Life on Mars (4/5)
Fic Title: Life on Mars
Author name: herminekurotowa
Artist name: thruterryseyes
Beta: jj1564
Alpha: junkerin
Genre: RPF, pre-relationship
Pairings: Jared/Jensen, Jared/OMCs, Jared/Jeffrey
Word count: 20,000
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: hurt!Jared, hurt!Jensen, institutionalised prostitution, underage prostitution, A/B/O dynamics, no knotting, mention of and implied non-con, non-consensual drugging, mention of mpreg. I can't think of more warnings, so just assume everything's implied somehow.
Summary: Jared would never have thought it was possible to find a soul mate in a state-owned brothel, but when he does, it will turn everyone's world upside down. But it's common knowledge that soul mates happen for a reason.
Chapter 4
Again, Jensen feels weird - the bad kind of weird.
Ruth is holding a thermometer in her small hands, looks at it. “You only have a temperature,” she says.
“But I feel like I'm burning up,” Jensen says shivering with cold.
Putting the device away, Ruth takes his face in her hands, cups his cheeks. She tilts it here and there, scrutinizes his eyes.
A small, wistful smile steals onto her lips. “The hints are unmistakable, honey. You've found your soul mate.”
Jensen is sitting in the chair in the infirmary's archive with his mouth agape. The omega.
“But... That's impossible,” he stammers. “I'd know if I... I mean there are signs...”
“Oh poor honey, did you read those bad Harlequin novels too?” Ruth's smile is morphing into a smug grin, which makes her look like a red-headed imp. “There's no lightning involved when you meet your soul mate, rest assured.”
“I know that, Ruthie, I'm not stupid!”
His friend's impish look makes him reconsider.
“I mean, I should have sensed him, felt him in my bones.”
Ruth tilts her head. “You said you didn't feel good lately.”
Everything slots together, all the pieces into their places. “Oh Alpha, it's because Jared was hurt.”
Quite surprised, Ruth sits back on the edge of the desk. “You mean poor Jared that I had to look into, don't you?”
Jensen nods, then asks somewhat perplexed, “What do you mean, 'poor Jared'?”
“Jensen, honey, the boy has been here for nine years. His own records start just after his fifteenth birthday, but there are indications in other servers' records that clearly say he came here shortly after his tenth birthday.”
“Jared already said it, but I thought he was messing up dates because he was roofied. It's plain impossible,” Jensen says shaking his head.
“I can show you. It's obvious that someone didn't want anybody to know about it, but all the same it's obvious that someone hid information between the entries. You'd never known if you'd never looked into it.”
Standing up, Jensen starts pacing the room; there is too much energy in his body to keep still.
Drawing a hand over his face and neck, he says, “Holy crap, Morgan must know about this. He was director at the very time, he just has to know about it.”
He turns to his friend. “That's why he's here. I mentioned the medical records on the phone a couple of days ago, and here he is!”
Suddenly, his legs are too weak to carry him, so he collapses into the chair. “This is big, Ruthie. This is too big. I'm at a loss what to do. What am I to do?”
Ruth pulls the other chair over in order to sit opposite to Jensen.
“Alright,” she says. “So Senator Morgan is the one who maybe brought Jared here when he was still a little boy. In any case, he knew about him since he was the Institute's director at the time and maintained silence about the matter. We'll keep it a secret for the time being. Morgan is too dangerous a man to make him an enemy.”
“You think he'll... take drastic action?”
“Morgan? No. But this acolyte of his... I think his soul is as black as his face.”
Jensen never thought of Morgan as dangerous.
He always paid attention to not offend the senator since he didn't want to put his career on the line, and Wisdom never behaved as crazy as this Tigerman guy, who writes letters to the senator every week, so how was Jensen supposed to know that he was walking on thin ice when working with both of them?
If you don't want to commit political or social suicide, Washington A.C. is anything but a dangerous city.
