it saved my soul

[helpwess]

Livejournal, I wanted to give you this awesome song I think you all need to hear, but all the music is on the computer which is currently stored on the top shelf of the closet in the back room (seriously, I am living in a house which is currently being remodeled [thanks to jascott for realizing that when I couldn't] and I have been wearing the same five shirts for the past two and a half weeks [have I mentioned that yet, here? I've been telling everyone I know in an attempt to get people to understand (pity) me.] and having my iMac up and running is not something I am able to achieve, mostly because there is absolutely no place to safely put it), so instead I'll give you a picture:



(it was going to be a Daniel Johnston song.)

Anyway, one of my favorite games to play lately is the game where you think up awesome new sexual moves and names. For some reason I absolutely cannot get the Mr. to play this game with me. He is NOT. A. VAILABLE, you could say. Arguably the most fun part of this game is the coming up with the name of the move rather than what the move actually entails, although sometimes they're both more or less equally good (see: rusty trombone).

SEXUAL MOVES I HAVE INVENTED:
-the Pork Loin
-the Hopalong Cassidy
-the Yellow Marshmallow
-the Heritage Thrust
-the Morphine Drip
-the Swedish Curtain

Your job now, obviously, is to determine what each of these moves is, and then write a story about each of them, involving John Sheppard.