Ben & Annie forever
I know, I know, this is really long but I hope it's worth it. It's Ben and Annie on the day that Ben proposes to her.
I wanted to provide some back story so that the whole section after they get to the veranda had some context so that the feelings Ben and Annie feel had more depth.
This is the third part of my Ben Every Seven Years Trilogy. I'd written about him as a 12 year old and a 19 year old, so 26 seemed the next logical age. I did have to change one major detail: in the 19 year old Ben story I mentioned that they got married at 21, but I ignored that to provide the contrast between agreeing to help with The Purge in the morning and proposing to Annie that night; I've based Ben's age on the fact that he was born in 1963, details of how I know that being LOST fan geek stuff. The two years between Ben proposing to Annie and The Purge provide plenty of time for those crazy kids to get married, Annie to get pregnant and for her to *SIGH* die. *SOB*
I hope you find it romantic and I was happy to find a place for my alter-ego, gay boy Jonathan, in the story. Note: Annie's last name, Pallister, was taken from my favorite English soccer player, Gary Pallister, who played for Manchester United in the 1990's.
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In his 26 years of living, Benjamin Linus had only been this nervous once before. That happened 14 years previously when, after he had run away from the DHARMA Village and encountered the mysterious Hostile in the jungle, he begged the Hostile to take him back to his people. The short wait for an answer had been excruciating, 5 seconds seeming like 50,000. This was different, however, for today Ben was going to propose marriage to his beloved Annie Pallister.
The fourteen years since that encounter with the Hostile, whose name Ben found out was Richard, had been fascinating ones for Mr. Linus, if viewed from afar with a clinical eye. By asking Richard to take him in to the Hostiles embrace, Ben knew that he was turning his back on his people completely. At the back of his mind, Young Ben had known that might mean death for his people, who were embroiled in a war with the Island natives, whom they called The Hostiles. Apart from Annie, the one person he truly connected with, he was mostly unconcerned with that prospect; in any case, he was going to make sure Annie was safe before any potential nastiness came down. The one thing that kept him going was his amazing ability to wait, to be patient. People always remarked that Ben seemed so in control of his feelings, that he seemed to float above concerns that most people took for granted. Ben never understood those kinds of remarks, because inside he was always a maelstrom of feelings: bitter hatred towards his loutish, beer drinking Dad, who wounded Ben to his core when he snarled an accusation that Ben had killed his mother merely by being born. While this was technically true, what an appalling thing to say to a 12-year old boy! Scorn for the DHARMA Initiative, whose stated goals of doing research for the betterment of all mankind had curdled in to ethically dubious research in to mind control, manipulation of the genetic code of humans and animals and a smug, superior attitude towards the Island's native population. Contempt for most of his fellow DHARMA workers, who had neither the intellect or insight that Ben possessed in spades. Then there was Annie.
Annie had been the first person in his life to show Ben kindness without expecting anything in return. When she walked up to him not long after his arrival on The Island and ingratiated herself with the offer of an Apollo Bar, Ben melted inside. She was so beautiful! Her round cheeks, long straight brown hair, the gorgeous eyes, they had pierced Ben's heart in a way that he would have scarcely imagined, a defensive shell having been created by Young Ben to protect himself from the hurt and pain that seemed to rule his world. Annie was also very intelligent, and that appealed to Ben very much, he who spent so much of his time lost in books, devouring them for knowledge and hints of a better life than the one he was seemingly consigned to. Annie was one of those people for whom mathematics came easy; by the time she was 15, she had been teaching her teacher about complex concepts that few could even grasp. She was considered one of the bright hopes of the DHARMA Initiative, which placed so much emphasis on mathematics due to the accursed Numbers.
By the time Ben had turned 17, he was madly in love in Annie. She had blossomed in to a beautiful young woman, her earlier described attributes now complimented by beautiful round breasts, a curvaceous figure and, due to her interest in swimming, a toned, trim body. Seeing Annie had two affects on Ben: unbridled lust and a feeling of completeness, of her being who he was destined to spend his life with. Luckily for him, Annie felt the same way: as Ben had grown from the tall, gawky boy in to a handsome man, Annie couldn't believe that Fortune had brought Ben to The Island, so remote, so far removed from what was called "the real world". Almost upon their meeting, they became inseparable; they spent as much time together as they could. With Ben's Dad being lost in his own world of pain and beer, he'd grown up almost by himself. Annie, however, came from a close knit family, there being her parents and an older brother.
In the five years since Young Ben had met Richard, Benjamin Linus had lead a double life. It was agreed between them that they would meet once a year to discuss whether Ben was ready to join the Natives, as Ben called them. They settled on December 22nd, Ben's birthday, as people in The Village knew it was also the day his mother had died giving birth to him and they kept their distance. This made it easy for Ben to slip away, turn off the sonar fence and meet Richard in the same clearing as their first meeting without being followed, without arousing suspicion. In the fifth year of these meetings, Ben had been given the news that he had waited for: he would be able to join the Natives at an unspecified point in the future, but the price was going to be very, very steep: he would have to facilitate the Purge of all living DHARMA members, be the agent of their demise. Since Ben had thought this possibility over in his mind a thousand times, his answer was swift: he would do whatever it takes, but in return, he must be able to bring along two people: Annie and his friend Jonathan, who was a brilliant scientist in the making, working on genetics and gene therapy. Richard, after a long pause, agreed and disappeared in to the jungle, saying he would see Ben in one year's time.