“Alright,” he agrees finally, “we're going to keep a low profile. And then?”
“I'll call Rob. You know, the HR manager at the hospital. His father-in-law is a judge; I'll just ask him a hypothetical question and then we'll see what he says. What do you think?”
“Won't he become suspicious?”
“Naaaw! I always ask him hypothetical questions about the books I read. You know, like, what if these situations were real, would the guys end up in jail?”
Jensen is doubtful about the strategy; at least though, it will buy him a couple of days. Reluctantly, he nods.
“Great!” Ruth decides cheerfully, patting on Jensen's knee. “Now that it's settled, let's have something to eat. I'm starving.”
“Yeah, I think you earned some coffee. Maybe a muffin?”
“You have muffins?”
“I'm pretty sure there are some left.”
Locking the archive's door, they head to the dining hall.
Jensen still can't wrap his head around the fact that Morgan - well-respected Senator Morgan - has a skeleton in his closet. And who knows what else.
Half his mind is occupied with the fact that his mentor and sponsor is involved in devious schemes - the other half though has to deal with the fact that there is a soul mate for Jensen, and it is a convicted public server named Jared, who may be not as criminal as it seems.
And just then, he sees Jared standing at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at them. As soon as he notices Jensen and Ruth, he starts moving upstairs.
Something about his posture is off, Jensen thinks, but he can't put a finger on it, and while a delighted smile is blossoming on his lips, Ruth shrieks.
The stars, existing by night and non-existing by day, in the same rhythm like breathing in and out, only so much slower, and maybe it is the universe breathing - the stars are the only constant things in his life. He can see them hiding inside the sun's light that is the brightest one of them all, but oh! so jealous of other luminaries.
He knows what to do and even if he'll regret it later, it needs to be done - he needs to do it. There is no way around, just straight ahead into the light of the fires.
“Jared,” the fires say.
If his important duty - his single purpose - wouldn't preoccupy his mind, he would ponder over this word's meaning. But since his single-mindedness doesn't allow other thoughts than Find and Kill, he doesn't even register that he is spoken to.
The fires are different in size and shape, but burning still the same. He too is burning, he can see it whenever he looks at his hand, glowing vivid and bright. The object he is holding is cool; he forgot its name, but it is cool and sharp, and he has to hide it from the fires.
There are so many of them, he can't find the one he is searching for.
“What the bloody hell are you doing?” one of them says. He ignores it because he found the other one, the dark light that oozes eclipse into the sky.
He is drawing nearer, fearlessly facing the darkness and the scent of cinnamon.
The fire next to it is making a high pitched noise, but it is the smell that is confounding him. Why should he kill something smelling of home?
Then there is a scuffle, another fire, the knife cutting through flesh and Jared blinks his eyes open, looking down at red on his hands.
“He won't make it.”
Ruth is upset; yet she needs to check on Jensen's wound. It is only a shallow cut on his arm that nurse Huffman already cleaned and wrapped up, but his friend has to see for herself. She is prodding and poking and re-wrapping Jensen's arm, all the time talking about poor Doctor Sheppard, who hasn't been as lucky as Jensen, and Jared, who has caused all this excitement.
“Do you think I can see him now?”
“Yes, but Senator Morgan wants to see him too.”
“He can't,” Jensen replies, “it's my last chance to get the truth out of him. You have to stall the senator.”
“Of course, honey.”
Standing up, Jensen wants to leave the room, but Ruth stops him by taking his hand.
“'He tried to kill you,” she says, her eyes big and dark with sadness, “you know that, don't you?”
“No, he didn't. I know for sure he didn't want to kill me. Yes, he tried, but he didn't want to.”
She keeps on looking at him, not impish, but sad this time.
“Ruth,” he sighs. “Jared was kind of drugged, you saw it for yourself. If he'd been in control of himself, he'd never done it. He's my soul mate.”
