(no subject)
the show was night was awesome. me and lani went with josh and his gf, melissa. they are so cool. mars volta was good. but a perfect circle was wayyy better.
today was lame. i cried when mike said that he couldnt hang out today. i got my hairs cut though. ive got bangs now. ill post when i want. right now, i dont want.
today i realized what a fucking loser i am at school. people are such fucking assholes. i love it when people talk to you at one moment but then forget you when other people are around. so i may not be the most "popular" girl at art school....its still fucking fucked up. although i kind of enjoy the aloneness, its still pathetic. i love people watching there. its so amusing. i like people knowing nothing about me. i prefer it that way. i only let certain people really know who i am. as so does probably everyone else. but i dont know....im in a bad mood. i wish i had someone to hold. i wish someone would hold me. i wish i werent so fucking stupid sometimes as well. i fucking hate myself at times. like right now, im bitching like a little girl. i dont know why i care? this is my journal, my fucking thoughts. but then again, im on here so people can read my thoughts and give me thier opinions on what i think. on how i feel. its fucked up. and im just acting like a little bitch right now. so congrats to anyone who read the whole thing. please stop here. i know i wouldnt read all this boring shit. noone ACTUALLY gives a fuck about how i feel. they may say they do but when in reality its a bunch of bullshit. i think ive been fucked over too much for my age. noone actually knows. except for me, so nooone will even care. i dont know......im done.
finally.
today was lame. i cried when mike said that he couldnt hang out today. i got my hairs cut though. ive got bangs now. ill post when i want. right now, i dont want.
today i realized what a fucking loser i am at school. people are such fucking assholes. i love it when people talk to you at one moment but then forget you when other people are around. so i may not be the most "popular" girl at art school....its still fucking fucked up. although i kind of enjoy the aloneness, its still pathetic. i love people watching there. its so amusing. i like people knowing nothing about me. i prefer it that way. i only let certain people really know who i am. as so does probably everyone else. but i dont know....im in a bad mood. i wish i had someone to hold. i wish someone would hold me. i wish i werent so fucking stupid sometimes as well. i fucking hate myself at times. like right now, im bitching like a little girl. i dont know why i care? this is my journal, my fucking thoughts. but then again, im on here so people can read my thoughts and give me thier opinions on what i think. on how i feel. its fucked up. and im just acting like a little bitch right now. so congrats to anyone who read the whole thing. please stop here. i know i wouldnt read all this boring shit. noone ACTUALLY gives a fuck about how i feel. they may say they do but when in reality its a bunch of bullshit. i think ive been fucked over too much for my age. noone actually knows. except for me, so nooone will even care. i dont know......im done.
finally.