(no subject)
i get so angry at myself. why can't i do this. why am i so afraid of that. i don't fucking know. i don't hate myself. oh no. that was before. this is now. i want to do this. and i. i fucking hate a lot of things. ears gross me out. oh i'm so angry. why do i get like this. i wish i wasn't me at times like these, and i wish i didn't find it so easy to cry. i wish. what do i wish? i don't fucking know. i wish. i just want all this to end because i.. i feel like something's missing. i feel rather empty. i don't fucking KNOW why. i just feel like i need something new. i can't wait. i can't FUCKING wait for it. i really can't. escape. tears. YES. alright. no. not that. shut up. i won't do that. don't be fucking stupid. why would i do that? you think i'd do that because you figure you know me so well. ah well. suppose you were wrong. suppose you didn't know me at all.