Ben and Annie's relationship, so sweet, so pure, so innocent up until that point --they hadn't had sex yet-- nearly broke apart when 17-year old Ben stood up in the conference room on Pala and told the entire population of The Village that he was not going to pursue his scientific studies any more, that he was going to become a janitor like his Dad. The reason he did this, of course, was because people like his Dad were almost invisible to the higher ups in the Initiative, they were just worker drones, barely worthy of thought. This attitude would allow Ben the latitude he needed to help The Natives carry out their plan. But even Ben, so wise beyond his years, so perceptive about others feelings and thoughts, was surprised at the fury he unleashed with his announcement. For the next two years, he was hounded constantly to change his mind, badgered about his reasoning, almost shunned by his people for his decision. The announcement had an unintended side-affect that he hadn't anticipated: it strained his relationship with Annie. There were many tear-filled scenes as they hiked the beautiful valleys of The Island, Annie pleading with Ben to share his heart with her, to tell her why he was throwing away a brilliant scientific career so that he could haul beer to The Flame. As much as Ben loved her, he couldn't tell her the reason for his decision and that inability to confide in her, when before his heart had been hers to know, caused a rift, mostly unseen but still there, between them.
As he stood by the mirror grooming himself, Ben played the evening's events over in his head one last time, to make sure that he'd left nothing out. He had bribed one of the boatman who ran people back and forth from the Pala Ferry dock to the tiny island where animal research was happening to take him, Annie and Jonathan there just before sundown; the boatman risked consequences for deviating from the usual ferry schedule. Jonathan, devoted friend Jonathan, had agreed to play waiter/busboy for the evening Ben had planned. The two men had walked every inch of the Pala shore six months before, searching for a place where the sun set just right, where the sometimes fierce winds were blocked, where the ocean wasn't so turbulent. They had found it not far from the Hydra station and there they had spent their free time building a small veranda-like structure, little more than poles that held up a thatched roof. They built a table for two with comfortable chairs for use inside of it. They also built a small preparation area about twenty feet away, which would allow Jonathan to serve Ben and Annie's needs, but also keep his distance so they had privacy.
Ben picked December 22 as the date he would propose to Annie. He wanted to remove the memory of his mother's death from that day, replace it with something more joyous, so he and Jonathan had targeted that date for everything to be ready. Unfortunately for young Mr. Linus, his timing, usually so impeccable, was poor: at his annual meeting with Richard earlier that morning, he had been told what he longed to hear: the DHARMA Purge was to take place in two years time, on December 22, 1992, the day Ben turned 29. As Richard once again melted in to the jungle with his feline grace, Ben had a horrifying realization: he was going to propose to Annie that night and he had only two years to break her in to the idea of his taking part in The Purge. Annie's mother had died the previous year, but there was still her father and brother to account for. After the initial wave of terror flooded over him, Ben resolved to find a way around the issues that now presented themselves and to enjoy his evening with his beloved Annie.
Ben looked beautiful as he gathered up the food he and Jonathan had prepared, some DHARMA wine and other provisions. He was wearing a favorite shirt of Annie's, a long-sleeved dress shirt with light and dark gray stripes. Ben didn't like that the stripes accentuated his growing paunch, but this was Annie's night. He chose his very best dark navy slacks, dark gym socks, black hiking shoes and a nice belt to complete the ensemble. He spent a good ten minutes getting his hair just right and after he put on his gold, wire rimmed glasses and rolled up the sleeves of the shirt a bit, he pronounced himself ready. He took a deep breath, exhaled and went to pick up Annie; Jonathan would meet them at the Pala Ferry dock with his part of the provisions. He walked the four doors down to the Pallisters and gently knocked on the door. He had told Annie that he wanted to spend his birthday with her, that he had something special planned and could she shoo her family away before he arrived? She had done so with her usual tact and charm and when she opened the door, Ben almost burst in to tears, she was so beautiful. Her hair had a lustrous shine to it, her cheeks were rosy and the flowered sun frock with matching shawl made her worthy of a Renaissance master's painting. "Good evening, Annie" Ben said, still, after all these years, formal and polite. "Hi, Ben, come on in, everyone's gone". He nodded slightly and crossed the threshold of the house.
Annie closed the door and walked over to where Ben was standing. She took his picnic basket and satchel and laid them on the kitchen table. She came back, took his hands and kissed them, saying "I love you so much, Benjamin Linus, you will never know how much". Ben, still shy around her, leaned in and started kissing her. He was so overwhelmed with feelings for this beautiful woman that he, for just a moment, let that wall of reserve drop. He kissed her passionately, his penis jolting to attention. He pressed Annie close to him, so that she could feel the bulge in his slacks. This was about as far as they had gone before, and Annie was in no mood to have to fend off any further advances. She gave Ben one final passionate kiss and pulled her face away from his. "Why Ben, you're awfully....passionate tonight" she said, smiling. "It's because you're so beautiful, Annie Pallister, who could resist you"? Ben said ardently. She giggled, brushed his cheek with her finger and turned to get the items off of the table.
Ben surprised her by coming up from behind and enveloping her in his arms. Annie loved when Ben did this; he may not have been athletic, but his touch was electric to her. "I love you so much, Annie, you've made all the pain and suffering I've gone through seem worthwhile, a test to prove I was worthy of you. I promise I will never, ever do anything to hurt you, that I will do everything I can to protect you and make you happy". Annie thought this was rather odd, coming from Ben. While he was always polite and charming to her, he could certainly be difficult to deal with at times, what with his tendency towards silence for hours on end, his rare --thankfully-- outbursts of temper that scared everyone who was unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of them, the feeling that he was never quite all there emotionally. This was different, though, it was almost....chivalrous. Annie wouldn't have expected it from Ben, but she was delighted that he showed that side of himself, on today of all days.