“Being a soul mate doesn't mean that he likes or even loves you, honey. You know that it takes time for the bond to settle. In the meantime, everything is possible.”
“I know,” Jensen replies unhappily, “but he didn't want to.”
The man in the hospital bed looks pale and small. He is surrounded by beeping machines that make him look even smaller.
Jensen takes a seat in the chair next to the bed. He is overwhelmed by the occurrences of the last hours, but there is no time to rest now.
“Doctor Sheppard,” he says in a low voice.
The man in the bed turns his head. Looking at him, his lips distort into a pained smile.
“Director Ackles,” the doctor says.
“Please call me Jensen. You saved my life, Mark, there's no need to cling to phrases of civility.”
Sheppard sighs, a low, strained noise. “Yes... I saved your life... the only decent thing I did in years and look what it got me.”
He lifts his hand; Jensen grabs it, paying attention to the IV lines.
“Jensen, I don't have much time left so you need to listen closely.” Another strained sigh. “There's a safe in my office hidden under the filing cabinet. The number is my wife's birthday backwards. Everything's in there, all the files and data that prove what Morgan did, still does. You need to get it before he does. Promise you'll do the right thing and bring the fucker down.”
Jensen is stunned. “I...”
“You'll see. When you see what he did, you'll know what to do. You're a better man than I am.”
Closing his eyes, Sheppard keeps on talking.
“I never wanted to be the bad one in the story. I tried to do a good job, help the hosts in the Institute, and I think, at the beginning, I was a decent doctor. Then, nine years and four months ago, Morgan brought a tiny, scrawny boy to me, said he was an orphan and bribed me into taking him in and forging his records. When I found the reason for his actions, I wanted to get out, but he threatened my family. I was too entangled in his machinations and scared what may happen. So I kept my mouth shut.”
“But you made those entries in other servers' records, didn't you?”
“Yes. It was the only way to get someone onto his tracks without putting my family at risk.” Now looking straight into Jensen's eyes, Sheppard continues urgently, “You need to get Jared off those 'vitamins' and 'contraceptives'; it's not too late yet, but if he keeps on taking them, they'll kill him.
“Jensen, he's not an omega, he's an alpha, and the drugs are suppressing his bodily development; they prevent him from becoming the man he's supposed to be.”
Jensen is stunned. “Wh-what? I don't under-?”
“He's an alpha, I swear he is. Look him up; if you Google him, you'll find him.”
“I already did, I can't find a Jared Paladecki on the interweb.”
“Padalecki,” Sheppard breathes. “His name is Padalecki.”
He closes his eyes and falls asleep, his breathing evening out.
Jensen is sitting next to him and says “Thank you,” when it is too late for the doctor to hear.
A knock at the door startles him. Nurse Huffman sticks her head in the door, announces that Sheppard's family have arrived.
Jensen has to talk with them, a beautiful blonde beta and two teenage boys, apparently both alphas. He offers assistance and his condolences, resorts to phrases since he feels the whole time like he is underwater. The world feels odd, but he has to function anyway for appearances' sake.
After escaping the tears, desperation and sadness, he needs to see Jared. He is longing for his smile, the scent of his hair and the feel of his skin. He wants to be close to the other man, as close and as long as possible.
It is weird that he can't determine whether his feelings changed since he learned the truth about the boy he thought to be an omega. They definitely didn't change because of the attempt on his life since Jared clearly was under the influence of some kind of drugs.
The question is, who is the mastermind behind it? Is it truly Senator Morgan? Did he try to conceal his trail? Or was it a completely different person with unknown reasons?
Jensen rubs his hands over his face; he can feel a headache coming.
At this very moment, he happens to glance out of the window looking over the backyard and there, in the corner, is Jared kneeling on the floor.
Jared doesn't want to wake up.
He can't remember what happened before the world tilted and went blank, but there was blood involved for sure.
“What did you do, you stupid fucker?” a voice says laced with tears.
Jared pries his eyes open. The world stays black though.
