"And for the faithless, not the true believer, this song's for you"
I saw Mr. Carver on my way to the library this morning; he asked me if I was looking for a place on my own and I said I wasn't eager to move again anytime soon, that I got along with my roommates, and he interrupted and said he hadn't realized I'd moved in to an apartment. Oops.
Usually I'm visiting MML on a Saturday, so I'm lucky if I see Marcia. Today was a Friday, however, so I saw Michele, Mary K., Margot, Shelby, Harriet, and Jane. And Terry, of course.
He walked me down to Perks (where I was meeting Jonah for lunch) and bought me a hot chocolate. Jonah said we were cute together. ::smiles::
Lunch didn't last as long as I'd expected, so I went back to the library to hang out with Terry some more.
When I was working on my previous post, I was thinking about what I would say as Affirmations for people who don't read this, and I was thinking that one of my favorite things about Terry is that I can ask him anything and he'll answer me, and be very matter-of-fact about it, and I don't feel awkward in the asking.
I was thinking about how much I value honesty and wondering if that's part of the appeal of people like Eric -- their bluntness even when obnoxious is a form of honesty (and openness), which I so value. Of course, saying obnoxious shit one doesn't really believe grates on me.
Eric once complained that all we do (in human interactions) is tell each other stories, and while I could argue that statement (though one could argue that any discourse is a form of story-telling), my primary reaction was to not see this as a bad thing at all.
I'm sure a part of this is that I'm so nosy and also so into telling people about myself, but isn't learning each other's stories so core? Last week's Ulysses chapter included the Nausicaa chapter, and a good chunk of class was spent on the parallels in it to other lit (ways to make me happy), so now I have The Odyssey in my head and want to say something here about the tradition of inviting strangers into one's home and asking them to share their stories, but Homeric-type lit isn't my strongest subject.
I was looking up the full Evelyn Torton Beck quote I have in my LJ Profile that I'd been trying to quote from memory to Jonah ("Why is the possibility of 'passing' so insistently viewed as a great privilege [...] and not understood as a terrible degradation and denial?"), and on the preceding page she writes, "In order to feel fully safe I need to feel known." I think I may edit the quotation in my UserInfo to include that bit (though of course it's complicated; and in thinking further, part of the safety of my relationship with some of my close friends is knowing that they love and accept me without having to know all the details of my life/history/etc.).
***
I have some memory of winning an argument last time, but I definitely won the argument this time. This actually makes me sad, because if you believe something is "not okay" then why do it?
I really dislike the "men can't help themselves" defense -- primarily because it's so insulting to men, though of course it's also problematic in placing all the responsibility on women.
So we were having this conversation and I didn't have a dataset on hand but obviously I thought of LJ. Poll answers viewable only to me. I'm not screening comments, but anon commenting is on (as always) if you want to utilize that.
Poll on the power of sex
Terry rejected my "It depends" answer, hence it is denied to you for the purposes of this poll. I know I'm also being unfair in making you pick a gender binary identification; just work with me here. (Or leave a comment instead of a poll answer if you must.)
Usually I'm visiting MML on a Saturday, so I'm lucky if I see Marcia. Today was a Friday, however, so I saw Michele, Mary K., Margot, Shelby, Harriet, and Jane. And Terry, of course.
He walked me down to Perks (where I was meeting Jonah for lunch) and bought me a hot chocolate. Jonah said we were cute together. ::smiles::
Lunch didn't last as long as I'd expected, so I went back to the library to hang out with Terry some more.
When I was working on my previous post, I was thinking about what I would say as Affirmations for people who don't read this, and I was thinking that one of my favorite things about Terry is that I can ask him anything and he'll answer me, and be very matter-of-fact about it, and I don't feel awkward in the asking.
I was thinking about how much I value honesty and wondering if that's part of the appeal of people like Eric -- their bluntness even when obnoxious is a form of honesty (and openness), which I so value. Of course, saying obnoxious shit one doesn't really believe grates on me.
Eric once complained that all we do (in human interactions) is tell each other stories, and while I could argue that statement (though one could argue that any discourse is a form of story-telling), my primary reaction was to not see this as a bad thing at all.
I'm sure a part of this is that I'm so nosy and also so into telling people about myself, but isn't learning each other's stories so core? Last week's Ulysses chapter included the Nausicaa chapter, and a good chunk of class was spent on the parallels in it to other lit (ways to make me happy), so now I have The Odyssey in my head and want to say something here about the tradition of inviting strangers into one's home and asking them to share their stories, but Homeric-type lit isn't my strongest subject.
I was looking up the full Evelyn Torton Beck quote I have in my LJ Profile that I'd been trying to quote from memory to Jonah ("Why is the possibility of 'passing' so insistently viewed as a great privilege [...] and not understood as a terrible degradation and denial?"), and on the preceding page she writes, "In order to feel fully safe I need to feel known." I think I may edit the quotation in my UserInfo to include that bit (though of course it's complicated; and in thinking further, part of the safety of my relationship with some of my close friends is knowing that they love and accept me without having to know all the details of my life/history/etc.).
***
I have some memory of winning an argument last time, but I definitely won the argument this time. This actually makes me sad, because if you believe something is "not okay" then why do it?
I really dislike the "men can't help themselves" defense -- primarily because it's so insulting to men, though of course it's also problematic in placing all the responsibility on women.
So we were having this conversation and I didn't have a dataset on hand but obviously I thought of LJ. Poll answers viewable only to me. I'm not screening comments, but anon commenting is on (as always) if you want to utilize that.
Poll on the power of sex
Terry rejected my "It depends" answer, hence it is denied to you for the purposes of this poll. I know I'm also being unfair in making you pick a gender binary identification; just work with me here. (Or leave a comment instead of a poll answer if you must.)