The DHARMA people had planned well when constructing their facilities on The Island and instead of having to go through the jungle, with all its potential dangers, had built a series of below-ground tunnels connecting the various stations and docks on the coast of The Island. Ben and Annie entered the tunnel in The Village and rode the golf cart along the underground path to the Pala Ferry dock. They made small talk, both nervous. They exited the tunnel to find Jonathan waiting. He was dressed in formal clothes, like he was going to the opera or ballet in Paris. Annie looked at Ben, ready to upbraid him for inviting someone else along, but Ben gently put his right index finger over her lips and said softly, in that voice that drove Annie mad, "Don't worry, love, Jonathan is only here to help me make this an evening you won't forget. Right, Jonathan?". There was a very slight hint of malice in Ben's tone and both Jonathan and Annie picked up on it. Jonathan defused the situation by smiling, chuckling and saying "I'll be like a good English butler, invisible until needed". He bowed formally, the three friends laughed and they walked up the dock and got in the boat.
It was a short ride to Pala, as the small island was only two miles offshore from the main Island. Ben had given the driver coordinates of where he needed to be let off, so that they didn't have to trudge through the undergrowth and the Hydra station to get to the veranda. The driver was supremely skilled and he let the three off in a shallow cove about 300 yards from the veranda and set anchor. The sun would be setting in about an hour; there was a light breeze and since it was low tide, they were able to walk along the shore at a good pace. In due course, they arrived at the veranda. "Oh Ben, it's lovely, I can't believe you!" Annie exclaimed, her heart leaping with joy. Ben and Jonathan had spent the entire day before putting finishing touches on it and had added some torch holders so that Ben and Annie could spend time alone after the sun went down. Jonathan immediately fell in to his butler role, talking the food and provisions (tablecloths, candles, cutlery, dishes, glasses and serving items) and putting them on the serving table, before beginning to lay out the main table.
The table underneath the veranda was duly readied, the candles requiring some work to stay lit in the breeze. Jonathan and Ben had prepared a meal of a mixed green salad with DHARMA Ranch dressing, roasted boar with a nice glazing, potatoes au gratin, steamed mixed vegetables, soft French bread and a chocolate mousse for desert. They had the correct wine, a red Bordeaux, fresh water from a spring that only Ben knew existed, orange juice and coffee, made in a French press coffee maker. The cutlery was something Ben had inherited from his maternal Grandmother, as were the dishes. As Jonathan prepared the meal, Ben and Annie took off their shoes and walked to the water's edge. How incredibly beautiful it was there! The sun filtered through the clouds, tinting them a soft pink, the breeze caused Annie's hair to hair to wave around and the waves provided a calming backdrop of sound, a timeless reminder of how life goes on, no matter what. Normally, Ben would be stiff and formal on these occasions, as he had never quite mastered the easy charm that he envied so much in movie stars.
This night, however, he gave himself over completely to Annie, as much as he could, that is, knowing what he did about his future. He told Annie, again, how much he loved her, how he hoped that he was worthy of her love. "Ben! I hope *I'm* worthy of your love, you could have easily stopped seeing me after all the tears I shed after your...announcement". This was still a sore point between them and Annie quickly moved on to lighter topics. "You look so handsome tonight, I'm very flattered that you wore my favorite shirt". He bowed, smiled and said "You're quite welcome, Annie Pallister". Casting a quick glance backwards to make sure Jonathan wasn't looking --he wasn't, he was engrossed in his preparations-- Ben took Annie in his arms and gently kissed her. He was afraid of losing control of his penis again, so he quickly pulled away and held her, putting his face next to hers. "You smell like hibiscus flowers, Annie, you smell wonderful". She giggled and Ben held her even closer. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world than here, with anyone else but you" Ben said, as passionately as it was possible for him to do so. Just then, a bell rang, signaling that dinner was ready and the very-much-in-love couple walked back towards the veranda.
Jonathan had practiced for a week, in his usual meticulous manner, on the proper way to be a butler and serve a formal dinner, getting his information from an English etiquette book from the 1920's that had been found in Ben's vast library. Ben pulled out Annie's chair, gave her a light peck with his lips on her neck and made sure she was comfortably seated. Jonathan pulled Ben's chair back and made sure he was comfortable. He immediately went to the serving table and brought the salads, the water and the wine, with the required glasses. He retired to a chair behind the serving table, out of view of Ben and Annie, lit a candle and began reading a physics book. Ben and Annie stole shy glances at each other as they ate, the small talk about various Village gossip and DHARMA projects the perfect way to dissipate their shared nervousness. In due time, all the courses were served and the two were fully sated. The wine had caused Ben to loosen up a little and he was strangely calm as he prepared the next part of the evening for Annie.
Ben had racked his brain about to how to find a ring for Annie without arousing the suspicion of others in The Village. Gossip was inevitable in such a small society and he wanted Annie to be completely surprised. About a month prior to the events being described, he had been going through boxes in the attic of the house he still shared with his Dad, looking for the cutlery and plates bestowed upon him by his Gran. To his amazement, he found a small velvet box with the cutlery. When he opened the box, it literally took his breath away: it was a gold band, with a small diamond perfectly placed on it. There was a note inside, folded up so as to fit. Ben unwrapped the note and read: "Dearest Benjamin: I know you harbor great guilt about your mother, but you have been a constant source of joy to me in the all-too-brief time I've had to spend with you. I grieve for Emily, but in that grief, I hope that one day this ring will allow you to bring joy to a woman, a woman you hope to marry. All my love forever, Gran". It took him almost 26 years, but that day was the day that all the tears flowed from Benjamin Linus, the tears of grief and sadness about the mother he never knew, except as apparitions outside his window and the sonar fence all those years ago, the emotions overwhelming him.
