radix
Writer, poet, Arab, and all-around awesome person, tithenai, Amal El-Mohtar, has an amazing and heart-twisting post, Thoughts on Elizabeth Moon and the Wiscon ConCom's Response.
I found myself nodding along to her words. I know what she means when she writes about being grateful for forbearance, "[t]o be Makers of Points before we are people."
When you have to deal with Teachable Moments all the time, it wears on you. Forbearance, grit-toothed tolerance, starts to feel like something you should be grateful for, instead of feeling like what it is: the absolute minimum common denominator of decent behavior.
Over the years, particularly with respect to my family, I've moved from being grateful for forbearance, to impatience, to not-backing-the-fuck-down-because-damn-it-this-is-the-right-position-and-yes-it's-called-the-moral-high-ground-FOR-A-REASON.
Part of my personal growth has been difficult--conflicts with family are never pleasant or pretty. But I find it a testament to the values my family gave me that it grows harder and harder to keep quiet, when they--or anyone--is acting hurtfully.
I read Amal's words, and I recognize them, and it makes me angry. Because it's not right. Because we can do better. Because we have to do better.
I found myself nodding along to her words. I know what she means when she writes about being grateful for forbearance, "[t]o be Makers of Points before we are people."
When you have to deal with Teachable Moments all the time, it wears on you. Forbearance, grit-toothed tolerance, starts to feel like something you should be grateful for, instead of feeling like what it is: the absolute minimum common denominator of decent behavior.
Over the years, particularly with respect to my family, I've moved from being grateful for forbearance, to impatience, to not-backing-the-fuck-down-because-damn-it-this-is-the-right-position-and-yes-it's-called-the-moral-high-ground-FOR-A-REASON.
Part of my personal growth has been difficult--conflicts with family are never pleasant or pretty. But I find it a testament to the values my family gave me that it grows harder and harder to keep quiet, when they--or anyone--is acting hurtfully.
I read Amal's words, and I recognize them, and it makes me angry. Because it's not right. Because we can do better. Because we have to do better.