He is in the familiar solitary cell with nothing in it save for the sound of his ragged breathing and some scratching on the far side of the door. Maybe he'll find the spoon soon.
“Os, is that you?” Jared asks.
“Of course it's me, idiot.” Osric sounds exasperated. “The institute is thrumming with rumors. So, what did you do?”
Yeah, what did he do? He remembers lights and blood, but surely there is more to it
Jensen.
Jensen- the director was there. The doctor too, but he can't remember more.
“I don't-”
“I need to go,” Osric interrupts.
He can hear feet shuffling and after a short silence, there are noises of people on the other side of the door. Keys clink, metal croaks; the door opens.
Jared can't see the man standing in the sliver of light clearly, his eyes blinking in the brightness, but he knows the voice even after years.
“Jared, Jared,” the man says, “I'd never thought you to be so aggressive. It saddens me to meet you again under such devastating circumstances.”
Jared shrinks back. His eyes are blown wide with fear; his heart yearns for the man's touch - a hug, a pat on the shoulder - and at the same time, he never wants to feel the touch of those hands on his skin again.
Never ever again.
“I think you know,” Morgan continues, “that hurting a member of the management is punished severely, all the more, considering you tried to assassinate the director.”
The director? Jensen? Jared would never hurt him; it would mean to lose home. And what does the former director mean, assassinate?
“And even worse, you succeeded in killing poor Doctor Sheppard.”
What? No! That is impossible, Jared would recall things like that...
Wouldn't he?
“No,” he says shaking his head. “No, I'd never... I couldn't...”
“It's okay,” Morgan soothes. “Since you didn't finish the one task you were supposed to do, it's my turn now to make sure you and Ackles won't have a chance to chat together.”
Morgan's figure seems to grow; it is a weird thing that happens whenever he uses his power as Alpha's Proxy, when he acts as a cleric, not a statesman. As a little boy, it freaked Jared out that his surrogate father was able to grow in size and impact, and then later that he used this ability to coerce Jared into things - mostly sex related - he didn't want to do when Morgan's powers of persuasion didn't work.
“I'm sorry I have to do this.” Morgan's voice sounds anything but sorry. “I really am. I always wanted to keep you safe, that's why you're here. To keep you safe.”
Why does he point out Jared's safety? Jared never felt safe in the Institute; he was bullied and hurt and abused, and life was literally hell.
Then he remembers Sheppard's words. Though he usually was grumpy, he never was cruel to Jared; he taught him how to play chess and brought toys and treated his wounds. Was he keeping Jared safe? He certainly didn't rape him at the age of fourteen.
A second silhouette in the door yanks Jared back to reality. It is the Bogeyman, dark and looming, entering the cell, and Jared scrambles away even though there is nothing in the room to hide but darkness.
Morgan's voice is booming out all through the hallway and cell. “Take a good look. This is how the Alpha Above punishes sinners against his word!”
Jared doesn't know who he is talking to, he is too busy thrashing around and avoiding the Bogeyman's black hands - in vain though. A vise-like grip envelopes both his wrists, yanking him upward and out of the cell.
His friends are standing there - Osric, Matt, Katie; at least a dozen hosts and wardens. Jared can see shock and fear and the need to help him in some of their eyes; there is nothing they can do though. He is being hauled and pulled through the corridor and then upstairs, in the direction of the backyard, while Morgan's voice is echoing sententiously, reciting prayers and Book passages.
The sinner - that is him, even if he doesn't know what he is supposed to have done. He doesn't know what to expect until his overwhelmed brain picks up on the one word that is being repeated: castigation.
Jared's blood is running cold through his veins. The castigation Morgan is talking about has nothing to do with the castigation Jared knows from work. There won't be customized floggers and crops that only hurt like Hell, but don't break the skin - when used correctly. This castigation is a whipping - nothing more, nothing less - with a genuine whip.
And they won't stop whipping until Jared is dead.