Jonathan knew that Ben wouldn't risk losing the ring as he walked around with Annie, so he was entrusted with its safekeeping. He fondled the smooth velvet in his coat pocket, preparing to put it in the middle of a bouquet of the most beautiful flowers he and Ben could find. He waited until Ben had taken Annie a good distance away from the veranda on their post-meal constitutional and after the table was cleared, cleaned and reset, he pulled out the bouquet from a cooler, placed it in the middle of the table and gently set the box in the middle. "God bless you both, Ben and Annie" he murmured, tears beginning to form in his eyes.
"OK, *this* is the most nervous I've ever felt" thought Ben, as he gently steered Annie back to the veranda. Jonathan had left two tumblers placed on the table in front of each chair, the tumblers filled with an expensive cognac that Jonathan's dad brought to the Island. There was a small plate of fruit off to the side of them with the correct cutlery, coffee and the appropriate condiments and small votive candles surrounding the bouquet. Being the scientists they were, Ben and Jonathan had planned for evening breezes and constructed simple walls for the veranda out of palm fronds. After he had attached them with thin rope, leaving one panel facing away from the direction the wind was blowing open as an entry, Jonathan took his leave, where he was to wait at the edge of the jungle until Ben summoned him by ringing the antique bell that Ben had found in that amazing treasure trove of boxes from his Gran.
Arriving back after their walk, Ben kissed Annie before she entered the now enclosed veranda and said "Close your eyes, please, my love". Annie had a shiver of fright run through her, and was immediately ashamed of it; how could she feel that, right here, right now? She did as Ben had requested. She felt his gentle touch guide her in to her chair and after she was seated, he heard him say in that low baritone that went right to her sexual core, "A few more moments, keep your eyes closed, I want everything to be perfect for you". When she opened her eyes, she saw the set up and let out a gasp of delight. "Ben, it's beautiful! It's arranged in such a lovely way!" she exclaimed and Ben beamed with pride. "You think of everything, don't you?" she said, his reply of "I try" being more grave than he had intended; understandable, though, given the events of that morning.
He walked around to where she was sitting, tumbler of cognac in his hand. He got on his haunches, gently took her hand, kissed it, picked up her tumbler and handed it to her. "To us, to our future happiness" Ben said, emotion in his voice. "To us" Annie purred as she clinked her glass to his. Ben smiled, got up and walked back to his chair. He picked up his fork and began eating the fruit, afraid that Annie would notice the velvet box buried in the bouquet of flowers. After finishing the fruit and cognac, Ben wiped his mouth off and took a deep breath. "There's no turning back from this point" he thought.
He smiled at Annie, who shyly smiled back. He got up and walked around the table to where she was sitting. He went behind her chair, gently placed one hand on her shoulder, brushed her hair aside with the other, leaned down and nuzzled her neck and earlobes for a good minute. He had planned this, so when Annie started to fidget, which Ben knew meant she was getting excited, he pulled away, softly rubbed off the moisture he had left behind on her neck and ears, and took two steps around the table. He looked her in the eyes, paused, then said "Annie, you know I love you with all of my being, don't you?", it being both a question and plea. Annie was startled a bit and hesitated slightly before saying "Benjamin" --she only used his full name when she was wanted to convey how serious she was-- "Benjamin, you know I've loved you since that day on your birthday when you took my carved doll. I love you more than anything, you have to know that".
Ben panicked slightly, terrified he had said the wrong thing. "My dearest Annie, you don't know how happy that makes me feel. I've loved you too since that day and I've never wanted to cause you the slightest bit of pain. I know I'm very difficult to be around at times" --at this, Annie started to protest, but Ben held up his hand in the universal sign for "STOP"-- "you're wonderful to want to say differently, but we both know it is true. You are so sweet and gentle and such wonderful company, and you've been everything a man could ever want in someone he loves, that I wanted to bring you here tonight before I told you what I've wanted to say for years". Again, Ben's heart nearly stopped as Annie looked frightened. Hurriedly, he went over, knelt in the sand before her and said "No, no, please, my love, don't be afraid. I want to say one thing to you and if you answer how I hope you will, you will make me the happiest man on the face of the earth". Annie relaxed slightly at this, and that made Ben relax a bit as well.
"Look in the middle of the bouquet" Ben said, with all the tenderness he could muster. "Oh why isn't this natural for me, why do I have to *think* about it" he berated himself in his mind, as he saw Annie cautiously peer in to the bouquet. "Oh Ben...." was all she could say, as she pulled the dark velvet box out and opened it. Annie had waited patiently for years for this moment and it didn't disappoint. When she opened the box, the light from a torch gleamed off the gold band of the ring. Turning the box slightly, the light in turn gleamed off the diamond. "Oh, Ben, it's beautiful, where on earth did you get it?" Annie managed to gasp. "From my Gran" he said flatly, Annie's heart both heavy and joyous at the same time. Taking her left hand, Ben looked up at Annie, who met his eyes and said "Will you marry me, Annie Pallister?" in an almost comically grave voice. Annie didn't hesitate as she got off her chair, kneeled in the sand and threw her arms around Ben's neck. "Oh, yes, yes, of course I will, I've wanted nothing else for years, Ben". Benjamin Linus heard nothing beyond "Oh, yes, yes...." as a joy he never knew before, and was to never know again in all his days, suffused his entire being. He started to cry and took off his glasses, placing them on the table. He leaned towards Annie, his dear, sweet Annie, and devoured her with kisses. They kissed for a few minutes, but Annie stopped them both because it was going to end up in sex if they continued. As much as she and Ben both wanted that, they had agreed years before to wait until they got married, to facilitate making love for the first time being even more special.
Ben stood up and held out his hand. Annie gently took it and used it to balance herself as she got to her feet. They were both still stunned by the recent turn of events and stood under the veranda roof for what seemed like ages, just clinging on to each other, unwilling to let go. Finally, Ben pushed Annie slightly away from his body, leaned in and kissed her on the lips, said "I love you so much", kissed her again and then leaned over, taking in his hand the bell which he then rang, signaling to Jonathan that all was well.
