Meme time! You Know You Live in [x-place-here] When...
1. Go to Google (or Yahoo) and type, "You know you're from (your state / province) when..."
2. Cut and paste the list.
3. Bold the items that apply to you.
1. You know how to (correctly) pronounce Edinburgh, Buckinghamshire, Welwyn Garden City, Loughborough and Gloucester.
2. You know how to use HP sauce, Worcestershire sauce, BBQ sauce, and you do use them. All the time.
3. Tea is a drink and a meal.
4. English people don't only drive on the left, they walk on the left.
5. You own at least 5 umbrellas and 3 overcoats.
6. The weather forecast for every day of the year, all year, is one of the following:
a) Cloudy
b) Rain
c) Showers
d) Snow
e) Hail
f) Strong wind
g) All of the above
7. You know what pub stands for, and where the nearest one to your house is.
8. You love beer. Warm. And flat.
9. 5 pounds for a pack of cigarettes is normal for you unless you travel abroad, in which case you bring them back in thousands, and refuse to buy cigarettes in England should you run out.
10. There is a 70% chance the last time you saw a completely blue sky it was outside the UK. ... orz I miss France already.
11. When English people actually use the word "sky", 99% of the time it refers to the satellite TV.
12. Talking about the weather is a perfectly acceptable way to start a conversation. I'M SORRY I BABBLE ABOUT THE WEATHER SO MUCH YOU GUYS orz
13. A conversation about the weather will usually derive into one about football, followed by drinking. Beer. In a pub.
14. You've either seen every episode of Eastenders and Hollyoaks, or you've always heard about them and never seen a single episode.
15. You recognise Northern, Southern, Liverpool, Scottish, Welsh and Irish accents within the first 6 words of conversation.
16. Chips are an independent dish, not a side order.
17. You hate the size and weight of English coins. (Especially 2p ones)
18. You think every website should end in .co.uk, and google.com is for fancy foreigners.
19. You've seen a 50 pound note, and pissed off your corner shop by using one to buy a packet of cigarettes. (Unless you're foreign, refer to number 9.) Not buying ciggies, but I have been the cashier in this situation.
20. You've seen a cricket and/or rugby match, and you know the only countries that play these sports are either part of the UK, British Isles, or of the British Commonwealth.
21. You call people "mate" even women. Ending sentences with "cheers mate" is considered polite and courteous in some parts of England.
22. You understand English humour, and have somehow managed to appreciate it. You find John Cleese and Rowan Atkinson funny.
23. You know at least 2 of the sign anagrams from the Fawlty Towers hotel. (eg: Watery Fowls, Warty Towels, Fatty Owls, Flowery Twats)
24. Curry is as English as sausage and mash with onion gravy. And you love them both so much.
25. You've been to the Brighton pier. Twice.
26. "Your calling credit is running low. Please arrange a top-up." THAT FUCKING VOICE AAAAARRRGH
27. You love cashback, even though you NEVER get any. However, you get pissed off when you go abroad because shop attendants don't ask you if you want cashback. *always gets cashback*
28. You know what a chav is and how to spot one.
29. You've seen an umbrella shop.
30. You own at least one fake ID.
31. You've been fined for "losing"/not having your train ticket.
32. The cheapest taxi to anywhere, ever, is 10 pounds. If the fare says 8.49, the driver presses a button which rounds it up to 10, (he claims he helped you with your luggage, but you don't have any...)
33. You've had a one on one fight with a daddy long legs. And lost. I AM PIDGE, KILLER OF LONGLEGS.
34. When you go to McDonalds you fill at least 10 of those sauce things just because they're free. You know fine well you won't use more than 2.
35. Someone has randomly tried to sell you marijuana before. They proposed it to you as "bangin' dro", "kwality skunk" or simply "sensi", and the qualitative description was "bang bang", or a similar onomatopoeia.
36. You've been referred to as "mate" by at least 500 people, 75% of whom you don't know. It's an easy way to address customers okay don't judge me.
37. Smoking 'rollies' is completely socially acceptable. Even though they look like joints.
38. It is EXTREMELY rare for someone you don't know to ask you for a cigarette, and if they do they beg. Like REALLY beg: "Excuse me mate (You don't know the person, see Nº36.) Can i ask u for a massive favour? Can I please nick a fag from you?" "Thanks I'm sorry to be rude but can I nick another one for my mate, mate? If not thats cool bruv. Cheers Mate" (See 21.) People have actually asked me for a light before, and Nena for ciggies, though I don't smoke and Nena always declines.
39. You've gotten into a fight for supporting the other team than that of the chavs (See 28.) sitting next to you.
40. You've gotten into a fight for not being English. I was a very Americanized child.
41. You've gotten into a fight for being English, but from a different part of England. There was this one time when I visited the north, but it was more a verbal bitching from two sides of a motorway.
