Unemployment, even when there is no immediate financial crisis, can be likened to the desert experience. The usual ways in which we define ourselves are gone: we feel left without a place or a meaningful task. Everything that structures our time when we are employed abandons us. As we deal with unemployment, we find ourselves thinking about the meaning that waiting and trust have for us. If unemployment persists, we may find ourselves frantically grabbing at all possible hints and connections. We feel a desperate need to do something; yet when opportunity finally strikes, it may seem unrelated to all that we have done. We try to make sense of the many wrong moves that we make. But once we make the right move, what emerges feels like a gift.
-Carol Ochs, Our Lives as Torah: finding God in our own stories
Word, yo.
So, rain has been predicted for the past like 2 weeks and hasn't done much more than spit. The day i have to be in Boston all day? Of course the bad rain starts. And cold rain is rather miserable (though i like both cold and rain separately), plus wind so bad that i hold my umbrella right in front of my face (and then give up because i can't see anything that way). I was freaking out because i ended up 5 minutes late to my interview, but as it turned out to be fine as i was given a long application to fill out and then waited for Marc and then had the interview. I'm a big fan of Marc. And i'm one of 3 candidates for the job, and he said it's up to the client (he's a recruiter) and in this business you can't take it personally and that he likes me -- "If I didn't like you, we wouldn't still be talking. It woulda been 10 minutes, 'Thanks for coming by, lock the door behind her" -- and that, if it's okay with me, if i didn't get this job he'd still let me know if he sees other jobs he thinks would be a good match for me. At the end, he asked what the best way to contact me was -- phone or e-mail -- and we laughed over the fact that that was the only question in the whole interview that i stumbled over.
Walking back to South Station i avoided the MassPIRG people and did get hit up by the
Plan USA people, but i really liked the guy who talked to me and actually felt good about giving them money.
North Station continues to not be my friend, because the subway part is a wholly separate structure from the commuter rail part, so it's a good thing i knew where i was going. The rain let up for my time in Salem, though, and i sat in the lounge at Palmer and read until my class. Joyce (the instructor) was a lot easier to handle than she was during the orientation, and it was nice to realize that a lot of the hippie-dippie-ness is grounded in practical concerns. And i think i'm gonna learn a lot about how to actually do my job as a massage therapist, which i'm pleased about. Get to do more sinking money into this endeavour as i have to invest in supplies. Dude, i feel so official; i'm buying a table. (You can't practice without one because the body mechanics are all wrong if you try to do it on a regular bed or something and you'll hurt yourself. And if you decide you don't wanna do this, there'll be a new crop of students next semester and you can resell your table in a snap.)
EarthLite or
OakWorks, feel free to kill time selecting a table for me :)
On Monday, after i set up the Williams Lea interview, Venturi called and i set up a Thursday interview. While i was out Tuesday, 3 more places called me back. I now have two interviews on Friday (i decided i wasn't really interested in being a Bank of America teller and thus don't need to call them back). Also, Kaplan e-mailed me back to set up a phone interview so i can do tutoring for them (though trying to work out the timing is a bitch) and i apparently qualify for Harvard's $25/80min cog sci thing. I am feeling so much more confident about my ability to actually find a job now, like i can do this. [Edit: Though i just got called to set up an interview with a staffing firm, and selling myself still makes me nervous. But it'll be okay.] (And for those keeping track, next week is when i am, as Kate put it, "being trained for the legal distribution of alcoholic beverages".)
I need to not look at craiglist housing until i actually have a paycheck.
woe (and also
woe)
Remember when i thought a chunk of my CD collection had vanished? As i was doing some more unpacking/reorganizing Tuesday night, i realized that a box i had thought was empty in fact contained those very CDs. I win at life! Except of course for the part where i was an idiot and didn't realize they were in there until now.
In other news, 'tis a good time to be a kissage voyeur (
Ewan/Hayden and the
indie porn) and
Toyfare classifieds = amusing. Thanks to
antheia for all those links.
I walk with my head held high and naked in the sun
Claiming these streets for myself, again
I am the unchanging narrative, I don't resolve neatly
And I am the unchained melody, the current of the need to survive
-Jonatha Brooke, "Paris"
Since i keep doing the "Tell me why you love me" memes, it seems only fair to do a counterpart one.
Reply to this post and I'll tell you something I adore about you.
As always, doing the meme in your own journal should be optional. And i reserve the right to say something nice but not adoring.