Chapter 5
Author name: herminekurotowa
Artist name: thruterryseyes
Beta: jj1564
Alpha: junkerin
Genre: RPF, pre-relationship
Pairings: Jared/Jensen, Jared/OMCs, Jared/Jeffrey
Word count: 20,000
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: hurt!Jared, hurt!Jensen, institutionalised prostitution, underage prostitution, A/B/O dynamics, no knotting, mention of and implied non-con, non-consensual drugging, mention of mpreg. I can't think of more warnings, so just assume everything's implied somehow.
Summary: Jared would never have thought it was possible to find a soul mate in a state-owned brothel, but when he does, it will turn everyone's world upside down. But it's common knowledge that soul mates happen for a reason.
Chapter 4
Again, Jensen feels weird - the bad kind of weird.
Ruth is holding a thermometer in her small hands, looks at it. “You only have a temperature,” she says.
“But I feel like I'm burning up,” Jensen says shivering with cold.
Putting the device away, Ruth takes his face in her hands, cups his cheeks. She tilts it here and there, scrutinizes his eyes.
A small, wistful smile steals onto her lips. “The hints are unmistakable, honey. You've found your soul mate.”
Jensen is sitting in the chair in the infirmary's archive with his mouth agape. The omega.
“But... That's impossible,” he stammers. “I'd know if I... I mean there are signs...”
“Oh poor honey, did you read those bad Harlequin novels too?” Ruth's smile is morphing into a smug grin, which makes her look like a red-headed imp. “There's no lightning involved when you meet your soul mate, rest assured.”
“I know that, Ruthie, I'm not stupid!”
His friend's impish look makes him reconsider.
“I mean, I should have sensed him, felt him in my bones.”
Ruth tilts her head. “You said you didn't feel good lately.”
Everything slots together, all the pieces into their places. “Oh Alpha, it's because Jared was hurt.”
Quite surprised, Ruth sits back on the edge of the desk. “You mean poor Jared that I had to look into, don't you?”
Jensen nods, then asks somewhat perplexed, “What do you mean, 'poor Jared'?”
“Jensen, honey, the boy has been here for nine years. His own records start just after his fifteenth birthday, but there are indications in other servers' records that clearly say he came here shortly after his tenth birthday.”
“Jared already said it, but I thought he was messing up dates because he was roofied. It's plain impossible,” Jensen says shaking his head.
“I can show you. It's obvious that someone didn't want anybody to know about it, but all the same it's obvious that someone hid information between the entries. You'd never known if you'd never looked into it.”
Standing up, Jensen starts pacing the room; there is too much energy in his body to keep still.
Drawing a hand over his face and neck, he says, “Holy crap, Morgan must know about this. He was director at the very time, he just has to know about it.”
He turns to his friend. “That's why he's here. I mentioned the medical records on the phone a couple of days ago, and here he is!”
Suddenly, his legs are too weak to carry him, so he collapses into the chair. “This is big, Ruthie. This is too big. I'm at a loss what to do. What am I to do?”
Ruth pulls the other chair over in order to sit opposite to Jensen.
“Alright,” she says. “So Senator Morgan is the one who maybe brought Jared here when he was still a little boy. In any case, he knew about him since he was the Institute's director at the time and maintained silence about the matter. We'll keep it a secret for the time being. Morgan is too dangerous a man to make him an enemy.”
“You think he'll... take drastic action?”
“Morgan? No. But this acolyte of his... I think his soul is as black as his face.”
Jensen never thought of Morgan as dangerous.
He always paid attention to not offend the senator since he didn't want to put his career on the line, and Wisdom never behaved as crazy as this Tigerman guy, who writes letters to the senator every week, so how was Jensen supposed to know that he was walking on thin ice when working with both of them?
If you don't want to commit political or social suicide, Washington A.C. is anything but a dangerous city.
“Alright,” he agrees finally, “we're going to keep a low profile. And then?”