I wanted to provide some back story so that the whole section after they get to the veranda had some context so that the feelings Ben and Annie feel had more depth.
This is the third part of my Ben Every Seven Years Trilogy. I'd written about him as a 12 year old and a 19 year old, so 26 seemed the next logical age. I did have to change one major detail: in the 19 year old Ben story I mentioned that they got married at 21, but I ignored that to provide the contrast between agreeing to help with The Purge in the morning and proposing to Annie that night; I've based Ben's age on the fact that he was born in 1963, details of how I know that being LOST fan geek stuff. The two years between Ben proposing to Annie and The Purge provide plenty of time for those crazy kids to get married, Annie to get pregnant and for her to *SIGH* die. *SOB*
I hope you find it romantic and I was happy to find a place for my alter-ego, gay boy Jonathan, in the story. Note: Annie's last name, Pallister, was taken from my favorite English soccer player, Gary Pallister, who played for Manchester United in the 1990's.
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In his 26 years of living, Benjamin Linus had only been this nervous once before. That happened 14 years previously when, after he had run away from the DHARMA Village and encountered the mysterious Hostile in the jungle, he begged the Hostile to take him back to his people. The short wait for an answer had been excruciating, 5 seconds seeming like 50,000. This was different, however, for today Ben was going to propose marriage to his beloved Annie Pallister.
The fourteen years since that encounter with the Hostile, whose name Ben found out was Richard, had been fascinating ones for Mr. Linus, if viewed from afar with a clinical eye. By asking Richard to take him in to the Hostiles embrace, Ben knew that he was turning his back on his people completely. At the back of his mind, Young Ben had known that might mean death for his people, who were embroiled in a war with the Island natives, whom they called The Hostiles. Apart from Annie, the one person he truly connected with, he was mostly unconcerned with that prospect; in any case, he was going to make sure Annie was safe before any potential nastiness came down. The one thing that kept him going was his amazing ability to wait, to be patient. People always remarked that Ben seemed so in control of his feelings, that he seemed to float above concerns that most people took for granted. Ben never understood those kinds of remarks, because inside he was always a maelstrom of feelings: bitter hatred towards his loutish, beer drinking Dad, who wounded Ben to his core when he snarled an accusation that Ben had killed his mother merely by being born. While this was technically true, what an appalling thing to say to a 12-year old boy! Scorn for the DHARMA Initiative, whose stated goals of doing research for the betterment of all mankind had curdled in to ethically dubious research in to mind control, manipulation of the genetic code of humans and animals and a smug, superior attitude towards the Island's native population. Contempt for most of his fellow DHARMA workers, who had neither the intellect or insight that Ben possessed in spades. Then there was Annie.
Annie had been the first person in his life to show Ben kindness without expecting anything in return. When she walked up to him not long after his arrival on The Island and ingratiated herself with the offer of an Apollo Bar, Ben melted inside. She was so beautiful! Her round cheeks, long straight brown hair, the gorgeous eyes, they had pierced Ben's heart in a way that he would have scarcely imagined, a defensive shell having been created by Young Ben to protect himself from the hurt and pain that seemed to rule his world. Annie was also very intelligent, and that appealed to Ben very much, he who spent so much of his time lost in books, devouring them for knowledge and hints of a better life than the one he was seemingly consigned to. Annie was one of those people for whom mathematics came easy; by the time she was 15, she had been teaching her teacher about complex concepts that few could even grasp. She was considered one of the bright hopes of the DHARMA Initiative, which placed so much emphasis on mathematics due to the accursed Numbers.
By the time Ben had turned 17, he was madly in love in Annie. She had blossomed in to a beautiful young woman, her earlier described attributes now complimented by beautiful round breasts, a curvaceous figure and, due to her interest in swimming, a toned, trim body. Seeing Annie had two affects on Ben: unbridled lust and a feeling of completeness, of her being who he was destined to spend his life with. Luckily for him, Annie felt the same way: as Ben had grown from the tall, gawky boy in to a handsome man, Annie couldn't believe that Fortune had brought Ben to The Island, so remote, so far removed from what was called "the real world". Almost upon their meeting, they became inseparable; they spent as much time together as they could. With Ben's Dad being lost in his own world of pain and beer, he'd grown up almost by himself. Annie, however, came from a close knit family, there being her parents and an older brother.
In the five years since Young Ben had met Richard, Benjamin Linus had lead a double life. It was agreed between them that they would meet once a year to discuss whether Ben was ready to join the Natives, as Ben called them. They settled on December 22nd, Ben's birthday, as people in The Village knew it was also the day his mother had died giving birth to him and they kept their distance. This made it easy for Ben to slip away, turn off the sonar fence and meet Richard in the same clearing as their first meeting without being followed, without arousing suspicion. In the fifth year of these meetings, Ben had been given the news that he had waited for: he would be able to join the Natives at an unspecified point in the future, but the price was going to be very, very steep: he would have to facilitate the Purge of all living DHARMA members, be the agent of their demise. Since Ben had thought this possibility over in his mind a thousand times, his answer was swift: he would do whatever it takes, but in return, he must be able to bring along two people: Annie and his friend Jonathan, who was a brilliant scientist in the making, working on genetics and gene therapy. Richard, after a long pause, agreed and disappeared in to the jungle, saying he would see Ben in one year's time.