42. You get into fights weekly.
43. You drink cider. With blackcurrant. Second part ewwww first part yaaaaaay
44. You've bought a 2L bottle of strongbow for 69p and drank it at home, alone. This doesn't seem to shock people, especially university students.
45. Clothes from topshop/topman are cool in England, but you can't seem to wear them anywhere else in the world.
46. Emos don't shock you any more. You even know a couple. Several.
47. Grapes have seeds? REALLY!?
48. You've had your phone stolen at least twice. Once at least by a chav.
49. As you're reading this, it's probably raining in England. WITCHCRAFT. HOW DID YOU KNOW.
50. You know the number of at least one Domino's Pizza off by heart. And that of three other takeaways. 01730262626 hello welcome to Papa John's Pizza. 264858 good evening and welcome to Tai's Chinese takeaway. 427427 hi this is Domino's Pizza can I take your order? 118118 hi you've reached directory inquiries...
51. If you're brave enough to drive on the left, you've knocked at least 6 couriers off their bikes before. NOT YET \o/
52. You hate Rihanna for ruining summer 2007 with the song "Umbrella" (Weather forecast for July/August 07 = SHOWERS - See Nº6.) Inescapable catchy song godfuckingdamnit.
53. You always order a double or triple when ordering spirits.
54. In foreign countries, you blame people for not speaking English, never yourself for not speaking the native language. I always feel really bad about this kind of instinctive reaction and try to make myself learn a little local lingo first.
55. Kettles. I don't have to explain this one. Which reminds me that I need to de-scale ours again because limestone in one's tea is hardly tasty.
56. Ribena. Can't live without it.
57. You despise Microsoft and their "US English". AND APPLE. CURSE YOU AMERICANIZATION OF THE GLOBAL LANGUAGE OF ENGLISH.
58. The use of the word "wicked". Enough said.
59. Fags are not gay people. They are cigarettes.
60. There is some secret part of you that enjoys confusing foreigners with obscure slang. /shrug. Guilty pleasures.
Look I found something even more amusing from the same site!
-- TOP 10 MOST RIDICULOUS BRITISH LAWS --
1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.
2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside-down.
3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.
4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day.
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter.
6. In the UK a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet.
7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the King, and the tail of the Queen.
8. It is illegal not to tell the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing.
9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour.
10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.
2. Cut and paste the list.
3. Bold the items that apply to you.
1. You know how to (correctly) pronounce Edinburgh, Buckinghamshire, Welwyn Garden City, Loughborough and Gloucester.
2. You know how to use HP sauce, Worcestershire sauce, BBQ sauce, and you do use them. All the time.
3. Tea is a drink and a meal.
4. English people don't only drive on the left, they walk on the left.
5. You own at least 5 umbrellas and 3 overcoats.
6. The weather forecast for every day of the year, all year, is one of the following:
a) Cloudy
b) Rain
c) Showers
d) Snow
e) Hail
f) Strong wind
g) All of the above
7. You know what pub stands for, and where the nearest one to your house is.
8. You love beer. Warm. And flat.
9. 5 pounds for a pack of cigarettes is normal for you unless you travel abroad, in which case you bring them back in thousands, and refuse to buy cigarettes in England should you run out.
10. There is a 70% chance the last time you saw a completely blue sky it was outside the UK. ... orz I miss France already.
11. When English people actually use the word "sky", 99% of the time it refers to the satellite TV.
12. Talking about the weather is a perfectly acceptable way to start a conversation. I'M SORRY I BABBLE ABOUT THE WEATHER SO MUCH YOU GUYS orz
13. A conversation about the weather will usually derive into one about football, followed by drinking. Beer. In a pub.
14. You've either seen every episode of Eastenders and Hollyoaks, or you've always heard about them and never seen a single episode.
15. You recognise Northern, Southern, Liverpool, Scottish, Welsh and Irish accents within the first 6 words of conversation.
16. Chips are an independent dish, not a side order.
17. You hate the size and weight of English coins. (Especially 2p ones)
18. You think every website should end in .co.uk, and google.com is for fancy foreigners.
19. You've seen a 50 pound note, and pissed off your corner shop by using one to buy a packet of cigarettes. (Unless you're foreign, refer to number 9.) Not buying ciggies, but I have been the cashier in this situation.
20. You've seen a cricket and/or rugby match, and you know the only countries that play these sports are either part of the UK, British Isles, or of the British Commonwealth.
21. You call people "mate" even women. Ending sentences with "cheers mate" is considered polite and courteous in some parts of England.
22. You understand English humour, and have somehow managed to appreciate it. You find John Cleese and Rowan Atkinson funny.