“I'll call Rob. You know, the HR manager at the hospital. His father-in-law is a judge; I'll just ask him a hypothetical question and then we'll see what he says. What do you think?”
“Won't he become suspicious?”
“Naaaw! I always ask him hypothetical questions about the books I read. You know, like, what if these situations were real, would the guys end up in jail?”
Jensen is doubtful about the strategy; at least though, it will buy him a couple of days. Reluctantly, he nods.
“Great!” Ruth decides cheerfully, patting on Jensen's knee. “Now that it's settled, let's have something to eat. I'm starving.”
“Yeah, I think you earned some coffee. Maybe a muffin?”
“You have muffins?”
“I'm pretty sure there are some left.”
Locking the archive's door, they head to the dining hall.
Jensen still can't wrap his head around the fact that Morgan - well-respected Senator Morgan - has a skeleton in his closet. And who knows what else.
Half his mind is occupied with the fact that his mentor and sponsor is involved in devious schemes - the other half though has to deal with the fact that there is a soul mate for Jensen, and it is a convicted public server named Jared, who may be not as criminal as it seems.
And just then, he sees Jared standing at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at them. As soon as he notices Jensen and Ruth, he starts moving upstairs.
Something about his posture is off, Jensen thinks, but he can't put a finger on it, and while a delighted smile is blossoming on his lips, Ruth shrieks.
The stars, existing by night and non-existing by day, in the same rhythm like breathing in and out, only so much slower, and maybe it is the universe breathing - the stars are the only constant things in his life. He can see them hiding inside the sun's light that is the brightest one of them all, but oh! so jealous of other luminaries.
He knows what to do and even if he'll regret it later, it needs to be done - he needs to do it. There is no way around, just straight ahead into the light of the fires.
“Jared,” the fires say.
If his important duty - his single purpose - wouldn't preoccupy his mind, he would ponder over this word's meaning. But since his single-mindedness doesn't allow other thoughts than Find and Kill, he doesn't even register that he is spoken to.
The fires are different in size and shape, but burning still the same. He too is burning, he can see it whenever he looks at his hand, glowing vivid and bright. The object he is holding is cool; he forgot its name, but it is cool and sharp, and he has to hide it from the fires.
There are so many of them, he can't find the one he is searching for.
“What the bloody hell are you doing?” one of them says. He ignores it because he found the other one, the dark light that oozes eclipse into the sky.
He is drawing nearer, fearlessly facing the darkness and the scent of cinnamon.
The fire next to it is making a high pitched noise, but it is the smell that is confounding him. Why should he kill something smelling of home?
Then there is a scuffle, another fire, the knife cutting through flesh and Jared blinks his eyes open, looking down at red on his hands.
“He won't make it.”
Ruth is upset; yet she needs to check on Jensen's wound. It is only a shallow cut on his arm that nurse Huffman already cleaned and wrapped up, but his friend has to see for herself. She is prodding and poking and re-wrapping Jensen's arm, all the time talking about poor Doctor Sheppard, who hasn't been as lucky as Jensen, and Jared, who has caused all this excitement.
“Do you think I can see him now?”
“Yes, but Senator Morgan wants to see him too.”
“He can't,” Jensen replies, “it's my last chance to get the truth out of him. You have to stall the senator.”
“Of course, honey.”
Standing up, Jensen wants to leave the room, but Ruth stops him by taking his hand.
“'He tried to kill you,” she says, her eyes big and dark with sadness, “you know that, don't you?”
“No, he didn't. I know for sure he didn't want to kill me. Yes, he tried, but he didn't want to.”
She keeps on looking at him, not impish, but sad this time.
“Ruth,” he sighs. “Jared was kind of drugged, you saw it for yourself. If he'd been in control of himself, he'd never done it. He's my soul mate.”
“Being a soul mate doesn't mean that he likes or even loves you, honey. You know that it takes time for the bond to settle. In the meantime, everything is possible.”