Ben and Annie's relationship, so sweet, so pure, so innocent up until that point --they hadn't had sex yet-- nearly broke apart when 17-year old Ben stood up in the conference room on Pala and told the entire population of The Village that he was not going to pursue his scientific studies any more, that he was going to become a janitor like his Dad. The reason he did this, of course, was because people like his Dad were almost invisible to the higher ups in the Initiative, they were just worker drones, barely worthy of thought. This attitude would allow Ben the latitude he needed to help The Natives carry out their plan. But even Ben, so wise beyond his years, so perceptive about others feelings and thoughts, was surprised at the fury he unleashed with his announcement. For the next two years, he was hounded constantly to change his mind, badgered about his reasoning, almost shunned by his people for his decision. The announcement had an unintended side-affect that he hadn't anticipated: it strained his relationship with Annie. There were many tear-filled scenes as they hiked the beautiful valleys of The Island, Annie pleading with Ben to share his heart with her, to tell her why he was throwing away a brilliant scientific career so that he could haul beer to The Flame. As much as Ben loved her, he couldn't tell her the reason for his decision and that inability to confide in her, when before his heart had been hers to know, caused a rift, mostly unseen but still there, between them.
As he stood by the mirror grooming himself, Ben played the evening's events over in his head one last time, to make sure that he'd left nothing out. He had bribed one of the boatman who ran people back and forth from the Pala Ferry dock to the tiny island where animal research was happening to take him, Annie and Jonathan there just before sundown; the boatman risked consequences for deviating from the usual ferry schedule. Jonathan, devoted friend Jonathan, had agreed to play waiter/busboy for the evening Ben had planned. The two men had walked every inch of the Pala shore six months before, searching for a place where the sun set just right, where the sometimes fierce winds were blocked, where the ocean wasn't so turbulent. They had found it not far from the Hydra station and there they had spent their free time building a small veranda-like structure, little more than poles that held up a thatched roof. They built a table for two with comfortable chairs for use inside of it. They also built a small preparation area about twenty feet away, which would allow Jonathan to serve Ben and Annie's needs, but also keep his distance so they had privacy.
Ben picked December 22 as the date he would propose to Annie. He wanted to remove the memory of his mother's death from that day, replace it with something more joyous, so he and Jonathan had targeted that date for everything to be ready. Unfortunately for young Mr. Linus, his timing, usually so impeccable, was poor: at his annual meeting with Richard earlier that morning, he had been told what he longed to hear: the DHARMA Purge was to take place in two years time, on December 22, 1992, the day Ben turned 29. As Richard once again melted in to the jungle with his feline grace, Ben had a horrifying realization: he was going to propose to Annie that night and he had only two years to break her in to the idea of his taking part in The Purge. Annie's mother had died the previous year, but there was still her father and brother to account for. After the initial wave of terror flooded over him, Ben resolved to find a way around the issues that now presented themselves and to enjoy his evening with his beloved Annie.
Ben looked beautiful as he gathered up the food he and Jonathan had prepared, some DHARMA wine and other provisions. He was wearing a favorite shirt of Annie's, a long-sleeved dress shirt with light and dark gray stripes. Ben didn't like that the stripes accentuated his growing paunch, but this was Annie's night. He chose his very best dark navy slacks, dark gym socks, black hiking shoes and a nice belt to complete the ensemble. He spent a good ten minutes getting his hair just right and after he put on his gold, wire rimmed glasses and rolled up the sleeves of the shirt a bit, he pronounced himself ready. He took a deep breath, exhaled and went to pick up Annie; Jonathan would meet them at the Pala Ferry dock with his part of the provisions. He walked the four doors down to the Pallisters and gently knocked on the door. He had told Annie that he wanted to spend his birthday with her, that he had something special planned and could she shoo her family away before he arrived? She had done so with her usual tact and charm and when she opened the door, Ben almost burst in to tears, she was so beautiful. Her hair had a lustrous shine to it, her cheeks were rosy and the flowered sun frock with matching shawl made her worthy of a Renaissance master's painting. "Good evening, Annie" Ben said, still, after all these years, formal and polite. "Hi, Ben, come on in, everyone's gone". He nodded slightly and crossed the threshold of the house.
Annie closed the door and walked over to where Ben was standing. She took his picnic basket and satchel and laid them on the kitchen table. She came back, took his hands and kissed them, saying "I love you so much, Benjamin Linus, you will never know how much". Ben, still shy around her, leaned in and started kissing her. He was so overwhelmed with feelings for this beautiful woman that he, for just a moment, let that wall of reserve drop. He kissed her passionately, his penis jolting to attention. He pressed Annie close to him, so that she could feel the bulge in his slacks. This was about as far as they had gone before, and Annie was in no mood to have to fend off any further advances. She gave Ben one final passionate kiss and pulled her face away from his. "Why Ben, you're awfully....passionate tonight" she said, smiling. "It's because you're so beautiful, Annie Pallister, who could resist you"? Ben said ardently. She giggled, brushed his cheek with her finger and turned to get the items off of the table.
Ben surprised her by coming up from behind and enveloping her in his arms. Annie loved when Ben did this; he may not have been athletic, but his touch was electric to her. "I love you so much, Annie, you've made all the pain and suffering I've gone through seem worthwhile, a test to prove I was worthy of you. I promise I will never, ever do anything to hurt you, that I will do everything I can to protect you and make you happy". Annie thought this was rather odd, coming from Ben. While he was always polite and charming to her, he could certainly be difficult to deal with at times, what with his tendency towards silence for hours on end, his rare --thankfully-- outbursts of temper that scared everyone who was unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of them, the feeling that he was never quite all there emotionally. This was different, though, it was almost....chivalrous. Annie wouldn't have expected it from Ben, but she was delighted that he showed that side of himself, on today of all days.