23. You know at least 2 of the sign anagrams from the Fawlty Towers hotel. (eg: Watery Fowls, Warty Towels, Fatty Owls, Flowery Twats)
24. Curry is as English as sausage and mash with onion gravy. And you love them both so much.
25. You've been to the Brighton pier. Twice.
26. "Your calling credit is running low. Please arrange a top-up." THAT FUCKING VOICE AAAAARRRGH
27. You love cashback, even though you NEVER get any. However, you get pissed off when you go abroad because shop attendants don't ask you if you want cashback. *always gets cashback*
28. You know what a chav is and how to spot one.
29. You've seen an umbrella shop.
30. You own at least one fake ID.
31. You've been fined for "losing"/not having your train ticket.
32. The cheapest taxi to anywhere, ever, is 10 pounds. If the fare says 8.49, the driver presses a button which rounds it up to 10, (he claims he helped you with your luggage, but you don't have any...)
33. You've had a one on one fight with a daddy long legs. And lost. I AM PIDGE, KILLER OF LONGLEGS.
34. When you go to McDonalds you fill at least 10 of those sauce things just because they're free. You know fine well you won't use more than 2.
35. Someone has randomly tried to sell you marijuana before. They proposed it to you as "bangin' dro", "kwality skunk" or simply "sensi", and the qualitative description was "bang bang", or a similar onomatopoeia.
36. You've been referred to as "mate" by at least 500 people, 75% of whom you don't know. It's an easy way to address customers okay don't judge me.
37. Smoking 'rollies' is completely socially acceptable. Even though they look like joints.
38. It is EXTREMELY rare for someone you don't know to ask you for a cigarette, and if they do they beg. Like REALLY beg: "Excuse me mate (You don't know the person, see Nº36.) Can i ask u for a massive favour? Can I please nick a fag from you?" "Thanks I'm sorry to be rude but can I nick another one for my mate, mate? If not thats cool bruv. Cheers Mate" (See 21.) People have actually asked me for a light before, and Nena for ciggies, though I don't smoke and Nena always declines.
39. You've gotten into a fight for supporting the other team than that of the chavs (See 28.) sitting next to you.
40. You've gotten into a fight for not being English. I was a very Americanized child.
41. You've gotten into a fight for being English, but from a different part of England. There was this one time when I visited the north, but it was more a verbal bitching from two sides of a motorway.
42. You get into fights weekly.
43. You drink cider. With blackcurrant. Second part ewwww first part yaaaaaay
44. You've bought a 2L bottle of strongbow for 69p and drank it at home, alone. This doesn't seem to shock people, especially university students.
45. Clothes from topshop/topman are cool in England, but you can't seem to wear them anywhere else in the world.
46. Emos don't shock you any more. You even know a couple. Several.
47. Grapes have seeds? REALLY!?
48. You've had your phone stolen at least twice. Once at least by a chav.
49. As you're reading this, it's probably raining in England. WITCHCRAFT. HOW DID YOU KNOW.
50. You know the number of at least one Domino's Pizza off by heart. And that of three other takeaways. 01730262626 hello welcome to Papa John's Pizza. 264858 good evening and welcome to Tai's Chinese takeaway. 427427 hi this is Domino's Pizza can I take your order? 118118 hi you've reached directory inquiries...
51. If you're brave enough to drive on the left, you've knocked at least 6 couriers off their bikes before. NOT YET \o/
52. You hate Rihanna for ruining summer 2007 with the song "Umbrella" (Weather forecast for July/August 07 = SHOWERS - See Nº6.) Inescapable catchy song godfuckingdamnit.
53. You always order a double or triple when ordering spirits.
54. In foreign countries, you blame people for not speaking English, never yourself for not speaking the native language. I always feel really bad about this kind of instinctive reaction and try to make myself learn a little local lingo first.
55. Kettles. I don't have to explain this one. Which reminds me that I need to de-scale ours again because limestone in one's tea is hardly tasty.
56. Ribena. Can't live without it.
57. You despise Microsoft and their "US English". AND APPLE. CURSE YOU AMERICANIZATION OF THE GLOBAL LANGUAGE OF ENGLISH.
58. The use of the word "wicked". Enough said.
59. Fags are not gay people. They are cigarettes.
60. There is some secret part of you that enjoys confusing foreigners with obscure slang. /shrug. Guilty pleasures.
Look I found something even more amusing from the same site!
-- TOP 10 MOST RIDICULOUS BRITISH LAWS --
1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.
2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside-down.
3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.
4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day.
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter.
6. In the UK a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet.
7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the King, and the tail of the Queen.
8. It is illegal not to tell the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing.
9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour.
10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.