“I know,” Jensen replies unhappily, “but he didn't want to.”
The man in the hospital bed looks pale and small. He is surrounded by beeping machines that make him look even smaller.
Jensen takes a seat in the chair next to the bed. He is overwhelmed by the occurrences of the last hours, but there is no time to rest now.
“Doctor Sheppard,” he says in a low voice.
The man in the bed turns his head. Looking at him, his lips distort into a pained smile.
“Director Ackles,” the doctor says.
“Please call me Jensen. You saved my life, Mark, there's no need to cling to phrases of civility.”
Sheppard sighs, a low, strained noise. “Yes... I saved your life... the only decent thing I did in years and look what it got me.”
He lifts his hand; Jensen grabs it, paying attention to the IV lines.
“Jensen, I don't have much time left so you need to listen closely.” Another strained sigh. “There's a safe in my office hidden under the filing cabinet. The number is my wife's birthday backwards. Everything's in there, all the files and data that prove what Morgan did, still does. You need to get it before he does. Promise you'll do the right thing and bring the fucker down.”
Jensen is stunned. “I...”
“You'll see. When you see what he did, you'll know what to do. You're a better man than I am.”
Closing his eyes, Sheppard keeps on talking.
“I never wanted to be the bad one in the story. I tried to do a good job, help the hosts in the Institute, and I think, at the beginning, I was a decent doctor. Then, nine years and four months ago, Morgan brought a tiny, scrawny boy to me, said he was an orphan and bribed me into taking him in and forging his records. When I found the reason for his actions, I wanted to get out, but he threatened my family. I was too entangled in his machinations and scared what may happen. So I kept my mouth shut.”
“But you made those entries in other servers' records, didn't you?”
“Yes. It was the only way to get someone onto his tracks without putting my family at risk.” Now looking straight into Jensen's eyes, Sheppard continues urgently, “You need to get Jared off those 'vitamins' and 'contraceptives'; it's not too late yet, but if he keeps on taking them, they'll kill him.
“Jensen, he's not an omega, he's an alpha, and the drugs are suppressing his bodily development; they prevent him from becoming the man he's supposed to be.”
Jensen is stunned. “Wh-what? I don't under-?”
“He's an alpha, I swear he is. Look him up; if you Google him, you'll find him.”
“I already did, I can't find a Jared Paladecki on the interweb.”
“Padalecki,” Sheppard breathes. “His name is Padalecki.”
He closes his eyes and falls asleep, his breathing evening out.
Jensen is sitting next to him and says “Thank you,” when it is too late for the doctor to hear.
A knock at the door startles him. Nurse Huffman sticks her head in the door, announces that Sheppard's family have arrived.
Jensen has to talk with them, a beautiful blonde beta and two teenage boys, apparently both alphas. He offers assistance and his condolences, resorts to phrases since he feels the whole time like he is underwater. The world feels odd, but he has to function anyway for appearances' sake.
After escaping the tears, desperation and sadness, he needs to see Jared. He is longing for his smile, the scent of his hair and the feel of his skin. He wants to be close to the other man, as close and as long as possible.
It is weird that he can't determine whether his feelings changed since he learned the truth about the boy he thought to be an omega. They definitely didn't change because of the attempt on his life since Jared clearly was under the influence of some kind of drugs.
The question is, who is the mastermind behind it? Is it truly Senator Morgan? Did he try to conceal his trail? Or was it a completely different person with unknown reasons?
Jensen rubs his hands over his face; he can feel a headache coming.
At this very moment, he happens to glance out of the window looking over the backyard and there, in the corner, is Jared kneeling on the floor.
Jared doesn't want to wake up.
He can't remember what happened before the world tilted and went blank, but there was blood involved for sure.
“What did you do, you stupid fucker?” a voice says laced with tears.
Jared pries his eyes open. The world stays black though.