The DHARMA people had planned well when constructing their facilities on The Island and instead of having to go through the jungle, with all its potential dangers, had built a series of below-ground tunnels connecting the various stations and docks on the coast of The Island. Ben and Annie entered the tunnel in The Village and rode the golf cart along the underground path to the Pala Ferry dock. They made small talk, both nervous. They exited the tunnel to find Jonathan waiting. He was dressed in formal clothes, like he was going to the opera or ballet in Paris. Annie looked at Ben, ready to upbraid him for inviting someone else along, but Ben gently put his right index finger over her lips and said softly, in that voice that drove Annie mad, "Don't worry, love, Jonathan is only here to help me make this an evening you won't forget. Right, Jonathan?". There was a very slight hint of malice in Ben's tone and both Jonathan and Annie picked up on it. Jonathan defused the situation by smiling, chuckling and saying "I'll be like a good English butler, invisible until needed". He bowed formally, the three friends laughed and they walked up the dock and got in the boat.
It was a short ride to Pala, as the small island was only two miles offshore from the main Island. Ben had given the driver coordinates of where he needed to be let off, so that they didn't have to trudge through the undergrowth and the Hydra station to get to the veranda. The driver was supremely skilled and he let the three off in a shallow cove about 300 yards from the veranda and set anchor. The sun would be setting in about an hour; there was a light breeze and since it was low tide, they were able to walk along the shore at a good pace. In due course, they arrived at the veranda. "Oh Ben, it's lovely, I can't believe you!" Annie exclaimed, her heart leaping with joy. Ben and Jonathan had spent the entire day before putting finishing touches on it and had added some torch holders so that Ben and Annie could spend time alone after the sun went down. Jonathan immediately fell in to his butler role, talking the food and provisions (tablecloths, candles, cutlery, dishes, glasses and serving items) and putting them on the serving table, before beginning to lay out the main table.
The table underneath the veranda was duly readied, the candles requiring some work to stay lit in the breeze. Jonathan and Ben had prepared a meal of a mixed green salad with DHARMA Ranch dressing, roasted boar with a nice glazing, potatoes au gratin, steamed mixed vegetables, soft French bread and a chocolate mousse for desert. They had the correct wine, a red Bordeaux, fresh water from a spring that only Ben knew existed, orange juice and coffee, made in a French press coffee maker. The cutlery was something Ben had inherited from his maternal Grandmother, as were the dishes. As Jonathan prepared the meal, Ben and Annie took off their shoes and walked to the water's edge. How incredibly beautiful it was there! The sun filtered through the clouds, tinting them a soft pink, the breeze caused Annie's hair to hair to wave around and the waves provided a calming backdrop of sound, a timeless reminder of how life goes on, no matter what. Normally, Ben would be stiff and formal on these occasions, as he had never quite mastered the easy charm that he envied so much in movie stars.
This night, however, he gave himself over completely to Annie, as much as he could, that is, knowing what he did about his future. He told Annie, again, how much he loved her, how he hoped that he was worthy of her love. "Ben! I hope *I'm* worthy of your love, you could have easily stopped seeing me after all the tears I shed after your...announcement". This was still a sore point between them and Annie quickly moved on to lighter topics. "You look so handsome tonight, I'm very flattered that you wore my favorite shirt". He bowed, smiled and said "You're quite welcome, Annie Pallister". Casting a quick glance backwards to make sure Jonathan wasn't looking --he wasn't, he was engrossed in his preparations-- Ben took Annie in his arms and gently kissed her. He was afraid of losing control of his penis again, so he quickly pulled away and held her, putting his face next to hers. "You smell like hibiscus flowers, Annie, you smell wonderful". She giggled and Ben held her even closer. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world than here, with anyone else but you" Ben said, as passionately as it was possible for him to do so. Just then, a bell rang, signaling that dinner was ready and the very-much-in-love couple walked back towards the veranda.
Jonathan had practiced for a week, in his usual meticulous manner, on the proper way to be a butler and serve a formal dinner, getting his information from an English etiquette book from the 1920's that had been found in Ben's vast library. Ben pulled out Annie's chair, gave her a light peck with his lips on her neck and made sure she was comfortably seated. Jonathan pulled Ben's chair back and made sure he was comfortable. He immediately went to the serving table and brought the salads, the water and the wine, with the required glasses. He retired to a chair behind the serving table, out of view of Ben and Annie, lit a candle and began reading a physics book. Ben and Annie stole shy glances at each other as they ate, the small talk about various Village gossip and DHARMA projects the perfect way to dissipate their shared nervousness. In due time, all the courses were served and the two were fully sated. The wine had caused Ben to loosen up a little and he was strangely calm as he prepared the next part of the evening for Annie.
Ben had racked his brain about to how to find a ring for Annie without arousing the suspicion of others in The Village. Gossip was inevitable in such a small society and he wanted Annie to be completely surprised. About a month prior to the events being described, he had been going through boxes in the attic of the house he still shared with his Dad, looking for the cutlery and plates bestowed upon him by his Gran. To his amazement, he found a small velvet box with the cutlery. When he opened the box, it literally took his breath away: it was a gold band, with a small diamond perfectly placed on it. There was a note inside, folded up so as to fit. Ben unwrapped the note and read: "Dearest Benjamin: I know you harbor great guilt about your mother, but you have been a constant source of joy to me in the all-too-brief time I've had to spend with you. I grieve for Emily, but in that grief, I hope that one day this ring will allow you to bring joy to a woman, a woman you hope to marry. All my love forever, Gran". It took him almost 26 years, but that day was the day that all the tears flowed from Benjamin Linus, the tears of grief and sadness about the mother he never knew, except as apparitions outside his window and the sonar fence all those years ago, the emotions overwhelming him.
Jonathan knew that Ben wouldn't risk losing the ring as he walked around with Annie, so he was entrusted with its safekeeping. He fondled the smooth velvet in his coat pocket, preparing to put it in the middle of a bouquet of the most beautiful flowers he and Ben could find. He waited until Ben had taken Annie a good distance away from the veranda on their post-meal constitutional and after the table was cleared, cleaned and reset, he pulled out the bouquet from a cooler, placed it in the middle of the table and gently set the box in the middle. "God bless you both, Ben and Annie" he murmured, tears beginning to form in his eyes.
