leaves, Sylar is depressed, and Zach ignores his better judgement and makes him waffles.
Title: Milo and the Keanu-Autographed Script (1,115 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtlmilo.doc
Characters: ZQ, Sylar, Smudge, Milo, Claire, Peter, Mr. Muggles, Keanu
Fandoms: Heroes, Off-Centre
Pairings: Claire/Smudge
Summary: Keanu Reeves signs Zach's copy of the Heroes script for Milo. Zach demands it back, but Milo refuses.
Title: Quintology 7 (1,881 words)
http://www.whoaisnotme.net/others/fics/qtl7.doc
Characters: ZQ, Sylar, Smudge, Peter, Claire, Mr. Muggles, Misc Matrix characters
Pairings: Claire/Smudge
Summary: Mr. Muggles escapes from Zach while Smudge and Claire are fast asleep; Claire panics; Zach and Smudge yell at each other a lot, and then Sylar appears to make things worse.