He is in the familiar solitary cell with nothing in it save for the sound of his ragged breathing and some scratching on the far side of the door. Maybe he'll find the spoon soon.
“Os, is that you?” Jared asks.
“Of course it's me, idiot.” Osric sounds exasperated. “The institute is thrumming with rumors. So, what did you do?”
Yeah, what did he do? He remembers lights and blood, but surely there is more to it
Jensen.
Jensen- the director was there. The doctor too, but he can't remember more.
“I don't-”
“I need to go,” Osric interrupts.
He can hear feet shuffling and after a short silence, there are noises of people on the other side of the door. Keys clink, metal croaks; the door opens.
Jared can't see the man standing in the sliver of light clearly, his eyes blinking in the brightness, but he knows the voice even after years.
“Jared, Jared,” the man says, “I'd never thought you to be so aggressive. It saddens me to meet you again under such devastating circumstances.”
Jared shrinks back. His eyes are blown wide with fear; his heart yearns for the man's touch - a hug, a pat on the shoulder - and at the same time, he never wants to feel the touch of those hands on his skin again.
Never ever again.
“I think you know,” Morgan continues, “that hurting a member of the management is punished severely, all the more, considering you tried to assassinate the director.”
The director? Jensen? Jared would never hurt him; it would mean to lose home. And what does the former director mean, assassinate?
“And even worse, you succeeded in killing poor Doctor Sheppard.”
What? No! That is impossible, Jared would recall things like that...
Wouldn't he?
“No,” he says shaking his head. “No, I'd never... I couldn't...”
“It's okay,” Morgan soothes. “Since you didn't finish the one task you were supposed to do, it's my turn now to make sure you and Ackles won't have a chance to chat together.”
Morgan's figure seems to grow; it is a weird thing that happens whenever he uses his power as Alpha's Proxy, when he acts as a cleric, not a statesman. As a little boy, it freaked Jared out that his surrogate father was able to grow in size and impact, and then later that he used this ability to coerce Jared into things - mostly sex related - he didn't want to do when Morgan's powers of persuasion didn't work.
“I'm sorry I have to do this.” Morgan's voice sounds anything but sorry. “I really am. I always wanted to keep you safe, that's why you're here. To keep you safe.”
Why does he point out Jared's safety? Jared never felt safe in the Institute; he was bullied and hurt and abused, and life was literally hell.
Then he remembers Sheppard's words. Though he usually was grumpy, he never was cruel to Jared; he taught him how to play chess and brought toys and treated his wounds. Was he keeping Jared safe? He certainly didn't rape him at the age of fourteen.
A second silhouette in the door yanks Jared back to reality. It is the Bogeyman, dark and looming, entering the cell, and Jared scrambles away even though there is nothing in the room to hide but darkness.
Morgan's voice is booming out all through the hallway and cell. “Take a good look. This is how the Alpha Above punishes sinners against his word!”
Jared doesn't know who he is talking to, he is too busy thrashing around and avoiding the Bogeyman's black hands - in vain though. A vise-like grip envelopes both his wrists, yanking him upward and out of the cell.
His friends are standing there - Osric, Matt, Katie; at least a dozen hosts and wardens. Jared can see shock and fear and the need to help him in some of their eyes; there is nothing they can do though. He is being hauled and pulled through the corridor and then upstairs, in the direction of the backyard, while Morgan's voice is echoing sententiously, reciting prayers and Book passages.
The sinner - that is him, even if he doesn't know what he is supposed to have done. He doesn't know what to expect until his overwhelmed brain picks up on the one word that is being repeated: castigation.
Jared's blood is running cold through his veins. The castigation Morgan is talking about has nothing to do with the castigation Jared knows from work. There won't be customized floggers and crops that only hurt like Hell, but don't break the skin - when used correctly. This castigation is a whipping - nothing more, nothing less - with a genuine whip.
And they won't stop whipping until Jared is dead.
Chapter 5