"OK, *this* is the most nervous I've ever felt" thought Ben, as he gently steered Annie back to the veranda. Jonathan had left two tumblers placed on the table in front of each chair, the tumblers filled with an expensive cognac that Jonathan's dad brought to the Island. There was a small plate of fruit off to the side of them with the correct cutlery, coffee and the appropriate condiments and small votive candles surrounding the bouquet. Being the scientists they were, Ben and Jonathan had planned for evening breezes and constructed simple walls for the veranda out of palm fronds. After he had attached them with thin rope, leaving one panel facing away from the direction the wind was blowing open as an entry, Jonathan took his leave, where he was to wait at the edge of the jungle until Ben summoned him by ringing the antique bell that Ben had found in that amazing treasure trove of boxes from his Gran.
Arriving back after their walk, Ben kissed Annie before she entered the now enclosed veranda and said "Close your eyes, please, my love". Annie had a shiver of fright run through her, and was immediately ashamed of it; how could she feel that, right here, right now? She did as Ben had requested. She felt his gentle touch guide her in to her chair and after she was seated, he heard him say in that low baritone that went right to her sexual core, "A few more moments, keep your eyes closed, I want everything to be perfect for you". When she opened her eyes, she saw the set up and let out a gasp of delight. "Ben, it's beautiful! It's arranged in such a lovely way!" she exclaimed and Ben beamed with pride. "You think of everything, don't you?" she said, his reply of "I try" being more grave than he had intended; understandable, though, given the events of that morning.
He walked around to where she was sitting, tumbler of cognac in his hand. He got on his haunches, gently took her hand, kissed it, picked up her tumbler and handed it to her. "To us, to our future happiness" Ben said, emotion in his voice. "To us" Annie purred as she clinked her glass to his. Ben smiled, got up and walked back to his chair. He picked up his fork and began eating the fruit, afraid that Annie would notice the velvet box buried in the bouquet of flowers. After finishing the fruit and cognac, Ben wiped his mouth off and took a deep breath. "There's no turning back from this point" he thought.
He smiled at Annie, who shyly smiled back. He got up and walked around the table to where she was sitting. He went behind her chair, gently placed one hand on her shoulder, brushed her hair aside with the other, leaned down and nuzzled her neck and earlobes for a good minute. He had planned this, so when Annie started to fidget, which Ben knew meant she was getting excited, he pulled away, softly rubbed off the moisture he had left behind on her neck and ears, and took two steps around the table. He looked her in the eyes, paused, then said "Annie, you know I love you with all of my being, don't you?", it being both a question and plea. Annie was startled a bit and hesitated slightly before saying "Benjamin" --she only used his full name when she was wanted to convey how serious she was-- "Benjamin, you know I've loved you since that day on your birthday when you took my carved doll. I love you more than anything, you have to know that".
Ben panicked slightly, terrified he had said the wrong thing. "My dearest Annie, you don't know how happy that makes me feel. I've loved you too since that day and I've never wanted to cause you the slightest bit of pain. I know I'm very difficult to be around at times" --at this, Annie started to protest, but Ben held up his hand in the universal sign for "STOP"-- "you're wonderful to want to say differently, but we both know it is true. You are so sweet and gentle and such wonderful company, and you've been everything a man could ever want in someone he loves, that I wanted to bring you here tonight before I told you what I've wanted to say for years". Again, Ben's heart nearly stopped as Annie looked frightened. Hurriedly, he went over, knelt in the sand before her and said "No, no, please, my love, don't be afraid. I want to say one thing to you and if you answer how I hope you will, you will make me the happiest man on the face of the earth". Annie relaxed slightly at this, and that made Ben relax a bit as well.
"Look in the middle of the bouquet" Ben said, with all the tenderness he could muster. "Oh why isn't this natural for me, why do I have to *think* about it" he berated himself in his mind, as he saw Annie cautiously peer in to the bouquet. "Oh Ben...." was all she could say, as she pulled the dark velvet box out and opened it. Annie had waited patiently for years for this moment and it didn't disappoint. When she opened the box, the light from a torch gleamed off the gold band of the ring. Turning the box slightly, the light in turn gleamed off the diamond. "Oh, Ben, it's beautiful, where on earth did you get it?" Annie managed to gasp. "From my Gran" he said flatly, Annie's heart both heavy and joyous at the same time. Taking her left hand, Ben looked up at Annie, who met his eyes and said "Will you marry me, Annie Pallister?" in an almost comically grave voice. Annie didn't hesitate as she got off her chair, kneeled in the sand and threw her arms around Ben's neck. "Oh, yes, yes, of course I will, I've wanted nothing else for years, Ben". Benjamin Linus heard nothing beyond "Oh, yes, yes...." as a joy he never knew before, and was to never know again in all his days, suffused his entire being. He started to cry and took off his glasses, placing them on the table. He leaned towards Annie, his dear, sweet Annie, and devoured her with kisses. They kissed for a few minutes, but Annie stopped them both because it was going to end up in sex if they continued. As much as she and Ben both wanted that, they had agreed years before to wait until they got married, to facilitate making love for the first time being even more special.
Ben stood up and held out his hand. Annie gently took it and used it to balance herself as she got to her feet. They were both still stunned by the recent turn of events and stood under the veranda roof for what seemed like ages, just clinging on to each other, unwilling to let go. Finally, Ben pushed Annie slightly away from his body, leaned in and kissed her on the lips, said "I love you so much", kissed her again and then leaned over, taking in his hand the bell which he then rang, signaling to Jonathan that all was well.